No Wasted Tears

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No Wasted Tears Page 14

by Sylvia D. Carter


  From a pew in the back of the church, she watched Pastor Wheeler’s eyes jolt between the congregation and Destiny Harper. She got the name from a very informative woman sitting next to her with nothing better to do than gossip. Fury coursed through her blood, making her hands shake and her pulse thud. How dare he pay that much attention to her with a church full of congregants? How dare he, especially with her in the audience? Although, he didn’t know she was present. She’d been planning their reunion for over six months. Her body vibrated with anger as she remembered the way he’d looked at Destiny from the pulpit. His gaze had reflected such tenderness, making it glaringly obvious that he cared deeply about Destiny Harper. Her eyes flashed with heat. In her mind she hissed, You Mr. Wheeler are, annoying the hell out of me. She was jealous. She hated admitting it, but she was positively vibrating with it. She held herself, rocking backward and forward in her seat, her hands were clenching and unclenching wanting to hit something.

  Destiny, she learned was running from her past, just the memory of her informant’s sob story about her life made her want to roll her eyes. What kind of woman let a man walk all over her? She’d feigned sympathy when she listened to the woman give her the story, all the while wanting to laugh at the stupidity of the woman. If she had been in Destiny’s shoes, Stanley Womack, corporate executive or not, would have hit her once and then she would have killed him. Shelton, her initial informant, had gotten her some details of her life, but what she really appreciated was getting Stanley’s information.

  She’d only struck up this friendship to find out more about Destiny. She must have had some issues because this young lady had met her in a domestic violence class. Within a few minutes, she’d pegged Destiny as dull and totally useless to Adam as a pastor—that was until she’d seen the way he had looked at her during service. After that, getting to know as much as she could about her had been less about curiosity and more about keeping her enemy close.

  Soon she’d have Adam Wheeler where he should have been years ago—in her bed. But this attraction he had with this woman annoyed her as much as the realization that if she did not do something soon she’d lose him again. Adam needed a real woman, not a weak fool who ran from the first signs of trouble. He needed someone like her. It was time to take Miss Goodie-two-shoes out of the equation. A smile lifted the corner of her mouth.

  Reaching into her purse, she pulled out her phone and quickly left the church. She found the contact number for Womack Corporation and hit “talk.”

  Chapter 19

  The loud ringing of the telephone woke Cynthia up from her sleep. She’d left the maternity ward of the hospital hours ago because the twins and Taylor had started getting sleepy, and she knew they had to go to school the next day. She and Sara came home to put all three children to sleep. Taylor had a fit because she didn’t want to leave without seeing her brother. But Sara promised that on the next day she would take her first thing.

  Cynthia, finally shaking off her daze, picked up the receiver.

  “He looks just like Richard.”

  Cynthia clenched her fist and raised it in the air, shouting, “Yes!”

  Sara heard Cynthia talking loudly and sounding excited. She rushed from her room, asking, “So she had the baby?”

  “A healthy baby boy, seven pounds and twenty-two inches long. She delivered at three thirty-six this morning. Baby and momma are resting fine.”

  She handed Sara the phone; they talked for a few minutes, and then she hung up.

  Walking into the living room, Cynthia turned to Sara. “I’m so excited for Tina. There’s nothing like being a mother.” She placed her hands on her stomach.

  “You want another baby, don’t you? Can’t say I blame you. Every woman wants a chance to experience motherhood. It’s a gift from God.”

  Cynthia realized she expressed herself without knowing it. Sara had never given birth. “I’m sorry, Sara. I didn’t mean to make you sad.”

  “Child, I’m not sad. The best thing that ever happened to me was Destiny. I loved her from the day she was born like she was my own. I promised my sister I’d watch over her little girl, and I did. Sometimes I wished she didn’t have to go through so much pain. But I know it’s all about to change. Pastor Wheeler loves my baby, and I believe in my heart she loves him. They just got to get through all of the mess in their past in order to see the blessing in their futures together. They’ll be good for each other.”

  “I can say with confidence that you’ve been a blessing to me and the twins as well. They love you like you were their grandmother.”

  “But I’m not. Child, you got to do right by them babies. They need to know their father, and they need to know their grandparents,” she said, looking sternly at Cynthia. Sara walked over to the sofa and joined her hands with Cynthia. “I know you love the Lord, and I know you know that nothing happens in the life of a believer that God doesn’t know about. It wasn’t an accident that you had those babies. It was God’s providential will. God knew.” Laughing and patting Cynthia’s hand, she said, “He knows his children, doesn’t he?”

  “If that’s the case, and I know that it is, I sure wish he’d let me know so that I could be prepared for what was going to happen next in my life,” Cynthia said, shaking her head. “Sometimes I think God has an awesome sense of humor. He must laugh at us making a big to do about something he already has worked out.” Wiping the tears, she reached for a tissue on the table.

  Standing, Sara looked at Cynthia.

  “I’m sleepy, and in the morning, there will be three little people looking for me to cook breakfast, so I’m going to sleep. Will you do me a favor? Put that letter on the table by the door in Destiny’s bedroom; somewhere she will be able to see it. I thought she’d be here sooner, but since she isn’t, she can get it when she gets in.” And with that, