Hate the Way He Loves Me

by Stacey Covington-Lee

  Zoe gave him a sweet, appreciative smile and kiss on the cheek. “Thank you for everything Harvey and I’ll check on you soon.”

  ~~~~

  Martha hadn’t blinked twice when Zoe relayed all that Harvey had shared with her, including his advice that they move. All she’d said was “Let’s go to U-Haul and get some boxes and tape.” Zoe was so sorry that her mom had to be uprooted again, but was thankful that Martha was so understanding and supportive. Martha had even remarked that she wished she had been as strong as her girls when she was younger. If she’d had the strength and courage to leave Otis, their lives would’ve been so different. But there was no way for her to change any of that now and to dwell on it was pointless. Now was the time to do all that she could to help keep her daughters safe. Martha had taken it upon herself to go out and purchase a 9mm gun for protection. She’d even gone so far as to take her new weapon to the shooting range for lessons. Her thought process now was that if someone was big and bad enough to burst in her home, then they were big and bad enough to take a bullet.

  Now the only thing left to do was to tell Pam that they had to move. Martha decided to deliver the news herself. She didn’t know how Pam would react, but thought she could better handle her hysterics than Zoe could. Zoe had always had a way with Pam, but now she was so shaken that handling her older sister just wasn’t an option. Martha patiently sat at the kitchen table, sipped on coffee, and waited for Pam to get home. She’d spent the night with Alvin so Martha had expectations of Pam being in a great mood, but she was dead wrong. When Pam finally made it home, she walked in the kitchen, dropped her hand bag, and plopped down. She looked as if she’d been crying.

  What now? “What’s wrong, baby?” Martha asked hesitantly.

  “Alvin asked me to marry him last night,” Pam said flatly.

  “Pam that is wonderful,” Martha clapped her hands as if she were staring in a Clump’s movie. Then she realized she was the only one that was excited. “What’s wrong? I would think that you’d be jumping up and down with excitement. Why are we not celebrating?”

  “Mama, I don’t want to get married. I told you that a long time ago, remember? I’ve been clear that marriage is not something I’ve ever wanted for myself. I do want a committed relationship, but I don’t think a piece of paper is necessary in order to have that. I told him that I’d love to move in and share his life and space, but he said that’s not enough.”

  “Sweetheart, do you know how many women would kill to be in your position? You have a wonderful man that loves you and wants to build a life with you. Please help me to understand why you don’t want that?”

  “I do want that Mama, but you don’t have to be married to build a life with someone. Everyone I’ve ever known that’s had a good relationship lost it after they got married. Marriage changes things Spouses take each other for granted, fight about every little thing, and sadly, they stop trying to please each other. Married people tend to think about themselves first, their spouse last, and complain about everything. That’s not the kind of relationship I want.”

  “It doesn’t have to be that way for you and Alvin. Yes, I’m the first to admit that marriage is hard, but contrary to popular belief there are some beautiful marriages out there. There are still men that respect their wives, are faithful, loving, and dedicated to being good family men.”

  “And he can be all that without being married! Hell, look at Oprah and Stedman, they’ve been together for years and have never needed a marriage license to prove that they are dedicated to one another,” Pam’s voice spiked with frustration.

  “What’s going on?” Zoe asked as she entered the room. She assumed that the tension she felt was because Pam had been advised of their pending move.

  “Alvin asked your sister to marry him last night and she said no,” Martha said with a bit of an attitude.

  “Humph… Well congratulations on the proposal and the courage it took to say no.” Zoe grabbed a soda out of the fridge and joined them at the table.

  “How can you two be so cavalier about being single for the rest of your lives?” Martha clearly didn’t understand that every woman didn’t have grand dreams of marriage and kids floating in their heads.

  “Mama, I’ve seen enough horrible marriages to know that it’s something I’d have to think long and hard about before agreeing to be any man’s wife. Hell, I don’t even think I’d agree to even living with anyone else at this point,” Zoe confessed.

