by Kat Mizera
“Mmmm, I love hearing that.” He stroked his hand down my back and over the curve of my ass. “But first, flip over and let me nibble on that ass of yours.”
I turned onto my stomach and closed my eyes, losing myself in how it felt to have his hands all over me. He ran them down the center of my spine, the curve of my hips, the backs of my thighs. Then he nipped my ass cheeks, grazing me with his teeth, harder and then softer, squeezing and caressing, until my insides were tight with need. I wanted him inside of me so bad, but since we couldn’t, I’d bask in his attention instead.
He lifted me to my knees and spread them apart, keeping my torso flat on the bed, and then he moved between my legs, running his tongue from my clit to my asshole. I moaned, deep in my chest, moving against him.
“Mine,” he whispered. “This gorgeous body is all fucking mine. Say it.”
“Yours,” I said in a shaky voice. His tongue was inside of me now and I was so close I was going to embarrass myself. He was fingering my ass, something I’d come to love, and devouring me like this was his last supper or something.
“Patrick!” I squeaked out his name and then my world went white. Weeks of pent-up sadness, passion, and frustration exploded out of me in a series of waves so strong I stopped breathing for a few seconds. Then he pushed his finger deeper into my ass and I came again, bucking and writhing as he held me in place.
“That’s my girl.” He pressed a few light kisses on my lower back before my knees gave out and I landed flat on my stomach again.
“I’m calling the doctor first thing Monday morning,” I said, still trying to catch my breath.
“Definitely.” He collapsed beside me and I turned my head to look at him.
“Now what do we do?” I asked.
“We can get dressed and go back to the party or we can lie here and cuddle all night.”
“Your choice,” I said. “You’re the champion.”
“I’ve done a lot of partying since I got to Moo U. I’d rather spend tonight with the woman I love.”
“So…are we going to Vegas?”
“That’s up to you. Tell me what you want and I’ll do it. I realized pretty quickly that my life didn’t mean much without you in it. If you think some time off would give you the freedom to search for your true passion, then yes, let’s go to Vegas. If not, I’ll stay at school and we’ll have a whole year to come up with a new plan.”
“I’ve wanted a gap year for a long time,” I admitted. “But I never dared say it or even really think it. The fact that you understood that even before I did is one of many reasons why I love you—and don’t want to be without you.”
“What’s your mom going to say?”
I shook my head vehemently. “We are so not talking about her tonight.”
“I love you, Ellie. I need to hear you say it.”
“I love you too, Patrick.” We smiled into each other’s eyes and I’d never been more secure in any decision I’d made. Now if I could somehow salvage my relationship with my mother, things would be pretty damn amazing.
37
Patrick
The week following winning the tournament was one of the best of my life. I had my girl back, I was a fucking hero around campus, and as far as I was concerned, my father was no longer part of my life. He’d tried calling, texting, and showing up at the hotel before we’d left, but security had kept him away from us and I’d blocked his number. A tiny part of me felt guilty, because he was still my father, and really the only family I had left other than my twin, but I couldn’t take the toxicity he brought to my life. Paxton felt the same and we’d both washed our hands of him. We’d be there if he was ever sick or something, but unless and until he had a major change of attitude, we were done.
Which made officially meeting Ellie’s parents today that much more important. She hadn’t yet told her mother about us or our plans to move to Las Vegas, so today was either going to be really bad or surprisingly good. Ellie was a nervous wreck as we drove out to Brattleboro and all I could do was hold her hand and tell her I had her back, no matter what.
“How sad will it be if we lose all four of our parents?” she asked when we were almost there.
I sighed. “Pretty sad, but my gut tells me no. Your mom is overbearing but when you were sick, she was there in an instant. My dad probably would’ve told me to suck it up and then would’ve asked how long until I could be back on the ice.”
She wrinkled her nose. “Was he always this way?”
“Maybe? I think my mom was a buffer when she was still alive, but once she died, he just got worse and worse.”
“Well, here goes nothing.” She motioned to a long, winding driveway and I turned in.
“It’s going to be okay,” I told her. “And I’ll be right there.”
We walked up to the front door holding hands. I had a bottle of red wine in my other hand and hoped to make a good impression. I’d dressed up a little, in dress pants, a button-down shirt, and dress shoes, and Ellie had laughed at me. But it was Easter Sunday and I figured dressing up would both help celebrate the holiday and potentially make a better impression than jeans and a polo shirt.
Ellie looked adorable in a white peasant skirt and a pale green sweater. It was warmer now that it was almost mid-April, but there was still a chill in the air. We had heavier jackets in the car because it would be cold on the drive back to campus later tonight.
“Hi, guys.” Ellie’s father opened the door. “Happy Easter.”
“Happy Easter, Dad.” Ellie hugged him and I held out my hand.
“Happy Easter, Mr. McGinn.”
“Please. Call me Russ.”
“Thank you.” I handed him the bottle of wine. “Ellie said Mrs. McGinn is making a pot roast, so I thought red would go well.”
“Excellent. Thank you.”
We walked through a warm, well-lit house and into the kitchen.
“Ellie.” Her mother turned, a spoon in her hand. “Happy Easter.”
“Happy Easter, Mom. Patrick, this is my mother, Abby McGinn. Mom, Patrick Graham.”
“Nice to meet you.” Her mother didn’t look impressed with me and I just tried to look polite.
We made small talk in the kitchen as the ladies finished cooking and Russ set the table. I tried to help but they wouldn’t let me do anything, which was probably for the best, and eventually they brought up the Frozen Four.
“So putting aside the fact that you’re my daughter’s boyfriend, I’ve got to go into fan mode for a minute,” Russ said. “I mean, that overtime goal was…” He seemed to be fumbling for the word.
“Epic?” Ellie supplied, laughing.
“Amazing,” he said, nodding. “How’d you do that?”
I chuckled. “It’s what I’ve done since I was little. Hockey is what I do.”
“What else will you do?” Abby asked pointedly. “When you’re done with hockey?”
“Hopefully, that won’t be for a long time,” I replied. “I’m only three classes shy of my bachelor’s in business, and I plan to take two this summer and one next fall if I can take it virtually. So I’ll have options if my hockey career is cut short.” I’d prepared for questions like this.
“Tell us about your family,” Russ said, changing the direction of the conversation.
“My dad played professional hockey for one season before he had a career-ending injury,” I said. “He’s worked construction since then. My mother died in a car accident when I was ten so I don’t remember her much, but I have an identical twin brother, Paxton, who’s also going to play in the pros next year.”
Abby arched a brow. “So you’re leaving soon?”
“We need to talk about that,” Ellie interjected slowly, moving closer to me. “Patrick is taking two classes this summer while I’m teaching, but as soon as classes are over, we’re moving to Las Vegas.”
Abby put down the spoon she’d been holding with a thud. “You have got to be kidding me. Just what do you think you’re
going to do in Las Vegas?”
“Whatever I want,” Ellie said softly. “I’m taking a gap year so I have time to decide where I want to end up.”
“You just can’t bear to break things off so you’re going to give up everything to follow him! And I won’t let you do it! I won’t let you ruin your life, having babies while you’re still practically a baby and—” She burst into tears.
“Mom.” Ellie walked over to her mother and put a gentle hand on her arm. “Mom, listen to me. Patrick isn’t your ex. I don’t know who he is or what he did, but that’s not Patrick and I’m not pregnant. Nor do I plan to be. My pregnancy was a fluke.”
“But it happened!”
“Yes, but we weren’t careless. And we’re going to be super careful going forward. I’m getting a birth control implant and we’re going to keep using condoms until we’re satisfied that I’m protected. Neither of us is ready for a baby and I’m not giving up anything.”
