‘GET IT!’ Harry bellowed, and with a rushing, roaring sound, the silver stag he had conjured came galloping past him. The Dementor’s eyeless face was barely an inch from Dudley’s when the silver antlers caught it; the thing was thrown up into the air and, like its fellow, it soared away and was absorbed into the darkness; the stag cantered to the end of the alleyway and dissolved into silver mist.
Moon, stars and streetlamps burst back into life. A warm breeze swept the alleyway. Trees rustled in neighbouring gardens and the mundane rumble of cars in Magnolia Crescent filled the air again. Harry stood quite still, all his senses vibrating, taking in the abrupt return to normality. After a moment, he became aware that his T-shirt was sticking to him; he was drenched in sweat.
He could not believe what had just happened. Dementors here, in Little Whinging.
Dudley lay curled up on the ground, whimpering and shaking. Harry bent down to see whether he was in a fit state to stand up, but then he heard loud, running footsteps behind him. Instinctively raising his wand again, he spun on his heel to face the newcomer.
Mrs Figg, their batty old neighbour, came panting into sight. Her grizzled grey hair was escaping from its hairnet, a clanking string shopping bag was swinging from her wrist and her feet were halfway out of her tartan carpet slippers. Harry made to stow his wand hurriedly out of sight, but –
‘Don’t put it away, idiot boy!’ she shrieked. ‘What if there are more of them around? Oh, I’m going to kill Mundungus Fletcher!’
— CHAPTER TWO —
A Peck of Owls
‘What?’ said Harry blankly.
‘He left!’ said Mrs Figg, wringing her hands. ‘Left to see someone about a batch of cauldrons that fell off the back of a broom! I told him I’d flay him alive if he went, and now look! Dementors! It’s just lucky I put Mr Tibbles on the case! But we haven’t got time to stand around! Hurry, now, we’ve got to get you back! Oh, the trouble this is going to cause! I will kill him!’
‘But –’ The revelation that his batty old cat-obsessed neighbour knew what Dementors were was almost as big a shock to Harry as meeting two of them down the alleyway. ‘You’re – you’re a witch?’
‘I’m a Squib, as Mundungus knows full well, so how on earth was I supposed to help you fight off Dementors? He left you completely without cover when I’d warned him –’
‘This Mundungus has been following me? Hang on – it was him! He Disapparated from the front of my house!’
‘Yes, yes, yes, but luckily I’d stationed Mr Tibbles under a car just in case, and Mr Tibbles came and warned me, but by the time I got to your house you’d gone – and now – oh, what’s Dumbledore going to say? You!’ she shrieked at Dudley, still supine on the alley floor. ‘Get your fat bottom off the ground, quick!’
‘You know Dumbledore?’ said Harry, staring at her.
‘Of course I know Dumbledore, who doesn’t know Dumbledore? But come on – I’ll be no help if they come back, I’ve never so much as Transfigured a teabag.’
She stooped down, seized one of Dudley’s massive arms in her wizened hands and tugged.
‘Get up, you useless lump, get up!’
But Dudley either could not or would not move. He remained on the ground, trembling and ashen-faced, his mouth shut very tight.
‘I’ll do it.’ Harry took hold of Dudley’s arm and heaved. With an enormous effort he managed to hoist him to his feet. Dudley seemed to be on the point of fainting. His small eyes were rolling in their sockets and sweat was beading his face; the moment Harry let go of him he swayed dangerously.
‘Hurry up!’ said Mrs Figg hysterically.
Harry pulled one of Dudley’s massive arms around his own shoulders and dragged him towards the road, sagging slightly under the weight. Mrs Figg tottered along in front of them, peering anxiously around the corner.
‘Keep your wand out,’ she told Harry, as they entered Wisteria Walk. ‘Never mind the Statute of Secrecy now, there’s going to be hell to pay anyway, we might as well be hanged for a dragon as an egg. Talk about the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery … this was exactly what Dumbledore was afraid of – What’s that at the end of the street? Oh, it’s just Mr Prentice … don’t put your wand away, boy, don’t I keep telling you I’m no use?’
It was not easy to hold a wand steady and haul Dudley along at the same time. Harry gave his cousin an impatient dig in the ribs, but Dudley seemed to have lost all desire for independent movement. He was slumped on Harry’s shoulder, his large feet dragging along the ground.
