The Fix-It Friends--Three's a Crowd

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by Nicole C. Kear


  Mr. Luntzgarten sighs. He groans. He grumbles. He mutters. But he never, ever hums.

  Ezra, Jude, Dad, and I were really quiet until Mr. Luntzgarten got off on the fourth floor. Then we burst out talking.

  “Am I hearing things? Or was Mr. Luntzgarten just humming a merry tune?” asked Jude.

  “Why the heck is Mr. Luntzgarten so cheery?” I asked. “Do you think he won the lottery? Ooooooh, I hope so! Then he might give me a really amazing present for my birthday! Maybe a computer, or a diamond tiara?”

  “Nah,” said Dad. “There’s only one thing that makes a person so happy that they hum a merry tune without even noticing.”

  “You’re right,” I said. “I can’t believe it! Mr. Luntzgarten GOT A PUPPY!”

  Dad shook his head. “He’s in love, I bet you anything.”

  Chapter 10

  Dad went to check out the leak downstairs, and we ate snacks in Ezra’s kitchen. I drank three glasses of the delicious hibiscus iced tea Ezra’s mom always keeps in the fridge while I played with Pep, Ezra’s kitten. Pep acted like he thought my hair was yellow yarn and kept swatting at it, which cracked us all up.

  When Pep got bored with my hair, I announced, “Okay, guys, let’s get down to business! I need to put out a Code Turquoise. I repeat. Code Turquoise. This is not a test. Code Turquoise.”

  “Remind me,” said Ezra. “What’s a Code Turquoise?”

  “It means that a member of our group is in great danger!” I explained.

  “Is this because Cora’s been playing with that new girl? Margaret?” Jude asked. “I saw you moping at recess today.”

  “First of all, her name is Margot! With a silent T,” I said. “Second of all, yes. Cora has fallen under the spell of that evil sorceress. She spends all her time with Margot! She plays Blob Tag! She’s taking swimming lessons! She’s even eating SCHOOL LUNCH!”

  “You want to issue a state of emergency because Cora is eating school lunch?” Jude joked. “I know school lunch is bad, but it’s not that bad.”

  “This is serious!” I exclaimed. “What are we going to do? What’s the plan?”

  “Look, Ronny—” started Jude.

  I cleared my throat, which is the international signal for How many times have I told you to stop calling me by that dumb, babyish nickname?

  “Okay, fine—Veronica,” said Jude. “If you’re feeling left out, just tell Cora.”

  “Just tell her that Margot is spinning a web of dark magic to catch her? Warn her, you mean?”

  “Well, maybe don’t use the words ‘web of dark magic,’” said Ezra.

  “Just tell her that you miss her,” said Jude.

  “Yeah, keep it simple,” said Ezra.

  “Have you met my sister?” Jude asked Ezra. “Veronica can’t keep anything simple.”

  I glared at Jude and said to Ezra, “Sure, simple. Got it.”

  That afternoon, I practiced what I would say to Cora. It was very simple and very polite, and I knew it would work. So after dinner, I called her.

  “Hey, V,” Mrs. Klein said when she picked up the phone. She never calls me by my name because she says it takes too long. “Why do you think I named the boys Bo and Lou? Shortest names I could think of!” she always says.

  “What’s cookin’?” she asked.

  “Not much,” I said. “Is Cora there?”

  “Sorry, babe, Cora’s not here. Still at that girl’s house. What’s her name? Marjorie? Marlene?”

  “Margot,” I said. “But it’s almost eight o’clock!”

  “Yeah, she stayed for dinner,” said Mrs. Klein. “Get a load of this: They were having oysters. Oysters! Hold on a sec.”

  Suddenly her voice boomed out, “BO, UNTIE YOUR BROTHER THIS INSTANT!” After a few seconds, she boomed, “YOU DID WHAT?” Then after a few more seconds, she shouted, “WITH CRAZY GLUE? AGAIN?”

  Then she said to me, “I better go. Want Cora to call you when she gets back?”

  “Yes, please.”

  “You got it, babe,” said Mrs. Klein. Then she added, “Hey, V, you sound a little down.”

  That’s the thing about Mrs. Klein. Even though she packs a Loco Lunch Box and never buttons her shirt right, she pays attention to the things that count.