“If you leave school now—”
“Lots of people take gap years. What, you think I’m going to be happy sitting home doing nothing while he plays hockey? Mom, I’m going back to school. I just need time to grow up a little. I’ve been in college almost five years. I’m ready for a break. And Patrick needs me.”
“I love Ellie.” I finally spoke up, unwilling to interrupt the mother/daughter moment until now. “And I’m going to support her in whatever way she needs. Emotionally, financially, whatever it takes.”
“You’re going to support her?” Russ finally joined the conversation. “Will you be able to?”
“I’ll be making almost a million dollars next year,” I said quietly. I hated talking about money but I understood her parents would want to know that she would be okay. “I’ve already spoken to the team and they provide health insurance for domestic partners. I’m getting a signing bonus this summer that will help us get an apartment, so we’ll be fine. Ellie can take all the time she needs to find the right school, the right program…”
“But what about Harvard?” Abby sniffled.
“I don’t want to go to medical school,” Ellie whispered. “Please, Mom, don’t make me choose between Patrick and the career I really want, and you. Please.”
“That’s never going to happen.” Russ reached out to put an arm around his wife’s shoulders. “Abby, it’s time to let her go. And to let go of the past. She’s not making your mistakes; she’s making her own. Like this computer science thing she had to do. But she’s okay. We raised a brilliant girl with a good head on her shoulders.”
“But Las Vegas is so far away…” Abby started to cry again.
“We can go visit,” Russ said, hugging her.
“And we’ll be here most of the summer,” Ellie pointed out. “We’re not going anywhere yet.”
“I think we need wine,” Russ said, turning to open the bottle.
Dinner was great. The food was good, Ellie seemed happy, and her parents actually seemed interested in knowing all about me and my plans with the Sidewinders. Once they accepted the idea that Ellie was taking a year off to grow up, and going with me to Las Vegas, they warmed up to it, talking about coming to help us get settled and Ellie and her mom going shopping for some necessities since even modern young women needed at least some semblance of a dowry. I didn’t know what a dowry was so I discreetly looked it up on my phone.
Property or money brought by a bride to her husband on their marriage.
I almost laughed but kept a straight face as we continued discussing my future in hockey, Ellie’s plans, and how we’d spend our summer up until we left for Vegas. It was nice in a way I hadn’t experienced in a long time. Not since before my mother died, and I barely remembered those holidays. Dad had always been drunk on the holidays, ordering food instead of cooking, and throwing us a twenty-dollar bill or new hockey sticks instead of wrapped gifts at Christmas. Having a sit-down meal while all dressed up on an actual holiday felt like the kind of normal I’d unconsciously longed for all my life. My only regret now was that Paxton wasn’t here. And with him in Seattle, chances were we wouldn’t spend many holidays together going forward. I hadn’t thought about that until just now.
“Babe?” Ellie’s voice was soft as she searched my face. “You were a million miles away just now.”
“Thinking about how Paxton and I probably won’t spend another holiday together for a really long time.”
“But we can spend summers together. Maybe in a few years, when we’re a little more settled, we can buy some kind of beach house or condo, a place we can stay in together for parts of every summer. Maybe even big enough to enjoy when we all have kids.”
I reached for her, kissing her forehead. “You really do understand me like no one other than my twin ever has.”
“I’m your…sexual twin,” she said, straining to keep a straight face.
“I don’t even know what that means,” I said, chuckling.
“Well, he’s your physical and biological twin. I’m your emotional and lifetime twin.”
“My soul twin,” I amended, smiling down at her.
“Your forever twin.”
“Forever is right.”
38
Ellie
A few months later …
We moved into our new apartment in Las Vegas in mid-August, a month before Patrick had to report to training camp, and a couple weeks after finishing our summer semesters of school. Patrick had done the unthinkable—with the help of his advisor—and taken all three classes over the summer, so he’d be graduating in December. The third class technically hadn’t been available, but the school had worked with him to make it a project-type class, and with the help of the Sidewinders’ back office, he’d gotten it done.
