Gavin let out a mirthless laugh. “You really think that’s going to happen?”
She pulled back and looked at him. “What do you mean?”
“Do you really think Jayce is going to get in his car and come looking for her or is he going to do this from the comfort of his own home?”
“I would think…”
“Jules,” Gavin began, tucking a finger under her chin, “you and I both know that Jayce is a good guy. Hell, sometimes he’s a great guy but he’s lazy as shit. He lets Natalie do everything for him and when she’s not waiting on him, his mother and sisters are. We both saw that in him long before the two of them got married, right?”
She nodded. It had been a bit of a red flag to Julianne and she had mentioned it to Natalie who, in turn, blew it off and claimed she was fine with it because she enjoyed waiting on him.
Clearly not the case anymore.
But then again, could Natalie really put the blame on anyone but herself at this point? After all, she knew this about Jayce going in, so how could she expect it to change?
“Okay, but it’s a little like apples and oranges,” she said logically. “Jayce not helping around the house because he’s lazy is one thing, wanting to find his wife is another.”
“I hope you’re right. I really do. But I have a feeling he’s going to phone this one in too because he’s going to think this is just Natalie being dramatic.”
He was right. And she hated that for Natalie.
Pulling her closer, Gavin kissed her forehead as their legs tangled together.
Now this she loved.
Lazy Sunday mornings in bed. This was her favorite time to be with him – when their day had yet to start and they were both warm and sleepy under the blankets. This morning may have gotten off to an untraditional start, but that didn’t mean they had to miss out on anything.
She wiggled down a little and went back to kissing his chest and sighed happily when Gavin’s hands began to move up and down her back. Occasionally, he’d reach down and grab her ass and squeeze it – and boy-oh-boy did she love that – and soon she was rocking up against him and feeling him get aroused.
Maybe it was wrong to be thinking about her own pleasure when her friend was in crisis, but…she was dealing with ones of her own and the only time she allowed herself to disengage from all the drama in her life was when she was alone with Gavin. He was her rock, her greatest love and her best friend. And right now, she wanted to be one with him and be loved by him more than anything else in the world.
Her hands raked up into his hair as she pulled his head down for a kiss. It was sweet and a little wet and held all kinds of promise. She loved Gavin’s mouth – he did some amazingly wicked and wonderful things to her with it and as he began to shift and move down her body, she felt her own excitement build because she knew he was going to do some of those things to her right now.
Gavin gently rolled her onto her back so he could suckle and knead and play with her breasts and Julianne stretched languidly and let him. The feel of his body on top of her was one she’d never tire of. Her legs lazily came up and curled around him, holding him to her.
Not that he was looking to go anywhere, but she loved the feeling of keeping him close.
As he kissed her and licked her and nipped at her, he murmured how sexy she was, how good she felt and when he moved even lower and put his hands on her thighs, he told her how good she tasted.
Her orgasm was right there and all it took was little more than a minute of his mouth on her for Julianne to explode. She cried out his name, raked her hands through his hair and then tugged it because she wanted more of him – all of him. Now. And Gavin readily gave her what she wanted and as they rocked together in a rhythm they perfected over time, she knew she was the luckiest woman alive.
Or at least the luckiest out of her little squad.
She had found her soulmate and come hell or high water, she was going to marry him and have lazy Sunday mornings for the next fifty-plus years.
They’d get through Natalie’s crisis.
They’d get through the crisis between her mother and Harper.
And she knew – even if they never talked about it – they’d get through the crisis of her wanting to scrap all of their wedding plans and simply elope.
Their breathing was labored as Gavin rolled off of her and tucked her in beside him. “Damn,” he said, kissing her forehead again. “So good. Every time.”
And it was.
Gavin always made sure she came first and always managed to accomplish it a little differently every time so they didn’t get into a rut. That was something they’d talked about a lot – the importance of talking to each other about their sex life so neither got bored. So far, they had a damn good track record. Sure there was an occasional off night, but they were few and far between.
“What are you thinking about?” he asked quietly. “I can tell you’re a little distracted.”
She laughed softly. “Can you blame me? I feel like my mind is going in a million different directions. But…I’m sorry. I shouldn’t let anything distracting be in bed here with us.”
“Jules, it’s okay to have things on your mind even when we’re making love. And really, if you were able to just turn everything off like that, I’d kind of think you had something wrong with you.”
She shifted and pulled back a little. “What do you mean?”
“Baby, no one can clear their minds of everything all the time. I mean…sure, sometimes it’s totally possible and I think we do okay with stuff like that. This morning you just had stuff on your mind.” He shrugged. “I had hoped to distract you, but I can tell you’re not fully…here.”
With a sigh, she rolled onto her back and stared up at the ceiling. Go big or go home, right? It didn’t matter if she sat here and thought about how great and understanding Gavin was. If she knew she could talk to him about anything, why was she holding something back?
“How attached are you to our wedding plans?” she asked tentatively.
“I’m one-hundred-percent attached to marrying you, Jules,” he said fiercely, and she could hear both the defensiveness and vulnerability in his tone.
