by Tracy Lauren
“What’s so funny?” she asks.
“I was merely thinking of how enamored those primitives were with you,” I reply.
“I don’t see what’s funny about that,” she says haughtily.
“Imagine their civilization a thousand years from now. I think they will still be telling tales of the Goddess Kickin, the fabled docile female. There will be statues in your honor.”
“You noticed they were calling me Kickin, huh?”
“I also noticed you kept calling Khkuk Cahcook,” I tease.
“Of course it’s easy for you to say,” she laments. “How much of the conversation did you catch anyway?”
“Not too much more than that, I was paying my attention to the talk of the males. There were many who were not willing to let you leave.”
“You could understand them?”
“Not fully, not as much as it seemed you could. But enough.”
“Wait…you knew they were going to try to keep me and we didn’t leave sooner?”
“I did not wish to ruin your good time,” I tell her, and she scoffs at me, but I see true amusement lighting her eyes. “Besides, if you wished to escape you could have simply ascended into the vines like you did—”
“Don’t even go there,” she cuts me off.
Silence stretches between us, and I know she can sense me watching her. I can smell her shyness. “You know I am curious.”
She turns away from me and pretends to busy herself at the controls. She does not reply.
“You have secrets, Vivian. I already know this.”
“If I do they are mine to keep. But, just to be clear, I’m not saying that I do.”
“What are you so afraid of?” I press.
“Uhhh…literally everything.”
“No. I mean here. Right here. It is just you and me. What do you think will happen if you speak your truths to me?”
She remains silent.
“I am not asking for your secrets, Vivian, I am only asking what will happen if you share them.”
She lets out a long and pained sigh. “I don’t want to be the librarian anymore, okay. I can’t be that person here. I want to be Vivian.”
“Of course you are, Vivian, who else would you be?”
Her jaw tightens.
“Tell me then, what would happen if you were the librarian?”
“Ugh! This! All of this! I mean, nothing’s changed. I haven’t changed. I’m still just a scared, timid, old prude!” she says grievously.
“I am not following…” I admit.
“Look, I don’t want to be me anymore! There’s nothing else to it. I didn’t want to be me back on Earth, and I sure as shit don’t want to be me out here.” Her voice starts to quake and she rises from her seat, ready to run but with nowhere to go.
I meet her in an instant, but her arms hold me at bay. She hangs her head and I do not know what to say… I do not even know what is wrong.
“If I tell you, Dax, it’s like admitting I’m still that person, that there’s nothing else in the universe I can ever be. It would be putting the nail in my own coffin. It would be done. And if I don’t tell you, then…then maybe it’s open ended, maybe anything can happen. Maybe I can be anybody.”
“But how can you be anybody? You are Vivian! That is the only person you can be! Is this some type of human riddle?”
She shakes her head and smiles down at my hands, gripping her wrists that still hold me at bay. “Look at you. You’re a mess, Dax.”
“The same could be said for you, little Goddess.”
“Ugh, I’m sure it could.” She frowns. Pulling her hands from me, she picks at her mane. The absence of her touch leaves me cold, and I reach to pull stray hair back from her face, allowing my fingertips to gently skim the softness of her mane.
“There is a small bathing unit in the bathroom,” I tell her. “Hmm, but there might be a problem with it.”
“A problem?”
“I do not think we will both fit,” I say with a frown.
“Oh my God, you’re so dumb.” She rolls her eyes at me. “You look worse for wear, you can go first. Show me how it works after.”
“If you insist.”
“I do.”
I turn to head towards the bathing unit, but stop short. “It was lovely, though, was it not?”
“What was?”
“Their world, their lives.”
“Their females were nuts!” she exclaims.
“And yet still they carried on somehow. Such is the plight of males throughout the universe. We are a resilient sex.”
“Very funny. Go take your shower,” she says, rolling her eyes at me again. I glance back at her one last time before I shut the door. She has pulled the star stones from her pocket, rolling them in her fingers. If I am not mistaken, I see her smile.
Chapter 17
Dax
I wait expectantly as Vivian showers. Knowing she is wet and naked behind the flimsy door that hides the pod’s facilities makes me anxious. My claws click the metal floor as I listen to the flow of water. I think about knocking but push the idea away. What would I even say? Instead I get up to pace the room.
I cannot play games with this female. I know her core is a fragile one, and to mate with her would be to mate for life. There would be no other way with Vivian. I resolve to not travel that path unless I am sure she wants what I do. Then, it is like a wave that washes over me as I realize what I want. Perhaps it was there all along. Perhaps that is why I have been drawn to her since the beginning. I want Vivian as my mate.
