Guided Love (Prick #1)

by Tracie Redmond

  “Gorgeous, you are not running away. You are going to dance with me and you’re going to love it. So, pick a few songs.” She looks down at the list and starts to type some numbers in.

  “You dance, Axel?” I fake that I am hurt with such a question and she starts to laugh.

  “Me? Do I know how to dance? Oh, gorgeous, I was taught by the best dancer there was. Ma told me the way to a woman’s heart was on the dance floor. A man that can dance can melt a woman’s heart.” I grab her hand and take her to the dance floor.

  We are the only ones out there but I really don’t give a damn. The song starts to play and I pull Samantha up against me. I put my right arm around her waist and bring our joined hands to my chest. This just feels right—her temple is up against my chin so I can just lower my head and whisper to her in her ear. Garth Brooks starts from the speakers with “To Make You Feel My Love.”

  She looks up surprised “Country? You chose Garth Brooks?” I smile down and her innocent look.

  “Samantha, I’m full of surprises. Listen to the words, it’s a great song.”

  As we start to dance, I pull her a little tighter to me and start to sing the lyrics to her. I close my eyes and I’m enjoying this moment with everything I am. Seriously, I have never felt this at ease with anyone else. I open my eyes and look up to see Camaron shooting daggers in my direction. Samantha has her head on my chest and she is facing the opposite way so she doesn’t see this, but he knows I do. We make eye contact, he starts to shake his head no, and all I can do is smile. Yep, I give him a cocky smile but I can’t help it, I have this gorgeous beauty in my arms and, fuck that, I am going to enjoy every minute. The song ends and the next one starts, it’s one of Samantha's picks.

  “This is from Twilight right?”

  She giggles and nods “Yes, it is one of my favorite movies and I absolutely love this song. It’s ‘1000 years’ by Christina Perri. It gives me hope when I listen to this song.”

  “Hope?”

  “Yeah, I hope that one day I find this love. Real love, love that will last a lifetime.” I am left staring into her beautiful brown eyes, I take my right hand, tilt her chin up, and kiss her cheek.

  Whispering into her ear, “Samantha, you will find this love. If anyone finds this kind of love it will definitely be you.”

  Her mouth is next to my ear and without missing a beat, she whispers back, “Do you really think so?”

  “Absolutely, baby, you deserve to be loved for a 1000 years.” We don’t speak further, I just hold this woman, this beautiful woman, in my arms and hope for, if only a moment, that she feels secure, that she feels she is someone, especially when she is in my arms.

  The song ends and she starts to pull away, but there is no way I am letting her go yet and as I don't let go of her hand she looks back. I then pull her in and start to two-step with her as Van Morrison comes blaring on the speakers singing ‘Brown Eyed Girl.’ She starts to smile and we lift the mood with a great fast song. We are only in a few steps when Camaron comes up to us.

  “Hey, Axel, can I cut in? This is our song and it just seems wrong to watch my Sam dance with you to OUR song.”

  I start to chuckle and shake my head. “Sure, prick, you can have this one. I’ll go grab us a few more beers.”

  I head over to the bar, get the beers, and walk back over to the table. “Hey, Roni, here, drink up.”

  I handed her another beer and take a gulp of mine. “Are they always like this?” Roni looks at me and she looks like a woman on a mission.

  She truly looks pissed. “Like what?”

  She shakes her head as she is taking another swig of her beer. “Always together? I think she is in love with him. I mean, really, what type of girl moves across country to live with her friend and help with his business if she isn’t in love with him.”

  “A friend. Roni, they have been friends for years, not one or two—I am talking 15 years. They are comfortable with each other. They have always been able to depend on one another and, honestly, you won’t get one without the other.”

  Again, I catch her sulking as she takes another mouthful, but I do hear her say, “Not for long.”