‘Why didn’t you tell me you’re a Squib, Mrs Figg?’ asked Harry, panting with the effort to keep walking. ‘All those times I came round your house – why didn’t you say anything?’
‘Dumbledore’s orders. I was to keep an eye on you but not say anything, you were too young. I’m sorry I gave you such a miserable time, Harry, but the Dursleys would never have let you come if they’d thought you enjoyed it. It wasn’t easy, you know … but oh my word,’ she said tragically, wringing her hands once more, ‘when Dumbledore hears about this – how could Mundungus have left, he was supposed to be on duty until midnight – where is he? How am I going to tell Dumbledore what’s happened? I can’t Apparate.’
‘I’ve got an owl, you can borrow her.’ Harry groaned, wondering whether his spine was going to snap under Dudley’s weight.
‘Harry, you don’t understand! Dumbledore will need to act as quickly as possible, the Ministry have their own ways of detecting underage magic, they’ll know already, you mark my words.’
‘But I was getting rid of Dementors, I had to use magic – they’re going to be more worried about what Dementors were doing floating around Wisteria Walk, surely?’
‘Oh, my dear, I wish it were so, but I’m afraid – MUNDUNGUS FLETCHER, I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!’
There was a loud crack and a strong smell of drink mingled with stale tobacco filled the air as a squat, unshaven man in a tattered overcoat materialised right in front of them. He had short, bandy legs, long straggly ginger hair and bloodshot, baggy eyes that gave him the doleful look of a basset hound. He was also clutching a silvery bundle that Harry recognised at once as an Invisibility Cloak.
‘’S’up, Figgy?’ he said, staring from Mrs Figg to Harry and Dudley. ‘What ’appened to staying undercover?’
‘I’ll give you undercover!’ cried Mrs Figg. ‘Dementors, you useless, skiving sneak thief!’
‘Dementors?’ repeated Mundungus, aghast. ‘Dementors, ’ere?’
‘Yes, here, you worthless pile of bat droppings, here!’ shrieked Mrs Figg. ‘Dementors attacking the boy on your watch!’
‘Blimey,’ said Mundungus weakly, looking from Mrs Figg to Harry, and back again. ‘Blimey, I –’
‘And you off buying stolen cauldrons! Didn’t I tell you not to go? Didn’t I?’
‘I – well, I –’ Mundungus looked deeply uncomfortable. ‘It – it was a very good business opportunity, see –’
Mrs Figg raised the arm from which her string bag dangled and whacked Mundungus around the face and neck with it; judging by the clanking noise it made it was full of cat food.
‘Ouch – gerroff – gerroff, you mad old bat! Someone’s gotta tell Dumbledore!’
‘Yes – they – have!’ yelled Mrs Figg, swinging the bag of cat food at every bit of Mundungus she could reach. ‘And – it – had – better – be – you – and – you – can – tell – him – why – you – weren’t – there – to – help!’
‘Keep your ’airnet on!’ said Mundungus, his arms over his head, cowering. ‘I’m going, I’m going!’
And with another loud crack, he vanished.
‘I hope Dumbledore murders him!’ said Mrs Figg furiously. ‘Now come on, Harry, what are you waiting for?’
Harry decided not to waste his remaining breath on pointing out that he could barely walk under Dudley’s bulk. He gave the semi-conscious Dudley a heave and staggered onwards.
‘I’ll take
you to the door,’ said Mrs Figg, as they turned into Privet Drive. ‘Just in case there are more of them around … oh my word, what a catastrophe … and you had to fight them off yourself … and Dumbledore said we were to keep you from doing magic at all costs … well, it’s no good crying over spilt potion, I suppose … but the cat’s among the pixies now.’
‘So,’ Harry panted, ‘Dumbledore’s … been having … me followed?’
‘Of course he has,’ said Mrs Figg impatiently. ‘Did you expect him to let you wander around on your own after what happened in June? Good Lord, boy, they told me you were intelligent … right … get inside and stay there,’ she said, as they reached number four. ‘I expect someone will be in touch with you soon enough.’
‘What are you going to do?’ asked Harry quickly.
