“They certainly are,” Amy said. She rubbed her tummy, adding, “Maybe too good.”
Chapter Five
At the fire station, Steph and Ruth were working out on the new and improved gym equipment that Clementine had wrangled out of the city council. Now that Clementine was the mayor, she was making improvements all around town, including the fire station. Clementine had won by a landslide in a special election after Mayor Austin resigned under duress. He made the mistake of being a big-mouthed misogynist in a town environment already riled up by the hostile political climate courtesy of #notmypresident. On his way out the door, Mayor Austin said what most Republicans said when caught in a scandal, “I want to spend more time with my family.”
“I love these new weight stations. We can get so much done in a shorter period of time which gives us more time for cardio,” Ruth said.
“I wish I were as positive as you about working out,” Steph said. She did ten more reps on the pull-up bars.
“Really? You don’t like it?” Ruth asked, settling behind the leg press. She wiped her face with a white workout towel.
“I’d do the absolute minimum if it weren’t a job requirement.”
“Ah, come on, you like being buff. I see you smiling when all the young girls check you out,” Ruth said.
“Riiight,” Steph laughed. “If I were single, I’d never be a cougar. After the sex, you find out they’ve never heard of Married with Children or Mork & Mindy. They have no idea who Bette Midler is. And they think Stonewall was a real wall.”
“You have a point,” Ruth said between grunts.
“Have you seen those memes on Facebook wanting you to like this if you know what the thing is or what it was used for back in the day? I know all those things. Hell, I’ve got most of them still hanging around the house,” Steph said.
“I don’t have a Facebook page,” Ruth said.
“What d’ya mean? Everyone has Facebook.”
“Not this everyone,” Ruth said. She moved from the leg press to the curl bar.
“Why not? You could keep up on Tamika’s posts. It’s a perfect way to check her out before you ask her out. You look at her photos, what her other friends are like, see if she parties too much, what kind of a family she has, if they like to travel and where,” Steph said. “You know, that kind of stuff.”
“Sounds like stalking to me,” Ruth said.
“How do you expect to meet anyone?”
“In person would be good.”
Steph considered this. “There is that. So… Tamika. You see her every day and you talk face to face.”
“There is that,” Ruth said and smiled. She appreciated what Steph was trying to do for her. She liked Tamika, but it was complicated.
At that moment, the complication—Ruth’s bright and bouncy daughter. Cece—came running up the stairs giggling with her best friend, Sam.
Sam was the adopted son of Jeb and Clementine. At ten, he was small for his age, but he’d gotten off to a rough start. His mother had drug and alcohol issues and had lost custody. She finally agreed to let Jeb and Clementine adopt him. No one knew where she was now and that was probably for the best.
Ruth knew that kids were resilient. They recovered from tragedy more quickly than adults. Even Ruth’s daughter, Cece, had bounced back from her other mother’s disappearance. Her other mother, Lil, the one who’d wanted children so badly she talked Ruth into it, had run off when the challenges of parenting became too much for her. She chose the free and easy party life over the more mundane family life. Cece seemed okay with it after the initial tears about losing Mommy, but Ruth knew that deep down she was hurt. It was a hurt so big it would always be there and make her less trusting of those she loved.
Every once in a while, Cece would ask questions about her other mommy and Ruth would answer the best she could. She tried to answer honestly, while keeping the animosity out of her voice. Why had Mommy left? Had Cece done something to make her mad? Did she have cousins or a grandpa and grandma? She did, but Ruth didn’t want her to see those people, knowing that bringing those people into Cece’s life meant that Lil would also be involved. That was a can of worms she did not want opened. She never wanted to see Lil again.
Ruth hadn’t asked Lil for child support. She hoped that if Lil ever challenged her for joint custody then Ruth could hold that over her head. The lost child support would total thousands of dollars by now. It was money Ruth knew Lil didn’t have. Lil wasn’t exactly a go-getter. Her idea of success was landing a rich girlfriend. She worked various retail jobs, keeping them for a bit, then moving on when she got bored or fired. She liked getting downsized because that meant she could collect unemployment. She would collect the unemployment for as long as she could, then finally get another job.