  The night has turned again and I’m dancing with Camaron to our song, ‘Brown Eyed Girl.’ This has been our song since our first dance in high school. I was a freshman and Camaron a junior. I wanted to go to the prom and, of course, freshman couldn’t attend unless asked by an upper classman. Camaron knew how badly I wanted to go so we went together. We had a blast that night, especially when they played this song. Camaron sang the words to me the entire time and he said that this would be forever our song. So, from that time on, whenever we’re out and the song comes on, we dance and he sings the words to me. At the very end, like always he twirls me and dips me down. He looks into my eyes and smiles before I am pulled up and twirled around again.

  He pulls me next to him, puts his arm around my shoulders, and whispers into my ear, “Sam, you will always be my brown eyed girl. No matter what, it’s always you and me.” I smile up and nod.

  The rest of the evening is great, Roni didn’t really speak and Axel and Camaron had me laughing to no end. As we are heading out, Camaron turns and nods at Axel, “Hey man, could you make sure to get Sam home?”

  “Where are you going?” I ask and of course, it’s like a bucket of ice cold water thrown at me.

  “My baby here needs to be fucked, isn’t that right, Camaron.”

  He shakes his head. “I'm sorry, she had a bit too much to drink. I’m going to make sure Roni gets home okay”

  “Yeah and then he is going to fuck me so hard. Right, baby, you are going to make me scream your name?”

  “Well, I’ll make sure to wait up for you.” Damn, once I say it, I can hear the desperation in my voice, I wish I could go back and erase it but no such luck.

  “No, Sam, don’t worry, I won’t be home tonight.” He looks down towards is feet as if he wants to say something but has this internal battle.

  “I just want to make sure that she will be okay. I’ll see you in the morning yeah?”

  Axel puts his arm around my shoulder and pulls me closer. “No worries, man, I got this. Samantha will definitely be taken care of tonight.” I want to laugh, because honestly, Axel knows how to break the ice, but the look on Camaron’s face looks like he was punched in the gut.

  “Make sure she gets home, Axel, not to your bed.”

  “Sure thing, prick, and no worries I’ll take care of Samantha.”

  Camaron grabs my arm and pulls me to the side. “Just let him walk you home, okay. Go home, you don’t want to keep spending the night at Axel's. Please, Sam, just go home.”

  I know it is completely wrong of me but I egg him on, if he gets to stay out all night why the fuck can’t I? “Cam, I hate being alone in the house, maybe he will stay at our apartment and not his, okay? No worries, he’ll take care of me.”

  Now he is fuming, red is creeping up his neck and filling up his face. “Please, Sam, just go home ALONE.”

  I stand on my tiptoes and kiss his cheek, feeling a little bold with all the alcohol so I whisper in his ear, “Cam, you know, I wish it was you taking me home and putting me to bed right, but Axel will do. Goodnight, Cam.”

  With that, I turn and grab Axel’s hand and put it around my shoulder as I wrapped my arm around his waist.

  Axel and I actually walked all the way back to our apartments that way—it really felt comfortable. We walk up to our building and he grabs my hand and leads me up to our landing. He also takes my keys from my hands and unlocks my door. Truly, Axel is such a great friend. He cares about me and is such a gentleman.

  “Okay, gorgeous, you have been delivered home safe and sound. Are you going to be alright?” I drop my bag on the side of the couch and take off the boots that have been killing my feet for the last two hours.

  “Yeah, Axel, I'll be fine. You want to stay and have a water and watch some TV or are you off to your place?”

&nbs
p; “I can have a water.” He heads to the kitchen, opens the refrigerator, and grabs two waters.

  “Do you mind if I run and rinse off?” He sits down on the couch and puts his feet up on the table.

  “No, gorgeous, go ahead I’ll find something for us to watch.”

  I bolt to my room and grab a pair of jogging pants and a t-shirt and jump into the shower. I get all finished and sit down next to Axel on the couch. I look over and see that he is smiling ear to ear.

  “What is that smile for, huh?” He starts to laugh. “What, Axel, tell me what did I do that’s so funny?”

  “Nothing, babe, you didn’t do anything that was funny.” He is still smiling like he has a secret.

  “Well then . . . why are you smiling like that?”

  He grabs my pant leg and says, “I just like seeing you in my pants.”

