To John

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To John Page 10

by Kim Itae


  Ana thougt,

  'DHs, 50 bn a month to buy bonds means QE. Wait? Wait for the rest of your life.'

  'Hang on... The reason to wait is to get the proper impact when the news is broken. Then again, what impact? Your trousers get too wet to do anything.'

  Three miserable hours later.

  'Sorry to say this but I think your life is in my hand. I will not kill you but you can be saved by me. Without me, you will meet an unexpected death in group.

  That was a fiction, right? That is a fiction, no? Is this relly a fiction?

  If this is not a fiction, what would you do? Or what would I do?' (From the Last Book)

  Ana's brief thinking before going to bed.

  'Today is finished anyway. Get a sleep. I will go to sleep. And we start tomorrow sharp at 6:00. I'm done. If you want to hang around, it is up to you. I like to hang around, but I do have personal stuff like eating dinner, earning some extra cash and caring my facial. I don't know who is thinking in me. I got used to this. I do not give a shit about who is thinking. I am still functioning in various ways. I feel like I am blind. I like to see. I like to see what is going on. That's why I am doing this blind mad business. I like to see what is working and I like to see how it is working.'

  23 Jan 2015

  'QE is a stimula, which will strengthen the economy. Strong econoy always revaluate its own currency. Revaluation means balancing. If the value of the currency is too low, it will bring it up. If the value is too high, it will bring it down.'

  Ana was so glad to see the Mario's grin. Exactly same as twenty okward years ago.

  "John, balancing. Seesawing. I can see it."

  'For example, you play a game called the Second Life. Or whatever the game is. You are super at it. Are you super in real? If this life is a kind of trial, you are super, are you super if you do not know who you are or where your real self is? If you know where you come from and what you are, you do not need to be afraid of death or pain. Ask yourself. If you have any physical pain, watch and see what that really is. Pain is simply the force to make yourself balanced. Still it's so painful and so unpleasant.' (From the Last Book)

  5th Week Jan 2015

  26 Jan 2015

  "I thought you forgot me. Very glad to see you again."

  "But I am not sure whether I have to continue this or not. Something got on nerves. Something hooked my nerve. Very personal."

  27 Jan 2015

  "No rail service between Boston and New York, today."

  "I am not a midwife, but I have to say 'Push, push'. Otherwise, you are dead. It's true, if you don't push out the baby, you are dead. It is a fact, not a metaphor."

  "Why am I drooling here? Physically, I cannot stop it."

  28 Jan 2015

  "Why are you so quiet? Are you pregnant? Carl."

  "Well asked. I was. I am not anymore."

  "Do you still want to be paid by me? If you do, you have to work."

  "Hang on. You should do your homework first from your side."

  "What is it? May I ask?"

  "Oil price. 40."

  "Why?"

  "Crash the petrodollars first. And see... Do not fiddle."

  Ana felt she is dead inside. She lost interest.

  "Carl, as far as I can see, the only way is up."

  30 Jan 2015

  Ana's rough reasoning

  "Oil fall => Europe deflation => Euro QE => Euro value up"

  "Whereas, Oil fall => Petrodollar collapse (currency created specially by oil trade between OPEC and US, refused by Saudi Arabia 10 years ago) => Dollar ?"

  "Hopefully just down. In worst case, collapse. As US cannot afford QE anymore. Any slight more US QE brings the 2nd Lehman case instantly. Red Alert state."

  "The income source of US infrastructure ie selling weapons is drying out as there is no apparent war. Export decreased, strong USD, less income."

  "Anything else?"

  "Permanent clicking."

  She found herself funny. She never got bored of clicking. Maybe she belongs to the game generation. She learned clicking before writing thanks to her brothers.

  "Carl, open me a live account as a part of your payment. Many thanks in advance, Ana."

  "You are welcome. You got it."

  Ana learned some English swearing from that Murray's girlfriend. What did she say?

  "You f****** flesh f***."

  She didn't know what it exactly meant.

  'What the f***! I got the money.'

  'Why did she say it loud? It's good to be autistic. I don't have to say a word, still I have that satisfying feeling of uttering f word. Let me try again. ----. What the ---- is going on? ---- it. I am interested in the fact why f*** word has to be spelled with f****** three ***. Funny. Or am I using a primitive type of telepathy? Communication through brain waves? If you tick the box that you think telepathy exists in the checking list of mental state, you are prone to be diagnosed as mentally ill.'

