Judy finally made it home and to the meal Calvin had prepared. This she was going to miss. After they’d eaten, Calvin suggested they all go out for a walk with a delighted Miller. The village was alight with twinkling fairy lights in the windows and draped through trees and bushes. Although it was a chilly evening with snow still on the ground, the festive feel of being out with her family gave her a warm glow as she walked along the canal with her hand encased in her husband’s. She couldn’t remember the last time they’d held hands before the wish.
‘Can we sing a song?’ Charlie asked as they arrived at the green and stopped beside the lit-up tree. ‘Like we did when they switched the lights on?’
‘No way,’ Scott said. ‘We’ll look like a bunch of geeks.’
Judy ruffled Scott’s hair. ‘And what is wrong with that?’ Without waiting for an answer, Judy began to sing ‘Jingle Bells’. Charlie joined in immediately, shortly followed by Calvin and eventually a mumbling Scott. Judy put her arms around Charlie and Calvin, resting her head on her husband’s shoulder. Despite the absurdity of the wish, this Christmas was shaping up to be a pretty perfect one. It would be quite a while before she got over the guilt of missing Charlie’s nativity play, but it was surely worth that one sacrifice to see the adoration in Calvin’s eyes as they’d watched their daughter perform in her ballet class’s Christmas show the previous evening. Judy had known then that, no matter what, Calvin would always do his best to be there for his children. And she also knew that, no matter what, she would understand if he couldn’t always attend these special but small events. He would want to be there and that was good enough for her.
‘Come on, let’s go home for hot chocolates and a Christmas film.’ Judy took hold of Charlie and Calvin’s hands while Calvin placed a hand on Scott’s shoulder (the only contact he would tolerate in public) and the four of them made their way across the village.
‘Can we watch Frozen?’ Charlie asked.
‘No, Die Hard,’ Scott insisted.
‘But that’s not a Christmas film.’
‘Neither is Frozen.’
‘There’s a snowman and a reindeer.’
Judy could sense her cosy idea was about to fall apart. ‘How about Elf?’
‘Yes!’
With the film agreed upon, the family made their way home, snuggling up on the sofa (or as close to snuggling as Scott would allow) with hot chocolates and a giant bowl of popcorn. The children were wearing their new festive pyjamas (which Scott insisted were lame but wore anyway). Once the film had finished, the children went up to bed without any fuss with the knowledge that the sooner they went to sleep, the sooner Christmas would come. Calvin read them The Night Before Christmas (which Scott insisted he was too old for before settling himself on his sister’s bed to listen anyway) while Judy washed the dishes.
‘Shall we go up to bed too?’ Calvin asked when he returned to the sitting room. ‘The sooner we go to sleep, the sooner Christmas is here.’
‘And then everything should be back to normal.’ Judy couldn’t wait to take possession of her own body again. Calvin’s body had taken a lot of getting used to and, while she had mastered the art of peeing standing up, she was looking forward to being herself again.
‘But things aren’t going to go back to how they were,’ Calvin said. ‘I’m going to help out more and we’re going to take turns at walking the dog.’ Miller, who was curled up in front of the fire, pricked his ears up but settled down again when there was no further mention of walks. ‘Really. I mean it, Judy. I’m going to change and be a better husband and father.’
‘And I’m not going to whinge whenever you want to go to the pub with your mates. I had no idea how stressful your job is.’
‘Are you kidding? I’ll gladly go back to sitting at my desk. My feet are killing me.’ Calvin pointed at the pink fluffy slippers he’d grown quite fond of. ‘Not to mention my back. And my fingers!’ Calvin held out a hand, splaying his fingers. ‘They’re aching from all the kneading.’
‘I’ve missed the baking, actually.’ Apart from the batch of mince pies she’d taken into the office that morning and the baking for the Christmas fair, she hadn’t touched her mixing bowl for two weeks. ‘And I’ve missed the kids. I feel like I’ve hardly seen them.’
‘That’s going to change too. I’m going to spend more time with Scott and Charlie. And you.’
Judy smiled at her husband. ‘I’d like that.’
Calvin wrapped his arms around Judy and kissed the top of her head. ‘Everything’s going to change. I promise.’
Chapter Twenty-Four:
All I Want for Christmas Is Me
‘Mummy! Daddy!’
The sound of Charlie’s excited howl swiftly followed by the crashing of their bedroom door woke Judy and Calvin. They’d barely opened their eyes before the child-sized missile flew through the air and landed between them on the bed with a thud.
‘Mummy! Has he been? Has he been?’
Judy blinked slowly at her daughter. Charlie was bouncing up and down as she awaited her answer. And it was Judy’s bladder she was using as a trampoline. Judy she was staring at. Judy who was expected to answer in the affirmative.
‘Mummy! Has he beeeeen?’ Charlie continued her trampoline championships routine. ‘Has he? Has he?’