  And with that, he busts out laughing. I also crack up, tears are flowing and I have a pain in my side—that is how hard I am laughing right now. I hit him in the arm a few times and on the last attempt he grabs me and we start to roll around on the couch, still laughing at one another. Out of nowhere, there is a slam. We both look up. We probably look like our parents just caught us doing something inappropriate, even though nothing was going on.

  “What the fuck are you doing, Axel? Get the fuck off of her.”

  We both try to right ourselves.

  “Camaron, what are you doing here?” My voice is high pitched; I’m still trying to stop laughing.

  “Seriously? What the fuck are y’all doing?”

  Axel is still laughing and, of course, I start to laugh again.

  Axel composes himself just enough to reply, “Relax, jackass, Samantha and I were just discussing how I like seeing her in my pants.”

  Yeah, that didn't go over well and Camaron loses it.

  “Get the fuck out, Axel, stay away from my Sam, and keep your cock on lock down when you are around her. She doesn't need you, man, she has me.”

  The laughter is long gone now and shit just got real, Axel is off the couch and in front of Camaron.

  “Camaron, you better stop your mouth right now. You have no right, no fucking right to say a fucking thing about what Samantha and I do. You were not supposed to be here, remember, you were supposed to be with your GIRLFRIEND. You walked in during an innocent fucking thing and you are jumping the gun, man. So calm the fuck down before I calm you down, you hear me?”

  I am still sitting on the couch with my mouth wide open. Axel and Camaron are nose to nose and I don't know what to do. I jump off the couch and am standing in between them now. There is rage on both of their faces. Camaron looks like he is turning a deep red and when I look at Axel, I see he has a look of pure evil. I have never seen him angry, but this is beyond angry—he is truly pissed.

  “Calm down, guys, it’s all good. Camaron, what are you doing home? I thought you were spending the night with Roni?”

  He is still pissed and biting his lip like he wants to unleash on Axel but looks down at me.

  “What, Sam, you don’t want me here? Didn't realize you were that easy. Am I cock blocking you right now?” By the time he finished his sentence Axel had him by the throat up against the wall.

  “Shut your fucking mouth! Right now, you fucking prick, you are going to apologize to Samantha, your best FRIEND! You will never and, let me repeat, never, speak to her like that again. Do you hear me? When it comes to Samantha, you will show her some fucking respect, did I make myself clear?”

  I see that he is trying to nod and Axel releases him, now is gasping for air. He looks up at me and the anger is still there but there is also hurt in his eyes. He has his head down and he is shaking it back and forth. He walks over to me and looks at me with sadness in his eyes.

  “I’m sorry, Sam, I shouldn’t have said anything like that to you. You deserve respect and I’m sorry about what I just implied . . .” He doesn't finish, he, again, says sorry and walks towards his bedroom. It’s all quiet as we hear the door slam from the hallway. Axel walks back over to me and grabs my hand.

  “You okay, gorgeous? I am so sorry you had to deal with that.”

  “I am just shocked. I don’t know what has gotten into him.”

  “It was just Camaron being Camaron. He’s an asshole, babe, especially when he doesn’t get what he wants. You okay?”

  I nod. “Yeah, Axel, I’m good, thank you. I really appreciate you standing up for me.”

  I have a bad feeling in my gut but, at the same time, I am truly appreciative for what he just did for me. Axel just demanded respect for me. I have never had anyone, not even Camaron, defend me like that. My head is down and I’m fidgeting with my hands because I think I just screwed up with Camaron. I really think he is pissed at me and I didn’t even do anything. It’s like Axel can hear my thoughts, because he grabs my chin, lifts it up, and looks me straight in the eyes.

  “Samantha, you did nothing wrong, do you hear me? He thought he saw something and reacted like a dick. Gorgeous, we did nothing wrong. Got me?”

  I give him a little smile. “Got it.”

  He grabs my hand and walks to the door. “You gonna be okay?”

  “Yeah, I’ll be fine, Axel, thank you again.” Axel kisses my hand and opens the door.

  “Any time, gorgeous, and, Samantha, you do look good in my pants you know.”

  With that, I start to laugh and smack him again. “Good night, Axel, see you in the morning.”