  “Everything okay?” she asked.

  “No!” I wanted to shout. “Everything is not okay! Your daughter has left me for a new girl who speaks French and eats oysters and puts a zillion zippers on clothes that DON’T EVEN NEED ZIPPERS! Please do something! I BEG YOU!”

  But instead I said, “Oh, I’m fine, thanks.”

  Before she hung up, I heard her yell at the boys, “WHY IS THE MILK BLUE? KIIIIDS!”

  I waited until nine thirty that night for Cora to call me back, but she never did. I wanted to wait even longer, but Mom and Dad forced me to go to sleep.

  * * *

  I woke up in the middle of the night because I had a terrible nightmare. In the dream, I opened my closet and saw my favorite red dress, which my aunt Alice made for me. Only it looked different because there was a big, humongous black zipper in the back. When I unzipped it, guess who was hiding in the dress? Margot!

  She jumped out at me. Her orange hair was very long and swirling like octopus tentacles. It reached out and grabbed me. I screamed, but then my mouth turned into a zipper, and Margot zipped it closed. She tied me up with a big, strong strand of her hair and locked me in the closet.

  When I woke up, I was so terrified that I crawled into bed with Mom and Dad. I slept in between them for the rest of the night.

  Chapter 11

  The next morning, I wanted to get to school early to talk to Cora before Margot got there, but I couldn’t find my left shoe anywhere! After about a hundred minutes, I found it in Pearl’s room in a gift bag left over from Christmas.

  “What are you doing with my shoe?” I asked her.

  “Is my bifday pwesent!” she said.

  Usually, I think Pearl is the cutest thing since the invention of puppy-shaped paper clips. But on this day, I did not think she was cute at all.

  I grabbed my shoe out of the bag, and Pearl whined, “Hey! That’s my pwesent!”

  “It’s not your present! It’s my shoe!” I snapped, “And, besides, it’s not even your birthday!”

  Pearl gasped. She learned how to do that from copying me. It’s my favorite sound effect.

  I shoved my shoe on and walked as fast as I could with Mom and Jude, but we were still late for school. Margot and Cora were already sitting next to each other in Antarctica. They were chatting away, like two little birds tweeting together on a branch. I tried to talk to Wren to show them that I didn’t care.

  “Good morning, Wren!” I said. “How are you?”

  “No comment,” he said.

  “I wonder how Minnie’s doing in Puerto Rico. I hope her abuela’s okay. Don’t you wish you were in Puerto Rico right now instead of boring old school? Do you think Minnie will ever come back? Do you think she forgot about us?”

  “No,” he said.

  “No to which question?” I asked him.

  “No comment,” he said.

  * * *

  Margot stayed right next to Cora for the whole morning. She only left our table for a minute to go to the bathroom.

  As soon as she got up, Cora said to me, “Veronica, you have to come to Margot’s mom’s studio! It’s fantastique! She taught me how to use a sewing machine!”

  “Cool,” I said, trying to find a way to start the speech I had practiced. But she just kept talking.

  “And then we went back to her apartment and—listen to this: She has her own room—”

  “That’s nice, but—” I tried again.

  “—and her own bathroom! Can you believe it? I wish I had my own room! It was so nice to have peace and quiet for a change; no little brothers or sisters running around bothering us.”

  I felt like Cora wasn’t just talking about her house but my house, too. After all, I had a little sister tha
t always bothered us. I always thought Cora loved Pearl, but maybe she was tired of her shenanigans.

  “And you will never believe what her mom made for dinner,” Cora went on.

  “Oysters,” I said.

  “Yes! Oysters, just for a regular Monday dinner! Can you believe it? The fanciest thing my mom makes is PB&J with extra-crunchy peanut butter.”

  Then Margot came back from the bathroom. I hadn’t even had one minute to give Cora my speech! So I decided to talk to her at lunch while Margot waited in line. But that didn’t work, either, because Cora said she was getting school lunch again, too, and she went off to wait in line with Margot.

  Dad had made one of my favorite sandwiches—a cream-cheese-and-cucumber sandwich with no crust, exactly like what you get when you have royal tea in England—but I only took a few nibbles. I just didn’t have my usual appetite.