“And I’m one-hundred-percent attached to marrying you too,” she said, turning her head to look at him. “But that’s not what I’m asking. I’m talking about the wedding – you know, the church, the reception and all the hoopla that goes with it.”
He rolled onto his side and looked at her. “Julianne Burke, I would take you to the courthouse on Monday and marry you if that’s what it took to make you happy. A wedding? It’s nice and fun and it will be a great memory, but it’s not what this…” He motioned between the two of them, “is about. I love you and I want to spend my life with you. And it doesn’t matter if we say that to each other in front of two hundred people or just a judge. I want us to spend our lives together as husband and wife.”
Tears stung her eyes. “I always thought I wanted the big wedding…”
“No one says you can’t have that. I know we still haven’t sat down with your folks, but we will. Soon. I promise. I know you have to go see Natalie today, but if you want, I’ll go and talk to your folks on my own.”
She looked up at him in awe. “You would do that? You’d go…without me…and do that?”
He nodded. “There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you. You should know that. Your battles are my battles and when your battles are making you cry, then I’m more than ready to go and take care of it for you.”
He brushed away her first stray tear.
And the one after that.
And all the ones that followed for the next several minutes.
Ten
“Are you sure she’s breathing? Get a mirror,” Harper whispered.
“She’s breathing,” Kayla said. “She’s just exhausted.”
“Should we let her sleep? I kind of think we need to let her sleep,” Julianne commented.
Slowly, Natalie opened he
r eyes and blinked her friends into focus. “How can a person sleep when there are three people hovering over her and not one of them is whispering?” she grumbled.
“There’s our little ray of sunshine!” Harper said with a big grin as she helped Natalie sit up. “We tried using our inside voices, but it turns out we don’t have those.”
Shockingly, that made Natalie smile. “I can believe that.”
“We have food,” Julianne said. “I stopped at the deli around the corner and got sandwiches and chips and brownies. Kayla has the wine.”
“You can’t eat that stuff,” Natalie said and then yawned. “You’re getting married. Brides aren’t allowed to eat good food. They have to fit into their gowns.”
“I burn off about a pound a day teaching classes,” Julianne said. “Trust me. I’m good. I can eat this stuff and if you’re not careful, I’ll eat your portion too and not even feel bad about it.”
“I’ll arm wrestle you for her share of the brownies,” Kayla said and they all laughed. “Come on. Food’s on the table.”
Frowning, Natalie watched as the three of them walked away and over to the kitchen table. That was it? They weren’t going to hug her? Let her cry? Listen to how upset she was?
Kicking the blanket aside, she stood up and glared at them.
“Um…excuse me,” she snapped and was pleased when they all stopped what they were doing to look at her. “In case no one noticed, I’m kind of in crisis mode here!”
“We know,” Julianne replied. “That’s why we’re here.”
“With food,” Harper added.
“That’s kind of how this works,” Kayla said.
Was it? Honestly, Natalie had no idea. She’d never done…this…before. She’d never had her life fall apart to the point where she essentially ran away from home. But if this was what she was supposed to do then…okay. With a shrug, she walked over to the table and sat down. The girls all fussed around her – setting up food, pouring wine. When they all sat down, they looked at her.
It was a little unnerving.
Was she supposed to talk now?
“Before you start,” Kayla said, “you should know that I called Julianne this morning and told her everything that you said to me. Maybe it wasn’t my place, but I thought she should know.”
“Oh…well…”
“And then I called Harper,” Julianne admitted. “And…you know…told her everything.”
“Okay…”
“I suggested the brownies,” Harper said with a smile.
Natalie burst into tears.
Julianne and Kayla both looked at Harper. “What? What did I do? I was trying to make her smile!”
“And yet…she’s crying right now,” Julianne pointed out. “Good job.” Then she walked around the table and bent down to hug her crying friend. “It’s okay, Nat. Let it out. We’re not trying to make light of your situation; I swear.”
Natalie shook her head and gently pushed Julianne away. “I’m just…I don’t know…” She looked up at the three of them sadly. “I don’t even know what I’m trying to say!”
And she started crying again.
And for a few minutes, they let her.
“Okay, I think you need something to eat,” Kayla finally said. “You’re going to get dehydrated if you keep crying like that and it’s not good for you.” She pushed a plate with a sandwich and chips toward her. “Trust me. Food helps.”
Natalie took several deep breaths and forced herself to focus on the food in front of her. Her stomach growled loudly and she knew she needed to eat. When she looked up, Kayla, Julianne and Harper were all staring at her. Clearly no one was going to eat until she took her first bite so…
And sure enough, as soon as she started to chew, they all picked up their sandwiches and started to eat.
Surprisingly, it tasted good – she didn’t think she’d be able to appreciate anything right now because, for the most part, she felt numb. She just assumed her taste buds would be too.
“Where’s your phone?” Julianne asked after a few silent bites.
“In my purse,” Natalie replied. “But it’s turned off.”