‘I’m going straight home,’ said Mrs Figg, staring around the dark street and shuddering. ‘I’ll need to wait for more instructions. Just stay in the house. Goodnight.’
‘Hang on, don’t go yet! I want to know –’
But Mrs Figg had already set off at a trot, carpet slippers flopping, string bag clanking.
‘Wait!’ Harry shouted after her. He had a million questions to ask anyone who was in contact with Dumbledore; but within seconds Mrs Figg was swallowed by the darkness. Scowling, Harry readjusted Dudley on his shoulder and made his slow, painful way up number four’s garden path.
The hall light was on. Harry stuck his wand back inside the waistband of his jeans, rang the bell and watched Aunt Petunia’s outline grow larger and larger, oddly distorted by the rippling glass in the front door.
‘Diddy! About time too, I was getting quite – quite – Diddy, what’s the matter?’
Harry looked sideways at Dudley and ducked out from under his arm just in time. Dudley swayed on the spot for a moment, his face pale green … then he opened his mouth and vomited all over the doormat.
‘DIDDY! Diddy, what’s the matter with you? Vernon? VERNON!’
Harry’s uncle came galumphing out of the living room, walrus moustache blowing hither and thither as it always did when he was agitated. He hurried forwards to help Aunt Petunia negotiate a weak-kneed Dudley over the threshold while avoiding stepping in the pool of sick.
‘He’s ill, Vernon!’
‘What is it, son? What’s happened? Did Mrs Polkiss give you something foreign for tea?’
‘Why are you all covered in dirt, darling? Have you been lying on the ground?’
‘Hang on – you haven’t been mugged, have you, son?’
Aunt Petunia screamed.
‘Phone the police, Vernon! Phone the police! Diddy, darling, speak to Mummy! What did they do to you?’
In all the kerfuffle nobody seemed to have noticed Harry, which suited him perfectly. He managed to slip inside just before Uncle Vernon slammed the door and, while the Dursleys made their noisy progress down the hall towards the kitchen, Harry moved carefully and quietly towards the stairs.
‘Who did it, son? Give us names. We’ll get them, don’t worry.’
‘Shh! He’s trying to say something, Vernon! What is it, Diddy? Tell Mummy!’
Harry’s foot was on the bottom-most stair when Dudley found his voice.
‘Him.’
Harry froze, foot on the stair, face screwed up, braced for the explosion.
‘BOY! COME HERE!’
With a feeling of mingled dread and anger, Harry removed his foot slowly from the stair and turned to follow the Dursleys.
The scrupulously clean kitchen had an oddly unreal glitter after the darkness outside. Aunt Petunia was ushering Dudley into a chair; he was still very green and clammy-looking. Uncle Vernon was standing in front of the draining board, glaring at Harry through tiny, narrowed eyes.
‘What have you done to my son?’ he said in a menacing growl.
‘Nothing,’ said Harry, knowing perfectly well that Uncle Vernon wouldn’t believe him.
‘What did he do to you, Diddy?’ Aunt Petunia said in a quavering voice, now sponging sick from the front of Dudley’s leather jacket. ‘Was it – was it you-know-what, darling? Did he use – his thing?’
Slowly, tremulously, Dudley nodded.
‘I didn’t!’ Harry said sharply, as Aunt Petunia let out a wail and Uncle Vernon raised his fists. ‘I didn’t do anything to him, it wasn’t me, it was –’
But at that precise moment a screech owl swooped in through the kitchen window. Narrowly missing the top of Uncle Vernon’s head, it soared across the kitchen, dropped the large parchment envelope it was carrying in its beak at Harry’s feet, turned gracefully, the tips of its wings just brushing the top of the fridge, then zoomed outside again and off across the garden.
‘OWLS!’ bellowed Uncle Vernon, the well-worn vein in his temple pulsing angrily as he slammed the kitchen window shut. ‘OWLS AGAIN! I WILL NOT HAVE ANY MORE OWLS IN MY HOUSE!’
But Harry was already ripping open the envelope and pulling out the letter inside, his heart pounding somewhere in the region of his Adam’s apple.
Dear Mr Potter,
We have received intelligence that you performed the Patronus Charm at twenty-three minutes past nine this evening in a Muggle inhabited area and in the presence of a Muggle.
