by Kathy Love
He placed a hand on the wall and pulled in a deep breath. Roughness scraped his palm, and for the first time, he realized Mina’s shove had actually damaged the wall. A hairline crack ran down the length of where his body had made impact, and the drywall was crushed inward.
Damn. He stared at the wall. One minute, they were kissing. A mind-blowing, totally erotic in its sweetness, kiss. Then he was hitting the wall with more force than a direct train hit. Okay, more like a direct hit from a mini. But either way, her response was completely unexpected. And not one he’d ever received from a woman he was kissing.
He pulled in another breath, then started down the stairs two at a time. What the hell had happened? Why had she freaked? Her opinion of him was clear, and he could see her being annoyed that he’d kissed her, but she’d been way more than annoyed. She’d been terrified.
The hallway was empty, but he could hear her at the back door fumbling with the locks. He hurried down to the next floor, only to see her disappear into the back alley. He started after her, then stopped as more rushes of emotions hit him. Fear, disgust, distress. With no hint of desire.
He stopped, still stunned by the rapid change of events. What the hell had just happened? How could things go from bad to damned awesome to amazingly bad in a matter of minutes?
Sebastian leaned on the wall, still staring at the closed doors, trying to decide if he should follow her or give her time to calm down. Could her violent reaction all be related to her opinion of him? Was she that disgusted by him?
He didn’t think so. When they’d been discussing his personality traits, and her misunderstanding of them, he’d seen her eyes drift down to his lips. He’d felt wisps of desire whirling around them, budding into something stronger, something more certain.
The slight vibration had excited him far more than the outright crackle of longing that had been radiating from the blonde in the club. Before he’d thought better of it, he’d kissed Mina, wanting to see if what he’d felt was real.
If he’d thought Mina’s barely-there desire had been exciting, he hadn’t been prepared for the heady taste of her. And her tempting response. Intense, yet timid as if she’d never kissed a man before. Sweet and so thrilling Sebastian had had a difficult time keeping his own need under control. Especially when he’d felt the small prick of her fangs. He’d been ready to take her right then.
Then all hell had broken loose-and broken the stairwell wall, too. She might be small, but Mina packed a surprisingly strong wallop. Sebastian knew it had been her absolute terror that had given her the surge of strength.
He pushed away from the wall, suddenly needing to know what had Mina so scared. He had to know if her fear was of him, or something else. He just didn’t understand.
He knew she would be reluctant to talk to him, but he had to try. An overwhelming sense of protectiveness tightened his chest, again making him pull in a deep, steadying breath.
He reached for the back door, when a gruff voice stopped him. “Sebastian.”
He turned to see Mick, leaning on his office door, his tremendous bulk haloed by the blue of the computer screens behind him. His impassive features didn’t reveal whether he’d just seen Mina panicking to escape the club. But of course, he had. Mick saw most things in the club. As an ancient faery, he had the uncanny ability to assimilate hundreds of things at once. Faeries’ preternatural abilities to read their surroundings made vampires look like novices.
“Everything is okay,” Sebastian assured him, certain Mina’s panicked departure must be what had pulled him away from his computers.
“I don’t think so,” he said and held out several sheets of paper.
Sebastian hesitated, looking at the door, then approached him, taking the pages. Lists of phone numbers. Outgoing and incoming calls to the health department.
“I think you will be interested in the incoming call placed three days ago at 8:52 P. M.»
Sebastian scanned the list until he found the number Mick had highlighted in bright yellow ink. A 917 area code. A New York cell phone number.
“Did you trace this-” Before Sebastian could finish, Mick held out another paper.
Sebastian took it. This one was from his own computer. A list of addresses and phone numbers for his employees.
He glanced back to Mick. “The caller was one of the staff?”
Mick nodded, then pointed to the sheet.
Sebastian didn’t even have to look at the name, before a sinking feeling weighed heavily in his stomach. He knew exactly who the caller had been.
