by Unknown
Her reactions to him since meeting her in person had made him begin to think that perhaps he’d been wrong. Those reactions were why he had talked to Reaper about cutting back on his shifts at Ink Bandits. He’d told Reaper that she didn’t sleep unless she knew he was there and since Sammy was his old lady’s best friend, Reaper had allowed him to cut back on his shifts. He didn’t need the credits he made at Ink Bandits anyway. He made enough off the club and his one-sixth of Spangles to still be in the black. He loved art and he was good at inking, so he worked at Ink Bandits.
Sammy was good at art too he’d discovered a few months ago when she’d drawn a tattoo for Sarah. He’d done the work because he’d wanted to know that he’d inked her work on her friend and not someone else. He shook his head at his own idiocy because the part of himself that he called the beast was possessive to a degree he wasn’t comfortable with. That was why he had inked the reaper she’d drawn on Sarah.
Possessiveness.
Again, they were in a strange relationship. He ran a hand over his thick reddish brown hair before leaning his head into the tree in defeat.
Staying neutral towards Sammy wasn’t working anymore. He was becoming beyond possessive of her and he felt like his dick was going to punch a hole in his pants almost constantly when she was near. She was sexy as fuck and he wanted so badly to collar her. It was fucked up because she was still not part of the lifestyle he was. Not the dominant lifestyle but the biker one. The whole club dynamic confused her and she seemed to resent the fact that they were trying to take care of her. It was what family did and that was part of the reason he’d joined the Bandits to start with. They looked out for one another even as they lived and let live.
Animal shifted against the tree, his boot propped on the rough bark. The nights out here in the dark were uncomfortable and by the time someone else took over watching her at seven he was barely able to stumble onto his bike and head home.
He would catch about five hours sleep and then head over to the diner if she was working or her house if she wasn’t. He’d make sure she ate something because whatever that sick fuck had done to her had made her refuse to eat. She hadn’t been heavy but she used to have curves that made him want to weep. Now she looked a bit angular in her face and he would bet she had lost about twenty pounds. It made him angry that her beauty was being marred by something the putz had done to her. If he ever found that son of a bitch he was going to fucking rip his intestines out and feed them to him. Pacing back and forth in his chest, the beast roared his agreement.
Animal wasn’t sure why Sammy being hurt made him think of doing things he hadn’t done since before he’d joined the Blue Bandits. Who he’d been before he came to this town four years ago wasn’t pretty and he’d thought he’d left that part of his life in the dirty room on the side of route nine when he’d done something he’d regret till the day he died.
The only time that part seemed to take over was if a woman was being abused. With Sammy it was different because he knew that if anything happened to her he would react that way. He had almost cut Rebel up for insulting her the other day. If she hadn’t stopped him, he might have done it. Sammy had stepped between them, making his focus shift from killing to sex.
He was glad what had happened that night four years ago had woken him up and made him realize that he was following a very dark path; he still couldn’t forgive himself for it. He’d left the Headhunters MC the very next morning and never looked back. He’d shown up here broken and cold. He’d met Pansy in a bar on the other side of town. He had been returning from a run and stopped to get a burger. Animal had been at the bar nursing a whiskey, wondering if it was worth living with the knowledge of what he had done.
Pansy had sat down next to him. He hadn’t spoken until after his food came.
Then he’d asked, “You any good at Ink?”
“What?” he’d asked, looking at the man with dark red hair and eerie light green eyes.
“Ink?” he asked, pointing to the tat Animal had on his arm.
“Oh, yeah. I’ve done Ink before. Why? You need a tat?” Animal had asked, thinking he could use some more credits if he decided to stick around. He’d been doing Ink for the Headhunters for over three years. He hadn’t known it at the time but Pansy had known that already.
Pansy had recognized the tattoo of a tiger trying to claw through the skin on his forearm because the Headhunters were looking for him. They wanted him back and weren’t happy about his desertion. Once a member, always a member was every MC’s motto. Only when that faithfulness wasn’t returned, you did what you had to. It wasn’t like that with the Bandits and since joining, he’d never thought of leaving.
