Date Shark

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by DelSheree Gladden


  “I had a bit of trouble sleeping last night as well,” Eli said, “because of you.”

  “That bad, huh?”

  This time Eli laughed in earnest. “Quite the opposite, actually.”

  Leila stared at him, not sure how to respond.

  “Sorry,” Eli said, “I’m getting a little ahead of myself. Why don’t I start with my list, first?”

  “Um, sure.”

  Pausing long enough to sample his sandwich and smoothie, Eli then took a notebook out of his blazer pocket. “I’m going to start at the beginning of the date and work my way through to the end, okay?”

  Leila nodded.

  “When I first arrived, you were overly tactile, shaking my hand with both of yours, clutching my arm with both hands very tightly. This is something that can make a man step back because he sees you as being too eager, someone who might start bringing up weddings and children on the first date. You didn’t, of course, but that is likely what will run through a man’s mind when a woman starts getting clingy on the first date. Be aware of how you touch your date and how they may perceive the contact. Keep it friendly, but not too friendly.”

  Oh. The gulp of smoothie Leila had just sucked up the straw slithered down her throat like sludge. She knew the way she shook his hand was too much, but she hadn’t thought about how she took his arm. Leila usually stuck pretty close to her dates because she worried about getting separated from them, and quite frankly, being forgotten. It had happened before. Not even once did she consider her nerves could be interpreted as desperation to commit.

  “This next one, I’ll mention only because I know you’ve probably been thinking about it. Tripping at the entrance, dropping things at the table. Being clumsy isn’t necessarily something that will turn a man off, but each time you got very embarrassed and that made you pull back from me. If tripping or dropping things is a concern for you, try to be a little more aware of your surroundings and plan ahead by leaving your purse in the car or bringing one small enough to set on the table without it getting in the way.”

  Leila nodded, appreciative of the tips. She really only got clumsy when she was nervous, but it buoyed her a small amount to know Eli didn’t think it was a big deal.

  “You may think letting a man help you lessens you in some way, but it makes a decent man happy to pull out a woman’s chair or walk her to her car. Frankly, if a man isn’t willing to do that for you, you shouldn’t be dating him. You deserve better than that,” Eli said, his compliment catching Leila off guard. “Don’t argue with your date if he wants to be polite by helping you. He knows you’re perfectly capable of doing it on your own, but he wants to be respectful, so let him.”

  Leila had to break in here. “I’m not one of those women who refuse to let men help her because she thinks it’s degrading. I’d love it if a man opened my door before getting into the car himself, or if after I cooked a meal he helped me clean up. I only argued because …”

  “Because you didn’t think you deserved my attention,” Eli finished. Leila sank back into her seat. Exactly. Eli eyed her like he might a puppy that didn’t make it outside on time, frustrated, but not angry. “Leila, that’s a worse reason than having a moral objection. And it goes along with my next point. You spent most of the evening talking down about yourself. You could never do so much at work, or accomplish great things on your own. You aren’t artistic. You gag at the sight of ginger. And you kept mentioning how we weren’t on a real date, as if you thought there was no chance you ever would be.”

  “I thought that because it’s true, Eli. I don’t date guys like you.”

  “Well, you should,” he said. As soon as the words left his mouth, he froze. Leila’s mind started whirring, trying to figure out why he said that and what he really meant.

  “Uh, anyway, you shouldn’t put yourself down on a date, or ever really, but especially not when you’re out with a guy you’re interested in. If you don’t think you’re amazing, why should he?” Eli avoided Leila’s gaze by taking a bite of his sandwich. “Along the same lines, try not to sound too negative. When I asked you about the interns becoming real designers, you instantly went sour.”

  “That’s what I really think, though. You want me to lie and pretend I think they’ll all become millionaires?” At their pre-date meeting, Eli kept harping on how important it was for her to be honest.

