by Calinda B
“Yeah, well, in my defense she’d said it was cool, that she and Jace had an arrangement.” He gave his sister a wan smile. “And Jace and I have sorted things. Anyway, I heard my brother and his dining partner getting into an argument. I told Nora she had wine or something on her shirt and she should wash it off so it didn’t stain. She didn’t, I merely wanted her to head for the bathroom so I could eavesdrop. And like the narcissistic dumb bunny she is, she took off like a rocket.”
He chuckled. “So then I hear the other marine who came in with Lawless telling him he should report him to their commanding officer and he had every intention of doing it unless…” Zed lowered his voice, glancing right and left to make sure no one was around.
Caitlin leaned over the table to hear him.
“Unless Lawless paid him off.”
“Oh, my God, you’re kidding me.” Caitlin finished her beer and reached for her water.
“No, I’m not. Why would I make this up? I’m sitting in the booth thinking, shit, shit, shit, how am I going to get out of here without him seeing me? I figured he’d go ballistic if he knew I heard, and you know what a temper he has.”
Caitlin’s head nodded up and down vigorously.
“But there’s more.”
“Tell me.”
His jaw worked side to side, as he contemplated his next words. “Here’s the sick part. You know how he told the story of how his sharp shooting skills saved the day?”
“Yeah,” Caitlin said, her eyes wide. “They didn’t?”
“Nope. That’s what the payoff was about.” Zed lifted his heavy mug and drained it, wondering if he needed another. Remembering he had to drive, he thought better. “He choked. Captain America choked on the battlefield. He was supposed to hit his target from one hundred meters away and get out, but he lost his nerve.
“It should have been easy, like shooting the side of a barn. The spotter with him saw what was happening, and took the shot. All hell broke out and a firefight ensued. The spotter dragged Lawson away from the fray, into the building where they’d been positioned, out of harm’s way, while Lawson was whimpering like a baby, or that’s how the marine sitting with him described it.
“So Lawson is huddled behind this guy, and the guy is taking out the enemy one at a time like he’s playing Call of Duty or some other video game. When the spotter caught enemy fire in the shoulder and went down, Lawson grabbed his rifle and pretended to be the hero, like he’d taken out all those enemy soldiers.
“He’d regained his nerve and stood in the window of the building, gun at the ready, taking shots. All the other soldiers were doing their job, trying to get out alive so they hadn’t focused on Lawson and his spotter. Or if they had, they’d only have been scoping out their position, not who did what, especially since everyone expects our brother to be Jesus Christ himself, in camo.”
“Oh, my Lord,” Caitlin said, her hand flying to her mouth.
“It gets worse. The soldier who saved our dear bro and got caught by enemy fire was still alive. He dragged himself over to Lawson, moaning or something, and pulled on our dipshit brother’s pants legs. You know what our brother did?”
“What?” The word flitted from her lips in a whisper.
Zed felt like he was right back in San Diego, re-living the whole damn night. He looked toward the ceiling, gathering strength, and continued. “Lawson pulled a pistol and put a bullet in the spotter’s neck, still thinking no one was watching, hoping the bullet would be lost among the many.
“You know our brother is a sharpshooter, so he skillfully nicked the guy’s artery enough for him to bleed out. The soldier was trying to keep our brother safe, and what did Lawless do? He fucking shot the guy so the world wouldn’t find out he lost his composure and he’s not the big deal everyone thinks he is. When it was safe, he dragged the guy away like he wanted to save him or some bullshit. A marine never leaves a soldier behind.”
Caitlin clasped her mouth, while the other hand wrapped around her stomach.
“And the other marine, the guy who was sitting in the booth with Lawson…turns out, he was on the floor in the other room. He’d caught a bullet in the shoulder but he heard and saw everything, even the switching of positions on the rooftop. He witnessed Lawson losing it and murdering the spotter. Apparently, he waited and schemed to drop the bomb on Lawson.”
“Why would all of this be revealed in a public place? That seems kind of risky.”