Pansy had saved his life that night and Animal would be grateful for Pansy’s interference for the rest of his life.
“We’re looking for an artist. Come by Ink Bandits tomorrow.” He then ate his dinner without another word. Animal had watched him warily but Pansy hadn’t said anything else until he stood to leave.
“Sometimes we have things we don’t like about ourselves. Those things shape us into the man we could be. Come to the shop. Might surprise you.” Then he’d left, Animal looking after him wondering what the hell the man knew about him. The next morning he had been on his way out of town when he saw a sign for Ink Bandits. He’d pulled in the parking lot and gone inside. That was when he had discovered that even a broken man could belong somewhere.
Animal shifted again, looking at the window to Sammy’s bedroom, his mind circling back to the woman inside the room and what had happened to her. He knew that she’d been hurt but no one, not even Sarah, had been able to get her to talk about it. It was making him feel a little savage. He wanted to kill the son of a bitch but if she wouldn’t tell him who he was, how could he?
Sammy was still losing weight and she seemed frightened all the time, but the thing that disturbed him most was Spangles. Having watched her for over six months, he knew that her behavior about sex and bondage had changed. She used to come into the club and dance with abandon for hours before she went home with her preferred dominant, mostly from a small group of three men she was used to.
Only one night she’d tried a new one and that son of a bitch had broken her trust and likely hurt her. He wanted to murder the man every time she sat at the table in the corner at Spangles, pale as a sheet with her hands clutching a glass of whiskey as she desperately pretended she didn’t need release, although they both knew she did.
It infuriated him.
Every time he watched her sit there, he boiled with a rage so deep he felt it in his bones.
Animal looked at the silent house, his eyes scanning the perimeter looking for anything out of place, only settling when he saw nothing out of the ordinary. He knew he was getting too engaged with Sammy and he didn’t do that. Not since––well, not since that night when he’d made a mistake.
She wasn’t for him. He was damaged and she didn’t need that on top of her other issues, but the thought of her with another man now made him feel a bit untamed. He suddenly wanted to rip the faceless man’s nuts off. It was why he should turn this over to Pansy or Iron, but he couldn’t seem to do it.
He’d tried a week ago to just let them take over. He had lasted about an hour at home pacing and wondering what the hell was going on and if she was safe. He ended up riding over here to her place. He had walked toward this tree where Pansy had been standing. He looked towards the apartment seeing her standing at the window looking out. She was a few feet from the curtain and he knew she thought whoever was out here didn’t see her, but he did. Pansy had nodded at him.
“Animal,” he had said.
“How long has she been there?” he asked, knowing Pansy could see her too.
“Hour,” Pansy replied.
“She was waiting,” Animal said, realizing that she knew he was supposed to be there and she had been waiting on him to show.
“Yep, seems to like when you’re here. Might do you both good. You
look frazzled and I suspect that’s ‘cause you need to be here as much as she needs you here,” Pansy told him, stepping out of the darkness.
“You know I’m not right for her. I can’t be here for her,” Animal told him.
“Seems to me that it’s time to let the past go and take a chance on the future. We’ve all done things. I know I have, but at some point we have to let it go and hope that we can do enough good to outweigh it,” Pansy told him.
“Pansy, I know you think that everyone should get a second chance but not me. Trust me, I don’t deserve it. I am not for her. I need to walk away.”
Animal stared at the window where she stood waiting. He knew what she was waiting on and he knew that he shouldn’t give in to the urge to give her what she needed so she would go to bed and rest. She should learn not to rely on him but even as that thought entered his head, he lifted his hand and waved to her silently. He saw her body relax and after only a second she was gone from the window.
“No, you’re right where you need to be, Animal,” Pansy said before he walked away, leaving Animal to stew about his need to be here for her and the fact that he couldn’t get her sexy ass out of his head.
