by Shayna Ryan
Billy’s breath caught in his throat when her words reached his ears. “But you’re with Marty.” His voice was husky and low, and his throat tight.
“I know,” she replied softly, as she grasped his face in her hands and drew him to her with a tender look.
He knew he shouldn’t do it, but the years of yearning pent up inside him drowned out his common sense. He met her lips greedily, but then reigned in his passion to allow her to set the pace of their kiss.
It was gentle, and sweet, and everything he had dreamed of for most of his life. He rested one hand on the small of her back and pulled her closer yet, so she was flush against him. His free hand found her hair tie and released her waves of auburn hair before coming to rest on her upper back. She moaned softly with pleasure against him as her hands slipped under his shirt and caressed his bare back. His tensed with need as she ran her fingernails softly over his skin.
There was nothing in that moment but the two of them lost in their kiss. A nearby horse kicked loudly against its stall, pulling Billy back to reality. Reluctantly, he broke away from her.
“We can’t,” he whispered. It was the hardest thing he’d ever had to do, breaking that kiss.
Melanie looked up at him with sad eyes as he reached up and stroked a strand of her soft hair away from her face.
“I know,” she whispered back as she leaned in to kiss him again.
He released her, and stepped back, his breathing ragged. “No, Melanie, we can’t! You’re with Marty!”
She nodded sadly as tears filled her eyes. “I am. And now you’re here, and I don’t know what to do!”
Her words angered him. It was simple in his mind. “Here’s an idea…either break up with Marty, and be with me, or stay with Marty, and this never happens again.”
Melanie began sobbing as she leaned against her horse for comfort. “I’m sorry,” she wailed. “I’m just so confused. Marty is great, but you… I’ve always wanted you, and here you are!”
Guilt twisted Billy’s insides into a knot. “I’m going to forget this ever happened, and I suggest you do the same. If things ever end between you and Marty, I want to hear about it, but until then, we can’t do this.” His chest heaved as he tried to bring his emotions under control. He wanted her, more than ever, but not like this. Nothing would make him happier than to have her, but it was Melanie, not some random girl from the bar. If he was going to have her, she needed to be his, and only his. He wouldn’t share her with another man. She meant so much more to him than stolen kisses in the barn, in the middle of the night. He wouldn’t degrade her, or himself, like that again.
“I love you, Melanie,” he told her softly. “I have forever, ever since we were kids. But I won’t be with you like this. We both deserve better! If things change in your life, you let me know. Until then, we’re just friends, okay?”
She didn’t answer him but instead cried harder. He took a step towards her, with the intentions of holding her close to comfort her, but then stopped. That wouldn’t help anything. If he held her close again, he didn’t think he could maintain his own self-control.
“I have to go. I’m going to try to forget this whole thing, and I suggest you do the same.” The sounds of her sobbing followed him out of the barn.
He broke into a run, and as he pushed himself to go as hard and as fast as he could on the way back to the cabin, he discovered that punishing his body did nothing to diminish the pain in his heart.
-5-
Sleep eluded him for the rest of the night. He flipped back and forth between being furious with himself for allowing the kiss to take place to begin with, and berating himself for not taking it further, just that once, so that he would have at least one intimate night with the woman of his dreams. The self-loathing consumed him.
Eventually, thoughts of Cass crept into his mind. What would she think if she found out about this? They weren’t officially an item, so he didn’t feel like he needed to be loyal to her at this point, but he knew she would be crushed to discover he had kissed her sister. He didn’t want to hurt her, or Melanie.
By the time he rolled up to the barn at 8:00 to begin work for the day, he had come to a decision. The kiss he shared with Melanie had been glorious, but he was closing the door on all of that. He couldn’t allow himself to be consumed by her anymore; he couldn’t take the stress of waiting to discover if she would leave Marty or not. He would take Cass out Friday night as planned, and see what developed from there.
He tried to act natural as he approached Marty, who was waiting for him in front of the barn.
“So, we’re branding today,” he told Billy.
