“Psshh.” He set down the dagger and waved toward the gate. “I trust you, Benny. Was ordered to by your mum. Said if you ever showed up to let you in. Good to see you, lass. Go on in.”
Benny held Radamar's hand as they walked ahead of the others on the landscaped path. Palm trees rustled in the light, cool breeze and parrots called from artificial perches. Somewhere behind an ivy-covered trellis, a fountain bubbled and a stream gurgled. She remembered splashing in that stream as a child, and how the gardener told her not to because it would disturb the goldfish in the pond it emptied into. From a nearby lamp post, a blue parrot cawed the South Isle Orcan equivalent of “Sard off!” Benny couldn't help but grin at the little details Urzal had added to turn the manor into a home.
“You're trembling,” Radamar whispered, squeezing her hand.
“So are you.” She glanced at a sculpture of the sea goddess Brezva holding up the severed head of an elven man. “That's new.”
“Your mother and her wife certainly have interesting taste.”
The flowering bushes lining the stone path opened to stairs and a sprawling manor. Torches threw firelight upon glass mosaics and potted topiaries. They simultaneously took a deep breath as they approached the cherry wood door.
Benny slowly lifted the water dragon door knocker, then let it drop.
She had expected one of the staff to answer, but instead she found herself looking up at her stepmother.
“Hi, Urzal,” Benny said, backing up a step so she didn't have to look up to see Urzal's face.
The orc raised a thick, black eyebrow, then rubbed a tusk between her heavy fingers. She scowled at Radamar and said, “Your mum told this boy not to come back without you, and it looks like he made good on his promise.” She stared past them at their companions. “What in the world have you brought with you? A dragon, a couple strays, and . . . that you, Mordegan Vale?”
“Hi, Bladestorm,” Mordegan said, waving. “Long journey to get here, thought she could use some help.”
“That it is, if you come by land. As I'm sure you did since your dainty ass won't get on a real ship. I told you twenty years ago that the seasickness will pass if you give it a chance, but you won't even try.”
“Heh. It's not the seasickness. It's the creatures of the deep.”
“Damn it, Mordegan.
“Damn yourself, Bladestorm.”
They glared at each other for a moment before the tension in their faces relaxed into smiles. Urzal laughed and said, “Well, come on in then. You lot can wait in the foyer while I go fetch Berra.”
Benny stepped into a home of blue and green tapestries and black pearl granite. Fragrant fresh flowers in sand-washed vases decorated cherry wood tables, and a stone fountain topped with a hedolar crushing a ship sat in front to an ornate staircase.
“Little different from my rickety house in the Jade, isn't it, Sealash?” Mordegan said with a laugh.
“Your house was nice,” Iefyr replied. He looked up at the shell-spangled chandelier. “This is something . . . different. Benny, did you really grow up here?”
“Sometimes, but I think I spent more time on the ship and at Dad's house than here.” Benny held her hand to her mouth and gasped as a middle-aged sea elf ran down the stairs. Berra's green eyes were bright in the brown of her face, and her often-wild curls were tied into a thick knot of dark brown streaked with silver and sun-bleached gold.
«You're alive. I knew you were alive.» Berra's hands flashed before she embraced Benny.
Benny squeezed her, kissed her cheek, then backed up to sign, «I'm so sorry.»
Berra reached out and pushed Benny's hand down. «You are here. You are alive.» She clicked her tongue and nodded at Radamar. «I told him not to come back without you. He found you?»
«Dad found me first.»
Berra grinned as she ran to Mordegan. She grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him down into a rough kiss, then released him and grinned again. «Hello again, sexy beast.»
Mordegan's nose twitched as he smiled at her. «Hello again, feisty sea mage. Took me a while, but I wasn't about to let our girl stay lost.»
Benny approached Berra and made sure she had her attention before signing, «Where is Radella?»
«I love you so much.» Tears of elation gathered in Berra's eyes as she stroked Benny's face. She lowered her hands, then frowned as her eyes fell upon Benny's injured hand. «What happened? Where is your finger?»