“I figured that,” Julianne replied as she stood. Then she walked over to where Natalie had dropped her bags and pulled out her cell phone. Back at the table, she turned it on.
“What are you doing?” Natalie cried.
Julianne gave her a patient smile. “We need to know if Jayce tried to call or text you or…anything. You don’t have to answer any of those things, but I think we need to know what’s going on.”
Beside her, Julianne’s phone buzzed with an incoming text. She swiped the screen, read the message and smiled. Looking back up at Natalie, she said, “Your husband just showed up at my house. Gavin’s talking to him.”
“He is?” she squeaked. “What is he saying?”
“I don’t know yet. All Gavin said was that Jayce was there so…we have to wait.”
And dammit, she wanted to know if he’d called or texted her but was too embarrassed to ask. After all, when a woman leaves her husband in the middle of the night, wakes up a friend for a place to stay and then makes all of her other friends come and console her, she shouldn’t feel so desperate for any word from the rat bastard.
Should she?
“You have six missed calls and…twelve texts from him,” Julianne said mildly. “I haven’t read any of them. All I can see are the notifications and I’m assuming they’re from him.”
Anxiously, Natalie looked at each of them. “What am I supposed to do? Am I supposed to read them?” She paused. “And did he…did he leave any messages?”
Julianne looked down at the phone again and nodded. “Six of them.”
Oh boy.
“If you want, you can go inside to my room and listen to them in private,” Kayla suggested. “But after you eat. I think you’re going to need a little sustenance in your belly for this.”
She nodded in agreement and picked up her sandwich again. Smiling, she realized that Julianne had ordered her favorite – turkey and Swiss with bacon, lettuce, tomato and mayonnaise. It was her “cheat” sandwich – the kind she only allowed herself when she didn’t have to worry about fitting into a specific dress or outfit. It was so good and exactly what she needed right now.
Looking around the table, she reached for the bottle of wine. It seemed an odd combination but for right now, it worked. She poured herself a glass – a large glass – and took an equally large sip.
“Pace yourself,” Harper said, taking the glass from her hand. “You haven’t eaten nearly enough to justify that yet.”
Natalie was about to pick up her sandwich when she paused. “So everyone knows why I’m here,” she began and looked up at them. “Was I wrong to leave? Am I overreacting?”
“Nat, you’re the only one who can answer that,” Julianne said. “If you were upset to the point that you packed a bag, then I don’t think you were wrong. You’re normally very even-tempered. But you have to ask yourself what you hope to accomplish by doing this. Are you looking to just make Jayce fall in line or are you wanting to go to therapy…?”
“Or…?” Natalie prompted, because she knew there was more.
“Or…are you ready to walk away from your marriage?” Julianne asked quietly.
“You don’t have to have the answer to that right now,” Kayla quickly interjected. “It’s okay if you don’t know.”
“But I should know,” Natalie argued. “I should know what it is I want, otherwise…what am I fighting for?” She looked at all of them. “Right?”
“You should take some time, Nat,” Kayla repeated. “You don’t want to make a rash decision that you’ll end up regretting.”
And she knew Kayla was speaking from experience.
They went back to eating and they encouraged Natalie to talk about how she was feeling and what she was thinking. While it felt good to get it all off of her chest, she was dying to know what Jayce’s response was to findi
ng her gone.
What did his texts say?
What did his voicemails say?
Before she knew it, her sandwich was finished, her chips were gone and her wine glass was empty.
Kayla took Natalie’s plate away and put a brownie in front of her. “Good girl. Now, finish that and then you can have your phone. If you want it.”
Seemed fair, she thought and forced herself not to dive across the table to grab it. She didn’t – clearly her friends were a little more familiar with the rules and mandates of how to help a friend through a breakup – and instead she wolfed down her brownie.
Harper poured her a fresh glass of wine.
Julianne handed her the phone.
And Kayla stood by the bedroom door.
“Take all the time you need and holler if you need us.”
It took Natalie a solid five minutes before she could force herself to click on her voicemail app to listen to Jayce’s first message.
“Natalie! Where are you? What the hell’s going on? Call me!”
Delete.
“Come on, Nat. What is the deal with this? Is this some sort of game? Where the hell are you?”
Delete.
Loud sigh. “Natalie, this is ridiculous and childish. Answer your damn phone! Come on now! I’m not kidding!”
Delete.
“Okay, I get it. You’re upset.” He sighed. “Just…come home and we’ll talk, okay? Please?”
Delete.
“Fuck this. It’s not like you would have gone far. I’m not wasting my whole day like this. You’re probably at Julianne’s and I’m on my way.”
Delete.
She sat on the corner of Kayla’s bed trembling.
Not once did he ask if she was okay.
Every message held a varying degree of anger.
And it was like listening to a stranger.
She took a deep breath and let it out slowly before reading the texts. Tears rolled down her face as she scrolled and saw that they were basically the same messages she’d just listened to.
There were no hearts or smiley faces like they usually sent to each other.
The Bridal Squad Page 18