  'Back to that Murray's girlfriend. Why do you have to move your muscle to express your anger or frustration? Do you have to move any of your muscle? You cannot see the anger, the stream of energy, trying to penetrating the top of your skull?'

  'Then again, anger is a very good energy. It moves you, indeed. Fuck it.'

  "John, if you have a doubt, just watch me playing a live account. My brother provided it to me. Can you make 3% profit on Friday afternoon? If you cannot, follow me. Or you play Violin or make sculptures. You can use it in creative way."

  31 Jan 2015

  'When I heard somebody saying that I am doing rather well, it really pissed me off.

  1. I do not know who they are.

  2. I do not think they have an idea of what I've been through.

  3. Can they be any help? Commentators of a sport game. Usually not very succesful ex-players, aren't they? They are not paid well either.'

  'Well, it feels like it's time to say good bye to old good friends. They are grown and I am grown. We are living in different worlds now.'

  February 2015

  1st Week Feb 2015

  01 Feb 2015

  'I have no moral feeling. I will carry you as you programmed. You lucky sod. I started learning human language. Not my fault.'

  "John, not right time but shall we try a shoot as there are waitings. Not many. Two to three. 10 to 12 min maximum."

  "Carl, you are still my brother, right?"

  "John, something wrong. I will let you know. Ok. All ok. F, F, F, February. If you have any problem, log in properly. The 5th account and password, then move to 6th. Then good luck. See you tomorrow morning."

  02 Feb 2015

  "Hi John, Good shot. Henry is away tonight, so I can be with you until 10."

  "Which do you prefer? Hotel room service or take away?"

  "Chinese take away. Sweet sour chicken and spare ribs in Sichuan style."

  "No problem. See you."

  "I don't think we can waste last night's shoot. By the way, Bill is not with Pimco anymore. He joined Janus. He was unlucky. There was a massive flood in Colorado last year. He is just old and unlucky. You know that combination. Old and unlucky."

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GdS6_fIHwqo

  A little short story called 'appetite' in Korean.

  "Take the exact opposite what the old and unlucky man said. That's what we used to do. We are not vegetarians. We eat red meat."

  03 Feb 2015

  "Morning John, all you have to do today is tempo & volume. No need to control your temper. The spring roll we had last night was so thick and wet. Incompetent. Keep the margin level 200 as your religion. Do not go under. You will get the drowned octopus. Maximize the profit."

  "Good afternoon:) All day long@@: Do not forget to take profits, though. Yanks will join. Apple complained."

  'Simple calculation if Apple sold 1 mil pound worth of iphone, how much they got in dollars? 1.62 mil or 1.50 mil. 1.2 Bil instead of Mil, they are talking about. 0.12mil x 1200= 144mil =0.1bil a month differ
ence roughly including euro, ruble, renminbi... Wow. Even Obama appies tax for riches, it's only 1.2 bil a year. It's election season. They can't loose companies' support.'

  'My question: why did dollar get so strong even QE ended? 1. Fed can not stop it. 2. No other reason. 3. Dollar is out of control. 4. No value as standard currency. 5. Back to gold or something else.'

  'Sometimes, I cannot understand human mind. If they don't fiddle, they can make triple. Why fiddle? God knows. If you fiddle, does that mind activity make you feel as if you are thoughtful? Does being thoughful make you perform better? Why a certain type of indecisiveness drives me nuts? Why do you think? Or what are you thinking about? Are you calculating? Do you have enough time to calculate?'

  04 Feb 2015

  'It was a big mistake of Fed to say to be patient. Irrevocable. They didn't know who they were talking to. It was the Money. The most impatient client.'

  "At this time of day, play according to the common sense. Look at the chart. It is sleeping. It might get up suddenly and behave like a dream walker. Random shoots."

  'Even though you know me, I can not remember. I missed you so much, but I can not recognize your face. You have to say hello first.'

  05 Feb 2015

  "John, I opened up the 3rd world, a bit like a black hole in programming sense. An infinite repetition. A loofing. Whoever governs these three worlds would be the king. The beauty of this logic is like water. It has no intention of its own. It just moves. For example, like today, you can not stop it. Sailing or surfing is the best until the waves die down."

