by Cube Kid
I wonder, she thought. Can I bring a cow into the Nether?
She bent down and picked up the two kittens, one in each arm, then took them into her hut and laid them on her mat.
Of course, she wasn’t surprised when she examined them.
Like Eeebs,
both kittens had the mark.
Meow?
Okay. There we go. I finally figured it out.
Apparently, I needed to use
a chicken feather, not my paws.
So, where do I begin? My name is Eeebs. I’m a kitten. Well, sort of. I’m a little different, nowadays.
What happened? I still don’t know completely. I was just trying to get away from those wolves. Then I found that nether portal.…
After I stepped through, I began changing. I found that I could run faster, jump higher. Even turn slightly invisible. This witch I met said I could even gain the abilities of monsters.
Plus, I’m way smarter than I used to be. After all, kittens don’t typically have diaries.
The witch said there’s a reason why all of this happened. I’ve been “chosen” to help save the world. There’s this huge army of monsters, and they want to take over all three dimensions.
Of course, I’m supposed to help stop them. Me. A kitten. I find that hard to believe.
The only thing I’ve ever been good at is chasing bats around. I’m pretty sure there’s a lot more to saving the world than that.
Anyway, for now I’m putting all that aside. You see, during my time in the Nether, I also made a friend: Clyde.
He’s a ghast. He taught me a lot of things about his world. But then, the witch said he took off to join that army.
My best buddy, siding with the enemy? Clyde would never do that! And if he did, it must have been for a very good reason. Maybe he’s spying on them. Or maybe they forced him.
In the end, it doesn’t matter why he left. I have to go find him.
The witch said that Clyde took off to this place called a nether forest. Was she joking around with me? I don’t think the Nether even has forests.
I’ve been searching for hours
and haven’t found a single tree.
I searched around the Nether some more.
At first, all I found were mushrooms, glowstone, and a lot of zombie pigmen.
Then I saw a weird creature. He was stranded in the middle of a lava lake, balancing on a single block of netherrack.
The Nether is full of strange stuff, but I’ve never seen anything like it before. I just had to see what he was doing there.
But as I got closer, I noticed that this creature looked unfriendly. Dangerous, even. He was made of bones and was carrying one of those sharp things the pigmen always have on them.
Just as I turned away, he shouted:
“Hey! Don’t leave, huh?! I really need some help over here!”
My curiosity got the best of me. I turned back and approached the lava.
“How can I help?” I called out, stepping to the lake’s edge. “I can’t swim in lava.”
“Sure you can,” he said. “You won’t burn up! Just hop in, float over here, and give me a ride! Wait …you are a magma cube, aren’t you?”
“Actually, I’m not.”
The creature leaned forward slightly, as if taking a better look. “Oh, sorry! My vision’s not the best these days. Well, if you’re not a magma cube, what are you, then?”
His question totally threw me off guard.
How could someone not know a kitten when they see one? Even one such as myself …
“What do you mean, what am I?!” I hissed. “What are you?!”
The bony figure whirled around, apparently just as shocked. “What? Haven’t you ever seen a wither skeleton before?!”
“I have,” I said. “But only a few times, and I never knew what you guys were called. I’m from the Overworld. Long story.”
“Right. Some other time.” The so-called skeleton paused. “Got a name?”
“Eeebs. You?”
“Batwing.” He glanced around. “Well, Eeebs from the Overworld, how about we help each other out?”
“Assuming I even could get you out of there,” I said, “what would you do for me?”
The skeleton laughed. “Simple. You need a guide. You’re clearly lost. I mean, if you knew anything about this place, you wouldn’t be going that way. No, anywhere but that way.”
I glanced in the direction I’d been heading earlier.
All I could see were netherrack hills, nether quartz veins, and lavafalls.
“It doesn’t look so bad,” I said, pretending not to care. But again, my curiosity soon took hold. “What’s over there, anyway?”
“More of my kind,” Batwing said, “plus a whole lot of blazes. And none of them are as nice as me. Believe me, fuzz block, the last place you want to be going to is a nether fortress.”
My ears perked up. Nether fortress …?
So that explained why I never found any trees. I thought the witch had said nether forest, but I must have misheard.
This whole language thing is still new to me. I could speak with other cats before, yes, but my conversations with other creatures were …very limited. The only non-cat word I knew before this change was “grr,” which is wolf for “I’m going to eat you now.”
After realizing what the skeleton had said, I was so excited that I stepped to the very edge of the lake and nearly slipped off.
“A nether fortress?! That’s exactly where I need to go! My friend went there! I need to save him!”
“You’ve got to be kidding me.…” The wither skeleton lowered his head. “And here I thought it was my lucky day.…”
“The deal’s still on, right?”
The skeleton shook his head. “No. No deal. No way am I going there.”
“Fine.” I turned around. “Then I’ll just have to go there myself. See you around!”
“N-no, w-wait!” the skeleton called out. “Okay! You win! Just get me off this rock, and I’ll take you anywhere you want to go.”