I hear the water shut off and it causes me to jolt. Hesitantly, I step closer to the door, drawn to the idea of the female behind it. I can hear her murmuring to herself. I draw nearer and place my ear to the door, trying to make out what it is she says. The first clear thing that I hear is a groan. I still and my cock instantly goes hard.
“I look fine…” she insists to herself. “No blow dryer…no mascara…not even a freaking Chapstick…it’s fine…no big deal. This is just what I look like. No one is looking at me anyway. I mean, I was good enough for the hamster planet, right? No…this is fine…I look fine…”
Is she self-conscious? I frown at the thought. I hear her gathering her things and practically leap to my seat just as the door swings open. I attempt to look casual as I adjust my waist cloth. I have prepared to tell her she looks lovely to help quell her insecurities, but when I look up at her I am stopped short.
“You look…” The words catch in my throat.
She makes another audible groan and her shoulders slump. “Look, it’s the best I can do with what I’ve got. Story of my life,” she adds quietly.
“I would love to hear it,” I say, clearing my throat. I try in vain to focus on her words and not her body, but she wears only an oversized white shirt that falls to the middle of her thighs and I struggle to keep my focus. She stares down at her feet and I notice she is barefoot. I can hear the soft padding of her feet against metal as she crosses the room. There is a pounding within me, and again I have to adjust my waist cloth. My eyes slowly travel from those strange yet perfect toes on her feet, up her smooth legs, only to hover at the hem of her shirt… If she were only to bend over to pick something up… I shake myself from these thoughts and quickly shoot my gaze to her face so she does not catch me ogling her.
Normally I would enjoy watching her squirm under my gaze, but the feelings she spurs are foreign to me. Still, I cannot seem to pull my eyes away. Her skin is bright and renewed after bathing, and her mane is clean and combed through. She looks so fresh, like a clean slate. It makes me think that any number of things are possible.
“What did you say?” she asks.
“I said I would love to hear it.”
“Love to hear what?”
“The story of your life.”
“That’s just an expression, Dax. Plus, I already told you, my secrets are mine to keep.”
“You also said you did not have any secrets,
” I remind her.
“People say lots of things…” she mumbles, more to herself than to me.
“Did you enjoy your shower?”
“Yeah, it was fine. Feels good to be clean, but I miss my stuff, you know?”
“Is there anything you need? We can stop at a trading outpost—”
“No, it’s no big deal. It’s just stuff, right? Anyway, I don’t think the trading outpost would have Noxzema and a Conair. I’ll just have to learn to live without it,” she says, settling into a seat and reclining, readying herself for sleep.
“I have our next adventure planned,” I tell her enthusiastically, suddenly forming a plan.
“Uh oh,” she responds, sitting up. “What are you going to make me do now?”
“What do you want me to make you do?” I inquire with a cocked brow. She raises an unamused brow at me in return.
“Fine. I will set coordinates to the space station, Lock VI. I have a ship there. A real one, not a pod.”
“What’s the difference?” She shrugs. “This one works fine.”
“My ship has a real shower and a tub. And beds. Big, soft, luxurious…”
“Does it have comparable weapons systems?” she asks plainly.
“You know, I think you and I might be cut from the same cloth,” I tell her with a smile.
“Please don’t insult me,” she teases, actually allowing herself to smile. “Answer the question.”
“Vivian! It is my personal ship, it has better weapons than this pod. Far better and it is faster too.”
“Faster, better weapons, and bedrooms? I’m sold. Wait…is there a catch?” she asks suspiciously.
“Would I not tell you if there were?”
“No, you probably would not,” she huffs, shaking her wet mane out. “Go ahead and set course.”
“You will not be disappointed,” I tell her, absently typing at the control panel. My eyes are drawn to her. Her bare legs tucked beneath her, the shadow of her shirt blocking my view of anything beyond her thighs, the wet places her mane leaves at the collar of her shirt, hinting at transparency. My Vivian is too busy battling with her mane to notice me watching her, and eventually her battle becomes too much for me to ignore any longer.
“Hold still, you silly thing,” I insist.
“What? What are you—”
I wrap my arms around her and lift her up, carrying her to my seat.
“Dax…?” She squirms nervously as I set her atop my lap. I grit my teeth to keep from focusing on the feeling of her bare thighs against mine. My core pounds again, harder this time, and I rub at my chest in confusion.
