I looked up from a video I was watching on my phone, smiling at the pretty face of Stacy’s boss. I turned off the video and slid the phone into my back pocket as I stood.
“I don’t sit here all day.”
“You’re here in the morning and here in the evening. You and your sister must be close.”
“She might disagree.”
“Does she have trouble getting home alone?”
I laughed. “No. But we live in the same area, so it’s easier if we commute together.”
“So you work in this area?”
I shrugged, not really committing myself to anything.
“What do you do?”
“Public relations.”
Sara’s eyes brightened. “Then you and your sister are both writers?”
I shrugged. “I think Stacy is the better writer.”
“That’s a kind thing to say.” She touched my arm. “There’s a lot to be said about a man who cares so much about his sister.”
She was coming on to me, and I couldn’t say that I didn’t like it. She was a sexy woman, what with her gorgeous hazel eyes and that model’s figure. Months ago, I might have jumped at the opportunity to take a woman like her into my bed. But not now.
“I was wondering if I could take you to lunch,” she said, her hand sliding slowly up over my biceps.
“That’s generous, but I have plans.”
“Really?” She pushed out her bottom lip in a big, seductive pout. “Plans can be changed, can’t they?”
I glanced up at the building, trying to come up with a better excuse that would shut her down without hurting her feelings. It wasn’t that I couldn’t leave. I could find Stacy anywhere with the software Ian put on my phone, and I was pretty sure she was safe at work. But I wasn’t really interested in having a relationship with someone she worked with. Too many complications.
“I really should keep my appointment.”
She stuck her lip out again, but then moved closer to me, moving her hand from my arm to my chest, becoming a little more personal than our minute-long conversation really allowed.
“Dinner, then?”
“I—”
“Here,” she reached around and took my phone from my back pocket and quickly opened the phone app. That’ll teach me to put a lock on my phone. She called her own phone and then winked at me. “Now we have each other’s number.”
“Perfect.”
She smiled again, that gorgeous smile that made my balls tighten. “Call me.”
I watched her walk away. I was human. I was single. I was allowed to enjoy the sight of a beautiful ass moving in tight, silky slacks. And it was a wonderful sight.
***
“You need a life.”
“I have a life.”
“Following me around twenty-four seven isn’t a life.” Stacy gestured around herself, indicating the other people sharing this particular train car with us. “They all have lives. They all go to jobs and then go home to loved ones. They date and get married and have babies. That’s what you should be doing.”
“I will. Someday.”
“When?”
“When I find the woman I can see that sort of future with.”
“How are you going to find her if you aren’t going out?”
I glared at her, words I didn’t want to say sitting on the tip of my tongue. She looked up at me, light dancing in her golden-brown eyes despite the dim light of the train.
“Go out. Have a life.”
“Who do you suggest I go out with?”
“Sara. I know she asked you to lunch and you turned her down. She punished me for it by standing behind me all day, watching me work.”
“Sorry.”
“Don’t be. Just go out with her.”
“Why her?”
“Because she’s the first person who’s shown interest since you came to New York.”
“Do you really believe that?”
Her eyebrows rose. “Aren’t we the Casanova? Do you think all women just swoon when they see you coming?”
“I’ve never had trouble finding company.”
“Talk about ego.”
“Jealous?”
Her eyes widened. She stared at me, her jaw suddenly tight. “I wouldn’t care if you slept with the whole cast of Girls. Why would it bother me?”
But it was pretty clear that she was annoyed by the idea. And that made something inside of me come to life, a little spark of hope that shouldn’t have been there…let alone given a new bit of life.
I watched her walk into her building a while later, then retreated back to my room. I paced a little, restless without something to keep me occupied. I missed the work at MCorp, but that wasn’t it. I just…I would have rather been over at Stacy’s. Arguing with her was better than listening to my own thoughts.
There was a bottle of whiskey in the cupboard. It would be nice to find a little oblivion, but I hadn’t had a drink in six months. No, that wasn’t an option.
I paced a while longer, then pulled out my phone. What the hell? Whom would it hurt?
***
She showed up in a short skirt and a thin blouse, looking ripe for picking. I didn’t say a word. I just pulled her into the room and pressed her up against the wall, biting her throat as my hands found their way under her blouse. She giggled; this little sound that was filled with as much humor as it was desire. Her blouse came off easily, her bra so flimsy that I didn’t have to remove it to expose her perky nipples. They tasted like heaven, the moans that came from her lips as I nibbled them even more delicious.
It’d been almost a year since I was last with a woman. One-night stands had lost their allure, becoming more of a tiresome act than the adventure they’d been when I was in college. But the idea of committing to the kind of women I tended to be attracted to in these situations wasn’t ideal. These women were flighty, less than reliable. I wanted someone funny and entertaining and bright and easy to talk to. Someone who wanted the same things I did and who would be happy with a moderate existence. These women wanted excitement. They wanted instant gratification.
Not my style.
But I’d missed the pleasure that came with having a beautiful woman in my bed.
