She ferreted a fruit bar from her bag and wrinkled her nose in disgust. “I don’t suppose you’ve got anything less healthy on you?” she asked Jeremy as they walked side by side to the plane.
“Nah. Sorry, mate.”
“Too bad.” While Jeremy stowed her luggage she finished the breakfast substitute, but the hollow feeling in her stomach only intensified. “Do you suppose they’re almost ready for takeoff?”
“Just about.”
For some reason Angie wasn’t. She’d come up north for the funeral, but also to say farewell to her childhood home and her teenage daydreams. Instead she felt…fretful.
As if she were leaving something behind, unfinished.
“See ya later then, Ange.”
With a casual wave, Jeremy started to turn away and ridiculous panicky I’m-not-ready-to-leave tears sprang to Angie’s eyes. Before she could stop herself she grabbed hold of the young jackaroo and planted a smacker on his cheek.
So, okay, the kid looked a dozen shades of embarrassed as he sidled away, but she felt better. She even managed a big smile as she called after him, “Look after yourself. And drive carefully.”
Holy cow. She sounded like a mother!
Was that some kind of a sign? Her destiny sneaking up to answer all the unanswered questions of the night?
Smile fading, she let her hand drop away from its cheerful wave as the ute sped off, dust billowing in its wake. She didn’t know if this atypical fragility stemmed from returning home after so long away, the emotional circumstances of her visit, or lack of sleep.
Most likely, all of the above.
With a hitch of one shoulder, she started up the steps of the plane. The engines turned over with a high-pitched whine, and a sudden gust of wind plastered her skirt to her legs and tangled her shoulder-length hair. Pausing to rake the thick tresses back from her face, she felt compelled to take one last look over her shoulder.
Her attention snagged on a distant spurt of movement. Not the rapidly departing Jeremy and not an illusion, either.
A horse and rider loped steadily across the treeless flats, heading straight toward the airstrip.
Three
Angie pressed the palm of one hand flat against her chest. “Steady up there,” she cautioned her heart which had taken off at a wild gallop. Even if it is Tomas, he’s likely just coming to see us off or to deliver a last minute message to his brothers.
Or something.
Rafe called out to her from inside the plane, hurrying her along. Alex, she knew, was already in the pilot’s seat. She waved a stalling hand, her eyes fixed on the approaching rider. No one sat a horse quite like Tomas. The familiarity of that sight and the knowledge that she would get to say goodbye, soothed the ragged rawness of her emotions. Her pulse, however, continued to race as she watched him dismount and start toward her, not in any hurry yet still eating up the ground with his easy, long-legged stride.
No one wore a pair of Wranglers quite like Tomas.
Those work-worn jeans and the dusty roper boots beneath came to a halt at the foot of the stairs. Two steps up, Angie held a height advantage for the first time in her life and she felt a renewed surge of emotion.
This time it was good emotion, as strong and dazzling as the northern sun. Leaning down, she tipped back the tan Akubra that shadowed his face from the bright rays of that morning sun.
“You almost missed us,” she said.
“Damn straight he did.” Rafe, curse his timing, leaned out the aircraft door and broke their second of eye-meet connection. “Nice of you to drop by and see us off, bro’.”
“Wanted to make sure you were leaving, bro’.”
Rafe chuckled and Angie couldn’t suppress a grin at the dry banter. It was so typical, so familiar, so brotherly. Then Tomas’s serious gaze shifted back to hers and froze the amusement on her lips. “And I wanted to see Angie.”
“Don’t keep her too long,” Rafe warned. “Alex is itching to get back to work.”
He left them alone then, she and Tomas and the memory of their last conversation stretching tense and awkward in the ensuing silence. Angie’s nerves twitched impatiently.
“If this is about what I said last night—”
“I’ve been thinking about what you said—”
They both spoke at the same time; both stopped at the same time. Their eyes met and locked and Angie felt a curious breathlessness. “You first,” she managed to murmur. “Go ahead.”
