“Nothing. Why?” she asked. She looked nervously around the room but seemed to relax when she saw the place was empty. She’d only been in his bar once when he first began leasing the space and that was when she was much younger. He had tried coaxing her back in on more than one occasion so she could see what he spent so much of his time trying to build, but she had always balked and found some reason not to come. So to see her now made him extremely nervous.
“You never come in here,” he said bluntly.
She looked pained for a moment and then she reached into her purse and put his phone on the counter. “I found this on the table when I got home today. I thought you might need it so I decided to bring it by.”
He relaxed when he saw the phone and then chuckled at his overreaction. Things had been off for so long between him and Savannah that he realized he was always walking on eggshells around her and had no idea what was going on in her life and in her head. Their contact had become so mechanical and non-committal that he had instantly jumped to the conclusion that something terrible had happened.
“How did we get here Savannah?” he wondered aloud.
He saw her stiffen. “What do you mean?” she asked carefully.
“How did we become strangers?” He pulled the phone across the bar and then set it aside. “Did I do something to make you pull away from me?”
She dropped her eyes, but he swore he saw moisture in them. She was silent for so long he was afraid she wouldn’t answer. “I’m just working through some stuff Logan. I just need a little more time.”
He nodded slowly, ignoring the constriction in his chest. He wanted to know more. No, he needed to know more – more about whatever had taken the light from her eyes so many years ago and caused her to turn away from him rather than towards him.
“Okay,” he said. “I can wait.”
She nodded and then suddenly reached out to grab his hand and gave it a hard squeeze. She let go before he could respond and then she turned to leave.
“Are you going out again tonight?” he called to her as she neared the door.
“Um, not sure – maybe. I’ll text you if I do.” She disappeared back into the bright light and then he was plunged into darkness once more as the door closed behind her.
“Was that your sister?” came a voice behind him. Sam was walking towards the bar, a box in his burly arms.
“Yeah, I left my phone at home so she was dropping it off.”
“I didn’t know she was back,” Sam commented as he began emptying the box. Sam Reynolds was older than Logan by more than twenty years but his business knowledge and support had saved Logan time and money on more than one occasion. He was a boisterous individual with a thick, deep voice that matched his portly figure – he looked like someone that spent a lot of time watching football on the big screen while downing a bucket of fried chicken. But it was an illusion. His friend was actually quite strong from years of lifting heavy bottles and kegs around, but he also had no problem partying with the patrons of the popular sports bar he ran on the other side of town. Logan had always wondered why his former boss was so willing to help him with the business since Logan’s goal was to have a bar that would ultimately be in direct competition with Sam’s. He supposed that was why the man had bought in as an investor – Logan had actually had to say no when Sam asked for fifty percent so they’d be equal partners.
Remembering Sam’s comment about Savannah, Logan said, “Yeah, she’s been back a few months now. Just started teaching over at the elementary school in Queen Anne. I think she’s dating the father of one of the kids in her class.”
“Good for her,” Sam responded as he placed the last bottle behind the bar and then grabbed the box and headed towards the storage area. “I’ll bring the rest of these up,” he said as he waved the box around.
“Thanks Sam,” Logan said as he went back to work on his laptop to try and find money that just wasn’t there.
***
“Babe, you here?”
Shane flinched at her high-pitched tone, but didn’t respond to Paige’s inquiry. He heard the snick of her shoes as she made her way to the bedroom where he waited on her perfectly made bed.
“There you are,” she muttered with irritation as she strode past him and disappeared into the bathroom. “Jerry’s gallery opening is tonight.” She reappeared in the bedroom looking exactly the same so Shane guessed she must have gone in there for one of her many daily make-up checks. She was dressed in a white pantsuit with sparkling diamonds and bright gold accessories. If it hadn’t been for the ugly red silk scarf she had draped around her thin neck, she could have easily blended into the wall, the nauseatingly white wall in yet another white room. “You should wear the Valentino tonight – the black one but not that god awful teal tie you like so much…it won’t go with my dress.”
She hurried passed him and into her walk in closet. He could see her searching the endless racks of clothes until she found the dress she wanted.
“Do you remember my brother?” he asked quietly.
“Um, yeah, sure,” she mumbled as she started scanning her shoe collection. “The fag, right?”
He fisted his hands at her slur. When she glanced at him and saw his reaction she tried to backpedal. “Well, that’s what everyone was saying about him at school.”
Shane stood and went to the closet door, his icy expression causing her to take a step back. He’d never struck a woman and he wasn’t going to now, but he’d never been more tempted.
“You know how he died?”
She nodded, but wisely kept her mouth shut.
“You know how he died, yet you keep leaving me your little gifts. Why?”
“Come on Shane,” she laughed. “I just thought you might want to loosen up a bit. Your brother was…” she stuttered to a halt at his dark look. “Look,” she began again. “You’re under a lot of pressure and I thought you might need a little help to unwind – be yourself again.”
“Be myself?” he repeated coldly.
She huffed in frustration and then grabbed a pair of shoes. “Can we do this later? I promised Jerry I’d be there for his speech.”
