"As good as can be expected, I suppose,” he said.
"Is something wrong? Your family?"
"No, no, they're fine. I'm good. Thanks for asking."
So stiff. So formal with each other.
There was a long pause.
In Texas, Reese didn't know what he'd expected, but this cool, monosyllabic conversation was not it. I'm not fine at all. Not since you left my life. Oh, God, Ashley, I'm not fine at all. Hearing your voice just highlights the fact.
But he didn't say all that.
He thought he'd heard a yawn in her voice when she said hello. Why was she losing sleep? Ohio was an hour earlier. It was dinnertime there. Not even near bedtime.
"Go to bed early?” He kept his tone cool, but his mind turned turbulent, half-angry that hearing her voice meant so much to him. Damn, damn, damn.
"Much too early to be sleeping,” he continued. Hell. Unless she wasn't alone. That could explain her distracted tone. In bed early with another man. He had no right to care. Not his business anymore. Served him right. He couldn't help remembering days they'd gone to bed at this time and then slept in exhaustion after making love. His heart pounded double time.
"Yes, it is."
God, he loved the sound of her voice. Even over the telephone it made his stomach do a floppy, sinking thing.
"I've.... “The soft melody of her feminine voice came again. “I've had a long day. Long days for a few weeks now. Last stages of a big project. I'm sorry. I just woke up from a short nap."
"What are your plans for the next few days?"
"Uh ... you want me meet with you ... to come to Texas in the next few days?” she asked after waiting a beat too long.
Her question surprised him. “Would you do that?"
Silence fell. After a moment, she whispered, “I can't meet so soon, Reese."
The regret Reese heard in her tone surprised him and soothed him some. 'I can't'. She'd said, 'I can't.' Not, 'I won't'.
In a blinding, world-spinning jolt of insight, he knew she'd said, ‘I can't' just that way four years ago. Almost as if she were disappointed.
Cold dread washed over him. He hadn't been listening.
'I can't marry you.’ She hadn't said, ‘I don't want to marry you, get out of my life'. Damn, he'd not been listening then. But, God help him, he was listening now. “Doesn't matter, I'll come to you."
"But, Reese, you never came here. I mean other than the first time. When we first met."
Her words sounded so disbelieving. As if Ashley wondered what had changed all of a sudden. He didn't know what to say. She spoke the truth, he hadn't come to see her back then. She'd done all the traveling back and forth all the time they were a couple. Didn't place him in the best gentlemanly light. Hell. Regret swamped him. It had been his choice all along. He saw that clearly now. He'd distanced himself from her, not the other way.
"I know, honey. I know,” he said. “I see that now. I was wrong.” He laughed, softly, sadly. “And it's way past time I changed that. One quick question?"
"Is there a man there with you?"
"No."
He closed his eyes in unadulterated relief.
"A man in your life?"
In Ohio, Ashley twisted the phone chord around her fingers. “No,” she answered automatically.
Heck, she didn't know what to do with him. Had the man been in a coma for four years? Had he been affected by amnesia and now he wanted to take up where they left off? “Well ... alrighty.” Brilliant wording, Ashley.
She stiffened. They should deal through the lawyer. She should point that out. Be strong on that requirement. Refuse to see Reese without a lawyer present. Because, darn it, his sexy voice—over the phone, for gosh sake—seduced her. The dark temptation to see him again, to steal a little forbidden time before he learned the truth, got the better of her.
They needed to talk about Mandy after all. No more delays. She should get some courage and face him without a hired go between.
"Alright, yes. Next weekend, though.” She went on, “I'll come to Texas and meet you in San Antonio. On the River Walk,” she offered, choosing neutral ground beyond the ranch, like the slinking, miserable coward she was. She wanted to seduce him this time. She'd wanted to see San Antonio for a long time. Four years ago, he'd promised to take her there some day.
Considering her growing suspicions of espionage, she didn't know how she could afford to leave her project just now, but she would.