  “Good night, Samantha, sweet dreams.” With that sexy wink and cocky smile, he goes into this apartment.

  I shut the door, lock it, and shut off all the lights. I am on my way to my room when I see Camaron's door open.

  “Sam, can we talk, please.”

  He follows me into my room where I sit, Indian style, on my bed as Camaron sits right in front of me.

  “Sam, I am so sorry that I spoke to you like that. I’m sorry if I was being a cock block and I made an issue about it. You’re single and I have no right to say who you can and can't be with. It just really bothers me to think of you being with Axel.”

  “Camaron, we were laughing and goofing off. What you think you saw was completely innocent. Axel would never look at me like that, but I’m flattered that you would even think he would. Camaron, why did you come home? Are you okay? Is everything okay with you and Roni?”

  Shaking his head and looking at me like I’m the kid who just asked the stupid question and, yes, we all know that there are stupid questions, people just say there isn’t so you don’t feel stupid.

  He asks, “Why would he not look at you that way, Sam? He just put me up against the wall for disrespecting you and I’m one of his best friends. Believe me, there is something there, Sam, and I don’t like it. I don’t like it at all.”

  “Whatever Cam. What happened? Why are you home?”

  He lets out a frustrated breath and runs his hand through his hair.

  “Roni and I fought,” he states and sits there and says nothing more. He pushes up off the bed and actually lies down next to me. I lie down and now we both are lying there in silence, staring up at the ceiling. He hooks his finger with my pinkie and starts to explain. “Roni thinks that we are too close. She thinks that we are more than friends. I explained to her that we have always been friends, and only friends, but she doesn't believe it. She says that she sees the way you look at me and she hates it. The kicker for tonight was when we were dancing—she didn’t like the fact that we have a song. Ugh, why does everything have to be so fucking complicated? I finally find a girl that I actually care for, one that I laugh with and enjoy spending time with and then it gets all fucked up because I have a best friend who is a girl. I mean, seriously, Roni has nothing to worry about, but she is a constant pain when it comes to you.”

  I feel my gut start to turn and I know I shouldn't ask questions I don’t want answers to, but being his best friend I have to be there for him so I find myself asking, “What do you mean she is a constant pain when it c
omes to me?”

  “It’s every day, Sam. I hear about you every day. If we are hanging out and my phone buzzes, she asks if it’s you. She asks why we live together, why we have never been together. It’s a nonstop discussion. I mean, I have tried to tell her that we will always be friends and only friends that she is the one I want, but then she calls me out and says that if that was the truth I wouldn’t have been upset seeing you dance with Axel to our song.”

  I find myself nodding along with him and trying to stay quiet, trying to let him talk through all of his thoughts.

  “Well, did you get upset? I mean, me dancing with Axel bothered you?”

  He turns his head to the side so that we are now looking at one another.

  “Yeah, a little. I have no idea why—I know I shouldn’t have, but deep down, yeah, it did. Just seeing you in Axel’s arms, I felt this feeling of jealousy, because, to me, I’ll always be that man in your life. The one you turn to, the one that you depend on. Yet, it seems, lately, that we are falling apart. It feels like, because you and Roni aren’t getting along, I can’t have both of you in my life and you are finding comfort with the pricks and not with me. I just wish that you two could actually be friends, that the two most important women in my life are happy and getting along.”

  I look into Camaron’s eyes and I see that he is hurting and frustrated. My gut is sick, I want to throw up, and my heart is breaking because right now, as his best friend, I have to sacrifice myself. I should be telling him to choose me that I would make him happy; that whatever I have to do I’ll do just so I can have my forever, but that is not what I am saying, I am giving up my happiness for his because that’s what you do for those you love right?

  “Cam, it will all be okay. I promise whatever I have to do to make Roni comfortable, I will. I’ll make sure that she knows that she is who you choose and that we are JUST friends, okay.”

  He pulls my hand up, kisses it, and then adjusts us so that we are spooning. I am lying on my bed with my best friend, the man who owns my heart and we are spooning. He has his arm wrapped around my waist and he is pulling me up against him.