by Tonya Clark
Jayden: Travis still hasn’t woken up but is in a room now. They are done running tests on him for tonight. Charliee had to have fifteen stitches on her knee and has a fracture. Haven’t seen either yet. Charliee was wheeled right into Travis’s room and won’t leave. We are hoping in an hour or, so they will let us in to see him.
It isn’t a lot to go on about Travis but a least he is in a room now. I’m still a little confused on how Charliee got hurt. I have questions, but I don’t ask any of them. Sitting here for two hours has given me a lot of time to think. It is amazing how fast life can change. I can’t believe how fast mine has changed. First losing our parents. Coming back to Washington. Raising a teenager. Meeting Jayden. Bringing Steve on as a partner. My life went from all work and only having myself to take care of to being completely flipped the other way and not having a second of time to myself.
When I first got back to the truck tonight after talking to Jayden, I had convinced myself I was over trying to make this thing between us work. I was pissed. How could Jayden think I would come here at a time like now and be shallow enough to not be worried about our friends and only thinking about our little fight? Sure, we have things to talk about. I would hope she knows me better than to think that is what I thought was more important right now.
Were things between us ever going to be easy? It always feels like we would have things going great, but then there would be that one moment and everything would blow up. We never just argued and talked things out, our fighting world usually has Jayden storming away from me and me chasing her down to apologize. I know relationships have ups and downs but ours is getting a little crazy. I’ve asked myself many times this week and a few times in the last couple of hours sitting out here if this is all worth it.
Then I think back to this week without her. I hated not having her with me on the drive from Texas. I would drive longer than was probably safe for myself and others around me before I would finally pull over and get a little sleep just because I wanted to get back and clear things up with her.
Today when I saw her on the news, my world stopped. Sure, I saw her jump into the back of that ambulance, but I didn’t know if she was hurt or if another bomb would go off while she was there. All I knew was I wasn’t there to protect her and that was a feeling I didn’t like. There are no words to describe how I felt when I entered that hospital and saw her standing there in the waiting room. She was safe and unharmed. I don’t think I took a solid breath until that moment.
Then she attacked. Accusing me of being selfish basically. After the first hour of sitting here had passed, I thought about just going home and waiting there to hear how Travis and Charliee were doing. I figured I could just come back later if I needed to. Then I realized that no matter how mad I was at Jayden for thinking so little of me, if something would happen to either of our friends, I wanted to be here for Jayden. I may not be sitting inside with everyone else, but Jayden knew I was here if she needed me.
My phone goes off once more, notifying me of a text.
Jayden: Going in to see Charliee. Do you want to come with me?
I have to read it a couple times to make sure I am reading it right. Jayden is asking me if I want to go with her. One thing it does confirm is she does in fact know I am still here if she needs me.
Cameron: Go ahead without me. Tell Charliee I’m here if they need anything. Call if you need or hear anything else about how Travis doing. I’ll come and visit them when things calm down. Their family being with them is more important right now.
That was hard! I’m sure me saying no about going in with her has Jayden’s mind spinning. She probably thinks I’m still mad at her and sitting here pouting over it. I do want to make sure family can spend all the time they can with the two right now, that’s more important than me going in. Before I can change my mind because of worrying what Jayden is thinking, I start up the truck and pull out of the driveway.
Chapter 26
Jayden
I must have read Cameron’s text at least three times. Maybe I thought the words would change if I just kept reading it. He is mad at me. Can I blame him? I basically accused him of being selfish and unfeeling. I’m worried, tired, and if I’m being completely honest right now, very frustrated at Charliee for the stunt she pulled today. I took it all out on Cameron when he showed up.
When the nurse came in and told us we could go up and see the two of them now, I texted Cameron right away. I knew he was still in the parking lot waiting to hear any news. Travis’s and Charliee’s parents had all gone up right away. Charliee wasn’t leaving Travis’s side so they told both parents they could go up together. I told them I would go up after they were done.
We are still waiting to hear more from Bryce and Derrick about the guy who is responsible for the bombings. Bryce had been able to send a quick text out, but all it said was everything was under control. Hopefully that means they caught the guy. I’m sure it is still going to be a while before either one of them are going to make it here to the hospital. I did send them a text whenever we got any news from the doctors just so they didn’t worry.
I am alone in the waiting area now. I’m sure the parents will all be up there for some time. Cameron is out in the parking lot. Maybe I should go out and talk to him, clear things up. Apologize for how I treated him earlier.
Walking outside, I scan the parking lot for his truck. I even walk around a little, but I don’t see Cameron’s truck or his father’s company truck. He left! My heart drops. I think I may have screwed things up pretty good between us this time. I fight back the tears, maybe I should try and call him.
Pulling out my phone, I am searching for his number when someone touches my shoulder from behind. Jumping and almost throwing my phone across the parking lot, I turn to find Karen and Steven, Charliee’s parents.
“Jayden, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I called your name a couple of times, but you didn’t answer.” Karen looks at me concerned.
