by June Belfie
“I hope Gott gives me a talent someday.”
“He already has,” Beth assured her. “You are gut with your hands. You make nice stitches already and someday, you’ll be a quilter like your grossmammi.”
“Maybe,” she said as she released her aunt’s hand and ran to catch up to her brothers.
“Would you like to have lunch at a restaurant someday with me, when you’re free?” Josiah asked abruptly.
“I guess so. You’ll be too busy, won’t you?”
“I can’t work twenty-four hours a day. As soon as I’m making some money, I hope to hire someone to help out in the display room. That way, I can work on filling orders. Of course, that won’t be for a while.”
“Maybe your business will take off sooner than you expect. I’ll pray for you.”
“Denki. I appreciate your prayers. I pray for you, too, you know.”
“Jah?” she asked looking over at him. His expression was serious. “What do you pray?”
“Uh, for your health and of course I pray for your whole family.”
“Of course. So let me know when you want to go out to a restaurant with me. I’ll try to work it out. It will probably have to be on a Saturday.”
He nodded. “Denki. I will.”
The supper went well and Beth managed to stay throughout his whole visit. He talked a lot about Ohio and told some amusing stories about some of the Amish who lived there. He was never mean-spirited and spoke kindly of his friends. A nice trait, she thought, as she noted his tall frame and rich dark hair. He was indeed a pleasant enough man. And he was Amish.
The first day of school went reasonably well. The school was close enough for the children to walk from their homes. They carried their bright colored lunch pails with them and the older children held the hands of the younger children. Anna showed up with her children and stayed to help out. Another young mother joined them. There were thirty-five scholars in attendance, so it would have been difficult for Beth to handle everything by herself. The children were still restless from their summer freedom, but once the class came to order, Beth read from the Bible and they said the Lord’s Prayer in English. Many of the new children knew very little English, since the Pennsylvania Deitsch was spoken in their homes almost exclusively. Beth spoke both languages as she taught, but stressed the importance of learning English.
Beth started her lessons with the first and second graders after giving assignments to the older grades.
There were no major issues, though her own young nephews were the most rambunctious of the group, and she wondered if their behavior was worse with their mother present. She wouldn’t mention that thought to Anna, since she truly appreciated her help with the older students. The other mother listened to some of the readers in her own son’s fourth grade class. All in all, it was a good day.
After all the students left for the day, Beth laid her head on the teacher’s desk and closed her eyes. She was exhausted. It was far easier to work on the farm than teach. What had she gotten herself into? She would stick with her decision and commitment—if it killed her!
After a few minutes of rest, she walked home. It was only a mile and a few of the trees were beginning to change color, though the mixed greens of summer foliage still prevailed. She loved the early fall and breathed the cooler air deeply into her lungs. Life was good. She heard a car coming up behind her and it slowed down as it passed her. Then it stopped altogether. Goodness, was it safe to continue? Her heart began to beat rapidly as she saw the driver lower the window on the driver’s side. Then a familiar face appeared, grinning at her. “Hello, Beth. Remember me?”
Randy Gordon’s hazel eyes rattled her as she came close to the side of the car. “Oh, jah, of course. How are you?”
“Good. Didn’t expect to run into you today. Where are you headed? Do you want me to drive you?”
“I just taught school. First day. I can walk, though. It’s not far.”
“Why not let me drive you home? I imagine you’re a bit tired since it’s your first day.”
She laughed. “How did you know? Okay, it’s only about a half mile.”
He reached across the seat and opened the passenger side. After she got in, he suggested she put on her seatbelt. “If you don’t, it will beep at you relentlessly.”
After hooking it in place, he started off down the road. “I’ve thought about you so often, Beth. You haven’t been back to buy coffee and now they don’t need me there anymore, so…”
“Why would we see each other again? I’m living up to my decision. You know, there’s absolutely no future for us. Never was. We’re from two different worlds. You said so yourself.”
“That may be, but for some reason, I still think about you—too much, I guess. You look well.”
“Jah, I’m fine. And you?”
“I’m good. Busy at the bank. I’m surprised how busy it’s been in this slow economy.”
“Job security?”
He smiled. “Absolutely.”
“You’re almost there. It’s the farmhouse on the left. The one with a green roof.”
“Nice place. Beautiful land. No wonder you want to stay Amish.”
“That’s only one reason.”
“I’m sure.”
She looked over at him before opening the car door. “Denki. My feet were sore.”
“Hope I’ll see you again, even if it’s just as a friend. Stop by the bank if you’re in town around noon and I’ll treat you to pizza at my favorite place.”
“Sure.”
He opened the window from his side and smiled as she made her way across the lawn. “Take care.”
Then he drove off. She stopped and stood watching till he was out of sight. He certainly had an effect on her emotions. Probably just because he was so handsome and suave—compared to some of the guys she knew. She thought about Josiah and put the two together in her head. How ridiculous. Childish! She shook the thoughts out of her mind and walked quickly to the back door where she let herself in.
Rose was peeling potatoes. “Well, how was your day, Beth? Kids wear you out?”
“Jah, but it went okay. Anna was there to help.”
“She told me she was planning to come by.”