Sure enough. Wilhelmina Weiss was highlighted in more yellow ink.
He stared at the page, her name and address blurring in front of his eyes. He couldn’t believe it. But hadn’t he toyed with that very idea, too? He’d known something wasn’t right about her behavior. And didn’t that explain her opinion of him? No, not really. But it did verify just how much she disliked him.
The numbers matched. The date and time were right. She had made the call; there was no doubt. But why? What did she have against him and Carfax Abbey?
Wilhelmina wasn’t sure how long she roamed the streets, lost in her own distressed thoughts. Not until the rain started falling again, making the sidewalks slick and her nerves on edge, did she realize she should go home.
As she entered her apartment building, she half-expected Sebastian to be waiting outside her door for her. But the hallway was empty.
Blessedly empty, she told herself, even as a strange feeling too much like disappointment caused her stomach to sink.
She unlocked the door to find the apartment dark. Lizzie was gone to the lab again. She walked directly to the bathroom, turning on the water in the shower. As the water heated, she stared at herself in the mirror. Not something she did often, because her translucent reflection only served to remind her of what she was. And while she’d learned to deal with her vampirism, she still couldn’t handle such vivid and undeniable proof.
Her see-through likeness stared back at her, like her own ghost coming to haunt her. Just like her past was coming back to haunt her, too. A past she’d believed buried.
But ghosts always returned, didn’t they? She stared at herself until the steam from the shower made her indistinct features disappear from the mirror completely. Then she turned to the shower, stripping off her clothes. The hot water burned her cold, undead skin. She shivered, even though temperature changes shouldn’t affect her bloodless flesh. For some reason her body didn’t seem to remember that fact.
Wrapping her arms around herself, she stood under the spray, willing the ice that snaked through her veins to disappear, just as she tried to make the memories disappear.
Sebastian’s lips pressed to hers. The sizzle of her own desire. The taste of him on her tongue. Even now his sweetness filled her.
A strangled cry echoed off the tile walls, and it took her a moment to realize the sound came from her. She leaned back against the wall, closing her eyes.
Oh God, this wasn’t supposed to happen. Couldn’t happen. She didn’t have feelings like this. Not once, since she’d been crossed over, had her body reacted to a man.
She was the perfect choice for this mission, she told herself, desperate for it to still be true. She wouldn’t be attracted to a charming vampire. She couldn’t react. Not like a vampire. Not like a woman.
But she had. God, she had.
She slowly sank down the wall, the water pounding down on her. She wrapped her arms around bent legs, pressing her cheek to her knee.
She’d failed. She’d failed in more than the mission. Nothing she’d believed about herself had been true. And now, she didn’t know what to do. Where to start again.
She wanted to go back. Back to before she’d met Sebastian, and he’d made her doubt every truth she’d believed about herself. About who she was. About what she’d believed had changed in her. About the tight rein she kept on herself.
Clutching her legs tighter to her chest, she remained curled on the s
hower floor, willing away the feelings inside her. Feelings that terrified her. Feelings that had felt so wonderful, and reminded her that the kind of bliss she’d just experienced only led to excruciating pain.
Sebastian sat at the bar, staring at Mina’s name printed in bold Times New Roman on the white page. Why had she done this? Why had she targeted him? She didn’t even know him. Admittedly, he wasn’t good with names, but he never forgot a face.
He never would have forgotten Wilhelmina Weiss.
So why him? Why his club?
The bar was nearly empty now, except for the remaining waitstaff, who were finishing their evening sidework.
Greta was moving the tables to vacuum. Bryce wiped glasses and placed them under the bar.
“How well do you know Mina?” Sebastian asked the werebear.
Bryce startled at the sudden question, probably surprised that Sebastian had spoken to him, given that he’d been sitting at the end of the bar, silent for most of the night.
“Mina?”
“Wilhelmina,” Sebastian clarified.
“Not well. She’s only been here a couple weeks, and she’s pretty quiet.”
That was the answer he’d expected, although Sebastian’s muscles relaxed slightly. He told himself it was because he hated to think his employees knew more about the saboteur than he did. But he knew that wasn’t the truth. He hated the idea that Bryce knew more about Wilhelmina, period. Given that she’d been trying to close down his club, he couldn’t say why he cared. Just like he couldn’t say why he was more disappointed than angry with her.
He looked back down at the paper, reading her address for the hundredth time. All night, he’d debated if he should go to her apartment and confront her. But he’d hesitated.
The likelihood was that, after what had happened between them, she wouldn’t be back. She’d been too frightened, too distraught when she’d fled. He doubted she’d ever return. And if by some off-chance she did, he could have Nadine handle the situation and let her know her services were no longer required at the club. He never had to see the strange little vampiress again.
That idea didn’t make him feel better.
Because he wouldn’t have answers, he told himself. And he had a lot of questions.
So what held him back?
“Hey.”
Sebastian looked up to see Rhys as he slid onto the bar stool next to him.
“Hey,” Sebastian said, a little surprised to see Rhys in the club. Rhys was definitely the silent partner in Carfax Abbey. He’d never been that crazy about the place, and he never hung out there. But it was after hours.
Still he asked, “What are you doing here?”
“Nadine came up to talk to me. She said you’ve been sitting up here all night, nursing the same drink, and ignoring all the beautiful women who were trying to chat you up.”
“So?” Sebastian said, confused as to why that would worry Nadine enough to go to Rhys.
“We all know that isn’t normal behavior for you.”
Sebastian frowned, irritation rising up in him. Did everyone have such a low opinion of him?
“What? Are you trying to say that I’m such a degenerate that I can’t possibly just hang out here without hooking up with someone?”
Rhys gave him a worried look. “No. I don’t think you are a degenerate. But I do know that you like your female company. Frankly, you, yourself have always made that quite clear.”
Sebastian stared at his brother, then glanced away. That was absolutely true, and his own behavior had never bothered him before, so why should it now? Because of Mina’s estimation of him? That was stupid. The woman was a saboteur and possibly a lunatic. Neither possibility made him feel better, however.
“What’s going on, Sebastian?”
Sebastian looked at his brother. Then he slid the paper in front of Rhys. “This is going on.”
Rhys frowned down at the paper, of course, not understanding what he was looking at.
“Wilhelmina Weiss, one of our employees, was the one who made the call to the health department and presumably the police.”
Rhys eyes widened with understanding. Sebastian had mentioned the anonymous calls to him, and he’d agreed the timing between the two was a little too coincidental for them not to be connected.
“Really? So what did you do? Did you fire her?”
“Well.” Sebastian sighed. “Not exactly.”
Lifting an eyebrow, Rhys waited for him to continue.
Sebastian considered telling Rhys about the kiss, but instead he said, “We had an incident-not related to her sabotage attempts. And she’s gone.”
Rhys nodded. “Are you sure she won’t be back?”
“Yes.” Sebastian was sure, and he wondered why he didn’t feel more relieved.
“I think you should report her to the authorities. Carfax Abbey is your baby. You need to make sure she doesn’t do anything else to the club or the employees. She sounds like she must be crazy.”
“You don’t know Mina.” Sebastian bristled. “She’s got problems, but she’s not crazy.” Yet hadn’t he just considered the very same thing? Why the hell was he defending her?
“Do you know her? Is she one of your past women, who’s trying to hurt you to get back at you in some way?”
“No,” Sebastian stated. Again with the women.
“Are you sure?”
Sebastian glared at him. “Why is it everyone thinks I can’t keep track of my past women?”
“Because you can’t.”
Great. His brother thought the exact same thing about him that Mina did. Fucking great.
“I’m not narcissistic or depraved,” Sebastian stated.
“I didn’t say you were,” Rhys said, frowning. “Listen, why are you getting so upset about this? I thought you prided yourself on all your women.”