“There’s no later Paige.”
When she looked at him, he motioned with his head to his side of the massive closet. There were a few suits hanging there – the ridiculously expensive, designer ones that she had bought him – and several empty clothes hangers but nothing else. She studied the nearly bare rack for a moment and then laughed shrilly. “God, you’re such a loser Shane.” She began stripping off her clothes and he found it amusing that she did so while watching herself in the mirror. Her perfectly tanned and toned body did nothing for him.
“You think your folks will be okay with this?” she muttered as she worked the dress over her body. “Face it Shane, for whatever reason, we make sense together. You know any other woman who’s going to let you stick your dick into strangers for money because I sure don’t.”
“And what if I do it when there’s no money involved? Would that even bother you?”
She shrugged. “As long as you show up where and when I need you, I don’t care if you fuck every woman in the city.” She smoothed her hands over the dress and checked herself at different angles. “Hell, I actually like watching some of those hags you service turn all red when we walk into a place together – Cecilia Harrington actually asked me to co-chair a couple of her stuffy fundraising committees after she saw me with you – bitch has been snubbing me for years.”
Cecilia Harrington was a quiet, older woman whose wealthy husband had recently been diagnosed with dementia and often forgot who his wife even was. She’d caved under the stress of caring for a man in declining health and trying to run his many philanthropic organizations and had hired Shane for companionship more than a year ago. They’d been together only a few times, but he’d always thought she was nice. But it had never even occurred to him that Paige would stoop to blackmailing his customers. If he ever ran into any of them while
with Paige, he made sure to treat them like he’d never met them before but some, like Cecilia, weren’t good at hiding their surprise at seeing him within their own social circles.
“You’re a piece of work Paige.”
“Spare me, Shane. You’ve got a good thing going here – you want to try walking away from it, go ahead. But we both know you’ll be back. You haven’t come this far just to throw it all away.”
He heard her nasally voice drag on as he turned and left the closet and by the time he had grabbed his bag and left the bedroom, he knew she hadn’t even noticed his departure because she was still railing at him about how he was going to be sorry.
***
“Savannah?”
Savannah froze at the sound of Robert’s voice behind her. In the melee of the kids being dismissed for the day, she hadn’t heard him come into the room. Most of the kids had already torn out of the room to meet their parents but, Robert’s son, Nicholas, was busily packing up his belongings from the bin each child in the class had been assigned to keep their stuff in.
“Robert,” she managed to say pleasantly but her stomach churned. This man had seen her at her worst. It hadn’t appeared that he’d shared her bout of craziness with anyone at the school because she still had her job, but he had stopped bringing his son to class himself, instead tasking the child’s nanny with that chore.
“How are you?” he asked carefully.
She nodded almost violently and then tried to smile brightly. “I’m good, really good.”
“Good,” he said awkwardly and then paused. “I…I didn’t know after what happened,” he slowed and then stopped mid thought. “I’m sorry if I did something to frighten you,” he blurted out.
She was sure she her mouth was opening and closing like some demented fish struggling for air, but she couldn’t believe he was apologizing to her. “No, Robert, you did nothing wrong.”
He seemed visibly relieved and she realized what a truly nice man he was.
“Daddy, daddy!” Nicholas shouted as he ran up to his father and thrust a big, colorful piece paper into the man’s hands. “I painted today!”
Robert and Savannah both laughed when the still wet finger-paint smeared all over Robert’s hands and sleeve. “Wow, good job buddy. I love it!” he declared as he admired his son’s effort. “Why don’t you go find your jacket while I talk to Miss Bradshaw some more, okay?”
The little boy nodded heartily and then took off to do his father’s bidding.
“He’s an amazing boy, Robert. Your wife would be so proud of how you’re raising him.”
Robert’s eyes darkened with pain for a moment at the mention of his dead wife, but then he looked at his son and smiled. “Thank you. He can’t stop talking about you – you’re his favorite teacher.”
Savannah smiled and then went around to her desk to grab some hand wipes that she kept stashed there. “He’s really sweet – and such a talker,” she commented as she absently wiped at one of Robert’s paint covered hands.
“Savannah, I was wondering if you might want to try things again. We could go someplace quieter,” he offered.
She stilled at his words. The last thing she expected was him to ask her out on another date. He was so sweet and thoughtful and a few weeks ago she would have said yes – had in fact said yes. What she had with Shane wasn’t really a relationship, so saying yes to this man was what she should do – it would be the healthy thing to do.
“Robert,” she began as she wiped his other hand and then handed him a fresh wipe so he could get the rest.
“It’s okay,” he said, cutting her off. “You have someone else in your life…someone important,” he mused. When she just looked at him in surprise, he said, “Just a guess. You seem lighter than last time,” he finished and then carefully adjusted his son’s artwork so that he wouldn’t get any more paint on himself. “Nicholas, come on, time to go. Bye Savannah.”
“Bye Robert.” She watched him leave through the door on the far end of the room.