“When you said you would—hypothetically—have this baby, was the offer…exclusive?”
What?
Angie felt her spine snap straight with the implication. “I hope you’re not insinuating I would go around offering to have babies for every Tom, Dick and Harry.”
His disconcerted gaze flicked toward the plane and understanding dawned, startling a cough of laughter from Angie’s mouth. Not every Tom, Dick and Harry, just every…
“Rafe and Alex?”
He shifted his weight from one boot to the other. “Rafe seems to think you’d do this because you owe the family.”
“You discussed me with Rafe?” she asked on a rising note of disbelief.
“He brought it up. He seems to think you’re the perfect choice.”
“And what about you, Tomas? Have you given any thought to your choice?”
“I’ve been thinking about it all night.” His eyes narrowed, deepening the creases at their corners. Making those clear blue irises glint like cool water under a summer sky. Making her heart stutter and restart low in her belly. “Will you help me, Angie?”
And there it was, a simple request spoken so quietly and sincerely that it turned her inside out and upside down. Knowing how much fulfilling this will clause meant to Tomas, how could she refuse? “If I can,” she said, just as softly. “Yes.”
His nostrils flared a fraction. His eyes sparked with…something. “Why?”
Because you need me. Because I love you. “Because I can.”
He looked away, huffed out a breath, said something low and indecipherable and probably not meant for her ears. Slowly his gaze came back to hers. “Still as impetuous as ever?”
Angie shrugged. “Apparently.”
For a long moment they stood in silence, gazes locked, while Angie’s heart screamed at roughly the same decibels as the plane’s engines.
What are you doing? it wailed. What are you saying?
“What now?” she asked, knowing even as she asked what she wanted. Some sign that this was more real than it felt. That she really had just offered to have his baby. “Do you want me to stay?”
“No,” he said quickly. Adamantly. Then he lifted a hand to the brim of his hat, tipping it lower on his brow so his eyes were in shadow. “I’m coming to Sydney next week. I’ll make an appointment with a doctor.”
“You don’t need to…” Her voice trailed off as she remembered what she’d talked about, so glibly, the night before. Then it had been about some hypothetical partner with an unknown sexual history. Now it was about her and Tomas and… She drew a swift breath and lifted her chin. “Yes, we should have the tests, to make sure we’re both healthy.”
He stared at her a moment. “I meant a fertility center.”
“Surely there’s no need for that.”
“There is. For insemination.”
Angie’s mouth fell open. “You’re kidding, right?”
He wasn’t. She could see that in the rigid set of his jaw, in the muscle that flexed and released in his cheek. “It’s got to be artificial.”
“Got to be?” Angie asked calmly, as if she weren’t flailing around trying to get a grasp of something solid. “Because when you asked for my help, when I said yes, I was thinking about doing this the way nature intended.”
“No,” he said tightly. “That’s not going to happen.”
Angie fought an irrational urge to laugh or cry or scream—or perhaps not so irrational. The situation, this conversation, the stilted way they kept tiptoeing arou
nd straight language, was all too unreal. She couldn’t believe how calmly she’d offered to sleep with Tomas, to make love, to try to conceive a baby.
And she couldn’t have imagined how much it would hurt, seeing how fiercely he objected.
“Is the idea of sleeping with me so distasteful that you’d prefer doing it on your own? Because most men—”
“Leave it be, Angie!” He muttered a rough word, one that was fairly pertinent to the topic, Angie thought. “It won’t work.”
“Functionally?” She came down a step so she was right on a level with his face. So she could see the heightened color that traced his cheekbones. See the rigid line of his lips.
Hear the breath he sucked through his teeth. “I meant you and me, any way other than artificial.”
“It’s only sex,” she fired back, her patience so close to snapping she could feel the twitch in her nerves. “Surely you could lie back, close your eyes and think of Kameruka!”
Their gazes clashed, so hot and hostile that neither noticed Rafe’s reemergence from the plane until he cleared his throat. “Sorry to interrupt, folks, but we’ve really got to get moving.”