  Margot and Cora were talking all about Margot’s mom’s new line of kids’ clothing. They were chatting so much that it was like they didn’t even notice me sitting there. I felt invisible.

  “My favorite dress is the black, shiny dress with zippers that go up both sides,” Margot said. “Remember that one, Coco?”

  I waited for Cora to correct her. But, instead, she smiled and said, “Oh yes, Gogo, that one was my favorite, too.”

  Coco? I thought. Gogo?

  My heart was racing, and my face felt very hot. They had nicknames for each other? Nicknames! This was serious. This had gone too far.

  I suddenly felt very desperate for Cora to pay attention to me.

  “Hey, Cora!” I exclaimed. “We have a Fix-It Friends emergency! It’s…” I had to think of a good problem, fast. “Maya! It’s Maya. She looks worried again. I mean, it’s almost spring, which means bugs are buzzing around again, and you know how scared she is of bugs.” I was talking really fast, almost as fast as Ezra talks. “I think the Fix-It Friends should have a meeting to help Maya. Immediately.”

  Cora looked over at the lunch table next to us, where Maya was laughing with the girl next to her.

  “She seems fine,” said Cora.

  “Well, sure, right now,” I said. “But worry can strike at any moment.”

  “What are the Fix-It Friends?” asked Margot.

  Finally! Margot was paying attention to me for a change.

  “It’s a problem-solving group,” I replied. “I started it. I don’t mean to brag, but we’re pretty famous.”

  “So what do you guys do? Solve math problems?” asked Margot.

  I laughed really loudly to show how ridiculous that was.

  “Not math problems! Real problems. Like—Maya. She was so worried about bugs that she couldn’t play at recess. It was absolutely awful … till we helped her!”

  Margot chewed a mouthful of rice and beans.

  “Sounds cool,” she said. “Can I help?”

  “No!” It slipped out before I could stop myself.

  “Veronica!” Cora scolded.

  I tried to fix things.

  “Well, I only mean … because, you’re so busy, Margot, with swimming and getting used to a new place and everything. The Fix-It Friends is really a big-time commitment.”

  “I’m not that busy,” Margot said. “And it sounds fun.”

  “Oh, it’s not that fun,” I said very quickly. “In fact, it’s really pretty boring most of the time. A real snooze-fest. My brother is in it, and he’s awful! He is so bossy and a know-it-all. Trust me, you’d hate it.”

  “Oh, he’s not so bad. And our meetings are a lot of fun,” said Cora. Then she started telling Margot all about Maya and Noah and Liv and all the other people we had helped. I took a bite of my sandwich, but I felt like my mouth couldn’t chew. It felt like my whole body was made of cement—so heavy and sad.

  I’d been trying to find a time to talk to Cora all day, but now I felt like it would be a big waste of time. She’d never listen to me. All she cared about was Margot.

  “Lots of people help us all the time,” said Cora cheerily. “We love help!”

  I couldn’t stand the idea of Margot joining the Fix-It Friends. She’d probably just take over and make everyone like her better than me. Even Jude would probably start wearing zippers and speaking French and swimming! Before long, he’d probably want her as his sister instead of me!

  No way, I thought. I’d rather cancel the whole group than let that happen.

  “Actually, Cora, I think you’re right about Maya,” I said loudly. “She doesn’t look worried at all. I was wrong. She doesn’t need the Fix-It Friends.”

  But you do, Cora Klein, I thought. You do.

  Chapter 12

  That day, Nana came with Pearl to pick up Jude, Ezra, and me from school.

  “We need an emergency Fix-It meeting,” I told them. And then, before they could ask, I said, “No Cora. I’ll explain everything at home.”

  “Wook, Wonny!” shouted Pearl from her stroller. “Is my bifday!”

  I looked down and saw that Pearl and Ricardo were both wearing party hats.

  “Pearl, you’re almost three years old, which is old enough to face the facts,” I said firmly. “Your birthday isn’t until next month, in April.”

  Pearl crumpled up in her stroller and started crying.

  “I wanna bifday!” she cried. “I wanna ’appy bifday!”

  Nana gave me a look that said, Come on, she’s just a poor, defenseless baby! and I gave her a look that said, But she’s stealing my birthday!