«Doesn't matter right now. Where is my daughter?»
«Benny, it's almost midnight. She's asleep. I'll take you up to look in on her once you tell me who all these men with you are.»
Benny spoke as she spelled out the names. “Captain Elsin Sylleth. Moonlight Regiment, not a ship Captain. Iefyr Sealash. Juna. You've already met my husband, Radamar.”
«The man so desperate to protect his child that he teleported into my living room and scared the shit out of me.» Berra scrutinized Radamar with such intensity that Benny wondered if the decapitated head on the yard sculpture was supposed to be him. «Is he okay?»
«He's kind of amazing and I seem to have fallen in love with him.» Benny exchanged fond looks with Radamar. «He signs almost as well as Dad does, so watch what you say around him.»
«I know. We spoke when he brought her here.» Berra nodded at Juna. «Is this one an elf, too?»
Benny took a step toward Juna. “Take off your hood, Juna. She needs to see you and watch you speak or she won't trust you. She reads lips well.”
He took off his hood and goggles, revealing his large, luminescent red-brown eyes, coppery skin, and shiny black hair. It had been a while since Benny had seen his face fully exposed and she had forgotten how startling his appearance was to someone unfamiliar with Uldru.
«My gods, what are you?» Berra asked, her eyes wide and confused.
“She asked what you are,” Benny said.
“I am Uldru,” Juna replied.
Berra shook her head after watching Benny spell out the word. «What is that?»
Benny bared her teeth. This had already gone on too long. «I'll explain later, or Dad will. I want to see my daughter. Now.»
«Please. We haven't seen her in too long,» Radamar added.
Berra sputtered her lips and nodded. «Try not to wake her. She knows who you are because I talk to her about you, but she might not recognize you and it will scare her to see you hovering above her in the middle of the night. I'll take you to look in on her, and we'll have proper re-introductions in the morning. Is that satisfactory?»
Tears fell down Benny's cheeks. «Yes.»
Berra cocked her head toward Mordegan. «Hey, love. Kitchen is to the left. Urzal can show you. Help yourselves. I'll take them up to see their girl, and then we can make some room arrangements. You're all staying here as long as you need and I won't argue about that.» She tapped Benny's forearm twice and pointed toward the stairs. «Come on. It's damned good to have you back home.»
«Love you, Mom.»
«I know, baby. Don't worry about the past. It's over with now. Come see your baby and step forward. We'll figure out the rest later once you tell me where you've been.»
Radamar grasped Benny's hand and repeatedly squeezed it as they followed Berra up the stairs and down a corridor. Familiar tapestries hung from the painted walls and a cushy rug sank underfoot. She had always been comfortable here, but this was the first time she had looked around and thought home.
“You're breathing too fast,” Radamar said.
“So are you,” Benny replied.
She ran her fingertips along the chipped edge of a narrow table. She had caused the chipping herself during a fit of childhood anger. She let her hand drop from the corner and looked back. There were her initials, clearly carved into one of the legs. Despite claiming for years she would do something about the damage, her mother had never repaired or replaced it.
Radamar bumped her side. “We need to talk later. With Iefyr. None of us will be tired enough to sleep
for a while, so it might as well be tonight.”
“I've seen you two in deep conversation several times recently. Is this about me?” This corridor was longer than she remembered. Or, maybe time was stretching into the infinite in anticipation of seeing Radella.
“It's about all of us. I told him what Ranalae did to me.”
“Oh, honey. Why?”
“Because I love you. And I love him. So do you. I don't need anyone else to know what was done to me, just you two.”
“Does that mean you're ready to show me?” Benny asked.
“No, but I need to.” He sighed and lowered his chin toward his chest. “I wish it hadn't taken losing almost everything to figure out who I am and who I love.”
Berra reached the door at the end of the hall and turned around. «I know you're excited, but try not to wake her. She was difficult to get into bed tonight.»
She opened the door to a chamber of moonlight and sheepskin rugs. Murals of seahorses and tropical fish covered the walls and the painted stars on the black ceiling mimicked the night sky outside. This was the bedroom of Benny's childhood, a repository of memories and comfort.
