Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Horse Lover's Companion

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Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Horse Lover's Companion Page 5

by Bathroom Readers' Institute


  Using a golden bridle that Athena, the goddess of war, had given him, Greek hero Bellerophon captured and tamed Pegasus. Together, hero and horse set about conquering the world. At this point, though, Bellerophon got too big for his britches—he tried to scale Mt. Olympus and live among the gods. Zeus was in no mood for uninvited guests, though, so he sent an insect to sting Pegasus. This caused the horse to rear and throw Bellerophon, who fell back to Earth to live out his days disabled and blind.

  With Bellerophon out of the picture, Pegasus was welcomed into the gods’ abode, where Eos, the goddess of dawn, claimed him. Pegasus was made into a constellation that bears his name, which appears in the spring sky. Modern Myth: In modern culture, Pegasus is known as the symbol of Mobil gas and oil (Exxon Mobil Corp.) and the mascot of TriStar Pictures. And in England during World War II, the country’s parachute forces used Bellerophon astride Pegasus as their insignia to symbolize warriors swooping into battle from above.

  Sneaky, Sneaky

  In computer lingo, a Trojan Horse is a program that messes up your hard drive. Unlike a computer virus that replicates, the Trojan horse hides in plain sight, waiting for you to think it’s a useful program and execute it.

  Off to the Races: The Godolphin Arabian and Eclipse

  Horse races have thrilled spectators since 5000 BC, when the first nomads staged competitions across the steppes of central Asia. Here are two of the greatest horses to influence the sport and find their way into the history books.

  The Godolphin Arabian: An Original Sire

  Thoroughbred racing as we know it developed in the 17th and 18th centuries after Europeans discovered the speed and stamina of Bedouin horses during the Crusades. European nobility imported Arabian stallions to breed to their mares, and all of today’s Thoroughbreds can trace their lineage back to three primary stallions from the Middle East: the Darley Arabian, Godolphin Arabian, and Byerley Turk. Perhaps the most famous of those is the Godolphin Arabian.

  In 1724, a bay foal named Shami was born in Yemen. He was first presented to the Bey of Tunis (the Tunisian head of state) and then given to King Louis XV of France as a gift. But the French court considered the horse unsuitable for breeding—at just 14.3 hands, he was small, and the trip from Tunis was hard on him. He looked thin and had a dull coat, not what the French considered to be good stock. So in 1729, King Louis sold him to the English horse breeder Edward Cooke.

  Cooke also considered Shami inferior, but bred him anyway . . . with the mare Lady Roxanne, who produced a foal named Lath. That horse became England’s greatest racer of the day, winning the Queen’s Plate race at Newmarket nine times. Suddenly, Shami was in demand for stud. The Earl of Godolphin bought him in 1733 and renamed him the Godolphin Arabian. Shami’s foals not only dominated racing in the 18th century, they also became the sires and dams of champions. Even 20th-century track greats like Man o’ War and Seabiscuit had pedigrees that led back to the small Arabian horse from Tunis.

  Eclipse: The Horse from Nowhere

  On April 1, 1764, two major events occurred: one was a solar eclipse, and the other was the birth of a colt named Eclipse (in honor of the astronomical event). Eclipse belonged to the English Duke of Cumberland, but when the duke died a year later, the horse was sold to William Wildman, a sheep dealer. Wildman may have worried that he got a bad deal—Eclipse was not only high-strung and hard to handle, the horse also galloped with his nose almost touching the ground.

  Despite his problems, Eclipse entered his first race in 1769. It was a race of four separate heats, each a mile long. By the beginning of the second heat, spectator Captain Dennis O’Kelly was so impressed with Eclipse’s stamina that he made one of the world’s most daring (and now famous) bets. In those days, any horse lagging more than 240 yards behind the front-runner was said to be “nowhere.” O’Kelly bet that the race would end with “Eclipse first, and the rest, nowhere.” Eclipse won; his competitors were, in fact, nowhere, and the exuberant O’Kelly bought a half interest in the horse.