Cece and Sam ran squealing into the weight room. Steph smiled wide when she saw the little ones, giving them each a high-five. “Wassup?” she asked. She always asked them that.
“The sky, the moon…” Sam began.
“The clouds, the stars…” Cece continued.
“Black holes,” Sam said.
“Planets and meteorites.”
“Wow, you guys get smarter every time I see you,” Steph said.
“It helps that you got them both an astronomy book for Christmas,” Ruth said.
Cece went to give Ruth a hug then backed away. “Yuck, Mommy! You’re all sweaty.”
“Yes, that happens when you work out,” Ruth said.
“Can I walk on the treadmill?” Sam asked.
“No. Not after last time,” Steph said.
“That was an accident,” Sam said defensively.
“An accident that almost got me fired,” Steph said.
Sam had gotten on the treadmill then turned it up so fast that his short legs couldn’t keep up and just like in the movies, he went flying off the back of it. Luckily, Steph had caught him before he sailed into the concrete wall. His head would’ve cracked open like a watermelon. Steph and Ruth had never quite gotten over that near miss.
Sam seemed to attract danger. He’d been kidnapped by his mother, escaping by hailing a cab after she had passed out in a bar. Then he’d been in a fire at the day care center. He managed to save himself and another little girl. Since then, he wanted to be a firefighter and came to the station every chance he could.
“Mommy, can we go to the Movies in the Park thingy? Luke said he’ll be the designated grown up. It’s Guardians of the Galaxy,” Cece said excitedly, hopping from one foot to the other.
“Luke’s never seen it. Can you believe it?” Sam said.
“That’s a downright crime,” Ruth said. “You two need to help him with that.”
“Does that mean we can go?” Cece asked. She switched from hopping side to side to jumping up and down.
“Yes, you can go. But you have to promise to mind Luke,” Ruth said.
“Yes!” the kids said at the same time. Sam fist-pumped first with one arm and then the other.
“I wish I had their energy,” Steph muttered.
“Cece has plenty of energy until chores have to be done,” Ruth said.
“Hey, kids, you want to help wash the fire truck?” Eric called up from the garage.
“Yes!” they both screamed. Sam ran to the fire pole and looked at it longingly. He had asked to slide down the pole a hundred times.
“Can I slide down it?” he asked, making it one hundred and one times.
“No way, buddy,” Steph said.
“Some day?” Sam asked.
“Some day,” Steph promised. When you’re eighteen and your mother won’t murder me if you break an arm, she thought.
The children ran down the stairs, punching and shoulder-bumping each other.
“I believe that’s child labor you’re using,” Ruth called down to Eric.
“No, it’s not,” Eric called up. “I’m not paying them.”
Ruth got on the stationary bike and raised an eyebrow at Steph. “Time for cardio.
Get off your lazy butt, Rizzo.”
Steph pulled her phone out of her pocket. “I just need to check with Millie and make sure she will be at the appointment. They’ve got target practice with Allen out at Top Gun. I don’t want them to get distracted and miss the big event.”
“What’s the big event?”
“Amy is having her ultrasound today.”
“Oh, I can’t imagine Millie and her crew forgetting about that. Are all of them going?”
Steph rolled her eyes in response. “What do you think?”
“Stupid question,” Ruth said. As she pedaled her bike, she thought of her own ultrasound. What a moment that had been. She’d been scared and elated at the same time. She had watched as the nurse practitioner lubed up her stomach. She ran the wand over Ruth’s growing belly. Lil sat beside her, holding her hand, giving it a squeeze for good luck. The moment of truth, Ruth had thought, all your hopes and dreams, tied up in a photo that revealed if your baby was healthy and problem-free. And then there Cece was, looking a bit like a boiled shrimp, but healthy and normal. Lil had been so excited to see the soon-to-be baby.
What had happened to that excitement, Ruth wondered. Maybe Lil was only excited by the thought of a baby and it was the reality that made her run.