  “Zoe, you’re upset about everything that’s happened to you and just speaking out of anger. But Pam, Alvin is a wonderful man and I’d hate to see you lose him and the wonderful life y’all could have together.”

  “I hear you Mama,” Pam quipped. “So enough about me, what else is going on?”

  Martha and Zoe exchanged glances and Pam knew that whatever would follow wouldn’t be good. “Are y’all going to keep cutting your eyes at each other or is somebody going to open their mouth and tell me something?”

  “I’m sorry Pam, but we’ve got to move,” Zoe said bluntly and she could see shock and anger creep across Martha’s face.

  They’d agreed that the news would be better delivered by Martha, but Zoe had dropped it like it was nothing. And to their great surprise, Pam didn’t flip out, didn’t cry, didn’t start shaking, or checking the locks. She simply said “Yeah, I figured we would.”

  CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

  April had been blowing Zoe’s phone up. She was worried about her friend and knew that something bad had happened, but Desi never called her back. Zoe had been so caught up in the mess that was her life that she hadn’t returned any of Aprils calls. Finally they’d gotten a chance to talk in depth over lunch and April was shocked, but more than anything she was mad as hell. She’d never understood how a man could be so weak as to put his hands on a woman, let alone do the evil that Ramon had done to Zoe. When Zoe told her that she had to quickly find a place to move to, April placed a call, wrote down an address, and told Zoe to bring her sister and mom there after work.

  Seven o’clock rolled around and the Shaw women were pulling into the driveway of a nice split level house just east of downtown Atlanta. The neighborhood was well kept and all the lawns were perfectly manicured. “Whose house is this?” Pam asked.

  “I’m not sure. This is where April said for us to meet her. Let me call her and see where she is.” Zoe reached for her cell phone, but as she got ready to dial the number a car pulled up behind her. Zoe glanced in the rearview mirror and saw a gorgeous specimen of a man step out of the driver’s seat. The tall, mocha colored man walked around, opened April’s door and extended his hand for her to grab onto. Zoe jumped out of the car anxious to see who April was with and why she had them meet her there.

  “Hi ladies,” April chirped cheerfully. “This is my brother, Eugene. Eugene, this is my friend, Zoe, her mother, Martha, and sister, Pam.

  “Wow, a family of beautiful women,” Eugene remarked as he shook each of their hands. “It’s a real pleasure to meet you all.”

  “It’s nice to meet you as well,” Zoe said with a smile on her face. She then turned her attention to April. “So April, what are we doing here girl? Whose house is this?”

  “It’s yours if you want it,” April replied matter-of-factly. “Eugene here owns several residential properties in and around the city. I told him a little about your situation and he has offered to let you guys rent this house for as long as you want to.”

  “Are you serious?” Zoe’s smile grew wider and when she looked at Martha and Pam, they too were grinning like little kids. “Do you mind if we look around inside?”

  “Yes we’re serious and feel free to look around as much as you like,” Eugene confirmed as he held out a set of keys to Zoe.

  The house was beautiful. There was a large eat-in kitchen, living room, formal dining room, family room, and three spacious bedrooms. But the best part for Zoe was that there was a finished basement. For her that meant creating her own living spac
e and regaining the privacy that she hadn’t had since leaving Virginia. She mentally mapped out how she would decorate it, what would go where, and how peaceful it would be.

  “Eugene, how much are you asking for rent?” Martha asked.

  “Is $1000 per month plus utilities reasonable for you guys?”

  “Are you kidding? That’s less than what we’re paying now for that cramped apartment we’re in!” Pam couldn’t hide her excitement.

  “Wait Eugene, we appreciate this so much, but we’re not trying to take advantage. You could easily get much more than that for this house.”

  “You’re not taking advantage,” he reassured her. “You’ll actually be doing me a favor, this house has been sitting for a while and I don’t like for my properties to be empty for too long.”