“Two minutes.” Angie didn’t turn around but she held up a hand. “Just give me two minutes.”
She had no clue what she would do with those precious minutes, whether she would sock Tomas one for his stubbornness or take his face between her hands and kiss him one. Just to prove that she was a woman and he was wrong and that this could work if he’d only give her a chance.
Still simmering she leaned a fraction closer, until she could see into the shadow cast by his broad-brimmed hat and beyond the hostility of his stance to the man beneath. And what she saw there sucker-punched her heart.
He looked so torn, so trapped, so tormented.
Ahh, Tomas…
Like butter under the outback sun, her own animosity melted. “I so wish you hadn’t been forced into this.”
She lifted a hand to touch his face, and for a whisper of time he allowed it. She felt the bristly texture of his unshaven cheek, the warmth of an exhaled breath, the tension that held his whole body straight and erect, and she ached to hold him, to bury her face in that hollow between shoulder and neck, to nuzzle his skin.
And she wanted to kiss him so badly that her lips stung with the wanting, but already she could feel him preparing to pull away. She didn’t give him a chance to get any further. Taking his face firmly between both hands, she ducked beneath that broad-brimmed hat and planted her lips on his.
There, Tomas Carlisle, take that.
With her eyes wide-open she saw the shock in his narrowed blue ones, felt the resistance in his stiff lips and the jolt of reaction—in him, in herself—as her mouth opened softly. Then he wrenched her hands away, turning his face so her lips grazed the corner of his mouth and across his whiskery cheek.
She was left kissing nothing but the morning air, left staring into eyes that blazed with blue fire. “You can’t stand even a kiss?” she asked.
He thumbed the hat back up his forehead, aggravation etched all over his face. “Dammit, Angie, why are you forcing this? If you’re willing to help, then why not my way?”
Because this was her chance—probably her only chance—to have him, and if she could have him and love him and give him the family he needed, then maybe she could also heal his wounded heart. She didn’t know if that was possible, but she had to take a chance. One thing she did know for sure and certain—if she told him how she felt, she wouldn’t see his Wrangler-wrapped backside for swirling black bulldust.
So she rocked back on her heels, folded her arms across her chest, and shrugged. “If I’m going to sacrifice myself to have this baby, I’m not going to be dudded out of all the fun.”
For maybe half a second he went completely still—as if she’d really shocked him—and then he shoved his hat low on his forehead and took a slow step backward. Then another. “This is business, Angie, not fun.”
“And business can’t be fun?”
“Not anymore,” he said tightly. And he turned and strode away.
“Nice work, Ange,” Rafe drawled from behind her.
She didn’t turn around, she was too focused on Tomas’s retreat. His broad shoulders were bunched with tension, his long legs moving as if he couldn’t get far enough away from her quickly enough.
Nice work?
“Only if my job description was ‘lose a good friend,’” she said softly.
Rafe’s hand squeezed her shoulder, but the gesture of support and reassurance didn’t do much to ease the thickness in her chest and throat. “You gave him plenty to think about for the next week, don’t you think?”
She frowned back over her shoulder. “What about next week?”
“We’re meeting in Sydney.”
“We?”
“Alex, myself, Tomas. We’re meeting with Konrads again. About the will.”
Angie’s gaze slid, helplessly, back to the man who now sat still and watchful on his horse. Making sure she did leave? “Are you suggesting he might change his mind?”
“With a little help.”
“What kind of help?” she asked suspiciously.
“Last night I mentioned asking you to help me out. My little brother objected rather strenuously.”
“I object rather strenuously!”
Rafe winked. “Yeah, but he doesn’t need to know that.”
“What are you suggesting?”
“A little competition wouldn’t harm your cause, babe.”
Yes, the Carlisles hated to be outdone, especially by each other. Hadn’t Tomas’s first words this morning been about her offering herself to the wider Carlisle cause? Angie’s gaze shifted back to the motionless rider and her heart skipped a half-beat.