"No, not this time, baby. I'm coming to you. Not next week. Now. Tonight. It's important for my personal growth that I do so. I've been far too arrogant and demanding in my dealings with you.” He laughed. “Not next weekend. The man I was yesterday would've relished the idea of you coming to me, savored it. I would've liked that a lot."
Ashley gulped. This wasn't demanding?
"Hell, I figure I'm a lucky man. You should have hung up on me by now."
"No! Not tomorrow."
Reese noticed she said no with more emphasis than polite conversation required.
"That is ... I mean ... Reese, you don't like children. And I have ... er ... I have my sister's daughter staying with me this weekend. I ... I should meet you there. In Texas."
Ashley smacked her forehead in disgust at what she'd told him. “Hard to find a baby sitter, you see,” she adlibbed, taking a deceitful path to hell. Unsure what to do. How to stop him from coming to see her, to stop him from learning the truth about Mandy so abruptly.
Silence fell.
"What do you mean, Ashley? I never said I didn't like kids.” What the hell? Reese forced himself to speak into the silence that grew with a life of its own. He sensed something was wrong in the tone of Ash's voice. She was tired, sleepy. Maybe that was all it was.
"Oh, yes, you did,” she argued, righteous certainty in her angry tone.
"No, no, I believe I said I didn't want us, you and me, to have kids of our own. Not that I didn't like kids. Hell, what kind of a man doesn't like children?” Reese felt indignant and affronted she thought he didn't like little ones. On the contrary, it had nearly killed him to lose his son. Damn, damn, damn, he'd been so raw, so closed mouth on the subject, she had no way of knowing he'd even lost Gabe. He should've shared that part of his past with her, but even now he didn't want to talk about it. He closed his eyes.
"Same darned thing,” she snapped.
"No. Not the same thing at all. I like kids, really. A lot."
"You ... you do?” Her voice broke.
He laughed sadly. “You sound almost disappointed by the fact."
Silence fell again.
"Now, Ashley, give me your new address so I can find you. I just want to talk to you.” Reese held his breath, waiting, pleased that the urgency he felt—the stark need to know where she was—wasn't in his voice.
"Twelve, twenty-four Westbridge Lane, Worthington,” Ashley recited automatically.
"Good girl. You don't live in Columbus now?"
"Yes. No, Worthington is a suburb north of Columbus, not far south of my parent's farm. Excellent schools, near the zoo."
He smiled. He wished he could see her. “I know how you love animals. All right then, I'll do an online map search. I'll be there early tomorrow. Go back to sleep, babe."
"Reese, did you ever read the letters I sent you four years ago?"
"No.” With that, he hung up.
Ashley held the phone to her ear a moment longer, stunned.
She scratched her head. Not darn likely she'd go back to sleep now.
Why on God's earth had she lied about Mandy? Saying she was her sister's child. What kind of person denied her own daughter that way? “A nervous, scared spitless kind of person, that's who,” she whispered aloud.
She still held the silent receiver in her hand. Even thoughts of work were gone now, replaced by stark, bloody, screaming panic of another, more personal kind.
Baby, indeed. How dare he storm back into her life while she was vulnerable and sleepy, calling her ba
by in that sexy male voice that seeped right through her, making her mindless body want him until it hurt. And making her lie like a slimy, evildoer in a bad movie. No. Honesty prevailed. He had not forced her to do anything. She selfishly wanted to stall.
Heck, why had she given him her address so willingly? He'd hypnotized her with that deep, rumbling voice. Apparently he didn't even need the extra whammy of his beautiful steel-gray eyes to render her witless, gushing female goo.
She had to think and think fast. No time to lose. Any other time, she could call her sister to take Mandy for the weekend. But not now. Emily and Don and their children were in Florida visiting the kid-related sites while the prices were affordable in the fall.
Reese said he liked children. Incredible. Maddening. And it brought a different, new worry. If true, would he try to take Mandy to Texas and away from her when he learned the truth?