Sighing, he stared at the apartment wall that separated them and wondered what the hell he was thinking. If he had even a lick of common decency, he’d call someone else to watch her place and forget she existed. Only he knew even as the thought curled around inside his head that he wasn’t going anywhere. Common decency apparently wasn’t his strong suit.
Chapter 2
Sammy woke to the sound of a bike roaring away from her apartment and sat up. That was Animal leaving, she knew because he always left just after dawn. She normally woke up when she heard it and knew that sleep was done for her. Sighing, she walked into the bathroom headed to the shower. Turning it on because it took forever to heat up, she went back into her room for her clothes. She climbed into the thankfully hot shower a few moments later, letting the hot water soothe her as she turned her face up into it.
Feeling refreshed a few minutes later, she stepped out of the shower pulling on a pair of light blue shorts and her favorite white top she began blow-drying her hair. When she was done, she stepped out into her bedroom and nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard a thump from the direction of her living room.
She peeked out the curtain seeing that Rebel was standing against the tree outside and Iron was with him. Whoever was in her apartment must be someone they knew, otherwise they’d be in, drawn which meant it was either Animal or Sarah. Since Animal had just left, she’d bet it was the latter of the two and she sighed. She really wasn’t in the mood for a lecture today.
Knowing that if she didn’t go out there soon Sarah would come get her, she stepped out into the small hall and entered the living room to see Sarah and Josh. Sammy smiled when Josh jumped up on his tiny legs and darted towards her.
“Ant Sam, Ant Sam,” the little boy called, jumping into her arms when she held them out to him.
“Hey, sweetie,” she said, kissing the boy’s blonde head.
“We came to take you shopping,” Sarah said smiling. Sammy knew that she didn’t mean the type of shopping they normally did. Sarah had come over every week to make sure she went and got groceries. Sammy scowled at her as she held a chattering Josh. He was telling her about his new truck that Reaper had given him. She made the appropriate oohs and ahs as he told her, his little hand showing her different things that the toy did. She also managed to glare at Sarah, who glared right back.
After Josh finished telling her about the new toy, she finally told Sarah in a clipped tone, “I can manage to go to the store for myself, you know.”
“Yes, and if you didn’t only buy salad and fruit that you do your best not to eat, I wouldn’t push you to get more.” Sarah looked daggers at her with her hands on her hips and a stubborn lift of her chin. Sammy set Josh, who was wiggling to get down, on his feet before she glanced at Sarah again, her temper stirring.
“I can take care of myself! I don’t need you or any of the Blue Bandits to tell me what to do, Sarah. I’m a grown-ass woman!” Sammy growled, trying to keep her voice low so she didn’t scare Josh.
“I would agree with that if you weren’t acting like a spoiled little girl!” Sarah roared, not moderating her tone.
“Uh-oh, mean face,” Josh said, walking over to hug his mother trying to calm Sarah down.
“I know that my choices lately are worrying you so I won’t be pissed at you for that comment. I will however tell you it’s none of your business.”
“I’m your best friend, Sammy. You’ve lost over thirty pounds in the last four months by not eating and it’s not safe. You have to get over whatever that jerkoff did to you and move on!” Sarah was holding Josh and she looked desperate.
Sammy knew that Sarah was right, she been losing about six to seven pounds every two weeks and she knew it wasn’t healthy. Only she wasn’t able to say she was sorry to see the pounds falling off. She’d had to buy clothes two sizes smaller and since she’d been a size sixteen, that meant now she was a twelve, which was a size she hadn’t been since she was twenty-five.
“That’s easy for you to say when you have no idea what he did to me!” She screamed so loudly that Josh covered his ears and began crying. It made her feel like a shrew but she was just so angry. They kept telling her to get over it, that she needed to let it go, and she was trying but it wasn’t working. Did they think she enjoyed being a victim?
She didn’t. She hated it.
She wanted so badly to just let it all go and go back to the way she was before when she was happy with herself and the way she’d looked. Her insides trembled and she turned away, facing the windows, trying her best not to burst into tears.