Billy relaxed as he noticed no animosity in the manager’s voice. He clearly didn’t know about the kiss that he had shared with Melanie.
“All right, let’s go.” They rode one of the Gators over to the cattle barn, and it was a busy morning as they branded the calves. Try as he might to find a reason not to like Marty, Billy found that he did. Guilt burned in his gut. One night stands were one thing, but sneaking around with another guy’s girl was another entirely, and that wasn’t him. He took solace in the fact that it would never happen again.
They broke for lunch, and his heart hammered faster in his chest when he spied Melanie waiting for Marty, sitting on his truck bed flap. Her short, frayed, cut off denim shorts showed off her legs beautifully.
“Hey, sweetheart,” Marty waved to her as he climbed out of the Gator. Billy swallowed hard as he tried to act casual.
“Hey, Melanie,” he called, giving her a stiff wave. He didn’t wait to see if she replied, but instead headed right for his truck. He tried not to look at the pair as he pulled away from the barn.
Back at his cabin, he threw off his shirt and flopped onto his bed with a sigh. He thought about leaving the Haffner ranch. What was he staying for, anyway? Melanie wasn’t available, and now things were awkward between them.
A knock at that door interrupted his thoughts. He opened the door, expecting it to be one of the ranch hands, or maybe Cass, and came face to face with Mr. Haffner.
“Hello, Sir. Please some in.” He put a smile on his face but inside he was a nervous wreck. He was suddenly convinced that he somehow knew about his secret embraces with Melanie the night before.
“Billy, how’re you finding the place?” he asked as he stepped inside and removed his cowboy hat.
“Oh, it’s great. I love it.”
“Good, good, but that’s not why I’m here today.” Billy gestured to the little kitchen table and Mr. Haffner took a seat. “I came to talk to you about Cass.”
“Cass?” Blood pounded in his ears as he waited for his employer to forbid him from taking his daughter out.
“I hear my little Cass has caught your eye, and you hers.” Billy nodded, unsure of how to respond. “A lot of men have chased my Cassandra these last few years, and I suspect she’s chased a few of them herself. There’s been a lot of broken hearts, both ways, with all of that.” He paused, and looked Billy square in the eye. “I just want to be sure you’re serious about her, and this isn’t just fun for you. My Cass doesn’t need any more men chasing her for the wrong reasons. You plan to do right by her?”
Billy nodded again, and finally found his voice. “I do, Sir.”
“I thought as much,” Mr. Haffner tipped his chair back and rested his hands behind his head as he studied Billy. “My Margaret was delighted to hear about your upcoming date, as was I, but I wanted to swing by and make sure we were square on things.”
Billy tried not to squirm under his scrutiny. This man had dropped by to make sure he had the best intentions towards his younger daughter, and it would have made him nervous any day, even if he hadn’t just shared a stolen kiss with his older one.
“We are. Cass is a great girl; I’ll be nothing but respectful towards her, Sir.”
“I’m delighted to hear that, and that’s exactly what I expect from you.” Mr. Haffner rose to leave, and Billy stood as well. “I
hope things work out for you two; she’s a great gal, and she needs a good man to pull her back a bit. Perhaps you’ll be that man; we’ll see. Well, I’ve gotta get home for lunch, but it was good speaking to you, Billy. I assume we’ll see you up at the main house, to pick up Cass for your date?”
“Of course.” It hadn’t crossed his mind, but Mr. Haffner clearly expected him to collect his daughter for their date in the proper fashion, so that’s what he would do.
Mr. Haffner left, and Billy half-heartedly picked at a cold cut sandwich. He was exhausted, both physically and mentally, and food was the last thing on his mind. He had another busy afternoon of work ahead of him, so he forced himself to eat.
On his ride back to the barn, he spied Cass out in the meadows, cantering along on a roan horse. She was without her hat today, and even from a distance he could see her pale blonde hair flowing behind her in the wind. Seeing her made him wish he could talk to her again, and soon. The awkwardness of their initial run-ins had been erased by the pleasant lunch they shared the day before. He found himself thinking Friday night couldn’t come fast enough. He couldn’t wait to spend more time with Cass again.