I picked Sara up and carried her to the bed, dropping her in the center with a squeak of the bedsprings. She looked a little startled, but then that smile that she’d been so easy with earlier in the day came back as I grabbed the bottom edge of her skirt and yanked. Her legs were long and thin, perfectly tan. Delightful. And those hips were narrow, the kind I could hold on to and touch my fingertips across her lower belly. So thin, but she was also tall and sturdy. Capable.
I pulled a condom out of a box in the nightstand that I kept there more out of habit than anything else, sliding it over my hard cock as Sara watched, her tongue moving slowly over her bottom lip. She didn’t seem too concerned about how much time we were taking on foreplay. Maybe flirting in front of her building this morning had been enough for her. I knelt on the bed and grabbed those narrow hips, flipping her over. She climbed up on her knees, as if she knew exactly what I was looking for. I slid inside of her, quick and easy, closing my eyes as I buried myself to the hilt. This was what I wanted. This was what I needed. A little release, a little pleasure.
I moved quickly, thrusting hard against her perfect ass. She made noises, little grunts with each thrust that were almost distracting. I closed my eyes, an image I once tried to fight coming to mind. I didn’t fight it today. It was getting too hard to fight my feelings, too hard to pretend I didn’t feel the way I did. I might never be able to make my fantasies come true, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t indulge them when there was little chance it would ever hurt anyone.
No one needed to know.
Sara reached back and grabbed my thigh, her nails, long and sharp, cutting into my flesh. I pounded harder, and she began to scream, pleasure dancing on each exclamation like she’d never been fucked like this. I had a feeling that wa
sn’t true, but I let her pretend whatever she wanted. I came hard, that image still in my head, that fantasy still playing itself out as I filled the reservoir in the head of the condom. When I was done, I pulled away, tossing the condom into a trashcan before collapsing against the pillows. Sara immediately twisted around, her pretty mouth swallowing my cock, licking up the little bit of cum that dribbled from my head. I pressed my fingers into her hair, encouraging her to take all she could handle. She hummed, and the vibrations moved through my cock with enough energy to encourage it to remain rigid.
“You’re so fucking sexy,” she mumbled, as she worked her way slowly up the length of my body.
“You’re not too bad yourself.”
She smiled, as she snuck a look at me from under her impressive eyelashes. “I knew the moment I saw you that I wanted to get you into bed.”
“Yeah?”
“I knew you’d be good.”
“How did you know that?”
“Just look at you. And that cock…” She sighed. “You’d be surprised how many good-looking guys in this city have teeny, tiny little cocks.”
I laughed. “I thought size didn’t matter.”
She gave me a look that suggested I might be insane. “It does matter, baby. Why do you think all the dildos these sex websites sell are so big? A girl needs to be filled properly to even hope to reach an orgasm.”
“I’ll try to remember that.”
“Oh, you have nothing to worry about, sweetheart.”
She reached over to the nightstand and rolled another condom over my cock. Then she climbed onto my lap, guiding me inside of her. I watched as she rolled her head back on her neck and sighed, her eyes closed, and her tongue moving slowly over her lips. She knew what she was doing; she knew what she wanted. She moved slowly, a finger pressed against her clit as she worked slowly up to an orgasm. It was almost like watching porn, as if I wasn’t really involved, just an observer. But then her cunt began to twitch, her muscles quivering, as her orgasm came upon her, that quiver pulling at my cock until I had to respond or I’d lose my mind.
I sat up, grabbing her hips and pulling her harder against me. She opened her eyes, a crazed light shining in them. She began to move in less of a roll and more of a thrust, riding my cock like a cowgirl on a bucking bull. She cried out as her orgasm overcame her, as I held her tight and thrust my cock deeper and deeper inside of her. I buried my mouth against her breasts as my own—my second—orgasm overcame me.
We collapsed against the bed when it was done. She laughed, rolling onto her side to look at me.
“You’re pretty amazing.”
“Thank you.”
“We’ll have to do this again sometime.”
She climbed off the bed and started to dress. I watched, admiring the way her body moved, especially when she bent over.
“You’re not going to buy me dinner?”
She glanced at me. “You don’t want that.”
“What makes you say that?”
“I’ve met guys like you before. You only called me because you can’t have what you really want.”
“And what’s that?”
She turned away and pulled on her blouse, buttoning it slowly.
“How many brothers would sit in front of a business office every day just to watch over their grown sister? How many brothers would care enough to even walk their sister to work every morning?”
“She’s my sister. It’s complicated.”
“Yeah, I can see that.” She stepped into her shoes, then came back, leaning close to kiss me gently. “Call me when you get over her.”
She disappeared before I could say anything. But what was there to say?
Stacy was my sister. I knew that in my head.
My heart, unfortunately, kept forgetting.
Chapter 5
Stacy
I wasn’t really spying on him. I just happened to glance out the window just in time to see Sara climb into the back of a taxi.
“You slept with her.”
He glanced up from the coffee pot. “Good morning to you, too.”
“I saw her leave your building. You slept with my boss.”
He shrugged. “You told me to get a life.”