‘Yes, darling. I think he has.’ Judy turned to Calvin, who was grinning at her. It had been two weeks since she’d seen her husband’s handsome face without looking in the mirror. ‘Why don’t you go and wake Scott up and we’ll all go down together and see?’
Charlie gave one last bounce before she hopped off the bed and raced off to her brother’s bedroom.
‘We’ve changed back, Judy.’ Calvin leapt from the bed and scurried over to the dressing table, where he pulled faces in the mirror. Instead of Judy’s face gurning back at him, it was his own reflection he saw. He gave a whoop and jumped back onto the bed, Charlie-style. ‘We’ve changed back! I’m me and you’re you.’ Calvin took his wife’s face in his hands – a face he had missed. It wasn’t the same waking up to his own – and kissed it all over.
‘Mummy! Scott won’t get out of bed!’ Charlie burst back into the room. ‘He says it’s still Christmas Eve. Ewww, are you kissing?’
‘It’s definitely Christmas Day, darling.’ Ignoring the kissing query, Judy climbed out of bed and scooped a giggling Charlie up. ‘It’s the best Christmas Day ever so let’s go and drag that lazy brother of yours out of bed.’
‘And then can we open our presents?’
‘Don’t you want breakfast first?’
Charlie shook her head. ‘Not hungry.’
‘Not even for bacon sandwiches with loads of ketchup?’ Calvin asked.
Charlie scrunched up her nose in thought. ‘I’m maybe a tiny bit hungry.’
‘Then why don’t you and Mummy go and prise Scott from his bed and I’ll go and make a start on breakfast?’ Charlie nodded. ‘Off you go then, sweetie.’
‘Da-ad.’ Charlie rolled her eyes. ‘You’re doing it again. Mummy calls me sweetie.’
Calvin caught Judy’s eye. It would take some getting used to being in their old bodies again.
By the time Judy and Charlie had coaxed Scott out of bed, the bacon sandwiches were well under way but there was just enough time to open a present or two before breakfast. Scott’s reluctance to begin the day evaporated as soon as he caught sight of the mountain of gifts and he and Charlie started to tornado their way through the wrapping paper.
‘What’s this?’ Judy moved towards the tree and plucked the small gift-wrapped box from its branches. A small envelope was attached to the ribbon with a note inside, which Judy and Calvin read together.
Merry Christmas, Judy and Calvin! By now you should be feeling more like yourselves. I’ve left a little gift for you. Hang it on the tree each year and you’ll never forget this Christmas and the lessons it has hopefully taught you. Love, Christmas Fairy.
‘Like we could ever forget this Chri
stmas.’ Judy tucked the note back into its envelope before opening their gift. Inside the tissue paper-lined box lay a delicate star made out of the palest blue glass that shimmered as it caught the light. Calvin hung it on the tree by its fine silver ribbon and took Judy’s hand in his.
‘I meant what I said last night. Things are going to be different from now on. I won’t take you for granted again.’
‘We won’t take each other for granted.’ Judy reached up on tiptoes to kiss her husband. It had been the craziest Christmas imaginable but both Judy and Calvin had been taught a valuable lesson.
‘Merry Christmas, Judy.’
‘Merry Christmas, Calvin.’
As the couple kissed, Calvin felt a tug on his sleeve. When he looked down, Charlie was grimacing up at him.
‘It smells burny, Daddy.’
With a yelp, Calvin released Judy and made a frantic dash from the room to rescue the bacon and their kitchen. Judy reached out to touch the glass star with gentle fingers.
Yes, it had been a very strange – often horrendous – two weeks but Judy couldn’t have been more grateful for the experience.
Epilogue:
A New Year
Judy couldn’t remember the last time she had been out to celebrate New Year’s Eve, but it must have been before Scott was born. She was usually at home, fighting sleep as she waited for the fireworks to start, and would be tucked up in bed by a quarter past twelve. This year, however, she and Laura had ventured into the White Swan for the evening. The pub was packed but everyone was in good spirits.
‘Do you think I should ring Calvin? Make sure he’s all right with the kids?’ Laura bit her lip, her phone already in hand. ‘They can be a bit of a handful.’
True to his word, Calvin had offered to babysit and was currently at home with Scott, Charlie and Laura’s brood.
‘You will not.’ Judy grabbed Laura’s phone and popped it back into her friend’s handbag. ‘Calvin will be fine. We’re out to have fun, not spend the night worrying.’
The change in the Neil family dynamics was most welcome. A rota had been set up for dog-walking while bedtime and homework duties were shared equally and Calvin had taken over cooking at the weekends. The children had their own little jobs around the house to earn their pocket money and Sunday afternoons were now dedicated to family time, with no excuses permitted.
‘You’re right.’ Laura gave a decisive nod of her head. She wasn’t given this opportunity very often and she wasn’t going to squander it. ‘Shall I get another round in?’
Judy drained her glass of wine. ‘Absolutely.’