“Whose fault is that, Sammy? I can’t remember the number of times I’ve asked you what happened. I want to understand why you’re doing this to yourself but I can’t until you tell me!” She bounced Josh on her hip trying to calm him. “Let me take him outside. Then we can talk,” Sarah said when she’d finally calmed him down.
“No, I don’t want to talk,” Sammy told her angrily, her hand slicing through the air in front of her as her agitation grew.
“Too fucking bad,” Sarah said as she exited the door and waved Iron and Rebel over. They took Josh from her and she stepped back in, closing the door. Sammy suddenly wished her friend hadn’t met Reaper. Once she’d met him, a part of her personality that Sammy found she wasn’t fond of had reappeared.
Sarah used to be quiet and non-confrontational but since she’d met Reaper, she had become a mouthy badass. Sammy had known that a part of Sarah was hiding just beneath the surface of that quiet demeanor. She just hadn’t realized that Sarah was a fierce tigress more than she was a kitten. She’d thought Sarah might have a little bit of a bite to her but she had no idea how much.
It was annoying.
Sarah turned to face Sammy, who rushed to assure her. “Sarah, I don’t want to fight with you about this. I am trying not to allow what he did to shape my life but it isn’t easy.” She ran a hand over her face before dropping into the chair nearby.
“I know and talking about it will help, Sammy. Talk to me,” Sarah pleaded.
“I can’t.”
“Yes, you can. I’m not going to judge you. Whatever the son of a bitch did is on him, not you.” Sarah plopped down on the couch across from her staring at her.
“I know,” Sammy whispered, burying her head in her hands. She wasn’t ready to tell her friend what she’d allowed. What her sexual proclivities had led her to. She didn’t know if she would ever be ready.
“Then why won’t you talk about it? You know that as soon as you tell me who the man is Reaper will take care of him. Nobody is going to judge you. We love you.”
“You won’t understand.”
“If you mean I won’t understand because it involved bondage, then I think you’re underestimating me. I may not enjoy it but I do know what happens and ha
ve even tried a few things when I was younger. Don’t tell Reaper though. He’d get all savage and insist I do it with him so he can show me the man did it wrong.”
Sammy couldn’t help it, she started laughing because she knew her friend wasn’t kidding about Reaper’s reaction to finding out that she’d tried bondage with another man. Reaper was crazy possessive of Sarah. It seemed to be worse now that he knew that he loved her.
Sarah had to restrain him a few weeks ago when he’d met Lewis, a man she had dated when she was twenty. He’d come in to get a tattoo and seen Sarah. Lewis hadn’t realized that she was off limits and he had hugged her, spinning her laughing form around. Reaper had come from the back at that moment before Animal and Stitch could tell Lewis he was going to get himself killed.
Reaper had roared, “What the fuck is going on here?” before ripping Sarah out of Lewis’s arms. Sarah had gone willingly and told him to relax, rubbing his back. He’d barked at her to give him an explanation fast.
Sarah told him that the man was an old friend to which the idiot had said, “More than that, surely. We dated off and on for over two years.”
That was when Reaper reached for the gun. Of course Sarah had already handed it off to Pansy who now stood behind them. Sarah told Lewis that she was married to Reaper. She wasn’t but by club law, her wearing his patch meant the same thing and it had calmed Reaper down a bit. After that, things had gone smoothly and Lewis had left with all his limbs intact and a new tattoo. Later that night Sarah said that Reaper had teased her into telling him every position she could remember having sex with Lewis. Then he’d shown her over the next week why Lewis had been doing each one wrong.
It had been a funny story. She’d witnessed the scene at the parlor but the sex stuff had been hilarious. Reaper was a little nuts when it came to Sarah, but she seemed to love every minute of the man’s crazy. Sammy was glad. Her friend had had a rough life and she wanted her to be happy.
“Maybe I should,” she said, laughing harder.