  “No, I’m not saying you should lie, but don’t make the world sound so doom and gloom. You could have said, ‘The chances of success aren’t very high for young designers, but the ones that work hard and are truly creative will make it big.’ Would that have been untrue?”

  Leila’s frown wrinkled her nose as she thought. “No, that’s true, I guess. Most of the interns won’t make it big, but the ones who really deserve it will.”

  “See,” Eli said with a smile, “there’s always a positive side. Keep that in mind on your next date. And the next time you’re out with a man, try asking him a few questions, as well. Women who talk too much about themselves makes guys panic faster than almost anything. They think she’ll want him to talk about feelings and plans for the future and all those things guys don’t like to talk about.”

  Leila could feel her entire body going scarlet. “I … I didn’t ask because … well, because I already knew what you did, and … we weren’t on a real date. After today, I’ll never see you again.”

  “That’s how it is with the majority of first dates. You have no idea whether date one will lead to date two, but that shouldn’t stop you from exploring who that person is. If you never find out, then the relationship definitely won’t go anywhere,” Eli said. He paused, one corner of his mouth turning up slightly. “Besides, you shouldn’t let thinking you don’t have a chance with someone stop you from trying. You never know where a chance encounter might lead.”

  Okay …. Maybe because Leila was clearly not on the same level of general awesomeness as Eli, she had no clue whether he was trying to make a joke, tease her, or something else entirely with his little comments and looks. Leila decided it didn’t matter. Joke or not, there was really no reason Eli and Leila would ever sit down to a meal together again.

  “So, what else?” Leila asked.

  “Be honest. About everything, including the food.”

  If Leila thought she was blushing earlier, she knew she must have looked like a cherry tomato after that comment. She tried to hide her dislike for her entrée, and thought she had done pretty well. “I really did like most of the food, just not the sauce on the fish.”

  “Then why did you order it?” Eli asked, chuckling at her idiocy.

  “Because I didn’t know what anything was on the menu. I’d never actually had miso before, but I figured it must be good if it was the chef’s special.”

  “You could have just asked me what some of the items on the menu were.”

  “I didn’t want to look stupid,” Leila mumbled, knowing full well that she did just that by not asking. Her hands slid up her face and attempted to cover her shame.

  Eli chuckled at her and pulled one of her hands away from her face. Leila expected him to drop it once he could see her again, but he didn’t. His eyes meet Leila’s, and she suddenly had trouble remembering why she was hiding in the first place. Nothing about his eyes was all that remarkable, but the confidence in them when he looked at her made it difficult to look away.

  “Let me give you a tip, Leila,” Eli said, still looking directly at her. “If you’re going to a restaurant you’ve never been to before, look up their menu online before the date. Google whatever you’re not familiar with. And if you order something you don’t like, have the waiter take it back. Especially when you’re paying Conrad’s prices. Be prepared, and take charge of the situation.”

  “Easier said than done.”

  Sitting back and releasing her hand, Eli said, “It just takes practice.”

  Leila watched his hand go to his notebook and close it. She should
n’t have, but she missed his touch. Eli made her feel like she might actually be able to find the life she was looking for. “You closed your notebook, but I know there must be more. The biggest reason my love life is so depressing.”

  “There’s one small problem with that,” Eli said as he folded his arms across his chest. Leila’s eyebrows rose, curious and a little worried. “There is no biggest reason.”

  “What?”

  “You’re not perfect, nobody is, but all these little faults, they’re nothing that’s going to keep you from finding love. Doing impressions of cartoon characters all night, or repeating everything you say three times, those are problems. You have no grand fault, Leila. You’re a lovely young woman with a wonderful personality.”

  “Then why did I call you, Eli?” she asked, annoyed that he didn’t have an answer for her. “Why can’t I find a guy who wants to be with me?”

  The quiet that hovered between her question and Eli’s answer became heavier the longer he waited. He frowned, then leaned forward and stared at her. “Maybe the man who wants to be with you is just waiting for you to notice him.”