What Lil had envisioned parenthood to be, Ruth never knew. That day with the ultrasound was the best day of Ruth’s pregnancy. She was blissfully ignorant of what the future would bring.
The day Ruth gave birth she tried to hand the baby to Lil. Lil took a step backward, saying, “No, thanks. I’d probably just drop her or something.”
Lil had never held Cece. That thought sometimes brought tears to Ruth’s eyes. Not for herself, but for Cece. How horrible to have a mother that wouldn’t hold you.
Ruth knew that Amy and Parker would be the kind of couple who would rise to the challenges—they would be what Ruth had hoped she and Lil could’ve been. She was happy for them, despite the pang in her own heart.
***
Amy and Parker were not surprised at what awaited them in the lobby of the obstetrician’s office. Millie, Aunt Bernie, Mabel, Clara, and Edna took up most of the waiting room.
Dr. Chen’s office was on the OB-GYN floor. In a town the size of Fenton, the hospital also housed most of the doctors’ offices.
Amy liked Dr. Chen. She was a petite Asian woman, with almond-shaped eyes and long dark hair pulled back in a bun. She looked to be about twelve, but was actually somewhere in her thirties. She was young enough to make Amy feel old.
“Are you surprised to see us?” Mabel asked, standing and hiking up her leather chaps. She was dressed in a red and white plaid western shirt, a red handkerchief tied around her neck, and cowboy boots. Her leather holster was slung low on her hips. She bore a striking resemblance to Howdy Doody.
Mabel’s holsters were empty, which made Amy breathe a little easier. She had heard that Mabel was becoming a regular sharpshooter. Allen, the owner of Top Gun, had even entered her in the annual shooting competition. Still, Amy was glad that Mabel hadn’t brought her guns with her. Though she supposed that if a person were to suffer from an accidental shooting, a hospital was the place to be.
“No,” Parker said. “I’d be surprised if you weren’t here.”
“Then why didn’t you tell us what time the appointment was going to be?” Mabel asked, screwing up her face and crossing her arms over her chest.
“Because that would take the detective work out of it,” Parker said.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Mabel asked.
“She means that the grapevine would have been underutilized and we’d have experienced a glitch in the system,” Clara said, grabbing Mabel’s hand in an attempt to get her to sit down. She was making the two pregnant women in the waiting room very nervous.
Edna grabbed Mabel’s other arm and managed to pull her into a chair. Clara smiled her appreciation.
“They made me leave my guns in the car. Can you believe that?” Mabel said indignantly.
“Yes, I can,” Parker said.
“What if a meth head gets brought in? And he goes nutso and pulls a knife? My two six-shooters would bring him down fast,” Mabel said.
Aunt Bernie stood up and gave Amy her seat. “How are you feeling?” Bernie asked.
“I haven’t thrown up in three whole days,” Amy said. “Rascal is finally getting some much-needed rest.”
“He finds vomiting very alarming,” Parker said.
“He’s been spending a lot of time with me in the bathroom,” Amy added. “I left him at the office, snoring peacefully under my desk.”
“I’m glad you’re feeling better, dear,” Millie said, patting her hand. “A lot of women have tummy trouble at first. Then it evens out.”
This was the first time Amy had seen Millie not dressed in her active wear. She wasn’t as cowgirled up as Mabel, but she was dressed in jeans, a black western shirt with a white yoke and white piping, and black cowboy boots. Bernie was dressed the same, only her shirt was midnight blue. They’d been a couple long enough to be dressing alike. Edna and Clara wore jeans, boots, and bedazzled T-shirts. Edna had gotten a bedazzling kit for Christmas and to every shirt she could get her hands on, she added her own unique flair.
Clara had confided in Amy that she no longer owned a shirt that wasn’t bedazzled. She felt like a walking, talking disco ball. Amy thought Clara was a saint for putting up with Mabel and then Edna.
“I think I’m through the worst of it,” Amy said. She sighed and rapped her knuckles on the fake wood chair arm.