“Yeah, surreal, right? That’s what I thought, too. Lawson kept trying to shush the other guy, to get him to shut up but the guy wanted to lord it over Lawson, I guess. Maybe the guy was afraid Lawson would off him, too, if he dropped the bomb somewhere private. Who knows?”
The two of them sat in stunned silence.
Zed pushed the back of his hand against his mouth, trying to quell the emotion threatening to surface. When he got control of himself, he said, in a low voice, “There’s more. Are you sure you want to hear all this?” His eyes started to grow moist and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to, or should, share any more. He swiped his eyes with his thumb and forefinger, once again wondering if he should order another beer. Maybe a shot or two of tequila would be better.
The waitress sashayed to their table and dropped off the check giving them a puzzled look.
When Zed reached for it, Caitlin batted his hand away. “I told you, I’m paying. Keep going with the story.”
“Thanks, sis.”
Caitlin reached across the table and took his hands. “I can’t believe you’ve kept all this to yourself. No wonder you had such a hard time at the party today. No wonder you had a hard time all year. I wish you’d told me sooner.” Her eyes were brimming with tears.
He blinked and looked up again, staring at the overhead lights. “Yeah,” he said, his voice cracking a little, before sinking back into the story, as immersed as if it were happening right now. “So I’m sitting there, freaked, and Nora comes back. She looks in the booth next to ours and says, ‘Zed, isn’t that your brother?’ She says it all chirpy and pie eyed because you know he has that effect on women.
“I’m shaking my head, trying to get her to shut her trap, but no, now she’s on a mission. And I can feel Lawson’s eyes on me. I can fucking feel them, like they’re high powered lasers. And Lawless gets up, and acts all smooth toward her, asking her how she’s doing and asking me how I’m doing and hey, what am I doing there, and shit like that.
“I start thinking maybe it’s going to blow over and everything’s going to be okay but all I want to do is get as far away from him as I can. I tell Nora we need to leave, but she looks wounded, saying she didn’t get to finish her fries or some bullshit, and hey, your brother’s here.” Zed’s lip curled in a sneer.
“And Lawless looks at me and says, ‘Brother, can I have a word with you?’ I’m about to wet myself at this point. I get up and follow him to the bathroom, and my legs are shaking. We walk in and he fucking locks the door and I think I’m dead now. My sniper brother’s going to put a bullet in my head.”
“Oh, my God, Zeddy,” Caitlin says, reverting to a childhood nickname.
“He slams me against the back of the door, puts his hand around my throat and says if I ever breathe a word of this to anyone he’s going to make sure I don’t live until sunrise.”
Caitlin gasps.
“And I say, more like I choke out, I won’t tell, I promise I won’t tell. Then he makes me promise to get the money he needs to pay off the marine sitting in the booth next to Nora. He says I have two hours to get it for him, and he and another buddy who’s in town with him will have some fun with Nora while I go get it. They’ll put her up in a nice hotel. Then he’ll let me live.”
“Shit, shit, shit,” Caitlin says.
“Yeah, I can barely breathe at this point; he’s choking the crap out of me. I manage to nod my head, so he releases me, unlocks the door and strides away while I’m trying to remember how to breathe again. I’m hazy on the details but when I leave the
bathroom, I see Nora, and another marine—probably the guy Lawson referenced in the bathroom—in their booth chatting and laughing—that girl is such a slut—so I pay our bill, and take off to try to find a way to access thousands of dollars.
“I found one of those sleazy twenty-four hour check cashing places that takes an arm and a leg in fees to cash a check, get the money, and head to the hotel Lawson told me about. I wiped out my accounts. Wiped them out.” He shakes his head. “I knock on the door and he invites me in, like we’re best buddies. He tells me to take a load off, asks me if I want a drink. He’s consumed a shit load by now. His eyes are all glassy and he’s slurring his words. Nora and the other marine are in the bedroom fucking presumably because I hear all these faked moans. I tell Lawson, no, thanks, I only want to take off, I’ve got to make it up to the Bay Area, might as well get a head start.”
Caitlin’s crying silent tears. She presses at her face with her napkin and holds up a warning hand when the waitress approaches.