  “Are you sure?” Zoe asked with concern written on her face.

  “He’s positive Zoe, now stop looking a gift horse in the mouth,” April interjected. “Now when do y’all want to move in?”

  “Is tomorrow too soon?” Martha asked. She had been packing like a mad woman and was anxious to move. The last thing she wanted was for Ramon to get out before they could relocate.

  “I’ll have a moving truck at your apartment in the morning,” Eugene replied with a smile, displaying his gorgeous pearly whites again.

  “Eugene you don’t have to do that, we can”

  Agitated, April interrupted, “Damn Zoe. Let the man do this for y’all if he wants. You need to learn to let people help you and just say thank you.”

  Everyone had taken off work and helped in the move. After everything was situated, Zoe ran out and grabbed food and wine so that they could celebrate their new place. April, Desi, Kirk, and Alvin had all pitched in. Despite being upset over Pam’s rejection of his proposal, when he found out about the move, Alvin was the first one in line to help. They stayed up all night to finish the packing and waited at the house for the boxes and furniture to be delivered. Zoe shed tears as she watched everyone lift a celebratory toast. Despite everything she’d been through, she was grateful for her friends and family and didn’t know how she’d make it without them. She was also grateful that her supervisor had approved her request for family leave. Now she would have time to get her house and life in order as well as protect the job she’d come to love. At that moment, Zoe knew that God was changing things in her life and bringing her out of the darkness.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

  Less than two weeks after their initial arrest, Ramon and Rich walked out of jail like they didn’t have a care in the world. Candy was sitting outside of the Fulton County Police Department waiting to pick them up. “Hey guys, do you all want to go grab something to eat?” she asked in hopes that she could distract Ramon from the revenge that she knew must’ve been on his mind.

  “Hey Candy. I’ll leave y’all to the feasting. Would you please just drop me off at my house?”

  “Sure,” she replied very unenthusiastically.

  “Why you sound so disappointed, my company ain’t good enough for you?” Rich asked as he grabbed her thigh and squeezed tightly.

  Candy winced in pain. “Of course you are baby. I didn’t mean to sound like that. I’m always happy to be alone with you,” she lied.

  “That’s my girl,” Rich leaned in with a kiss and released the vice grip he had on her leg. “Now what are you going to fix to eat when we get home?”

  “I thought we’d go out and get something really good. Maybe eat at Rosebuds since we both love the food there.”

  “I want you in some heels, one of those short nighty things, and in the kitchen cooking me some pork chops,” Rich spoke in a harsh tone letting her know that that was his final decision.

  Candy remained silent for the rest of the ride to Ramon’s house. But she listened intently as he spoke of how he was going to immediately jump in his truck, go to Martha’s, and yank Zoe’s ass out of there. The more he talked the angrier he became. Ramon was pissed not only at the fact that Zoe left, but also that she had the nerve to press charges against him. For him, that was the ultimate betrayal and he had big plans to make her regret ever having done it. Candy’s heart began to ache for Zoe. She knew that Rich had probably concocted some wicked, painful punishment and Ramon was more than ready to inflict it upon her. Candy pulled in the driveway and before she could come to a complete stop, Ramon had opened the door, ready to jump out.

  “Alright man, go get that bitch and make her pay for this shit,” Rich encouraged him.

  “I’ll call you later and see if you want to come over and join in the fun,” Ramon grinned sadistically as he closed the car door and went to get in his truck.

  Ramon peeled out of the driveway and hurried over to Martha’s apartment. He didn’t see Zoe’s car there, but that didn’t mean anything. With Pam and Martha sharing a car now, one of them could have borrowed Zoe’s. He rushed past a couple of older men and jumped up the stairs two at a time. Ramon banged on the door as if he were trying to knock it down. His frustration began to grow when no one bothered to answer.

