“Atta boy,” Ron muttered under his breath.
Everyone laughed again, and even Anderson surrendered to a smirk. Then he pulled his hand from my face to grab the package he’d been holding. It was wrapped in simple brown paper and twine, and he held it out for me to take.
“I told you before that Dani used to do words of the day,” he said as I gently unwrapped the paper. I let it fall to our feet as I held out a beautiful sketchbook thick with blank pages. The cover of it was wood, freshly stained, with a single word carved in neat script right in the center.
Oenemel.
“It means strong and sweet all at once,” he said, answering the question I hadn’t asked yet. “The day Dani told us that word, I made fun of it. I didn’t think anything in the world could be both strong and sweet. Not until I met you.”
I smiled, but choked on a cry, more tears letting loose as I used my free hand to swipe at them. I looked up at Anderson, the most gentle and kind person I’d ever met, and I realized the feeling that had shook me to my very core at the thought of losing him wasn’t just want or need.
It was love.
“I know you’re having a hard time finding the inspiration to sketch right now,” Anderson said, nodding toward the book. “But I made this for you because I want you to know that whether you stay or go, whether we make it or not, I believe in you. And I always will.”
I looked down at the book again, tracing the engraving with my fingers before placing it in the driver seat behind me and jumping into his arms.
He caught me easily, strong hands finding my waist as I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him with every emotion I was feeling. Love, adoration, disbelief, awe, fear. When I pulled back, cheeks still wet, I shook my head as if he didn’t truly exist.
“I love you, too, Anderson,” I breathed, and his hands squeezed where he held me as he let out a long exhale of relief. “I love you grumpy and cursing while you work around the cabin and I love you happy and carefree walking beside me along the river.” We both laughed, and I traced the edge of his jaw with my thumb. “And I am so sorry I ever made you doubt my feelings. I don’t care if they’re right or if the timing doesn’t make sense. I learned the hard way what happens when you listen to what should be instead of listening to your heart, and I’ll never do it again. I love you. And I don’t know what happens next, but I know I want to find out.”
Anderson smiled, moving his hands to cradle my face before pulling me in for a longer, softer kiss.
Everyone clapped around us and we broke the kiss with another laugh, Anderson tucking me under his arm as we turned to face the people who loved us. Momma Von was a sobbing mess and Ron beamed with pride. Everyone else was just smiling, even Tucker, and I leaned into Anderson, resting my head on his shoulder.
“Can you stay with me tonight?” he asked, voice just above a whisper in my ear.
I nodded, and he kissed my forehead before addressing the group.
“Alright, gawkers, you’ve seen the show. Now get out of here so this gorgeous girl and I can make some plans.”
They all cheered, a mixture of laughter and I told you so’s and congratulations and about damn time’s rolling in at us all at once. I just smiled up at Anderson as he looked down at me like he was the luckiest guy in the world.
“You ready?” he asked.
And even though I had no idea how we would make it work, or what would come next, I answered without a single doubt in my mind.
“Ready.”
AB OVO
ab-OH-voh
Adverb
From the beginning
My hand shook a little as I released Wren’s and unlocked the door to my cabin. It was the first time I’d invited her inside it, the first time I’d let her in to see the place I called home.
The funny thing now was that she felt more like home than any cabin or town ever did.
When I pushed the door open and placed a hand on the small of her back to guide her inside, I swallowed back the last bit of nerves still hanging around. She was here, she was staying—at least for the night—and she loved me, too.
Nothing else mattered.
Wren unwrapped her scarf, hanging it over the coat rack and gently placing the sketchbook I’d made her on my dining room table before running her fingers over the polished wood as she looked around. We were both quiet, yet comfortable, and I stood back with my hands in my pockets and watched her take it all in.
“It’s exactly what I’d imagined it’d be,” she said softly, crossing the room to the large windows that lined the back of the living room and overlooked the river. Now that she was inside, it was exactly what I’d imagined it could be, too.
Ever since Ron had verbally smacked some sense into me, my hands had been working on her sketchbook while my mind worked on what I’d say to make her see she belonged with me. I’d barely slept, my stomach in knots over how she’d react. But it was better than I could have imagined, and though I knew there were still a million questions we needed to answer, I wasn’t worried about a single one.
Wren turned, the evening sunlight a soft glow behind her as she made her way back to me. I still hadn’t moved from the front door, and she carefully threaded her hands behind my neck, playing with the edge of my hairline as her green eyes flicked back and forth between mine.
“I’m so sorry, for everything,” she said again but I shook my head, lowering my lips to hers to silence her apology. I’d missed her—God, I’d missed kissing her—and having her in my arms again almost felt like a dream.
I pulled back, brushing the sliver of fallen hair from her face. “These past two weeks have been hell, but I needed them as much as you did, Wren. I think being away from each other made us realize that everything we felt when we were together was real. Before, when we were spending every day together, it was too much. It was too good, and neither of us felt like we deserved it. Or like it was right.”
She nodded. “There’s still so much to figure out... I still have to go back to Seattle. At least, for a little while. Maybe forever.”
“I know,” I assured her. “And we’ll figure it out.”
Wren smiled, hands sliding down from where they were hooked around my neck to rest on my forearms. Then her eyes fell to the corner behind me and she paused. “That’s her, isn’t it?”
I didn’t have to turn to know she was looking at Dani’s picture, the one that’d been by my front door since I’d moved in. And I didn’t have to answer, because she already knew.
Wren slipped from my arms and reached for the frame, running a finger along the edge as she looked into the eyes of the first person to ever show me what family was. Dani would have loved Wren, and for a moment I felt a stab of pain low in my stomach at the realization that they’d never meet.
“I went to see her,” I said after a moment, my voice a little raw.
Wren set the frame back down and turned to me. “Dani?”
I nodded. “I knew I had to let go of the guilt I held over her death. I’ve been harboring it for so long. It changed every fiber of my being, so much so that I didn’t even know who I was when you first met me. But being around you, talking to you about her, about me, about dreams and hopes again... it woke me up. You woke me up. And I realized that I couldn’t keep living with that guilt, whether you were in my life or not.”
She swallowed. “Momma Von told me about that day... about what happened.”
My heart raced a little faster, that same guilt I’d just said I’d abandoned surging again. It wasn’t gone just because I’d chosen to let it go. It still existed, and knowing Wren knew what happened to Dani and how I’d been a part of it terrified me.
But she stepped into me again, this time wrapping her arms around my waist.
“It wasn’t your fault. And I know it’s hard to see that, but it wasn’t. Just like it wasn’t my fault my marriage didn’t turn out the way I’d always planned. The guilt isn’t easy to let go of, neither is the pain, but you�
�re right. We have to live again—without that fear. Both of us.”
“Together.”
Wren’s eyes lit up and she pressed onto her toes to kiss me. “Together.”
I slid both hands back into her hair, grip tightening as I pulled her into me. She sighed as I deepened the kiss, and I took my time, lips pressing to hers in a steady tempo. I kissed her softly, tongue sweeping against hers, teeth nipping at her bottom lip before I started all over again. I could have kissed her just like that for hours or maybe even days, but she slid her hands just under the hem of my sweater, tugging at the belt she’d made, and I heard what she didn’t have to ask.
I bent, sweeping her up easily and keeping my mouth on hers as I cradled her slight frame against mine. I climbed the stairs with one hand wrapped around her ribs and the other arm hooked under the bend of her legs, just like I had that first night I’d met her. I felt the measurement of our time together as both a flash of light and the span of a lifetime. Maybe it was because a new life had started for me when I’d met her. She’d opened my eyes, shared her light, and pulled me from the shadows.
My heart hammered harder as I rounded the top of the stairs and carried Wren into my bedroom. I dropped her gently to her feet just at the edge of the bed, pulling back as both of us breathed harder. Wren’s eyes bounced between mine, her lips parted, and then she simply lifted her arms above her head.
I trailed my hands down her ribs, her waist, until they hooked at her hips and dragged the thin fabric of her long-sleeve shirt up and over her head. She unclasped her nude, lacy bra with her eyes still locked on mine, and I pulled my sweater off next. She smiled a little as her hands reached for my belt, and she unhooked it at the back, the expert hands who’d made it stripping it off me like that’s what she’d made it for in the first place.
It was so quiet in my cabin and I was sure Wren could hear how hard my heart pounded as we stood there, face to face, peeling off our clothes and laying our souls bare at the same time. Wren laid back on the bed when only her leggings remained and my hands dipped under the band of them, working them down over her hips as she lifted them from the bed to help me. The fabric clung to her legs and I slipped each leg off slowly, one by one, hands running the length of her creamy skin once the leggings were gone.
Wren was porcelain, fragile and smooth, spread out in my sheets like she didn’t care that I could break her. But as I pressed a soft kiss to the inside of her ankle, I realized it was because she wasn’t the only breakable one. And maybe that’s what love was, giving someone the power to shatter you and trusting that they wouldn’t.
I wrapped my hands around her ankles, dropping to my knees at the edge of the bed and slowly kissing my way up the inside of her legs. She squirmed under my mouth, hands twisting in the sheets only I had ever touched as I alternated legs, kissing and sucking and biting until I reached her thighs. I hooked my arms under them, pulling her closer, one hot breath sparking a moan from her lips before I ran my tongue along her wet opening.
She arched, head falling back as one hand found my hair and she tugged. I swirled my tongue up and over her clit before sucking it gently, her legs shaking around me, hips grinding against my mouth to find more pressure. I gave it to her, sliding one hand up and under her thigh until I could slip one finger inside. Wren moaned, loud and breathy, body rolling as I slipped another finger in and sucked harder.
When she was on the edge of her release I stopped, pressing a feather-light kiss to her clit before crawling up her body, slow and calculated, stopping at nearly every inch along the way. I sucked the skin stretched tight over her hips, ran my tongue along the defined muscles of her small abdomen, rolled my tongue over each puckered nipple before biting them softly and finally kissing her mouth, the sweetness of her still on my tongue.
She wrapped her arms around my neck tight, hands fisting in my hair before they pulled down my back, nails carving into my skin. I hissed into her mouth and she smiled, grinding her hips into me, the tip of me brushing the wetness of her.
Our foreheads were pressed together and I broke our kiss, mouth still open and her breath hot on my lips as I spread her thighs wider and entered her, inch by euphoric inch. She whimpered as I stretched her, and when I pulled back only to press in deeper, she clawed at my neck, pulling my mouth to hers once more.
Everything felt different.
The way she wrapped around me, the beat of her heart under my chest, her lips on mine—it was rapturous. We were connected, bodies zipped together at every inch, mouths desperate to get closer, taste more. But it wasn’t just a physical connection. It was spiritual, like everything worth living for was wrapped up in the sheets with us in that very moment.
I rocked into her faster, my hands gripping her wherever they landed—her hips, her breasts, the apex of her neck, the small of her back. I wanted her closer, wanted to pull her into me, wanted to exist as one. I’d told her I loved her, and now I was showing her the words were true.
“I’m coming,” she whispered against my lips, breath catching. She held it, lips open as I kissed the corners of them, her chin, down to her neck, and when I rolled my hips, pushing in deep as my body rubbed against hers, the friction caught—fire started—and the flames licked at every inch of her as she came under my touch.
She pulsed around me, bringing my climax right on the heels of hers, and we both shook in each other’s arms. I didn’t stop kissing her, lips covering her skin as her name left my lips on a prayer. When I slowed, my heart still beating loud in my ears, Wren smiled and dug her heels into my backside, pulling me in one last time with a moan as she kissed me hard.
“I love you,” she whispered.
I brushed her hair from her eyes, letting her see mine. “I love you, too.”
“I’m scared.”
At that I laughed. “So am I.”
“But we’ll be okay?”
I watched her for a moment, this girl who’d spun into my life like the most dangerously beautiful tornado, and I nodded. “We’ll be okay.”
She kissed me again and I rolled over, pulling her onto my chest and rubbing wide circles on her bare back as we both came down from our highs. She shivered a little, a content smile on her face.
“There’s something else I have to tell you.”
She hummed, eyes closing.
“What’s that?”
I swallowed, but not because I was scared this time. I was excited, I had been since I’d found out, and Wren was the number one person I wanted to share my joy with.
“I got the job, with the guy out of Seattle. He’s coming out here next week to finalize all the details.”
Wren popped up to rest on her elbows, grinning wider now. “That’s incredible, Anderson. Congratulations.” She leaned down to kiss me and I held her there, wrapping an arm around her and pulling her closer until she threaded her leg between mine.
“We’ll be leaving in a little over a month,” I added, stomach dropping at the thought of leaving her behind. But she had her own dreams to chase, and I didn’t know how yet but I knew we could have our dreams and our love, both.
Wren hovered over me, her hair a mess from my hands being tied in it, eyes tired and sated. “And I’m about to be in crunch mode for this line,” she said. “Especially since I was supposed to be coming back with a book full of brilliance and I’ve got about ten pages of starting material, at best.”
I chuckled, squeezing her side. “You’ll figure it out. Your team is going to be so excited to see you and I’m sure they’ve been working, too. I’m not worried about you.”
“And I’m not worried about us,” she said. She stared at me for a moment, shaking her head like it was a dream to her, too. “You know, I never saw you coming. You were the last thing I expected to find out here.”
“That makes two of us,” I answered with a smile.
“I’m so happy I did.”
I swallowed, nodding in answer and pulling her down into me, my lips pressing against hers
with the emotions of all the words I’d never know how to speak.
I didn’t know if she could feel it, that she’d saved me, but she had. And now I would spend every day I was lucky enough to keep her showing her how beautiful she was—just as she was—passionate, creative, kind and smart.
And maybe we did have a lot still to figure out. Maybe we would spend our lives together or maybe we were only prolonging a heartbreak that would hurt us both in the end. Either way, I knew one thing was true.
No two days would ever be the same again.
I woke up with the sun the next morning, Anderson wrapped around me with my back to his chest. It was warm under the sheets and I sighed contently, replaying the last twenty-four hours, how everything had changed.
He loved me. I loved him. It was crazy, possibly stupid, and yet the most amazing feeling in the world.
There was a giddiness that existed like a dozen butterflies under my ribs, flittering and filling me with something I hadn’t felt in so long I wasn’t sure it was actually real. It was enough to pull me from the cozy spot in Anderson’s arms, though he grunted in protest, but I kissed his cheek and pulled on one of his sweaters before padding downstairs.
It was early, a soft purple glow from the rising sun the only light in Anderson’s kitchen as I swiped my sketchbook from the table. There was a blanket draped over the arm of his couch and I grabbed it, too, before letting myself out onto the back porch.
His cabin had a better view of the river than mine, the trees behind it cleared out and replaced with a neatly defined trail down to the water. There were stacks of firewood under the overhang of a small shed and a small, two-person hot tub that looked like it hadn’t been used in years. There was only one chair on the back porch, but it was cushioned and clean, and I wrapped the blanket around my waist before sitting and tucking my legs underneath me.
I ran a hand over the cover of the book Anderson had made me, fingers tracing the letters before I flipped it open to the first blank page. Inside the cover, just between the binding, there was a new charcoal pencil sharpened to a point. I unfastened it from the tiny clip that held it and rolled it between my fingers just as a light breeze swept in from the river.
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