Zed presses his hands into his temples, trying to stop the pounding that’s begun. “I don’t want anything to happen to you, sis. I shouldn’t be telling you. I shouldn’t have divulged any of this.”
“Give me your hands,” she commands. She grasps them tightly. “You have to tell me. Is there more?”
“A little,” Zed admits, his voice squeaking again. “Yeah. There’s more.” He clears his throat, wondering if he’s going to pass out he feels so light-headed. “So, brother dear insists I drink with him. I sip at the whiskey he pours me trying to figure out how to make my escape. The drunker Lawson gets, the meaner he gets.
“He starts babbling how he couldn’t get it up with my little whore, Nora. I say, she’s not my whore, I don’t know her that well, and he says, he’s going to get it up and fuck her if it’s the last thing he does and, man, I believe him. He says he has to take a piss and I think ‘now’s my chance.’ He heads for the hall, stops, opens the closet, turns around and pulls a gun on me as I’m starting to make my exit.”
Another gasp leaves Caitlin’s mouth.
“He fucking pulls a gun on me, sis. I mean, I can be cool under pressure but the guy’s snapped. He’s in his own world. I don’t think he even knew it was me in the room at that point. It’s like I was the enemy. I wonder if he has PTSD or something.” Zed raked his hand through his hair. “I don’t know how I did it but I manage to get him to put the gun away and then, Nora comes out looking all disheveled, high and happy and I notice Lawless is sporting wood at this point, like holding his gun at my head gave him a hard-on.
“He heads into the back with Nora as if nothing happened and I get the hell out of there.” Zed’s hands shook as reached up to stroke his soul patch. “I get in my truck, leave all my shit at the hotel, never to be seen again, and drive. Somehow I take a wrong turn heading out of San Diego and end up with my truck wrapped around a tree and me several yards away. I honestly don’t remember much as to how I ended up in that part of California, how I got wrapped around the tree, how I got thrown, did I crawl out, nothing. Big blank hole.
“A passerby saw me stumbling along the road and stopped, called for a tow truck. Then there’s another blur of missing information. I know I managed to rent a pickup and to find a place to sleep that night and got up the next day to get back home. I had to put it on credit cards because my bank account was now running empty. My truck was totaled.”
The silence stretched between him and his sis for a long time. They both sat staring at one another. Zed cleared his throat again and said, “So. I came home feeling like I had contributed blood money to a serious cover up. I’d saved all that money for a reason—it was earmarked for my remodel, and now the money was gone. I’d wimped out. I should have told him to shove it and deal with it himself, but you know me—I resist conflict, if I can help it. I drank a lot for a while, even considered pharmaceuticals. I met with a doctor who was only too happy to oblige me. I couldn’t sleep. I barely hung onto my job for a while.”
“Oh, Zeddy,” Caitlin said again.
“It was either that or suicide and I’m not that desperate.” A small, half smile curved on his face.
“Honey,” Caitlin soothed. “We have to do something. We have to go to the police or something.”
Zed scoffed. “Come on, who do you think they’ll believe, our slick brother who can charm the skin off a snake, or me who wasn’t even there? He could say I misheard, I’m prone to fanciful thinking or some bullshit like that.”
“Well, we have to do something.” Caitlin fished in her purse for her wallet, pulled out a credit card and placed it on the bill. She waved to the waitress to get her attention.
“Yeah, we have to keep it to ourselves.” He smiled at the waitress when she picked up the bill, cocking his head to take her in. Not my type, he decided. I’m more into redheads at the moment, one in particular.
“Zed! We have to do something! He could come after you.”
“He could come after you!” Zed said explosively. “Why do you think I didn’t want to tell you? I mean, I do feel better having shared it with someone but I also feel like I’m now responsible for you and your kids. One more burden of responsibility to carry around. This is so fucked up!”
His sister looked right and left to see if anyone heard Zed’s outburst. “Keep your voice down. We don’t want anyone to hear this.”