***
“You should have said yes.” Shane watched Savannah jump back in surprise at the sight of him in the doorway. He should have felt guilty for scaring her, but he was seething with too much jealousy to do much else besides stare at her. He’d heard her entire conversation with the sharply dressed young father from his spot at the second of two doorways that led into the classroom. He had figured out pretty quickly who the man was and it had taken everything in him not to stride into the room and stake his claim on Savannah. Robert was exactly what Savannah needed - handsome, responsible, clearly successful from the cut of his expensive suit and smart enough not to want to let a woman like Savannah get away, even after their disastrous first date. He hated the guy.
Savannah watched him silently, but her stony gaze was sending a clear message that she was pissed, not scared. He knew why. It had been nearly a week since their rendezvous in the hotel room and he hadn’t called or texted her. She didn’t need to know that he picked up the phone a dozen times, but always chickened out before completing the call. He’d written her some racy texts too and had imagined what she’d look like as she blushed while reading them. But he’d wimped out there too and canceled them all instead of sending them. But his body hadn’t stopped craving her and he’d finally given up the battle today during class when he’d actually found himself writing her name in his notebook like a teenage girl. And now he was here, watching her get asked out by another man and being both overjoyed and troubled when she declined.
“Why didn’t you say yes?” he finally asked as he stepped into the classroom. It was a large room, but surprisingly clean. He saw more than a dozen openings in the cubby shelf on the opposite side of the room and marveled that someone as young and quiet as Savannah could control and nurture that many kids at once. He’d seen her as the kids had run out of the room and nearly all had stopped to hug her. She had given each one a squeeze and some personal, endearing comment that left them hurrying out of the room with big, goofy grins on their little faces. He’d never really been around children, but even he knew she was a natural. And then she’d gone and touched Robert and any warm, fuzzy feelings left behind by watching her with the kids had dissolved into a jealous, simmering rage.
“You know why,” she responded. She crossed her arms over her chest and he knew she wasn’t going to make it easy for him to get back in her good graces. The twisted side of him was excited to have to convince her though.
“He’s perfect for you.”
“He’s not you.” The response nearly knocked him to his knees. He actually stopped and stared at her. Warning bells blared in his head. He’d held onto a shred of hope that she wasn’t becoming too emotionally attached to him, but her response made it clear that she was already in deeper than she should be.
“Savannah-” he began, but she put up a hand to cut him off.
“Don’t Shane. I don’t want to hear it.” She started moving around the room and snatching up discarded toys and art supplies. “You’ve made yourself clear about what our relationship is and isn’t. But I’m not going to lie about how I feel…I’m already lying too much as it is.”
He felt a pang of guilt at her reference. Since Logan hadn’t shown up to kick his ass, he had already figured she was still keeping her brother in the dark, but he could see now how hard that was for her.
“You could tell him,” he said quietly as he leaned down to pick up some kind of building block toy at his feet.
“I have to be able to tell him everything and I’m just not there yet.”
“He’ll understand why you kept it from him Savannah,” he offered.
She didn’t respond, just kept cleaning up.
“Do you remember what you asked me in the hotel room last weekend?” She looked up at him, clearly not sure what he was referring to. He took a few steps closer to her. “You asked me if I needed you to ease the knot in my stomach – the one that never goes away. Do you remember?”
S
he nodded, but remained silent.
“Did you hear my answer?”
“I’ve been trying to convince myself that you didn’t say yes,” she whispered as he reached her.
“I did say it. And that pain does ease when we’re together, but it comes back worse every time because I know that no matter what I say or do, you are going to get hurt. Nothing you say will convince me that you can walk away from this unscathed.” He palmed her cheek, rubbing the rough pad of his thumb against her silky skin. “But I’m such a bastard that I’m going to take what you’re giving and try to figure out how to live with the regret and guilt after you’re gone.”
When he brushed his lips over hers, he heard her sigh and then she was wrapping around him, instantly welcoming him against her body. Her mouth opened beneath his and he kissed her every way he could think of, soft and hard, fast and slow, shallow and deep.
“How about we get some coffee?” he said against her lips as he forced himself to pull back. “Otherwise I’m going to try out my newest fantasy of spreading you out on your desk and-” he began, but she laughed and slapped her hand over his mouth.
“There could still be parents around.” As she pulled her hand back, she brushed her thumb tantalizingly over his lips and then pulled back. “I’ll get my stuff.”
Chapter 12
“Why did your parents move to Chicago?” Savannah asked as she watched him take a sip of his coffee. She’d followed him in her car to a small deli near his apartment that also served espresso. They’d been lucky enough to grab one of the back tables away from the counter so it was relatively quiet.
“I’d like to say it was because they needed a fresh start after Michael, but they’re motives were more financial and social than anything else.”
“What do you mean?”
“My father got an offer from a former colleague to start a practice together. The firm does mostly criminal defense law, but throws in some Pro Bono stuff on the side. In exchange, my mom gets to sit on several boards of the different charities my father’s company ‘gives back to’ so it’s a win-win for both of them.” She didn’t miss the condemnation in his tone.
Shane's Fall (The Escort Series Book 2) Page 12