“Sorry, I was in my own head. How is Charliee doing? Is Travis awake?”
Karen shakes her head. “No, Travis isn’t awake. Charliee looks exhausted. I’m sure she is in pain, but you know how she is, she won’t say that she is. Are you all right?”
Nodding is all I can do to answer her. I am pretty sure she isn’t buying it though. Karen knows me probably just as well as my own mom knows me.
Karen searches my face for a moment, but I am relieved when she doesn’t ask anything else about it. “Go up and see Charliee. We are going to her house and grab some stuff since she isn’t leaving.”
“Do you want me to go instead? That way you guys can be here with her just in case anything changes,” I ask.
“No, we will go, you go and see her. Travis’s parents are back in the waiting room making phone calls to the family with updates. Charliee needs to see you and I’m thinking you need to see her.”
I need to choke her is what I need to do, I think to myself. “All right, I’ll head up. If you need anything, call me. If anything changes while you are gone, I’ll let you know.”
Karen gives me a hug, Steven waves as they walk away hand in hand.
Charliee has her eyes closed when I walk into the room. The wheelchair she is sitting in is pushed as close as it can get next to the bed Travis is laying in, her hand holding his. I stand just inside the doorway watching them for a moment. You couldn’t have put a more perfect couple than these two together. Both of them are very caring of others and giving. I’d put money on the fact that they have never had a fight. They are the complete opposite from Cameron and me.
Charliee looks exhausted. I am about to leave and let her rest when Levi sits up. His movements cause his leash that Charliee is holding to move, which in turn wakes her up. Her eyes instantly go to Travis. She takes a deep breath and sits back in her chair when she realizes he is still asleep. It breaks my heart to see the pain in her eyes. It makes all the frustrations I have been feeling
over her risking her own life today just disappear.
She looks over at me, giving me her best effort of a smile. “Hey, how long have you been standing there? Why didn’t you wake me?” she signs.
She must be tired if she is only signing. It seems easier for her than talking sometimes. No thinking required, I guess you can say.
“You are tired, you need your rest. Go back to sleep, I’ll come back later. I just wanted to check on you myself,” I sign back.
She sits there for a moment just staring at me. “What’s wrong?”
She doesn’t need to hear about my petty problems with my boyfriend when her boyfriend is lying in a hospital bed.
“I’m good. Just been a long day,” I sign.
She gives me that look. The one that says, “You’re lying through your teeth.”
“Don’t worry about it. I’ll figure it out later. How are you doing?” I try to steer the conversation away from me.
“I’m on some strong pain medications, so the pain isn’t that bad right now. I keep falling asleep though.”
“You probably need sleep, Charliee. How about I take Levi outside for a small walk, and you get some rest?” I walk over and hold my hand out for Levi’s leash.
Charliee just shakes her head no and eyes the chair next to her. “Have a seat.”
I’m not getting away from her, so I plop down in the chair. “Really, it’s not important right now.”
“Jayden, you look defeated. I’m not doing much right now, and I need my mind distracted from all of this.” She waves her hand between her leg and Travis laying in the bed.
She is talking more now, but still signing, which means she is waking up a little more.
“I think I screwed things up with Cameron pretty good today.”
“What happened?”
“I should probably tell you the whole story.” I start back at the beginning with what happened in Texas and me coming home early, and then finish it with our fight downstairs today.
“Before I came up here, I asked if he wanted to come up with me to see you guys. He said he would come by later when everything with the parents settled down,” I sign as I speak. Charliee looks ready to fall back to sleep, I’m not even sure if she caught much of what I was telling her.
“So, you have been home since Sunday and didn’t call me with all of this?”
Well, so much for thinking she wasn’t catching the story. She is awake enough.
“I didn’t want to complain about Cameron and get you all pissed at him because let’s face it, you would have taken my side, then clear everything up with him and you be mad at him.”
“What else has happened that you haven’t told me about?” Charliee asks, looking a little disappointed.
I can’t take anymore disappointment from people today. First Cameron and now Charliee.
“Come on, Charliee, you have been crazy busy with your perfect relationship. You don’t need to hear about my crazy confusing one.”
The confusion and hurt that shoots across Charliee’s face makes me want to slap myself. I am lashing out again, like I did at Cameron earlier today. What the hell is my problem?
“Charliee, I’m sorry. That came out wrong.”
She doesn’t say anything. She just looks at Travis, then back at me. She looks around the room. She is fighting the tears.
“Don’t cry, I’m sorry…”
She cuts me off. “No, I’m the one who’s sorry, Jayden. You’re right. I have been very wrapped up in Travis and our relationship. I haven’t paid enough attention to what’s going on around me with everyone else. You’re my best friend, actually more like a sister. I should have been paying more attention. No, actually I should have made you talk to me more. I noticed you’ve been distracted, not fully yourself. I knew something was going on. I just didn’t want to push you. I figured you would tell me when you needed me. I should have known better with the way you are and for that, I’m sorry.”