I nodded. “What do I do?”
“That’s easy. Since you can’t swim, you’re going to be building a bridge.”
Bridge? Another word I didn’t know. Clyde had taught me a lot of words, but he’d never mentioned anything about bridges.
“A what?”
“Seriously? They don’t have bridges in the Overworld, either?”
“Maybe they do, but I’ve never heard of them. Also, what’s ‘building’?”
Batwing grumbled to himself. “Never mind. I’ll walk you through it. You don’t happen to have any tools, do you?”
My confusion only grew. “Tools?”
More grumbling from my new friend. He glanced downward, particularly at my paws. Then he chuckled.
“Y’know, actually, I think we can make this work.”
“Come on! Punch!”
A skeleton named Batwing, surrounded by lava, shouted these words at me. It’s been a weird couple of days.
Still near the shore, I stared down at the reddish netherrack beneath my paws. “So, I just hit it? Like this?”
“Exactly! But harder!”
I threw a real punch this time.
Cracks formed where my paw struck the ground. Only, they vanished as quickly as they had appeared.
“Don’t stop!” Batwing called out. “Just keep punching!”
“Seems a little weird.”
“It’s not! It’s what you have to do when you don’t have any tools!”
“Right.” More punching.
My paws hammered away at a block of netherrack.
I didn’t let up this time—just kept punching away. The cracks grew larger and larger, until finally the block cam
e loose. I pulled it out without too much effort.
It wasn’t as heavy as I’d expected.
Batwing seemed pleased. “That’s it! Now, just place it over by the edge there!”
I did as he instructed. Since I was holding the block with my front paws, I had to stand upward on my hind legs.
I was walking. Just like a zombie pigman. Only not as fast. Hobbling over, I shoved the block against the edge of the shore. Strangely, as if by magic, the block snapped into place.
I’d never known that it was possible to change the environment like this. Truly, I understood nothing about the rules of this world. (Even if I am smarter than the average kitten, I still have a lot to learn.)
“Great work so far!” Batwing said. “Now, do it five more times!”
I glanced at the lava between us. Suddenly, it all made sense.
If I placed enough blocks, a row of netherrack would be formed across the lava, a so-called “bridge.” (Gosh, these monsters and their fancy words!)
Punch, punch.
I moved a second block. A third.
Finally, after I placed the sixth, Batwing jumped so high it was almost as if he could have cleared the lava without a bridge at all.
Then he zoomed to safety, stopped, spun around, and jumped again. “Oh, man! I can’t believe this! You don’t know how thankful I am, kitten! I was trapped there for weeks!”
“Now that you mention it,” I said, walking up to him, “exactly how did you wind up there?”
Batwing looked away. “Those animals! They put me there! After I told them we shouldn’t be attacking the Overworld!”
“Who’s ‘they’?”
Then it hit me. “You mean you were part of that army?”
“Yes. Was. I couldn’t go along with everything they were doing. That enderman is crazy.”
I knew he must have been talking about EnderStar—an enderman so bad his own kind actually kicked him out of the End.
“By the way,” Batwing went on, “you should know that not everyone in the Nether is bad. Like my friends. I’d like to introduce you to them.”
“That’s fine,” I said. “But first . . .”
“Yeah, yeah, I know. We’ll find your friend. But let’s get one thing straight first.”
“What’s that?”
“I’ll do all the talking.”
We finally reached the fortress.
I’d never seen anything so big—just block after block of nether brick.
Another so-called “bridge” spanned a wide chasm filled with more orange fire water. A wither skeleton was standing guard there.
“That’s Wishbone,” Batwing whispered. “Not too smart, but an all right kind of guy. Just follow me and don’t say anything. Actually, wait. Make a hissing sound. Can you do that?”
I hissed. “Like this?”
“Kind of. But more like smoldering magma or something.”
“Magma?”
Batwing facepalmed. “Dude. You have seen a magma cube before, right?”
“Maybe? I don’t know?”
“Whatever. After we go up to him, just start hissing.”
“Okay.”
Batwing walked up to the wither skeleton, and I followed.
“I never thought you’d make it off that block,” Wishbone said, “with your fear of swimming and all. Anyway, the boss said you aren’t exactly welcome here anymore.”
“That’s fine.” Batwing pointed at me. “I just wanted to show the boss this, and then I’ll be on my way.”
“Huh? What’s that?”
“A very rare type of magma cube,” Batwing said. “Might be useful for the army.”
Wishbone approached me. “Doesn’t look like any magma cube I’ve ever seen. Aren’t they supposed to look like, um, you know, magma?”
Batwing shook his head. “As I said, this is an extremely rare type. And very powerful, I might add.” He glanced at me. “Plus, it hisses, just like any magma cube.”
Oh. Right.
I hissed as loud as I could.
“What kind of sound is that?!” Wishbone said. “Listen, it doesn’t sound like a magma cube at all, and why is it blue?”