Melanie was not with Marty when he returned to the barn, and he was relieved about that. He didn’t expect to be able to avoid her forever, but he thought at least a few days distance in between them would be good. It was his hope that she wasn’t furious with him for turning her down, but he was steadfast in his decision to distance himself from her unless she ended it with Marty.
Billy was relieved when 5:00 finally rolled around. He had been up two straight days with little sleep, and all he wanted to do was go home and sleep straight through until morning. When he arrived back at the cabin, Ramiro was sitting on his front steps, waiting for him, with a six pack by his side.
“Don’t tell me it’s that she-devil’s getting to you already?” he asked with a grin when he saw Billy’s worn-out face.
“No, it’s not Cass,” Billy replied as he joined his new friend on the steps and cracked open a beer.
“I heard you’re taking her out this weekend.”
“Does everybody know about that, already?” Billy asked crossly.
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you, man. That one’s trouble!”
Billy bit back the rude reply that rose to his lips and tried to tactfully tell Ramiro to mind his own business. “She seems like a nice girl, and I’ve got the Haffner’s approval to take her out, so I guess whatever happens next is just between Cass and me.”
Ramiro shrugged. “It’s your funeral, man. But the guys have already started placing bets on which sister you end up with.”
Billy rested his head in his hands. “You guys are betting on me? And why is Melanie part of it?”
“I told you, man,” Ramiro replied with a good-natured chuckle, “word has it Marty’s got a lot to be worried about, with you back on the ranch.”
Billy closed his eyes and tried to block the sensation of Melanie’s slim frame against his from his mind. “Marty’s got nothing to worry about! He can keep Melanie; the only Haffner girl I’m interested in is Cass.”
“If you say so.” Ramiro took a long swallow of his beer and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “You seem a bit touchy, for a guy who’s got this all figured out.”
“I’m just tired,” Billy replied curtly. “It’s been a big week for me, returning here and all. In fact, if you’ll excuse me, I need to get in and get to bed.”
“But it’s not even six at night!”
“Thanks for the beer, and I’d love to do this another time, but I gotta get to bed.” Billy went into the house, leaving his baffled friend alone on his front steps. He closed the door and leaned against it for a moment with his eyes closed. Exhaustion was quickly overcoming him. He would take a quick shower and head straight to bed, and maybe he’d feel better in the morning.
His shower was piping hot, and it felt luxurious to wash the day’s work away. He stepped out and dried off, then hung the towel back on the rack. Naked, he wandered into his little kitchen to grab a quick bite before he hit the sack.
He pawed through his freezer, looking for something he could make and eat quickly.
“I could make you another sandwich,” Cass offered from his bed.
“Cass! What are you doing in here?” He wasn’t unhappy to see her, he was just surprised she had let herself in, unannounced. Suddenly, he realized he was standing there naked, and he dashed to the bathroom and threw the towel around his waist.
“I was enjoying the view,” she smirked when he returned.
“Haven’t you heard of knocking, woman?” he shot back with devilish grin. Now that her flirty banter wasn’t taking him by surprise, he found himself enjoying it.
“I did, but you didn’t answer, so I stuck my head in, and heard you in the shower. I figured I’d wait for you. I didn’t think you’d mind.”
“No, but I just wish you’d announced that you were here, so I wouldn’t have just waltzed out here with nothing on.”
“If I give you a gander at me naked, will that even things up?” she asked with mock innocence.
Billy just shook his head and chuckled as he collected some clean clothes to get dressed. “I’m going to go throw these on in the bathroom. I expect you to still be fully dressed when I return.”
“You’re no fun!” she called to him as he closed his bathroom door.
He smiled to himself as he hurriedly put on his clothes. He was still exhausted, but bedtime could wait an hour or two. It wouldn’t kill him to stay up and visit with Cass a bit.