“Here,” I tell her, turning her chin away from me and tilting her head to the side. It leaves her neck exposed to me, and I am reminded of when she bit me.
“Um, Dax? What’s going on?”
“I am going to help you tame all this wildness,” I explain.
“Hah! I think that is the only time those words will ever be spoken to me… I can only assume you are talking about my hair then,” she says, and her shoulders relax at the realization.
“Do you have some other wildness you would like me to tame?” I ask playfully as I part her mane delicately with my claw.
“I wish…” she says longingly, and I freeze.
“You do?” I question, my cock springing to life again.
“Wish I had some wildness? Yeah…kind of.”
Oh…that is what she meant. “Hm…well, I have wildness to spare, little Goddess. If you should ever want lessons. As a matter of fact, I am free right now.”
“No you aren’t. You’re doing my hair,” she points out.
“I am already finished with the first row. There will be plenty of time for wildness after,” I say, starting in on the next braid, but she ignores me in favor of the yawn escaping her lips.
“This is nice,” she says a moment later. “It reminds me of when my grandma used to do my hair when I was a kid.”
“Never have I received a greater insult,” I tell her as I tug a strand of her locks.
“No! You know what I mean, it’s just comforting. I like it.”
“It is what I am here for, Vivian. To bring you comfort.” I mean no joke or deception to my words, but Vivian becomes visibly uncomfortable by them, shifting on my lap.
“There, it is done.”
“Can I go look?” she asks, already making her way to the facilities. I follow close behind, interested in her reaction to my work.
Once inside the doorway, I see her standing before the mirror, looking at her reflection with an O on her lips. Reverently she touches her braids. I squeeze into the small space behind her, and her back presses against my stomach. I have to take a deep breath to settle the pounding within my chest.
“Wow.”
“What do you think?” I ask, assessing my work on the series of plaits woven tightly to her head.
“It’s uh…wow.”
“You already said that.”
“It’s different.”
“You do not like it? I can change the style,” I offer.
“No! Don’t.” She stares at her reflection almost reverently. “I hardly recognize myself. I mean, I would never wear my hair like this—”
“It sounds as if you do not like it…” I say, cocking my head to the side in a mixture of confusion and amusement.
“I didn’t say that right. I mean, that’s what I like about it… It’s just so utterly…different,” she emphasizes, smiling at her reflection in the mirror.
“I am glad you like it.”
“I love it,” she says dreamily, locking onto my eyes in the mirror.
Chapter 18
Vivian
When I wake up, Dax is watching me again. I try to ignore the stupid little flutter of butterflies in my tummy and tell myself there just isn’t much to look at in our tiny pod. It’s like the Winnebago of spaceships. He must be bored to death and I’m the only novelty for miles around. Light years even. That’s the only reason he watches me… I’m sure of it.
A few days have passed since our harrowing escape from the hamster planet. I let out a long yawn and stretch my limbs before I grab my rucksack and head to the bathroom.
“You are going to get ready for the day?” Dax asks.
“Yeah, did you need to use the bathroom first?”
He ignores me as he gets to his feet, making his way over to me. My heart pounds a little harder at his nearness. He reaches for my rucksack and pulls it from my hands. Relinquishing my bag, I avoid his eyes, embarrassed at the stupid crush I’m developing. I need to stop before it gets me hurt. It’s nothing more than a fantasy. A stupid fantasy for a stupid girl.
“Hey! Wait a sec, what are you doing?” I ask when I realize he’s rummaging through my bag.
“This,” he says, shoving a garment at me. “And this one…”
“I can pick out my own clothes, thank you very much,” I assure him.
His brows rise skeptically.
“Hey! What’s that look for?” I ask defensively. “I can pick my own clothes just fine!”
“Not today,” he tells me. “We reach Lock VI today.”
“Yeah, so?”
“There will be many species on the station. You will be the only human. Would you like to stand out or blend in?” he questions.
“Do all your explanations have to take so long?” I ask, crossing my arms over my chest.
“How else am I to enjoy the sound of my own voice?” he replies with his dark eyes twinkling. My first instinct is to scowl, only I can’t help but laugh as I slip into the bathroom. It isn’t until after I freshen up that I really look at what he has picked out for me to wear. I hold the items up, only to realize I’m gripping a long, flowy green skirt and a lace-up bodice.
“Dax! What the hell is this?” I call out to him. “I can’t put this on!”
“Open the door and I will help you,” he says. His voice sounds so close I nearly jump out of my skin. He must be standing right
outside the door. I open it and stick my head out. I was right, he’s practically pressed up against the darn thing.