  Eclipse went on to win every race he entered. He was so fast that after two years no one would bet on any other horse when Eclipse was in the lineup. So he was retired to stud, and today at least 80 percent of racing’s Thoroughbreds (including Canada’s Northern Dancer) are descendants of the great racehorse who left his competition “nowhere.”

  For Man o’ War and Secretariat, turn to page 39.

  To read about Citation and Ruffian, turn to page 145.

  Perfume and Ponies

  In 1947, a horse named Jet Pilot won the Kentucky Derby. Most people don’t remember him, but they do know his owner: cosmetics queen Elizabeth Arden.

  Queen of the Stable

  Elizabeth Arden made her fortune in cosmetics, but by 1947, her name, her Kentucky stable (Maine Chance Farm), and the cherry, blue, and white racing silks her jockeys wore were well known in racing circles. In 1945, the horses of Maine Chance won more money than any other Thoroughbred stable in America, and in 1946, Elizabeth Arden the racehorse owner made the cover of Time magazine.

  Arden’s enthusiastic interest in horses was no accident. Born in 1878 to a farm family near Toronto, Canada, the young girl took responsibility for tending the family horses. It was a long time before she had a horse of her own, though. She grew up to make a fortune in the cosmetics industry and, in 1931, finally invested some of her money in her first Thoroughbred—How High. Soon after, her flamboyant styel set tongues wagging throughout racing circles.

  Mrs. Mud Pack

  The décor of Arden’s stables mimicked that of her famous Red Door salons. Hanging plants adorned the horse stalls. Soothing music was piped into the barns. Arden was quoted as saying, “Treat a horse like a woman and a woman like a horse, and they’ll both win for you.”

  She wasn’t joking. According to biographer Lindy Woodhead, Arden’s stable boys referred to her as “Mrs. Mud Pack.” Her horses were regularly massaged with her Eight Hour Cream. Ardena Skin Tonic Lotion was used to wash them. She insisted that the stalls and jockey silks be scented with her Blue Grass perfume. And no matter where the horses were stabled—at home or at racetracks around the country—their diet included clover shipped from Maine.

  Although she pampered her horses, Arden was tough on her stable staff and trainers. They either did things her way, or they were replaced. Over a 30-year period she hired and fired more than 60 trainers.

  Suspicious Flame

  In 1946, Arden’s horses were at the pinnacle of Thoroughbred racing. Then in May, her barn at Illinois’ Arlington Park racetrack caught fire. It was suspicious—the fire was isolated to her barn, two grooms who were supposed to be on duty through the night were mysteriously absent, and unlike every other barn at the track, Arden’s was pitch dark. Arden’s horses had begun to dominate racing. (She had three entered in that year’s Kentucky Derby.) And rumors abounded that some of the unsavory characters involved in the industry—notably gamblers and organized crime figures—wanted to “put her in her place.”

  The fire’s cause was never determined, and Arden lost 23 of the 28 horses she had quartered at Arlington. But she persevered, and Jet Pilot, who wasn’t there for the fire, went on to win the Derby the next year.

  It’s Who You Know

  One key to Arden’s success in horseracing was her connection to the sport’s high echelon. Her first winning horse, named Grand Union, was a grandson of the legendary Man o’ War. It was Man o’ War’s owner, Sam Riddle, who persuaded Arden to get into the horseracing business. One of Man o’ War’s trainers, Clarence Buxton, even trained Arden’s horses for two years.

  She also had a connection to the Depression-era Thoroughbred Seabiscuit. Arden hired his trainer, Tom Smith, who ultimately became her longest-tenured trainer—lasting nearly five years before he retired. It was Smith who trained Jet Pilot for the Derby in 1947, a nail-biting race that required the very first photo finish in Kentucky Derby history.

  Rein ’Em In

  All about the sport that t
ook Western riding by storm and may soon be going to the Olympics.