Things banged in the kitchen, and he stuck his head out cautiously. Cass was busy rooting around the cupboards and she pulled out pots and pans as she found what she needed.
“What are you doing?” he asked her, as he openly eyed her firm behind since it was up in the air as she dug through the lower cupboards.
“Making dinner, silly.”
“C’mon, Cass, you don’t have to do that for me.” He walked towards her and she straightened up and turned to face him with her back against the counter.
“I want to,” she replied quietly.
He stopped just short of touching her, so they were face to face, and very close. Desire thrummed through him as he caught the scent of her perfume, a light, floral fragrance. She was wearing a long sleeved cotton V-neck shirt, and a clean pair of jeans. He could tell she had put on makeup, and it was obvious that she had gone home to clean up in between her day on the ranch and coming to see him.
The air felt charged around them as they stood there, just staring at each other. Billy wondered for a moment why he had allowed himself to get so tangled up in the idea of Melanie, when this gorgeous woman right in front of him wanted to be with him. She was so different from her sister, yet still wonderful. Where Melanie was calm and soft, Cass was energetic and vivacious. Melanie was predictable while her sister was a wild card. They were worlds apart, but why had he been so afraid of that? Now that Cass had toned down her overly aggressive come-ons, he found himself far more open to the idea of them being together.
“I like this. You, here with me, I mean,” he told her frankly. He took in every little detail of her face as she looked at him, doing the same thing. He moved a hair closer, and his heart beat sped up as he neared her. “The thing you need to know about me, Cass, is that I prefer to chase my women, rather than have them chase me.”
“Is that a fact?” she asked breathlessly, and she leaned forward slightly as well.
The air grew thick with the desire between them as Billy leaned in that extra little bit and she moved to meet him. Just as their lips touched, a knock sounded at the door.
Billy pulled back and ran a hand through his hair in frustration. “Hold that thought, okay?” Cass beamed at him and nodded.
As he approached the door, he wondered who it would be, and prayed it wasn’t Mr. Haffner again. It would be bad timing, to say the least, if he chose this moment to drop by again. When
he opened the door, he wished it had been Mr. Haffner knocking. It was Melanie instead.
“Can we talk for a minute?” she asked him quietly.
Billy shook his head and tried to keep the door closed so that she wouldn’t see her sister in his kitchen. “It’s not really a good time for me right now, Melanie.”
“But we need to talk about last night.”
“There’s really nothing to talk about,” he told her, keeping his voice low so Cass wouldn’t overhear them. The words sounded good, but just seeing her again brought the memory of their kiss back to life. He mentally berated himself for letting his mind go there again. He was done with Melanie; it was already decided. Maybe things would be different if she didn’t have a boyfriend, but she did, so that was that.
“Hey, sis,” Cass pulled the door wide open and greeted her sister. Melanie’s eyes grew wide and Billy thought he saw tears beginning to form in them. “What are you doing here?”
“Cass,” Melanie said flatly, in a defeated tone. “There you are. Mom’s looking for you.”
Cass rolled her eyes dramatically. “Can’t it wait?”
“No, I don’t think so.”
Cass moved past Billy and gave him a quick peck on the cheek as she left. “We still on for Friday?”
“You bet.”
“Good. Can you give me a ride home?” she asked her sister. “I walked here.”
“Sure.” The two sisters left Billy’s cabin, and he watched them as they went. Cass threw him a wink over her shoulder, and he winked back at her, feeling good about what was developing between them. Melanie stared at him as she climbed into her truck, and the look of sorrow and pain on her face nearly broke his heart, until he reminded himself he had nothing to feel guilty about. What right did she have to be disappointed in him? She was the one with a serious significant other, not him.
-6-
Friday finally arrived. Billy hadn’t seen Cass, or Melanie, in the days since their impromptu visits to his cabin. He was starting to wonder if Cass had changed her mind about their date. By the end of the work day he was debating what to do, as he had not heard from her at all.