The summer had been brutal. He’d taken both summer sessions, which were six weeks each, and he’d been nonstop the whole time. He’d been in classes all day five days a week and then did nothing but study at night and on the weekends. I’d taught one class in each of the summer sessions, but it hadn’t been nearly as much work for me. So while Patrick had busted his ass trying to graduate, I’d had free time. For the first time ever.
I read, did yoga most mornings, and even began swimming regularly in the university pool. I spent a week with my parents since Patrick was so busy, and it had been nice to just hang out with my mom. We’d gone shopping for tons of things Patrick and I would need in our new apartment and she’d taught me how to cook a few things since I didn’t know how.
Patrick and I had taken ten days to drive across the country from Vermont to Nevada, making it a mini-vacation since he hadn’t had any kind of break yet. We’d stopped in Chicago, Des Moines, and Denver and did a little sightseeing, so it hadn’t been nearly as tedious as we’d thought it would be to spend that much time in a vehicle. I’d never been to any of those places and he’d only been to Chicago for hockey-related events, which made it fun for both of us.
We’d gotten to town yesterday, and thanks to the Sidewinders, had an apartment we could move into. There was no furniture but we’d ordered a few things online and we were currently waiting for our bed, mattress, and bedroom furniture to arrive. I’d hung up our clothes in the master bedroom closet while he’d emptied my SUV. My parents had really gone overboard in getting us things we’d need to start our life together, which was a huge help and really sweet of them, considering everything that had happened during the school year.
“Where do you want this stuff?” Patrick asked, coming in with three more boxes.
“Kitchen,” I said, grinning at him. He looked hotter than ever in shorts and a tank top, a trickle of sweat sliding down one side of his face. I had an urge to lick it and playfully tugged him over to me.
“Gross,” he laughed as I kissed his sweaty face.
“I seem to recall a guy who likes kissing when we’re sweaty.”
“It’s a different kind of sweaty!”
I pressed my lips to his. “But it’s your sweat, so I like it all.”
&
nbsp; “God, you’re sexy.” He lifted me onto the kitchen counter and planted himself between my legs so he could kiss me properly. Lots of tongue and lips, until I was completely out of breath.
“I wish we could take this to the bedroom,” I moaned, “but you know that’s when the delivery will arrive.”
“We’ll be christening the new bed all night,” he said, laughing.
He was just about to kiss me again when there was a knock on the door.
“Who could that be?” I asked. “Isn’t this complex gated?”
“Several of the guys on the team live here,” Patrick said. “They must be coming by to say hello.” He walked over to the front door and opened it.
“Hi, guys!” Renee walked in looking around. “Congratulations on the new place and welcome to Las Vegas!”
“Thank you!” I ran over to hug her.
“I made scones and muffins.” She handed me a basket. “I figured you wouldn’t feel like baking until you get settled and—”
“I don’t know how to bake,” I told her, laughing. “It’s one of many things I plan to learn while I’m not in school.”
“I give lessons!” Renee said. “We’ll work on it once hockey season starts.”
“Hey!” Anton Petrov walked in carrying something that looked like a casserole. “My stepmom said you’d probably be too tired and busy to cook dinner today so she made this. Just put it in the oven at three-fifty for thirty minutes.”
“Oh, wow.” I took it from him. “Thank you for bringing it by. I’ll have to call her.”
Nate and Chelsea came in behind him, also carrying bags filled with food and groceries. “I know how hard it is to start from scratch,” Chelsea said, “so consider this a housewarming gift.”
“Thank you!” I hugged her, a little overwhelmed at how nice everyone was being.
“You need help with anything?” Nate asked Patrick.
“I was going to go pick up the barstools we ordered for the kitchen island but we’re waiting for the bedroom furniture to get here.”