  That was it? Where was her magic answer that would have her leaping off into her happily ever after by the end of the week. Leila’s whole body crumpled in on itself, frustrated and annoyed. Eli leaned back against the booth and smiled at her sour expression. “What? Not the answer you were hoping for? I’d think you’d be happy to hear that there isn’t anything horribly wrong with you.”

  Leila slouched down in her chair even more. “I just had … different expectations.”

  “You wanted me to give you the key to happiness?” There was no laughter in his voice this time. Instead there was a hint of sadness. “There is no magic spell or easy answer, Leila. If there was, I wouldn’t be single either.”

  Leila’s head popped back up. Single? She hadn’t really thought about Eli’s availability, but his being single was quite a shock. If anyone should have been living their happily ever after, it should have been him. Although, Leila supposed, a wife or girlfriend probably wouldn’t have put up him taking women out on dates every weekend.

  Eli continued, not noticing Leila’s reaction. “Almost every woman that comes to me thinks I’ll fix their lives. All I can really do is give them advice and hope they follow it. For you, Leila, my advice is to quit thinking so hard about every moment. Don’t let what someone else might think of you dictate your decisions. Relax and let yourself enjoy life. You’ll feel more confident if you do, and confidence is always attractive.”

  Reaching into his jacket pocket, Eli removed an envelope and set it down in front of her. “This letter contains everything I just told you, so you can look at it again if you’d like.” He set his business card down on top of the envelope. It was the same one he had given Leila at their first meeting, with one difference. Scrawled beneath his expertly printed name was a cell phone number written in by hand.

  Noticing her interest in the addition, Eli said, “I like to stay in contact with my clients, see how they’re doing after I leave. You can also call if you have any questions or need advice about a particular situation.”

  “Wow, thanks.” Leila picked up the envelope and card. The card she would keep nearby in her purse, the letter … well that was going deep down in her bottom desk drawer. She didn’t exactly want to sit up at night rereading her list of faults.

  “Now, I really would love to stay longer, but I’m afraid I have an appointment.”

  The most bizarre feeling of jealousy rushed through Leila. “Another date?” she asked.

  “No,” Eli said as he stood, “a counseling session.”

  Leila’s surprise pushed the strange jealousy aside. “I didn’t realize you practiced. I thought the date shark thing was your job.”

  “No, no. It’s just something I do on the side. I like being able to point people in the right direction and help them find a companion. My day job is as a couple’s therapist. I don’t usually work on the weekend, but this couple can’t meet with me any other time.”

  If Leila had asked Eli even a single question about himself the night before, she would have learned that his interests went deeper than a continual supply of dates. She had initially thought of Eli as talented and handsome, but shallow. Now she was the one who felt shallow. The crummy feeling in the pit of her stomach persisted as she stood up to join Eli. He held his hand out and they shook hands goodbye. With a good luck wish, Eli started toward the exit. He only got a few steps away before turning back.

  “I almost forgot. I had one other piece of advice for you, Leila.”

  “What was that?”

  Eli drummed his fingers against the attaché he was carrying, as if unsure. Whatever his doubts, he shook his head, and said, “Stick up for yourself, Leila. Don’t let anyone treat you like you aren’t good enough to be in their presence. You’re a wonderful person. Make sure everyone around you knows that.”

  “What do you …” Then she remembered the waiter. From the second he had walked up to their table, Leila felt like she was unwanted. The feeling returned and her eyes dropped to her shoes. She knew Dolcini was too classy for her, but she hated being reminded of that. Being made to feel that way in front of Eli, then and now, was enough to make her cry. The first tear was about to slip free when Eli’s hand pressed against her cheek.

  “Leila,” he said, waiting for her to look at him, “the way Tony treated you was inexcusable. I am so sorry he behaved as he did, and the only reason I didn’t call him on it right then was because I didn’t want to bring attention to it in front of you and make you feel worse. I did speak to Conrad after I walked you to your car, though. The next time you visit Dolcini you won’t have to worry about poor service from Tony.”