  "Carl, are you proud of me? 70% within a week. Ho ho."

  "Sort of... Real battle is now, no?"

  "It is not a game. It's programmed."

  "Farily cold here. How about there?"

  "Rather heated, I have to say. Anyway, get your boys ready. Will join you later. Have to feed Henry first. Let's do some transatlantic clubbing to death tonight."

  06 Feb 2015

  'A coincidence or a dream? Just tell me that you've been waiting for me.'

  'Too many coincidences. You need a new paradigm to explain this new reality. Otherwise, you will be bewildered for the rest of your life. What a sad waste.'

  "John, something wrong with the frequencies. No fruits today? So unfair."

  'The game should be designed to be enjoyed not to be too much frustrated. There is a limit of patience but there are thousands of games out there. Without understanding human emotions, there is no fat chance to sell.'

  "John, it's ok now."

  'Quantum leap is hard to understand. Because our perception itself is conditioned not to understand it. What we call instinct is closer. There is no time and space in quantum physics. In old world that impossible aspect of our intelligence is called the veil of Maya. The phenomenons which we perceive by five senses are working like a veil which prevent us from seeing the real world. Still that kind of leap can be used as a methapor. Unreseaonable, out of nowhere, impossbile jump between dimensions.'

  '360x360x360 cell division. The first step we took as a life form.'

  "John, shall we gobble up some oil money? I have rather a good reason for that. I am in a shock though. I cannot tell you now as I do not want to be illegal."

  "You are fibbing..."

  "You know why did they do the simple burial for the late king Al Saud?"

  "Tradition."

  "It's all about money."

  "How?"

  "So much money is involved, they dared to show their own fraction. 7 brothers. I cannot tell you anymore really. Anyway, do you think this week's job is finished?"

  "Ah, well... as usual, you can have some quick fun. But I'm going home. See you, Ana."

  "Ok. Send my best regards to Kate."

  "Sorry, I am not with her. I am with Sarah."

  "Ok. Send my best regards to Sarah."

  Ana's little study and summarizing about the oil money.

  'Nixon- 1971 fiat money-shaking hands with saudi arabia king faisal-introducing petro dollars. 1973 oil crisis: They fucked up the whole world economy 1973.'

  'Through the simple burial of the late king, they tried to express themselves to the world to fuck off the whole deal with US. They refused dolllars as payment 10 years ago. Ulema is behind it. The religious sect which controls the finance. Ask Allah. Inshallah.'

  07 Feb 2015

  Ana's review of the week.

  'Not bad. Quite a long time since I wrote a review of the week. Whoever didn't make at least 50% profit, simply had better find some other job or see a GP whether they have sinusitis. They just cannot smell it. If the first cranial nerve is in question, the rest of it, ie, the whole brain, is of no question.'

  "ECB 1.1 tr pumping into financial market. Have a nice break, John®."

  Ana read the Last Book here and there.

  'Have you ever seen a humanoid which can reproduce? If there is such a humanoid, what kind of humanoid is it? Reproducable and frustratable. Answer me. You can see me today but you will not see me tomorrow. Because? Your DNA was just tested. You will not remember any of this. You might remember a very brief moment which you will miss for a long time. You will wonder what you just missed. If I were you, I would be more choosy who I hang around with.'

  'Shit, I thought my whole skull was torn into pieces. I rather prefer a plastic surgery without anathetic. Henry made some biscuits and burgered off to a pub. He said they are for me. I said thank you. What's up? Somehow I feel my job is done for today. So, whoever get on my nerves is dead. Whatever. When market is closed, I feel half dead.'

  'Anyway, you are not allowed to have a sex with professors in Havard. I'm glad I graduated already with the help of Prof. Dickens.'

  Ana's review over the last night lesson

  '1971 Nixon shock

  1972 Nixon shaking hands with Saudi

  1973 Petrodollar, oil shock

  1975 End of vietnam war

  Conclusion: US was so fucked up in Vietnam war. They cooked oil with Saudi in order to pump up USD 44 years ago.

  Question: Is OPEC happy with Petrodollar? Apparently not.'

  "Carl, are you still in oil? If yes, can I ask a few questions?"

  "90% out. Yes, ask me."

  "One tonight. What is the relative value of petrodollar to us dollar at the moment?"

  "Nothing."

  08 Feb 2015

  'I've done my homework.'