“Charliee, I haven’t exactly been calling you with all of the stuff going on either. We have both been distracted lately.”
Leaning over, I give her a hug. My heart breaks when I notice she is hugging me with one arm, the other hand still tightly in Travis’s. How selfish can I be? Here she is sitting next to her boyfriend, who is unconscious, and we have no idea if and when he will be waking up, and here I am complaining about my relationship. What kind of friend am I?
“For right now why we don’t concentrate on Travis and you getting better and not my crazy love life?”
She is shaking her head no as I speak. “We aren’t going anywhere.” She points between herself and Travis. “And you aren’t leaving until we have everything figured out, so start talking, my friend, and I mean start from the beginning. If I start to fall asleep, don’t take it personally and just nudge me.”
Chapter 27
Cameron
I have been driving for at least an hour before I pull into the cemetery. Pulling up alongside the curb, I take a couple deep breaths. I haven’t been here since the day I drove here and just sat in my truck. I haven’t been up to the area where they are buried since the day we laid them to rest. Walking up to their area, I bend down and wipe off their headstone. Only one, with a picture of the two of them on it. There was never any other thought of two different headstones. My parents meant the world to each other. I remember catching my dad staring at my mom like she was the most beautiful woman in the world when she would be cooking in the kitchen or talking to someone else. Every time my mom would look at my dad, she had a spark in her eye. Their kind of love not everyone finds. They weren’t perfect, I’m sure they had bumps in their marriage, they just never showed it to us boys. Sure, they had their little arguments, but I can honestly say I never saw my parents fight.
I remember back when I was probably sixteen or seventeen. We were getting ready to eat dinner. Jacob and I were already sitting at the table, Mom had just brought a plate over of some kind of dish, and Dad had just come in to join us. Before he sat down, he came up behind Mom, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her. Not a peck, nothing deep, just an “I love you for everything you do to take care of us” kind of kiss.
Jacob had signed to me, “Gross.” I just laughed, but I remember asking them that night if they ever fought. My dad smiled, gave my mom one quicker kiss on the cheek and sat down. My mom said, “Nothing is ever perfect, hon, but we keep it between us. We never go to bed mad at each other and we always tell the other, or show,” she laughed and pointed at my father, “each other how much we love the other as often as we can. You never know what life will bring, you don’t want to regret or wonder if that person you love questions your feelings.”
I stare down at the picture of the two of them. I find it funny how that is the memory I am having at this moment. I know I’ve changed in the last few months. Who wouldn’t have with all of this? I’ve never been the emotional kind of guy. Mom use to tell me it was all right to not always be the strong one. Women like to see a softer side of guys sometimes. Lately I feel like a damn time bomb. I feel like everything is being thrown at me and every one of them I’m throwing back messed up or I missed catching altogether.
“I’m a twenty-eight-year-old man who needs his parents right now.”
“We always need our parents, there isn’t an age limit to that need.” The soft voice comes from behind me.
I feel myself jump a little. I had no idea anyone was around. No one was here when I got here. I turn around to find a lady who looks to be about my mother’s age.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to eavesdrop on your conversation.”
I hadn’t even realized I had spoken out loud. She is standing in front of two headstones. One looks to have been there for a while. The other, however, is new, along with the plot in front of it. You can still see where the grass was pulled up and set back in place.
She points over at my parents’ headstone. “I’m sorry for
your loss. The other day when we buried my father, I must have stayed here for three or four hours after everyone left. I couldn’t leave, I felt like if I did he would be gone to me forever. I walked around a little and your parents caught my attention. They were young and just from that picture you could tell very much in love.”
I am at loss for words. I just stand there staring at the woman.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have interrupted or butted in.” She starts to turn and walk away.
“Don’t apologize.” I finally am able to speak.
She turns back to me. “I’m sorry for being rude, you kind of caught me off guard. I didn’t know you were there. I’m sorry for your loss.” I point down at her father’s headstone.
“Thank you. Dad and I lost my mom when I was very young, car accident. My dad was my everything.” She points at the newer looking headstone. “I couldn’t have imagined losing both of them at the same time.” She points over at my parents’ stone.
“Yeah, it’s definitely a life changer.” I turn to look at their picture again.
“My dad used to tell me when I was having a rough day over my mom, to always remember she is never gone. She is with me every day because of the things she taught me and the love she had for me. I may not see her but she will be walking next to me guiding me for the rest of my life. Our parents may allow us to stumble. They have to so that way we learn to stand on our own two feet, but never fall. That goes for them being here physically or in our hearts.” She smiles sadly.
I watch as she blows a kiss to each of her parents’ stones and then just turns and walks away without saying another word. Turning back to my parents, that’s when something my father once told me comes to me.
“Nothing is meant to be easy, son, in life, love or work. You need to work hard to get it and you need to continue working hard to keep it.”
The woman’s words hit me. “The lessons they taught me and the love they showed.”