“Do you need help with supper?” Beth asked as she washed her hands and dried them.
“Nee. You take a break. Oh, I ran into Lydia Cook at the market today. I invited her to supper tonight. Hope you’re not too tired to see one of your old friends. She’s not married either.”
“Goodness, I thought she had moved to Chester County.”
“She was there for the last four years, but now she came back. Said she missed her family too much. That’s sweet, don’t you think?”
“Sure. I hope she doesn’t stay long tonight, though. I’m pretty tired. I need to prepare for tomorrow’s class.”
“She mentioned she’s looking to work part time. She’s bored at home, and with five younger schwesters and two bruders, they don’t need her at the farm. Maybe you can hire her as an aide. You said the board mentioned that if you needed help, you could look for someone to lend a hand?”
“Jah. They don’t pay much, but I could use help and Anna doesn’t want to come in too often. She’s so busy at home—plus she needs a break from her kinner.”
“Just a thought.”
“I’ll set up an extra place after I take a break.”
Rose nodded and Beth went to her room first. She removed her prayer kapp and let her hair down. Then she took off her dress and laid on the bed. Two men’s faces flashed through her mind again. “Nee,” she said aloud, “it would never work. Do not take him up on his offer!” With resolve she closed her eyes and dozed off for nearly half an hour and awoke determined to forget about Randal Gordon.
When Beth came down, her friend, Lydia, was already there. She was sitting at the kitchen table watching Rose as she stirred the beef stew.
“Beth, how gut to see you again,” she said as she stood to give her
friend a hug.
Beth had forgotten how pretty her friend was with her bright red hair and crystal blue eyes. Her slightly round face was freckled and her eyes danced as she spoke.
“Same here. I’m so glad you moved back to the area. Mamm told me you got homesick.”
“I did. I really missed everyone so much. I’ll never leave again.”
The girls caught up on the news of the neighborhood as they set the table together. Lydia told her she’d been serious with a young Amish man in Chester County, but it soon ended when she found out he was also seeing a friend of hers on the sly. “I need a man I can trust,” she added as she folded napkins and laid them next to the forks.
“Oh jah. It’s so important.”
“What about you, Beth? Anyone interesting?”
“Not really. I’m quite content to live at home and teach. You heard I was the new teacher, I guess.”
“Jah, your mamm told me. I was surprised actually. You never seemed to like working that much with kinner. I remember you left the aide job.”
“Well, kinner are okay once you lay down the rules.”
“I was sorry to hear about Anna’s loss. It must have been very hard on her.”
“It still is. She has a hard time trying to be mamm and daed at the same time.”
“I’m sure. Maybe she’ll find a man who will take over the job of fathering for her.”
“I doubt that will happen. She and Jeremiah were so close. She has no interest in another man in her life.”
“But for the sake of the children…”
“Jah, perhaps in time. Are you back in your parents’ home?’
“For now. It’s fun being with the family again. My little schwesters are nearly all grown up. I have two new nephews, too. Twins. Did you hear?”
“Jah, that makes six kinner for Nathan and his wife, right?”
“Seven. I don’t know how they do it. So I’ll probably help her out now that I’m back, though I’d like to work part-time to make a little spending money.”
“Maybe you can help me at the school. It doesn’t pay much, but it would be something.”
“That sounds ever so gut. Are you serious?”
“Jah, but you’d have to go to the school board to be interviewed. I’ll talk to Job Schwartz about it. He’s coming by tomorrow to check on everything.”
“I’m excited. I just hope I’ll do a gut job. What I really like doing is arithmetic. I’ve been reading about bookkeeping on the side. A neighbor back in Chester County had a small contracting business and he paid me to keep his books. It was fun.”
“Really? Maybe you can help with the school’s books, though I think the board tries to do all that.”
“It’s okay.”
Isaiah came in from the fields and washed up for supper. He remembered Lydia and greeted her warmly. After supper, Lydia helped with clean-up and then left for home.
The next day, Job Schwartz stopped by while Beth was teaching. Since he knew Lydia and her family, he gave his okay for her to work as an aide. The money wasn’t much, but the responsibilities rested on Beth. On the way home later, Beth stopped to tell Lydia she had the job. The girls hugged and Beth felt a weight drop off her. It really would help to have someone she could count on, though nearly every day, some of the mothers would stop in to observe and lend a hand. It was a close community. That was one reason Beth would try very hard to find an Amish man to marry. She only hoped she could learn to love a man as deeply as Anna had. There weren’t many men with the qualities of Jeremiah, though one man came close. A man named Josiah.
Chapter Eleven
Abe Stoltzfus laid his Bible down on his lap and put his head back on the rocker, closing his eyes at the same time. What a long difficult day it had been. And now his loneliness was enough to sicken him. He actually felt his stomach lurch— perhaps from Fraa Broad’s chili. The family had finally finished the huge casserole she’d brought over on Monday. He’d never eaten anything so spicy. Mary had been a good cook, but stuck to simple familiar Dutch meals, avoiding heavy spices. That’s what he was used to. But no more.