  “Zoe, Martha, Pam, one of y’all need to open the door now!” he demanded, but still his knocks went unanswered. “Look, I just want to talk Zoe, I promise,” he continued. He spun around to scan the parking lot once more, hoping that he’d just missed her car and she really was inside cowering in a corner. But there was no car, just one of the old men starring up at him as if he wanted to kill him. “What the hell are you looking at?” he barked at the man.

  “A dumb ass fool,” the man responded bluntly. “And they moved.”

  “When? Do you know where they moved to?” Ramon shouted as he ran back down the stairs.

  “I’m sure if the ladies wanted you to know that they would have told you,” the old man responded.

  “Look old man, I got $50 for you if you can tell me when and where they moved,” Ramon bribed.

  “Boy, you don’t have enough money to make me tell you nothing,” he grumbled as he turned his back to walk away. Ramon reached out and grabbed the man by the shoulder. “Boy, get your hands off of me. I’m not one of these women that you can smack around. I’m a grown man and I won’t hesitate to put a bullet in your ass.” The man snatched his shoulder from Ramon’s grip and walked away.

  Ramon was dumbfounded by the old man and his unwillingness to give up any information. He sprinted back to his truck and took off. If they had moved, he knew that Desi would know exactly where to find them. As he pulled up to Desi’s place he spotted Kirk and Desi getting into a car and pulled in behind them blocking their exit. He threw the truck into park and jumped out in a huff. “Desi, where can I find Zoe?”

  “Man, get the hell out of the way so that we can leave,” Desi demanded.

  “Look, I didn’t come here to make trouble,” Ramon said as he humbled himself. “I just want to find Zoe and apologize. I love her and I don’t know what the hell I was thinking when I hurt her. All I want is to make it right.” The lies tumbled from his mouth like mud in a landslide.

  “You should have thought about all of that beforehand. She wants nothing to do with you and if you go near her again your ass will be back in jail in the blink of an eye. Now move that raggedy ass truck out the way.” Desi turned to get in the car when he saw Kirk jump out with a bat in hand.

  “Touch him and I’ll beat the living hell out of you!” Kirk warned when he saw Ramon move aggressively towards Desi.

  “You punk! You were going to jump me from behind? Damn, you can’t even come at another dude face to face. Sneak attacks on men and beating women, damn you’re a bigger coward than I thought you were. Ain’t no way in hell I’ll ever let you near Zoe again. Now get the hell out of here before I call the cops.” Desi stood and watched as Ramon got back in his truck and pulled away.

  Turning the corner, Ramon cursed as he hit his steering wheel. He knew that he needed to play it cool with Desi, but his hatred for the man and desperation to find Zoe got the better of him. But he wasn’t ready to g
ive up, he pulled just outside the gate and waited for Kirk and Desi to pull off and he’d follow them for a bit to see if they’d lead him to Zoe. Twenty minutes later and Ramon was more disgusted than ever to see that he’d been led to Bulldogs, the hottest gay club in Atlanta. Ramon couldn’t see how Desi and Kirk laughed at him as he hurried off down the street.

  Back at the house, Ramon looked around to see if there was any remnants of Zoe, but as he expected, everything had pretty much been destroyed. He sat alone thinking of the good times he’d shared with Zoe, how he loved seeing her prance around the house in his tee shirts. He remembered how she’d crawl into bed and lay on his chest. And the more Ramon traveled down memory lane, the angrier he became. How could she so easily have walked out on him? Sure they fought, but every couple fought. And the whole thing with Rich, it was just his way of teaching her a lesson. If she had just understood that it was her job to do what he wanted and not make a big deal out of every little situation, they could still be together, sharing a happy life. But no, her strong will and refusal to be the woman he wanted her to be had torn them apart. Her high and mighty ass had even been keeping a file of shit she thought he’d done wrong and was trying to use it to keep him locked away. “That bitch!” he screamed as he flipped over the coffee table and punched a hole in the wall with his fist. Pacing the floor in anger, he realized that by now she’d left work more than an hour ago. But that was okay, he was concocting a plan to get his hands on her before the weekend was over.