Well, she'd wanted to make sure he knew about his daughter at last. That's why she'd called the lawyer and asked to meet with him after all these years. To see him was exactly what she wanted when she'd asked for a neutral meeting, wasn't it?
Well, it worked. Time to face the proverbial music.
She took in a deep, trembling breath.
Mandy asked about her father after all.
This was for her. About her.
"It's not about me,” she whispered.
She would get her daughter anything in her power to provide.
Crap, it had seemed a good plan at the time. She should have guessed Reese would be the unpredictable variable in the equation. That he'd mess with her orderly plans.
Suddenly, the fear of what might come from Reese's visit became an active, living entity crawling under her too-hot skin. She struggled to subdue the feeling, lifting their sleeping child back into her arms for the comfort of having Mandy close.
"Dinner's ready. Wake the little one,” Emma called from the kitchen. “If she sleeps too long, she won't sleep through the night, you know."
"True."
At that moment, Mandy blinked then opened her large eyes. “Smell meef loaf, Mommy?"
"Yes, sweetie, you do. Mrs. Carson made it for us."
"Oh, good. She cooks better than you do."
"Thanks so much."
"Sowwy.” Mandy shook her head solemnly. “I should not say that."
"It's okay, sweetie.” The little one giggled. Mandy was happy and rested after her nap and thrilled her mom wasn't holding a grudge over the sucky cooking comment.
Ashley steadied herself. What did she have to worry about anyway? Really? Reese didn't want a child. So, he wouldn't try to take Mandy away from her and he wouldn't demand all of a father's rights, would he?
Was she afraid of her own reaction to seeing him again?
You bettcha.
She shook in her shoes at the thoughts of acting a fool over Reese Caldwell all over again.
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Chapter Five
The next morning Ashley paced back and forth as she waited for Reese to arrive. He'd be early, she'd bet. He was always early, never late.
She wore a yellow silk dress. A frilly, feminine thing her mother had given her on her birthday last year. And she'd taken great care in applying cosmetics. She crossed her arms under her breasts. Why the pretty dress? Because Reese once said he liked her in yellow, that's why.
And she wanted to seduce him. One last time.
As to the cosmetics, she wanted to look and feel her best. Back when she'd moved here two years ago, Emma had given her a make over. She'd also recommended a good hair stylist. Keeping her hair cut in a shorter, bouncy trim, she looked very different from the mousy little scientist who barely remembered to comb her hair that Reese would remember. She even wore contacts now instead of the clunky glasses.
She counted on a couple of hours alone with Reese before the little one awoke and her long-delayed explanations began. She smiled a woman's secret smile. Perhaps to show him what he'd missed all these years.
She suspected when he learned the whole truth, that he had a daughter, he'd be one very angry Texan.
She ran a hand through her hair.
There wouldn't be a hole she could hide in. No doubt about it, a slow, merciless worse-than-death punishment would ensue. He'd never hurt her, not physically, she thought, returning from flights of exaggeration to solid reality. She knew that much about him.
A more likely outcome would be the return of the long days of life without him. She smiled sadly, blinking back tears. Heck, she had that state already. What worse could happen?
She straightened. Lots of parents shared children and were civil long term. But he wouldn't be human if he didn't see the situation of a child he'd not met in the light of some kind of betrayal.
Her heart urged her on with her plan to steal some time with him first. A woman could cram a lot of loving into the next couple of hours.
She'd once loved Reese Caldwell with all her heart. She'd known early in their relationship he was the only man for her, ever. She'd assumed sex was his motivation for pursuing her. Would that attraction be the same today? She flexed her fingers.
The buzzing doorbell jerked her from her thoughts. After a short walk that seemed to stretch to infinity, she opened the door.
Reese.
She smoothed her dress with a fluttering hand.
He stood there just as handsome and gloriously male as she remembered. He had on the kind of long-sleeved white shirt southern men wore so well, dressy black jeans and polished boots. He raised one of his large hands to casually prop himself against the door, waiting, watching her. For a moment she thought she saw a flash of uncertainty in his gray eyes, as if he was unsure of his welcome. She couldn't tell for sure. She searched his face. Then helplessly her eyes scanned his lean body. Heavens, he still looked great, same long, long legs she remembered, same board shoulders and flat abs.