She slowly approached the pale green canopy of the four-poster bed. The sheer fabric rustled as a warm breeze drifted in from an open window. A small child lay on her side, her back toward the door. Her sandy hair rested in loose waves on her pillow.
Radamar reached the far side of the bed first. He knelt next to the mattress and sniffled as tears fell upon the quilt. He looked up at Benny, then beckoned. “Come here.”
Trembling and with a heart beating faster than the wings of a hummingbird, she walked around the foot of the bed and knelt next to Radamar.
She barely recognized her own child. And she was a child now, not a toddler, a chubby and healthy child with lightly freckled cheeks and long, dark eyelashes. Her full lips parted, then pursed as her eyelids twitched through a dream. She was perfect and beautiful and it took every bit of Benny's restraint not to pick her up and cover her in kisses.
Weeping, Benny leaned against Radamar's shoulder. “She still looks like you.”
He rubbed his eye, then rested his elbow on the edge of the bed. “Sorry.”
“That's not something to be sorry for. She's beautiful. I want nothing more than to climb up on this bed and cuddle her, but it would terrify her to wake in the arms of a stranger.”
“You're not a stranger. You never have been.”
Radella's feet kicked beneath the blanket. She smacked her lips together, then opened her eyes just enough for the moonlight to catch the brown of her irises. She tensed, then smiled as she reached forward to wipe a tear from Radamar's face.
«Hi, Daddy,» she signed.
«Hi, Radella,» he returned, his hands shaking.
With sleepy eyes and sleepier hands, she stared at Benny. «Is this my Mommy?»
He stood and kissed her brow. «Yes. We have Mommy again. Go back to sleep, my love. We'll still be here in the morning, and for every morning after that.»
«Okay.» Radella folded her hands together and closed her eyes.
“She remembers me,” Radamar whispered with a smile. “And she knows who you are. No more fear, Benny. Let's let her sleep.”
Benny let her tears flow as she turned toward her mother and said, «Thank you. For everything. For taking care of her when I couldn't.»
Berra embraced her, then smiled and said, «She's my only granddaughter and I adore her. I'd like a couple more, so you two better get on that immediately.»
Radamar's posture tensed.
«Not now, Mom.» Reluctantly, Benny stepped away from Radella's bed. She wanted to spend the rest of the night sitting on the floor watching her daughter, but they had already woken her up once. She put her arm around Radamar and kissed his cheek, then released him to continue. «We've been traveling for months. I think we need to get something to eat and then rest. I don't think any of us will be able to fall asleep for a couple hours since we've been nocturnal, but Dad and Juna are driving me crazy, so...» She winced and let her hands drop to her sides.
«Let me see if I can find anything to help with your pain,» Berra said. She gazed fondly at Benny as she backed toward the door. «And for Brezva's sake, speak aloud if your hand can't take it. I can read your lips just fine. The others, the ones with accents, those are more difficult, but not you.»
“Thank you,” Benny said, trying not to grit her teeth.
Berra touched the back of her hand to Benny's cheek. «Baby, whatever happened to you, you're safe now. Why don't you two take the bedroom next to this one? I'll have your father tell me what happened.»
“Go relax. I'll find some food and bring it up,” Radamar said.
Tears again welled in her eyes as Benny looked back at Radella's peaceful form. She would have to wait until morning to hold her in her arms, but they were together again. Tonight was a new beginning for them, for all of them, and those who were still awake needed to make the most of it. Benny turned toward Radamar so Berra couldn't see her lips. “Bring Iefyr, too. He's afraid we've been teasing him. Let's show him we're not.”
BENNY CAREFULLY UNWOUND the dressing from her hand, then dabbed the sutures with clean water from the faucet. Everything was still swollen, but the color was improving and the wound itself was knitting together nicely. She traced the tattooing on the back of her hand with her opposite fingers, then applied the medicinal salve and redressed it.