“I hope you were good, at least,” I said, snatching the milk a little rougher than I’d intended out of the fridge. It sloshed inside its plastic container, creating bubbles along the top. “If you were bad and she makes me pay—”
“Don’t worry. She was plenty satisfied.”
The image that planted itself in my head was even more unpleasant than the idea of them being together in the first place. I’d felt uneasy ever since I watched her tuck her blouse into her skirt just before she climbed into the taxi, glancing over her shoulder at his windows. That glance had a possessiveness about it that I didn’t like. I wanted to…I don’t know what I wanted to do, but I didn’t like this tightness in my chest each time I thought about it.
“Are you going to see her again?”
“Maybe.”
Pain, like a knife slicing through my belly, burst through me. He turned, holding out a cup of coffee to me, but I suddenly didn’t want it. Who needs caffeine when you have an overbearing boss to contend with? And now that she’d slept with my brother…would she be more demanding or less? Which would I prefer?
“Does it bother you?”
I glanced at him, at the unreadable mask that was his face. Damn, why did he have to be so handsome? His hair was a little damp, curling right where it touched his collar. And his eyes were like little jewels, sparkling from his face like the kind of emeralds old, rich women wore in the movies Mom used to love. Those muscles, bulging from his t-shirt…I could almost imagine Sara’s long fingernails scraping over his skin, making those muscles twitch with excitement.
It did bother me, more than I wanted to admit.
“Should it?”
“If she makes things difficult at work, let me know. I’ll talk to her.”
“I don’t need your help.”
“Everyone needs a little help once in a while.”
“Not me.”
I walked off, snatching my satchel off the couch as I burst through the front door. He followed, closer behind me than I liked. Just like every day before, he walked me to work, stopping just outside the building. He’d be there still when I came out after work. It was insane that the one person I hated the most in the world was the one person I could count on the most.
“Morning, Stacy,” Sara said with a soft smile as I approached my desk. “I’ve decided to put you on the cereal campaign.”
My eyebrows rose. The cereal campaign was for the company’s biggest client, Bronson Incorporated. Everyone wanted to work on the campaign.
“You’ll be working with Philip’s team, coming up with ideas on how to approach the campaign, on the types of commercials and print ads we’ll want to do. Meet us in the conference room in fifteen.”
She walked away, a new sway to her hips.
Killian must have been really good with her last night.
I should have been excited. Only three days on the job and I was working on one of the most coveted campaigns. Yet, I found myself getting distracted during the meetings. Sara had to kick my shin more than once to get me to pay attention. I kept staring at her, trying to imagine Killian with her. I just couldn’t do it. She wasn’t the one who should be with him.
“Is there a problem?” Sara asked late in the evening, pulling me aside as the last meeting broke up.
“No.”
“Is this about your brother?”
I shrugged, but then I found myself focusing on her more intently than I’d been able to focus on anything all day.
“Are you going to see him again?”
She bit her bottom lip, looking way for a second. When she focused on me again, there was almost a sadness in her eyes. “I don’t think so,” she said slowly. “He’s in love with someone else.”
I shook my head. “
He hasn’t been seeing anyone.”
Sara’s eyebrows rose. “You’re more naive than I ever would have guessed. Can’t you tell when a man is crazy about you?”
She walked away before I could ask what the hell she meant. Did she really think Killian was in love with me? That was ridiculous. He was my brother.
Well, not by blood. Not even legally since Abigail and Brian never really adopted me. I took their name, but there was nothing official on the books. I was just a foster kid.
But still…Killian was not in love with me.
Was he?
I found myself staring at him on the subway ride home. He was standing on the other side of the train car again, flirting with a little girl who couldn’t have been more than four or five, the girl’s mother beaming up at him as if he was some sort of god. It was sweet of him, this big, gorgeous man taking the time to flirt with a child. You wouldn’t believe him capable of being so gentle if you saw him just walking down the street. But he was. He was full of a lot of surprises.
I couldn’t stop thinking about what Sara had said. If Killian was in love with me…could I go through with my plan? Could I seduce him, get him to commit, and then ruin everything the way he’d done to me? Could I get my revenge on him that way?
It would be more reliable. I wouldn’t fall in love with him the way someone else might. I wouldn’t have to worry about an accomplice backing out at the last minute.
But there was also the whole family connection. Would he allow himself to admit to his feelings for me? Killian had always had this strong sense of family, always coming to Sean and Ian’s defense in school. He held everyone together in the hours and days after Mom’s death, organizing the funeral and forcing us to move through our days, to eat and to sleep and to do all the things that grief made nearly impossible. If not for Killian, some of us might still be hiding under our covers, pretending that the world ended the day Mom died.
Could a man with such a devotion to family commit what essentially was incest?
Was it incest?
I was so confused. I didn’t know how I felt about this. But when I looked at him and I imagined myself touching him, kissing him, it wasn’t as unpleasant a thought as it should have been. We wouldn’t have to do more than kissing, right? Just enough to convince him I was the one he should commit his life to. I just wanted him to ask me to marry him, then I could dish out my revenge and make him pay for what he did to me.
KILLIAN: A Mafia Romance (The Callahans Book 2) Page 4