Batwing sighed. “You’re making fun of a poor little magma cube because he’s blue, are you? You know the boss doesn’t like such discrimination!”
“N-no,” Wishbone said. “I—”
Batwing shook his fist, seemingly angry. “So he’s blue! So what?! Do you know how many monsters have made fun of him for this?”
“I was just joking!”
“Clearly! A joke at his expense!”
“I’m sorry! Please come in! Don’t tell anyone I said that!”
“Fine. And don’t tell anyone we’re here,” Batwing said. “I want EnderStar to be surprised when he sees his new gift.”
“Y-yeah, okay, okay.” Wishbone looked at me. “Sorry, man. Blue magma cubes are totally cool, all right? Even blue magma cubes with legs!”
“Hissss?! Hisss! Hiss-hiss-hiss!!”
“I said I’m sorry!” He stepped backward and made a wide gesture. “Come on in.”
With that, we walked past him and stepped inside the fortress.
“You’re probably wondering why that guy was so afraid,” Batwing said once we were out of earshot. “From what I’ve heard, EnderStar was picked on as a kid because his eyes glowed too brightly.”
“I certainly know how it feels,” I said. “So, any monster under his command who makes fun of another’s appearance is punished?”
“Yeah. Something like that.”
As we wandered farther inside, I began to realize just how huge the nether fortress was: Endless halls stretched for hundreds of blocks.
There were so many monsters here, too. I’d seen most of them before. Batwing told me the angry fire things, floating in the air, were called blazes. More wither skeletons marched in groups, along with zombie pigmen. I even saw a few ghasts floating around in the larger chambers. Sadly, none of them were Clyde.
Another wither skeleton soon stopped and questioned me:
“Hey! You there! What are you, exactly? You’re the strangest-looking monster I’ve ever seen!”
“I am Lord Sizzleblock,” I said, “Royal Magma Cube from the Overworld. EnderStar has asked me to pay him a visit. And you are?”
“Yes, let us know your name,” Batwing said, “so that the noble Lord Sizzleblock can inform the great and powerful EnderStar of such discrimination and—”
The skeleton fell to his knees and bowed so deeply he all but kissed the nether brick floor. “Forgive me at once, Your Majesty! I simply didn’t know that your kind came in such lovely shades of blue! How many times do you want me to bow?”
“Fifty should be enough,” I said.
“Of course, my lord!”
Every time a monster questioned us, it went pretty much like that.
Once, a zombie pigman grunted at us. “Urg! Who you? Why you here?” He looked closer. “Urguu?! What you are?!”
Batwing pointed his sharp stick at the zombified pigman. “How dare you address the grand and majestic King Flamepixel with such insolence! He visits upon EnderStar’s request, who shall be notified of your—”
The zombie pigman didn’t apologize.
Instead, he ran off the nearby edge of the fortress—without jumping, just kind of tipping over—and fell into the lava far below. The way he dropped off instead of jumping …it was like he wanted to reach the lava as fast as zombie pigman–ly possible, to the millisecond.
“Wow,” I said. “Um …that was a pretty extreme reaction, no? They must really fear EnderStar.”
Seconds later, a blaze appeared. “Gzzzzt?! Www-w-what?! Bgzzzt!! A-a-are?! Gzrrg!! Y-y-ou …?!”
I stepped forward, abo
ut to say something. I didn’t need to, though. Not this time. The blaze was very confused by the sight of me. So bewildered, in fact, that it began trembling in the air, made a weird sputtering noise, and flew off while spinning around and gurgling—its direction and angle changing randomly as it did.
I watched the blaze disappear into the gloom overhead. “Do I really look that weird?” The sputtering sound eventually faded completely.
Then I heard a voice in the distance.
“Eeebs?!”
There he was, gliding through the air.
“Clyde! What are you doing here?! I’ve been looking everywhere for you!”
“Oh, Eeebs. I’m so sorry. I . . .”
“Did you really join their army?”
“Yes,” he said. “But I only joined because I was looking for you, too! I didn’t know how to go to the Overworld and was too scared to go there alone.”
I felt so relieved. Of course. I knew Clyde wouldn’t actually join them.
“We have to get out of here,” I said. “Everyone keeps freaking out when they see me.”
Clyde nodded. “I’ll say! A blaze just flew past me, upside down!”
We heard a faint boom off in the distance, as though the blaze had crashed into a wall and exploded.
Batwing winced. “Poor guy. Anyway, let’s get out of here. More monsters will show up any minute.”
“He’s right,” Clyde said. “Let’s go.”
Long story short, I finally caught up with Clyde again. We made it out of the nether fortress without much trouble.
“The Overworld is in danger,” Clyde said, once we were in the clear. “EnderStar is gearing up for something big. Much bigger than we thought. Not even the Nether will be safe.”
“About that,” Batwing said. “You two seem like cool mobs. I’d like to introduce you to my friends.”