The severity of this breach of the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery has resulted in your expulsion from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Ministry representatives will be calling at your place of residence shortly to destroy your wand.
As you have already received an official warning for a previous offence under Section 13 of the International Confederation of Warlocks’ Statute of Secrecy, we regret to inform you that your presence is required at a disciplinary hearing at the Ministry of Magic at 9 a.m. on the twelfth of August.
Hoping you are well,
Yours sincerely,
Mafalda Hopkirk
Improper Use of Magic Office
Ministry of Magic
Harry read the letter through twice. He was only vaguely aware of Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia talking. Inside his head, all was icy and numb. One fact had penetrated his consciousness like a paralysing dart. He was expelled from Hogwarts. It was all over. He was never going back.
He looked up at the Dursleys. Uncle Vernon was purple-faced, shouting, his fists still raised; Aunt Petunia had her arms around Dudley, who was retching again.
Harry’s temporarily stupefied brain seemed to reawaken. Ministry representatives will be calling at your place of residence shortly to destroy your wand. There was only one thing for it. He would have to run – now. Where he was going to go, Harry didn’t know, but he was certain of one thing: at Hogwarts or outside it, he needed his wand. In an almost dreamlike state, he pulled his wand out and turned to leave the kitchen.
‘Where d’you think you’re going?’ yelled Uncle Vernon. When Harry didn’t reply, he pounded across the kitchen to block the doorway into the hall. ‘I haven’t finished with you, boy!’
‘Get out of the way,’ said Harry quietly.
‘You’re going to stay here and explain how my son –’
‘If you don’t get out of the way I’m going to jinx you,’ said Harry, raising the wand.
‘You can’t pull that one on me!’ snarled Uncle Vernon. ‘I know you’re not allowed to use it outside that madhouse you call a school!’
‘The madhouse has chucked me out,’ said Harry. ‘So I can do whatever I like. You’ve got three seconds. One – two –’
A resounding CRACK filled the kitchen. Aunt Petunia screamed, Uncle Vernon yelled and ducked, but for the third time that night Harry was searching for the source of a disturbance he had not made. He spotted it at once: a dazed and ruffled-looking barn owl was sitting outside on the kitchen sill, having just collided with the closed window.
Ignoring Uncle Vernon’s anguished yell of ‘OWLS!’ Harry crossed the room at a run and wrenched the window open. The owl stuck out its leg, to which a small roll of parchment was tied, shoo
k its feathers, and took off the moment Harry had taken the letter. Hands shaking, Harry unfurled the second message, which was written very hastily and blotchily in black ink.
Harry –
Dumbledore’s just arrived at the Ministry and he’s trying to sort it all out. DO NOT LEAVE YOUR AUNT AND UNCLE’S HOUSE. DO NOT DO ANY MORE MAGIC. DO NOT SURRENDER YOUR WAND.
Arthur Weasley
Dumbledore was trying to sort it all out … what did that mean? How much power did Dumbledore have to override the Ministry of Magic? Was there a chance that he might be allowed back to Hogwarts, then? A small shoot of hope burgeoned in Harry’s chest, almost immediately strangled by panic – how was he supposed to refuse to surrender his wand without doing magic? He’d have to duel with the Ministry representatives, and if he did that, he’d be lucky to escape Azkaban, let alone expulsion.
His mind was racing … he could run for it and risk being captured by the Ministry, or stay put and wait for them to find him here. He was much more tempted by the former course, but he knew Mr Weasley had his best interests at heart … and after all, Dumbledore had sorted out much worse than this before.
‘Right,’ Harry said, ‘I’ve changed my mind, I’m staying.’
He flung himself down at the kitchen table and faced Dudley and Aunt Petunia. The Dursleys appeared taken aback at his abrupt change of mind. Aunt Petunia glanced despairingly at Uncle Vernon. The vein in his purple temple was throbbing worse than ever.
‘Who are all these ruddy owls from?’ he growled.
‘The first one was from the Ministry of Magic, expelling me,’ said Harry calmly. He was straining his ears to catch any noises outside, in case the Ministry representatives were approaching, and it was easier and quieter to answer Uncle Vernon’s questions than to have him start raging and bellowing. ‘The second one was from my friend Ron’s dad, who works at the Ministry.’
The Order of the Phoenix Page 3