  Pearl just kept crying and drooling all over Ricardo.

  So I said very impatiently, “Okay, fine. Happy birthday, Pearl. Happy birthday to you.”

  She stopped crying and beamed a big smile at me.

  “Tank you!” she said oh-so-happily.

  When we got home, I went into the kitchen to make some snacks. Pearl walked in with a roll of toilet paper that she pretended was a birthday cake. She sat down in the corner with Ricardo and had a pretend party.

  “Yuuuuuum,” she said, smacking her lips as she pretended to take a big bite out of the cake. “Faiwy-dust spwinkles!”

  No wonder Cora doesn’t want to come over here anymore, I thought.

  I carried my special nacho snacks into the bedroom I share with Jude. He and Ezra were sitting on the floor, reading comic books.

  Jude peered at the plate through his glasses. “What kind of nachos are these?”

  “I’m glad you asked,” I said. “This is artichoke hearts mashed up into little bits with a fork. You can scoop it up with the nachos. I call it the Broken Hearts Special.”

  Jude groaned. “Let me guess. This snack has a whole long story to go with it.”

  “Correct!” I said. I put the plate on the floor and sat cross-legged next to it. As we munched, I gave them an update about Cora’s problem.

  “It won’t work to talk to her! Something more drastic must be done!”

  I tapped the floor with my fingertips. Tapping helps me think. Jude says it’s very annoying, but I think that his way of thinking, which is to be totally silent, is very annoying. In fact, there is nothing that bothers me more than the sound of no sounds.

  “Think!” I told them. “We have to help Cora!”

  Jude looked at Ezra. Ezra looked at Jude. I hate it when they do this. It means they are about to say something that I do not want to hear.

  “Cora’s not the one with the problem,” said Jude. “You are.”

  I snorted.

  “That’s a laugh!” I said. “Cora’s changing faster than a mealworm turning into a beetle, and I’m the one with a problem! Me? Ha! Ha HA! HA HA HA!”

  “Tell her about Arnie-geddon,” Jude said to Ezra.

  “Yes,” agreed Ezra. “It’s time.”

  “What are you talking about?” I asked.

  “You must have patience. All will be revealed,” said Jude, popping a nacho into his mouth.

  “Okay, let me break it down for you,” said Ezra, cracking his knuckles. I sat up and paid attention, becaus
e when Ezra cracks his knuckles, it means he’s going to tell a story, and when Ezra tells a story, you better listen up, or you won’t understand a thing. “So, basically, Jude and I had been best friends since the beginning of first grade, and everything was cool until we started second grade and Jude met Arnie.”

  “Arnie was really funny,” added Jude. “He used to do this hilarious routine where he made one of his hands talk to the other hand in funny accents. The best one was his leprechaun voice.”

  “His leprechaun voice was all wrong,” grumbled Ezra. “It didn’t sound Irish! It sounded like it was from Transylvania.”

  “Agree to disagree,” said Jude, laughing.

  “So anyway … Jude suddenly wanted to do everything with Arnie. Lunch with Arnie and recess with Arnie and—oh!” Ezra turned to Jude. “Remember how you were too scared to sleep over at my house, but you went over to Arnie’s house and had your first sleepover there?”

  I gasped. “Jude, you traitor!”

  Ezra continued. “I was so furious at Arnie that once I shoved him really hard at recess and he scraped his elbow, and I got sent to the principal’s office, which was really awkward—”

  “Because she’s your mom!” I laughed.

  “Yeah, because of that,” Ezra said. “So I fought with Jude, and I fought with Arnie, and it was all a big mess. It was Arnie-geddon … until Miss Tibbs saved the day by getting me to play tag at recess with a bunch of other kids. At first I really didn’t want to, but it was actually really fun. And in a few days I stopped caring so much about Jude playing with Arnie.”

  “Yeah, and by that time I was starting to get annoyed by Arnie anyway. He couldn’t keep a secret. He told the whole second grade that I was terrified of butterflies. Which I specifically told him never to tell anyone!”

  “So that’s why everyone used to tease you about caterpillars,” I said.

  Jude nodded and then said, “So now do you understand? What is the moral of our tale?”

 

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