“I do,” Sebastian said moodily. “But Mina is different.”
Rhys raised an eyebrow, giving another of his irritatingly knowing looks.
“Not different like that. She’s a damned saboteur, for Christ’s sake.”
Rhys nodded, still looking unconvinced. “So why aren’t you off confronting her?”
That was the question of the night, wasn’t it?
CHAPTER 9
Wilhelmina perched on a kitchen chair, her legs curled up to her chin, sipping from a plastic tumbler. Each drink of the glutinous, cold liquid tasted more bitter, more unappetizing than the last.
She forced herself to ignore the taste, telling herself the unpleasantness of the flavor was just in her imagination. The protein concoction had never bothered her before.
She forced down one more sip, then placed the cup on the table, pushing it away. She rested her cheek on her knees and looked out the kitchen window at the heavy rain falling, reflected in the streetlights below. She hated the rain.
After her shower, and her complete meltdown, she’d crawled into bed and waited for dawn to arrive. As she knew it would, the sun had forced her racing mind to slow, and sleep to overtake her. And for those blissful hours of daylight, she’d forgotten everything.
She’d awoken tonight feeling calmer, but no less miserable. With that one kiss, she felt like her world had been turned upside down, and she didn’t know how to get back to the peace it had taken her nearly a dozen decades to find.
“Wil,” Lizzie appeared in the doorway. “I was planning to head over to the lab. If you’re okay?”
Wilhelmina forced a smile at her friend. Clad in leather pants and a biker jacket, Lizzie hardly looked like the typical scientist.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Wilhelmina said. “Go on ahead. There’s a Society meeting tonight and I want to go.”
That was a lie. Wilhelmina didn’t want to show her face to the Society. Not yet. Not with her failure so fresh. But she didn’t want Lizzie to worry. And although Wilhelmina had assured her nothing had happened last night, she knew Lizzie was concerned.
Lizzie watched her with intense pale eyes. E
yes that somehow reminded her of another set of intense eyes-ones that were golden topazes rather than frosty blue.
“If you’re sure? I’m really into something that I’ve been working on.”
“Then go,” Wilhelmina said, waving her away with an encouraging smile. “I’m good.”
Lizzie hesitated, then nodded. She lifted her red motorcycle helmet in a gesture of good-bye. “I’ll try not to be gone too late.”
Wilhelmina smiled, knowing that once Lizzie got involved in her research she lost all track of time. “Good luck.”
She listened to Lizzie leave the apartment, then turned back to watch the rain. Maybe Lizzie’s way was the right one. To cure preternaturals, rather than to try to conform them.
She certainly hadn’t been able to make a single change in the creatures of Carfax Abbey. In fact, she was the only one who’d come out of the experience changed. And not for the better.
She rubbed her cheek on her knee and tried to figure out how she could tell the others at the Society how badly she’d done in her attempt to stop Sebastian.
Sebastian. Even thinking his name made her remember things and feelings she didn’t want to recall. She closed her eyes, hoping that would block out the memories, but it didn’t. Instead she saw him, his beautiful features, his golden eyes. The pouty softness of his lips. Even the mere memory of his heady taste erasing the earlier bitterness of her drink.
She uncurled from her chair and paced the tiny kitchen. She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t stay here alone, thinking about things that were best forgotten. She had to move on. She’d moved on before, she could again.
Despite her reluctance to admit her total defeat, she would go to the Society meeting. Talking to the others could be a way to cleanse her soul. To surround herself with the preternaturals who held the same ideals she did. A way to reaffirm what she knew was true. A place to feel safe and sure and… okay.
She had to go back, even if it was hard. Feeling better, she headed to her room to get dressed.
Sebastian finished buttoning his shirt, then looked for his shoes. Finding them where he’d kicked them off by his bed, he slipped his feet inside, telling himself he’d head down to the club and get back to his normal life. No strange waitresses. No anonymous calls. No sabotage attempts of any kind.