“Let me help you with that. You're shaking.” Iefyr's Pearl Realm brogue slipped under the closed door and reached her ears as a soothing touch. “Why are you shaking?”
“I'm about to do something terrifying.” Radamar's voice was little more than a whisper. He opened the door and offered Benny a weary smile. “We have oranges, bean spread, some sort of fish, bread, and something called guava.”
“Guava is delicious.” Benny set down the extra dressing material and moved away from the basin.
“I don't recognize even half the foods in her kitchen,” Iefyr said as he set down a tray on a low table between two teal and gray settees. Auna dashed by him to let herself onto the balcony. She hopped onto a low lounge chair, then curled into a tight ball and closed her eyes. “How does your hand look?”
“Like something is missing,” Benny said. She raised her arm and wiggled her remaining fingers. “More swollen, though that is probably from talking to my mother. No sign of infection. Hurts like nothing else if I forget and try to pick something up with it.”
“It might for a while.” Iefyr sat on the floor and helped himself to an orange. “Mordegan is downstairs explaining everything to your mother.”
“Good. I think it's easier that way. There would be a lot more tears if I tried to tell her.” Benny sat to Iefyr's left. She put her arm around his back and rested her head on his shoulder. Across the room, Radamar was nearly hyperventilating as he stared out the window at the crashing waves.
Iefyr finished chewing his orange segment, then set the rest of the fruit on the tray and looked away. “I don't know what to do with my heart right now. You two keep trying to draw me closer. And I want to be close, but I can't quite figure out if you're doing this to mock me or if you're sincere.”
Benny slowly ran her hand up his spine until it rested in his shaggy red hair. She breathed deeply, then kissed his lips. The effervescent taste of oranges lingered on her tongue as she whispered, “I've wanted to do that since I was fourteen years old.”
He closed his eyes and leaned into her. “Only a week for me. Is that how long it's been? A week? Ten days?”
“Long enough for us to know what we want.”
He kissed her temple, then nuzzled the point of her ear. “I want both of you.”
“And we both want you.” Benny held up her arm and welcomed Radamar into their embrace. “We're afraid, though. Not of the unconventionality of this because it feels right, but of what you'll think when you see us.”
Radamar relaxed as Iefyr kissed him, but ten
sed as soon as he pulled away.
Iefyr put an arm around each of them and held them close. “I've seen enough of Shan Goldtree's body to have an idea of what was done to you, Benny. And Radamar . . . you were vague in our earlier conversation, but I understood. Did Ranalae take everything from you?”
“No. She thought completely emasculating me would kill me. She did other things too, though. She carved words into my flesh while whispering in my ear that I was her little gelding and she loved to hear me scream.” Radamar's words were muffled by Iefyr's shoulder, but the sharpness of them brought tears to Benny's eyes.
She kissed him, then pressed her brow against his. “You came to me so certain I'd reject you for what happened to you. I'm holding you close instead. I never thought I'd love you like I do now. Everything you did for our daughter, and for me. We'll never have the children together we wanted, but we have each other and Radella. And I think we have Iefyr now, too.”
“I want to be part of this family,” Iefyr said. He kissed Radamar's hair and stroked his back.
Radamar looked up at him and smiled. “I can't father any more children, but you can. I think you and Benny should have children together.”
“I'd like that,” Benny said.
“They'd be yours too, Radamar,” Iefyr said.
Radamar lowered his eyes. “I don't deserve that.”
“Yes you do.” Benny nudged his chin up so she could kiss him. “You're not wearing the mask of a monster anymore. You've become the person you always were inside but were never allowed to show. Now you're a father, a friend, a lover . . . don't look at me like that, we'll figure out how to give you pleasure. Because you deserve it and we love you and we belong together.” She kissed his lips again, then his brow. “I know you're scared. What was taken from you has changed you and is still changing you. Do you remember the first time I showed you my body, how scared I was and how certain you'd be disgusted by what had been done to me? You weren't. You held me close and were gentle with me. I'll be the same way with you now, but this time we have love supporting us.”
Spellkeeper Page 36