“Between that and what you’ve given him to think about…”
“What’s that?” she asked.
“Close your eyes, lie back, and think of Kameruka.” Rafe grinned and shook his head. “Nice work, Ange.”
“Have either of you considered other methods?” Tomas felt the impact of his brothers’ undivided attention before he looked up from his plate and found them both staring at him, obviously baffled by his out-of-the-blue question.
Around them the late-lunch activity continued in the restaurant of the Sydney Carlisle Grande Hotel. Patrons ate. Waiters waited. Tomas didn’t notice.
He didn’t recall eating his meal. Didn’t recall what they’d discussed while they ate. His attention had been fixed solely on the outcome of their prelunch meeting with Jack Konrads, a week to the day after they’d last met in the Kameruka Downs library.
Long story short: they could fight their father’s will. But then they would have to live with the knowledge that they’d disrespected his last wish.
They had to do this. They had to try.
“Other methods—” Rafe rocked back in his chair “—of eating? Meeting?”
“The baby,” Tomas elucidated. “Artificial conception. I’m thinking of going to a—” Center? Service? Frowning, he searched for the right term. “What do you call those places?”
“A breeding farm?” Rafe suggested.
“A clinic.” Alex put his cutlery down and fixed Tomas with a steely look. The kind he used often in the boardroom to show he meant business. “You don’t have to do this—either of you. That message I got before…”
Vaguely Tomas recalled Alex’s phone blipping just as their meals arrived.
“Susannah has agreed to marry me.”
There was a moment of shocked silence, broken when a waiter arrived to remove their plates. Rafe recovered first and gestured toward the phone. “Are you saying Susannah agreed to marry you by text message?”
“She knows we’re on a short timeline. I told her I wanted to know as soon as she reached a decision.”
Rafe shook his head sadly. “And they say romance is dead.”
For once Tomas was in complete agreement with Rafe. Sure, his eldest brother kep
t a brutal work schedule. Susannah, too, ran her own business. But, still…
“Aren’t you going to congratulate me?” Alex asked.
“Only if you can manage to look slightly happy about it,” Rafe replied at the same time as Tomas said, “You’re only marrying because of the will.”
And in his opinion, that just sucked cane toads. A marriage wasn’t a business transaction. It was about love and partnership and commitment.
Till death us do part.
“Ah, hell.” He didn’t realize he’d been screwing up his napkin until he threw the tightly wadded missile onto the table and rolled the crystal salt shaker. “You don’t have to marry her, Alex.”
“Yes. I do.” Alex folded his napkin in half and half again. Placed it neatly on the table. “That’s the only way I’ll do this.”
“When’s the wedding?” Rafe asked.
“There’s the mandatory thirty-day wait, but as soon as possible. We haven’t decided where.”
“Not at home?” Rafe asked “Mau will want to be there.” By home he meant Kameruka Downs, where they’d all grown up and where Tomas still lived. Their mother, too, in her own place built after his marriage. She rarely left her remote outback home these days. Since intense media scrutiny had led to a breakdown after she’d lost her fourth child to SIDS, she despised the city, crowds, photographers.
“We’re negotiating,” Alex said. “Susannah has family interstate.”
“Not wanting to get personal,” Rafe said carefully. “But does Susannah know she’s expected to, um, produce an heir right off the bat?”
“She knows.” Alex checked his watch, frowned. “I have a meeting to get to, but I wanted you both to know I’ve got this covered.”
Rafe and Tomas exchanged a look.
“You’ve got your part of the deal covered,” Rafe corrected.
“We’ll look after ours,” Tomas added. “One in, all in.” He got to his feet at the same time as his brothers, and offered his hand. “Congratulations, Alex. I hope it works out for you.”
There was a moment, a connection that extended far beyond the firm handshake, the quick slap on the back, even the strong meeting of sky-blue eyes. It was the bond of brothers, the knowledge that a pact made would never be broken. They were all in this together, and, come hell or high water, they would make it work.
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