He swallowed with difficulty as her sweet smile and joyful laughter came to his mind. Oh, my. It seemed only like yesterday, though two months had passed since that horrible day when he’d lost not only his dear wife, but Harvey, Robert and Ruth. Harvey would be turning six this month and Robert would be nine and a half. What a tough little man he’d become. Strong as his cousin who was the same age and two inches taller. And then his darling Ruth. At the tender age of eleven, she’d already earned a reputation for making the best rice pudding in the family, as well as unsurpassed relish maker. She had wanted twelve children someday.
That day would never come. He should have driven that day when they went to the auction, but he had a headache. Goodness, a headache. What a stupid reason to stay home. Bishop Gingrich reprimanded him for blaming himself, reminding him that it was the Lord’s will. “The Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away.”
“But why, Lord? Why was it their time already?”
For the first time in weeks, Abe allowed his tears to flow. He’d been so strong for the kinner who were left. Their hearts near broke at the news. What choice did he have? But tonight, his two sons, John and Benny aged ten and eight, were already asleep and his sister had taken three-year-old Alice to her place for a couple days, just to give him some time to get his work done. The boys could manage, but Allie was too young. She required so much of his time, as well as energy.
He wondered if he was going to make it, but then he had no choice. God would continue to provide the strength as He already had during these difficult days. Abe felt the results of prayer as his community and loved ones lifted him up to God. Jah, without the gut Lord, it would be even more terrible. He wiped his eyes with his sleeve. It had helped to weep. Somehow keeping it bottled up all the time made it even harder. Sometimes, it felt as if he’d explode from the unspoken pain.
When he went upstairs an hour later, guided by the light of his propane lamp, he heard a muffled cry coming from the boys’ room. He tiptoed in to find Johnny sobbing into his pillow. “Bu, bu,” he whispered, “come in the hall. You’ll wake your bruder.”
Johnny allowed his father to guide him by the elbow out into the dark hallway where he felt his father’s muscular arms encircle his young frame. “It’s so hard sometimes, Daed. I’m sorry I’m being a boppli.”
“Nee, Johnny, you’re not a boppli. You’re a boy who misses his mamm and the kinner. It’s natural to be hurtin.”
“But you’re so strong…”
“Not so. I broke down myself and look at me. A big man.”
Johnny pulled back to see if his father was telling the truth. He never knew him to lie, but had he really wept himself?
Abe nodded. “Jah, we are going to suffer for a long time, but we will make it, Sohn. That’s what your mamm would have wanted—for us not to grieve forever, but to stand straight and tall and accept what happened. You and me, we have to be the strong ones now for Benny and Allie.”
“Jah, poor Allie, she sure needs a mamm. Girls need mamms even more than guys.”
“Perhaps you’re right. I don’t know about that. Gut thing your Aenti Naomi is next door to help out.”
“Allie loves it there. She even thinks she helps with the boppli.”
“Oh jah, she does. She sure does. Aenti Naomi says her little one smiles every time she sees Allie. Your schewester even helps change her diaper sometimes.”
“She’s real brave. Daed, can you teach me to use the farm stuff this year, so I can help you?”
“In time bu. Don’t rush into being a man too soon.”
“I know, but it’s a lot of work for you to do by yourself, Daed.”
“When it’s time for harvesting, I’ll have plenty of help. My bruders and schwogers will come lend a hand. Gut thing I have my schwesters married off.”
“So their husbands can help?”
“Jah.” He laugh
ed softly. “Schwogers come in handy sometimes. How about if we go down and see if there’s any of your aenti’s chocolate cake left.”
Johnny’s eyes lit up. “I’ll split it with you, Daed.”
“I’ll cut it in half and you choose which half. How’s that for a gut idea?”
“I like it. You never cut even.” Hand-in-hand they walked down the dark staircase to the kitchen to spend a few special moments together before the dawn would arrive and another difficult day would be staring them in the face. Thank God for their community, which gave so much of their time and support. It was the glue that kept the Amish together. That and their mutual love for God.
Lancaster County
Anna decided against helping at the school after the first week. She suspected that her sister would be relieved, since the boys were acting up outrageously and perhaps without her presence, they’d settle down and listen. It was nice to have time to herself—at first.
The first week she was alone, she cleaned the house from top to bottom, scrubbing vigorously to remove every fingerprint and scuff mark she could find. At night, she fell asleep quickly from her exhaustion. When she wasn’t cleaning, she’d head to her parents’ home and work on canning with her mother. It felt good to have energy again.
The second week was harder. Not physically, but mentally, she had too much time to think. Think about Jeremiah. Though she was not supposed to have photographs, she had tucked one away which an English friend had taken with a phone at their wedding.
She smiled as she remembered how the three of them had slipped out of the barn and hidden behind an outhouse for the picture. No one had seen them do it. Just her friend who took it and Jeremiah and herself. She was so thankful for it now. Sometimes she looked at it when she was alone outside, after tucking it in her apron pocket.
Today she took it out of its hiding place in her top drawer of the dresser, which she had shared with her husband, and went to the window for better light. They positively glowed from happiness. It seemed the whole world was ahead for them. Who would have guessed eleven years later he would suffer a massive heart attack and be taken to his maker?