  You’ve seen reining images on magazine covers for years: A sleek horse slams to a sliding stop, raising a cloud of dust. The rider, perfectly balanced, directs his mount seemingly with just a flick of the wrist. But what exactly is reining?

  The practice was born in the Old West, when horse and rider needed to be in sync to herd and cut cattle. Since the 1980s, reining has become increasingly popular as a sport, leading to rumors that it might soon become an Olympic event. It’s the Western equivalent of dressage, but faster. Riders in reining competitions guide their horses through a series of maneuvers (especially circles, spins, and stops) at a lope and gallop.

  Strut Your Stuff

  Reining is designed to show off a horse’s athleticism and responsiveness. Competitors are judged on their speed, accuracy, and finesse at performing specific skills. These maneuvers are usually part of the competition:

  •Walking from the gate to the center of the arena. Poise and confidence are what the judges are looking for here.

  •Running circles. The circles should be perfectly round at various speeds—large circles at a gallop and small circles at a lope. Judging is based on the circle’s form and on how quickly the horse responds to the rider’s commands to speed up or slow down.

  •Executing a flying lead change (changing the lead at a lope).

  •Galloping around the arena, also known as the rundown; this must be performed before a sliding stop.

  •Sliding stops—coming to a complete stop by skidding on the hind feet. This has become the iconic image of reining and the most crowd-pleasing trick performed in competition.

  •Executing a rollback—making a 180-degree turn immediately after a sliding stop.

  •Backing up in a straight line.

  •Spinning while keeping one hind leg stationary.

  •Pausing between movements and remaining poised and calm.

  Got a Quarter?

  Any breed of horse can participate in a reining competition, but the most popular is the American quarter horse. In fact, it was the American Quarter Horse Association that, in 1949, first recognized reining as a sport. Today, the National Reining Horse Association (NRHA) oversees the competitions. In 2000, the NRHA started working with the Federation Equestre Internationale (FEI), the governing board for equestrian events in the Olympics, to get reining on the schedule for the 2012 London Games.

  Heavy Medals

  The FEI’s recognition also helped to increase reining’s popularity around the world. It’s best known as an American sport, but several countries (including Italy, Israel, Brazil, Canada, and France) hold their own national reining competitions.

  The three most prestigious reining competitions are the FEI World Reining Masters, an annual event that began in 2004; the FEI European Championships, held every two years; and the World Equestrian Games (WEG), a major international equestrian competition and the contest that now crowns a World Reining Champion every four years. It was only in 2002 that the WEG even started to include reining, but supporters call it a major step on the road to inclusion in the Olympics. (Of course, some equestrians maintain that the WEG is better than the Olympics anyway.)

  Believe It or Not

  You may be surprised at some of the myths and facts about our four-hoofed friends.

  Seabiscuit was the biggest newsmaker in America in 1938.

  Most likely, myth. Laura Hillenbrand made this claim in her book Seabiscuit: An American Legend, which was later made into a movie. She wrote that in 1938, as the Great Depression raged and World War II was brewing, more inches of newspaper column space were devoted to Seabiscuit than to President Franklin Roosevelt, Adolf Hitler, or Benito Mussolini. “It’s astonishing,” Hillenbrand said in a PBS interview. “I don’t think any athlete in history has ever come close to achieving that. And this is a horse.”

  However, some people—like Ralph E. Shaffer, professor emeritus in history at California State Polytechnic University in Pomona—have challenged her assertion. Shaffer could not trace Hillenbrand’s claim to its original source. Furthermore, neither a listing in the San Francisco News of more than 100 top headlines of 1938 nor Gallup’s public opinion poll of the year’s top 10 stories made any reference to Seabiscuit. The New York Times Index and The Britannica Yearbook for 1938 contain few mentions of the racehorse, and these certainly don’t compare in number to the entries about President Roosevelt. But even if Seabiscuit wasn’t the top-reported news that year, his story inspired people at a time when they needed it. And he certainly could have been the most discussed topic of casual conversation.