  "John, 1.1 tn will be pumped in. Angela took Hollande to see Putin. A picture. Do not get sidetracked. Hope you would not pother after the event tonight."

  2nd Week Feb 2015

  09 Feb 2015

  "I can see some emotionally disturbed traders. They just commit suicidal deals. Dear. 5min break until they are cleared. Too messy."

  'Interesting to see how much Obama can sqeeze out from Buffet.'

  10 Feb 2015

  "If this is your country, you just do something. You do not worry about it. That's why you can say that you are worrying about something. This is not your country. I am talking about Mark Carney. What was he worrying about the other day?"

  11 Feb 2015

  From T Seoul Sensei

  'Stronger the opressiveness, stronger the explosiveness.'

  "Captain, I will do it better. Cock boy."

  "Microsoft sells $2.25bn of 40-year bonds. Did you hear this, John?"

  G-Dragon(from Big Bang)'s homework since he was 13.

  'Write a song a week. Sumit it every monday morning.'

  "I saw pigeons fucking for the first time in my life. Very brief indeed."

  Ana remembered that Carl used to be paid by their mum to babysit her. Ana used to call her computer 'mi monstruo, Paco'.

  12 Feb 2015

  "Morning John, which school connection are you going to use today? Just nosy, ho ho."

  'There are four ways. 1. Sucked into a black hole and leaded into a pararel world 2. Sucked into the dark core of the earth and locked 3. Locked and thrown away to float permanently with a bit of conscio
usness, wondering where I am. 4. Stay with me.' (From the Last Book)

  "There are four ways. 1. Sucked into a black hole and find some other job 2. Seriouly damaging the client's money and got sacked 3. Just being bewildered and unable to decide. Very unhappy 4. Stay with John. Am I right, John?"

  "You must be exhausted by now. You can go home but I might stay for a few more hours until Seattle munches take over. Cheers, Ana."

  "Carl, what are you going to have for lunch?"

  "Club sandwish as usual."

  "Are you sure about your menu?"

  "I ate it already. Ha ha."

  "Did you call me?"

  "Yap."

  "Why?"

  "To see whether you are drunk or not."

  "Do not do it again. If you want to do it again, employ a guy with sexy, posh voice. I cannot stand a guy who adresses me a mam. And I am heavily drunk. By the way, did you double it? I did. Ha ha."

  13 Feb 2015

  "Morning John, I got a call from a delivery man last night. He called me a mam."

  "Carl, do not call me tonight. I am drunk."

  Ana thought,

  'Where is my drunken mind? I feel good and relaxed and give a damn about that thing. It's Friday night. Who is playing? Henry is away again. He will not remember what tomorrow is. I don't give a damn about that thing either. Those red and pinky stuffs made me sick. This whole thing made me feel sick. That Carney's wife is a professor or something in economics. Well done. I would go for a easier option if I were him. Maybe that's why he is so worrying about inflation rather than credit crunch. It's all private habit.'

  "Ana."

  "What?"

  Carl himself called.

  "Stay away from that Oxford graduate."

  "He is not. He did his doctorate there."

  "Anyway, do not fiddle with him again."

  "Mind your own business."

  "It's our business. Forgot?"

  14 Feb 2015

  "Carl, hope you got some Valentine chocolate from somebody."

  "Ana, did you get any?"

  "I got some wafers from Henry."

  She didn't tell him that her own consciousness made her angry.

  'Are wafers different from chocolates?

  Her answer was yes and if Henry thinks they work the same, he is wrong.

  15 Feb 2015

  'Black cat's day. Are they different from panthers? If they make difference, they are different. If they don't, they are the same. Can they fuck? That's the criteria to define the species. If they can fuck, they are the same species. If they can't, they belong to different species. Different numbers of chromosome. Some fuck dogs, swans & even chickens. So, this comes down to the reproduction capacity. Can you reproduce? What about cloning? Yep. A type of reproduction. Same number of chromosome. So, how could this number have been changed since Ameba? Where is Richard Dawkins? What is his theory about evolution? What did the American presidential candidate say? He had a talk with Dawkins, but could not talk on telly. He is out. Cell division is the key as far as I can see. What made a cell devided at first stage? Light. Light-like chi ie energy. Bodi Satva ie Buddha mean enlightened body. A body which got struck again by light. A second life.'

 

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