  “You mean …”

  Eli nodded. “Tony was let go. And before you say anything, Conrad expects a certain standard of service from his wait staff. Tony did not meet those standards. He deserved to be fired.”

  “Wow,” Leila said. She knew she should feel bad that a man was fired because of her. A very small part of her did, but the majority of her mind was wrapped up in a sense of satisfaction. Still, she was amazed Eli took the time to speak to his friend about their lousy waiter on her behalf. “I can’t believe you went to the trouble, Eli.”

  “That’s exactly why you didn’t speak up to Tony for yourself. You don’t seem to think you’re worth the trouble, in any circumstance,” Eli said, “but you are, Leila.”

  His compliment bathed her in an unfamiliar feeling.

  “The next time you’re at Dolcini, you’ll have a much better experience than last night. You won’t be being scrutinized by me, for one, but your waiter will be Conrad’s best,” Eli assured her.

  “That’s a nice thought, but I doubt I’ll ever go back to Dolcini. It’s a little too nice for me.” Even without Eli there to catalog her mistakes, she would still feel out of place.

  Leila didn’t expect Eli to agree with her, but when he handed her another envelope in response, she stared at it. The heavyweight cream envelope reminded her of the invitations her boss sent out before a private fashion show. It was elegant and beautiful. Leila looked up at Eli. “What is this?”

  “An invitation to have dinner with Conrad. It’s partly a way to apologize for Tony, and partly a way to see if all the good things Pierce said about you were true.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Absolutely. It’s for Friday night.” He smiled, though it looked forced for some reason.

  Leila didn’t know why Eli would lie to her about this, but she opened the envelope anyway. Her name scrawled in gold ink took up the majority of the invitation. The date and time followed. He wasn’t kidding. A high end restaurant owner wanted to go out with her. For about three seconds she was ecstatic, then her mind leapt back to last night and her fingers went rigid. Leila looked up at Eli, fully freaked out.

  “I can’t … I’ll make a fool of myself again
. Eli, I can’t.”

  “Yes, you can, Leila. Just remember what we talked about, and …” Eli paused. “… call me if you need anything. I mean it.”

  “Thanks, Eli.”

  They stood there in the aisle of the café saying nothing. Amid the hum of chaos that surrounded them, there was a pocket of silence. Even with the offer to call, Leila knew this was likely the last time she would ever see Eli Walsh. Just like the unexpected jealousy she felt earlier, she was surprised by how sad such a thought made her.

  The moment was broken when Eli smiled and said, “Have fun this weekend, Leila.”

  “Thanks,” she said, suddenly wishing her date wasn’t with Conrad.

  Chapter 4

  Hectic

  Monday morning brought Leila’s boss, Ana, into her little office. She plopped her tailored backside down on the corner of Leila’s desk and folded her arms across her chest. The motion drew Leila’s attention to the blouse she was wearing. The detailed beading plunging from the shoulder to the deep neckline relieved the headache that had started building the instant Leila walked through the door. The new Bohemian Bead line was supposed to have been finished two weeks ago. The delay had made her job a nightmare. If Ana was wearing one of her latest designs, it meant the production company had finally come through and Leila could get on with her marketing campaign.

  “So,” Ana said when Leila didn’t respond immediately, “how was the date shark?”

  When Ana first mentioned Eli to Leila, she had brushed off the suggestion as crazy. Not only was the fee Eli charged staggering, but she didn’t think she needed someone to fix her love life. She wasn’t that desperate. When her next date turned out to be with a guy who spent the entire evening parading her around in front of his ex at a business party just to watch her face turn red, Leila decided she could use some help after all. She had known Drew for a few years through one of the companies they contracted with. How she didn’t see his intentions even though she knew he and his girlfriend had recently broken up proved Leila was floundering when it came to dating. The next day she broke down and asked Ana for Eli’s number.

 

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