  Jell-O is made of horse hooves and bones.

  Myth. This is based on something that’s true, though: gelatin is derived from the bones and hides of cattle and pigs. Because the ingredients are boiled, filtered, and processed heavily, the final product is not classified as a meat or animal product. But horses are not used in the process.

  You can tell a horse’s age by its teeth.

  Fact. In this case, looking a horse in the mouth has advantages. How many teeth a horse has, the markings and signs of wear on them, and their shape and length all point to a horse’s age. A horse is still a foal (under a year old) if it has baby teeth, which are smaller and whiter with a rounded gum line. These start falling out when a foal hits six months. If a horse has a full set of permanent teeth, it’s at least four years old. In some horses, a groove appears in their upper corner tooth. Depending on how far down the groove runs, this signifies that a horse is 10, 15, or 20 years old.

  For more “believe it or not,” turn to page 134.

  Training Day

  Want to teach an old horse new tricks? Here’s some advice.

  “Practice sharpens, but overschooling blunts the edge. If your horse isn’t doing right, the first place to look is yourself.”

  —Joe Heim, horse trainer and breeder

  “The one best precept—the golden rule in dealing with a horse—is never to approach him angrily. Anger is so devoid of forethought that it will often drive a man to do things which in a calmer mood he will regret.”

  —Xenophon, ancient Greek writer

  “When your horse has reached his potential, leave it. It is such a nice feeling when you and your horse are still friends.”

  —Reiner Klimke, Olympic dressage gold medalist

  “If training has not made a horse more beautiful, nobler in carriage, more attentive in his behavior, revealing pleasure in his own accomplishment . . . then he has not truly been schooled in dressage.”

  —Colonel Handler, head of Vienna’s Spanish Riding School

  The Little Iron Horses

  Thanks to a tenacious poultry farmer–turned politician, Canada now has an official national horse—a breed aptly named the Canadian.

  A Rugged Horse in a Rugged Land

  The saga of the Canadian horse began in 1665 when two stallions and 20 mares arrived in New France (now Quebec and the Maritime provinces), a gift from the royal stables of Louis XIV. The horses quickly adjusted to Canada’s extreme climate, proving themselves to be enduring workhorses and capable carriage and riding horses. They drew plows on the prairies and hauled logs from the nation’s forests. By the mid-19th century, the original 22 had multiplied to 150,000. Renowned for their strength and endurance, they became known as the “Little Iron Horses.”

  About this time, though, life got tough for the Canadian breed. They were pressed into service in the American Civil War, the War of 1812, and the Indian Wars. Canada’s soldiers used them as riding and packhorses during the Boer War. In peacetime, they worked as pack animals during the Klondike gold rush and, on one occasion, were used on an Arctic expedition. By the end of the 19th century, their numbers had dwindled, and by 1970, only 400 were registered in Canada.

  Comeback Kids

  So began an effort to save them. In 1976, breeders in Quebec and Ontario teamed with the University of Guelph’s Equine Research Centre to
reestablish the stock. Thanks to this work, combined with the horses’ resilience, registered Canadians now number about 3,000.

  Thank Calder

  Getting the breed officially designated “Canada’s national horse” took some time. A bill to that effect had been introduced in the Canadian House of Commons in 1994, but it lacked support from someone who really believed in it. Enter Murray Calder, a former horse rancher and poultry farmer who was elected to Canada’s Parliament in 1993.

  In 1999, Calder reintroduced the bill to make the Canadian the country’s national horse, but his colleagues didn’t seem to give the idea even a yawn. The bill failed. During the next parliamentary session, Calder tried again—and failed again.

  Third Time Lucky

  Then, in 2001, Calder found an ally—powerful Canadian senator Lowell Murray, who pushed Calder’s bill through the Senate just as Calder reintroduced it in the House. Suddenly, the Canadian horse was a national issue. Heated debate followed:

 

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