“Until that little critter inside you rips the hell out of your vagina,” Mabel said. “I watch those nature documentaries on TV. Believe me, it’s a horrible, bloody mess.”
The other two pregnant women in the office blanched and one of them looked like she might cry.
Clara slapped Mabel’s arm. “Will you please be quiet.”
“Just sayin’,” Mabel said. “Facts are facts. Forcing a baby out the birth canal is like a Saint Bernard trying to get out the cat door.”
Suddenly, there was a screeching wail and much commotion coming from the corridor. It sounded as if someone were kicking and screaming as they were dragged down the hall.
Mabel popped up out of her chair like a jack-in-the-box. “I told you one of them meth heads would get in here! I need my guns!”
Susan stuck her head in the office door. She smiled at the women, saying, “It’s not a meth head, Mabel. It’s Henry Morris on his way to get a tetanus shot. He stepped on a rusty nail.”
“Silly boy, can’t take a needle,” Mabel said.
“If I recall, Susan had to chase you around the exam room to give you a flu shot,” Clara said.
Susan and the rest of the group laughed.
“Hmmph. I don’t recall,” Mabel grumped.
“I do,” Susan said. “I skipped my workout at the gym because I’d already gotten my exercise for the day.” She looked at Amy. “I expect to hear all about your appointment afterwards.”
“Absolutely,” Amy replied.
A boy’s voice yelled from the hallway, “You can’t make me! You can’t make me get a shot!”
“Okay, duty calls. Good luck,” Susan said. She disappeared back out to the hallway.
Mabel plopped back down in her chair. “Let’s get this show on the road,” she said impatiently, clacking her boot heels together.
“Stop doing that. You’re making Amy nervous,” Clara said.
“Here, read a magazine,” Millie said, pulling a stack of magazines from her bedazzled canvas book bag. She passed the magazines around, skipping over Amy and Parker.
Amy did a double take at the magazines all the women were leafing through rapidly as if they were speed reading. “Bridal magazines? Why is everyone looking at bridal magazines?”
“We’re all going to help you plan the wedding,” Edna said brightly.
Amy gulped. She hoped that help didn’t include a bedazzled wedding dress.<
br />
“We’ve got to get you two hitched before the little one shreds your vagina,” Mabel said.
Parker looked alarmed. “Did you ask them to help?” she asked Amy.
“I may have mentioned that we’re still having trouble deciding on things,” Amy said. “And that we could use a little push in the right direction.”
“Trouble? That’s an understatement. You two have been trying to get married for almost a year,” Mabel said.
“Mabel, don’t be rude. Putting on a wedding is not an easy task,” Clara said.
“Pish. Just go down to the courthouse and put the whole thing to rest,” Mabel said.
“They want it to be special. Getting married is a big deal.” Millie said in their defense.
“Waste of damn time if you ask me,” Mabel said. Then her face lit up. She held up her magazine. It was opened to a layout of a fairy wedding. Bride and groom were dressed in fairy costumes with wings and gauzy outfits. The bride looked like Tinkerbell and the groom looked like a horned forest creature. “Look at this,” Mabel said, jabbing her finger at the page. “It’s a goddamn fairy wedding.”
Parker leaned in to take a better look. “I’m not much for fairies, but Amy would look cute in wings. I’d just look like a big bug.”
“You could be like a forest nymph. They don’t have wings,” Edna said, getting into the spirit of the thing.
Millie leaned toward Amy and whispered, “That Justice of the Peace thing must be looking pretty good right now.”
“Um, yeah,” Amy said.
“How about a cowgirl wedding?” Bernie asked. “Most of us already have the clothes for it. Then we could have a cookout. I bet Old Man Turner would let us borrow one of his antique covered wagons. Just to add some authenticity to the whole shebang.”
“And we could have a shoot-out like in those ghost town tourist attractions. Allen could help us with that,” Mabel said. “It’d add some spice.”
Edna piped up, “It’d be a wedding nobody would soon forget, that’s for sure.”
“Just let them get it out of their system. It’ll all come out all right,” Clara whispered to Amy and Parker.
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