"Ash?” he asked. “God, you look good, baby.” His allowed his gaze to range up and down and over her, too.
Baby? “Um, thank you."
"Will you allow me to come in, honey?” he asked when she forgot to offer for a beat too long.
Honey? Now he had the satisfied and determined expression of a man who'd made up his mind about something. A problem nearly all solved to his liking. All trace of the uncertainty she thought she'd seen moments ago had faded away now. He was on the offensive, the primitive hunter she'd always sensed him to be underneath his educated, civilized southern gentleman's veneer.
She raised a hand to her throat.
"Do you always open your door to strangers without asking who's there, Ash?” he demanded.
Her temper flared at his tone. “What a clichéd male question.” He'd spoken the words with a possessive concern that must've come down to him from ancient, Neanderthal ancestors. She put her hands on her hips. “I bet the ancient men told women in the same tone of voice to stay in the cave and not range farther than the nearest fruits and berries."
He grinned devilishly. “Maybe. Maybe. Sometimes the oldest principles are the best."
"Pfft.” She motioned for him to enter her house. “I'm sure those ancient women found it necessary to disobey on occasion. Besides, you're no stranger,” she said, lifting her chin, adding a touch of defiance to her voice, her eyes challenging his.
"How could you know it was me?” he asked in a tone loaded with tolerant exasperation but softened by a coaxing smile.
As Reese walked through the door, he turned and leaned into the doorframe, trapping her with his arms, as if settling in that way for a casual talk.
"I knew it was you."
"Oh? How? Do you have supernatural senses?"
She lifted her chin. “Maybe I do.” She hadn't meant to say that. “Maybe I'm a touch psychic. “I know things.” She spoke the truth. She carried a small touch of a seeing intuition that ran in her family. Her mom said they came from people with strange and special abilities—old family stories no one took very serious
ly—said that was why Ashley had a knack for coming up with so many fresh ideas for research.
Ashley caught Reese's eyes and smiled a smile she hoped radiated flirtation and seduction. She hoped. She'd never been much good at the femme fatale thing, but today she felt like trying. Hard.
To her surprise, his disapproving frown disappeared. He stepped back, looking almost shocked. Heavens, she didn't want to scare him away with wacky talk of her premonitions and her odd seductive behavior.
"You sound like Josie. Talking of psychic abilities,” he said at last.
"Actually, I learned to refine and focus my meager intuition while visiting with Josie four years ago. She has real foresight, much stronger than mine."
"Why did I not know that at the time?"
She shrugged. “I didn't want you to think I was nuts, I guess. How is Josie these days?"
"Great. She's great. Bossy as ever. You speak of all this seeing stuff as if it's normal.” He raised a brow in a charming expression.
"As a scientist, I see amazing things every day. I doubt very little."
He looked thoughtful. “Wouldn't surprise me a bit if you did have special abilities."
He grinned, clearly teasing her as he leaned closer and closer into her personal space. She felt his warm breath on her cheek.
"Always suspected you were a witchwoman of some sort. You had me under your spell, anyway."
She gasped. What had she started? “Nonsense. I'm not magical. Besides, I'm supposed to develop the scientific theories around here. Paranormal or otherwise."
He laughed a masculine chuckle. “If you ever want to research the topic, talk to Josie."
"I will. Actually, I'd love to document her abilities someday. For science. To try to find out how she sees the future with such uncanny accuracy."
He laughed. “I don't think she'd go for that."
"No. I guess not.” Ashley stepped away from him and indicated with a sweeping move of her hand that he should come the rest of the way into her house. She moved to lead the way. He grabbed her arm, gently stopping her forward movement. He pulled her to him. Heavens, he smelled good, like soap, like a man.
The Horseman's Heritage Page 4