The waitress sauntered back with Caitlin’s card. She gave Zed another hopeful smile and let her fingers linger on the table.
Zed pasted on a smile he didn’t feel. He wanted to leave and sort out the effects of the confession. He reached for his ball cap resting on the seat beside him, hoping she’d get the message.
After she left, Caitlin laughed. “Look, Zed, she made a little heart next to her name. Bambi. It’s a wonder she didn’t slip you her phone number.”
Zed scoffed. “Let’s roll. I need to get my head together.”
They exited the café and stood on the sidewalk.
“My car’s that way,” Caitlin said pointing to the left.
“My truck’s the other way.” Zed stood, shuffling like a dumbass teenager for a minute. “Thanks for listening, sis.”
“We’ve got to figure something out. We can’t let this go.”
“We’re not doing anything. This is mine to sort. Promise me you won’t do anything, say anything, breathe a word to anyone. Not even Jeff. We don’t want him going all Terminator on Lawson. Your husband’s a nice guy and all, but Lawson is a trained sniper with military skills in combat. Promise me.”
“All right,” his sister reluctantly agreed. “I promise. You’re not going to do anything stupid, are you?”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know. You promise me you won’t do anything dumb.”
“I won’t do anything dumb,” he said with a roll of the eyes. “I’ve managed so far.”
Zed wrapped his arms around Caitlin, pulling her close, rocking her side to side. “You’re a great sister. The best sister in the world.” He leaned back to kiss her on the cheek. When he released her, he noticed a shiny red Mustang slowly rolling by. Beck, he thought hopefully. When he lifted his hand in acknowledgement, the Mustang sped away, leaving him wondering. He shook his head. Whatever. He had more serious matters to consider, like what in the hell to do about Lawson?
Chapter 10
Zed hated when practice ended. He had too much time to think. He pulled himself out of the pool and grabbed the white gym towel Jace handed him, wiping his face after removing his black swim goggles and blue cap.
An older man, with graying hair and a paunch asked him, “This lane open?”
“It’s all yours,” Zed said.
“You did good time. You’re a good swimmer,” Jace said.
“Thanks. I’ve always enjoyed swimming.”
“You’re doing well with the other training, too. Bike, walk-runs—great work.”
“Thanks.”
“In two days we’ll increase the
intensity. You’ll only get thirty to forty-five seconds of rest between fifty yard laps.”
“Okay. Fine.”
“Each week we’ll ramp it up. We’ll also add some sprints to the routine.”
“You’ve already told me this, Jace? Why the repeat?” Zed stalked toward the locker room to the sounds of splashing and echoing voices, bouncing along the walls. He dodged a kid wearing red and yellow water wings, rapidly making his way toward the kiddy pool.
“Joshua!” A woman called to the young lad. “No running!”
Jace hustled to catch up with Zed. “Because you haven’t been exactly chatty the last few days. You’ve been kind of pissy. Even Zoé said something about your behavior at work. What gives?”
“I’ve got a lot on my mind. Leave it be. And if you say some shit to me about how you’re only as sick as your secrets, I’ll plant my fist in your face.”
Jace took a step back, his forest-green eyes sparking. “Whoa. Where the hell is that coming from?”
Zed slid his eyes over to his friend and back toward the locker room doorway. “Sorry, man. That came out kind of abruptly.” He stalked to his locker, entered his code in the lock, and opened the metal door. “I shared the thing that’s been bothering me with my sister a few days ago, like you said. Only now I’m afraid I’ve put her in harm’s way. I don’t know which is worse—carrying the burden myself, or letting it loose to wreak havoc on someone else.”
Jace frowned. “What the hell did you tell her?”
“Come on, I’m not going to repeat it. It’s sick shit. It involves my family. I told you—leave it be.” He peeled off his swim trunks and strode toward the shower, clutching the white towel in his hand.
Jace followed close behind.
“What, you’re going to watch me while I shower?”
“Stop being a dick. Of course, I’m not going to watch. I was going to offer to lend an ear over a drink. Zoé and Marni have a date with her friend Tanya in the city. I’m free for a while.”