The pair went to the bar, where Judy saw a familiar face. ‘Sarah! You came!’ She couldn’t believe Calvin’s colleague was standing in front of her but she was happy to see her again. It had only been a week, but Judy felt like months had passed. She’d missed Sarah.
‘Judy?’ A wavering smile appeared on Sarah’s lips and Judy realised she had never met Sarah as Judy before. Would the confusion of this body swapping never end?
‘Yes.’ Judy stuck out a hand, which Sarah gave a tentative shake. ‘Hello. Calvin showed me your photo on the company’s website.’
‘Oh. Okay.’ Sarah looked terribly uncomfortable, which was understandable. Here she was with the wife of a colleague, a wife she had never met before now and whose husband she had kissed.
‘I’m glad you could come,’ Judy said. Calvin had invited Sarah to the pub at Judy’s insistence. It was probably a little strange for Sarah, but Judy thought they could be good friends. ‘Calvin said you had no plans, which is a shame, what with it being New Year’s Eve.’
Sarah nodded. ‘All my friends are off doing loved-up couples things and I’m single so …’ She shrugged her shoulders. ‘Here I am.’
‘I’m glad you are. This is my friend, Laura.’ Judy thrust her friend forward before she came across as weird and clingy. ‘Laura, this is Calvin’s colleague, Sarah.’
The women said hello and thankfully, after a couple of drinks, they all began to loosen up and it transpired they had a lot in common. The group swelled in numbers when Curtis arrived with Pierce, Richie and Danielle in tow. Danielle seemed relieved to have some female company, which Judy didn’t find at all surprising.
‘Where’s Calvin?’ Curtis asked.
‘He’s babysitting,’ Judy replied, expecting a series of jokes at her husband’s expense, but none were forthcoming. Instead, the conversation turned to the classical Christmas concert Richie and Danielle had attended on Christmas Eve.
‘It was magical.’ Danielle gazed at Richie and gave his hand a squeeze. ‘It was the best early Christmas present ever.’
‘Was that the one at Bridgewater Hall?’ Sarah asked. ‘I would have loved that.’
Danielle nodded. ‘It was amazing. You should come with us next time.’
‘I’d be up for that,’ Curtis said. Judy gave him a quizzical look, but it soon became clear that it wasn’t the classical music he was interested in. He couldn’t take his eyes off Sarah.
‘So what is it you do?’ Sarah asked later when they had a moment together at the bar. The group had moulded itself together seamlessly so they hadn’t had the chance to chat individually until now. ‘Calvin said something about baking?’
‘I’m a waitress at a tea room,’ Judy replied. ‘And I do some baking on the side.’
But all that was about to change. With some encouragement from Calvin, Judy had decided to take the plunge and set up her own baking business. She was starting out small and would still be supplying Enid with the usual cakes and biscuits, but she would no longer be waitressing once Enid had found a replacement. Judy would be baking full-time, catering for parties and events and creating bespoke celebration cakes. She already had a booking for the christening of Mrs Freeman’s great-niece in the New Year.
‘Do you need a hand?’ Curtis asked. The drinks were all lined up on the bar but there were too many for Judy and Sarah to carry in one trip.
‘Thanks,’ Judy said, loading Curtis up with glasses to carry over to their table. Together they just about managed.
‘It’s nearly midnight,’ Laura said when they returned with the drinks.
‘Let’s hope next year is better than this one,’ Danielle said, smiling at Richie.
‘I’ll drink to that,’ Sarah said, lifting her glass.
Judy excused herself, moving outside where it was quieter. She wanted to phone Calvin and wish him a Happy New Year as the clock struck midnight.
‘How are you getting on?’ she asked. There was silence in the background, which was either good news or the most terrible news.
‘They’re all asleep apart from Scott and Bobby. I said they could stay up until midnight as they’re a bit older. Is that okay?’
Judy was impressed Calvin was coping so well. ‘That’s fine. You’re doing great. Thanks for this.’
‘It’s long overdue,’ Calvin said. ‘I hope you’re having a good time.’
‘I am. It’s been fun.’ Judy could hear the countdown from inside the pub, followed by a loud cheer. ‘Happy New Year.’
‘Happy New Year. I love you.’
Judy smiled. ‘I love you too.’
‘And Judy?’
‘Yes Calvin?’
‘I’ve one more resolution. I’ll never eat another mince pie. Ever.’
Judy laughed. They’d well and truly learned their lesson there. ‘Agreed.’
When she returned inside, her group had paired off, with Richie and Danielle celebrating the New Year with a smooch. Curtis and Sarah were locked together and, more surprisingly, so were Laura and Pierce. Deciding to leave them to it, Judy crept out of the pub again. She sent a quick text to Laura to let her friend know she’d gone home – if she ever prised herself away from Pierce, that is. Judy and her husband had a bit of New Year smooching to do themselves.
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The Mince Pie Mix-Up © 2015 Jennifer Joyce
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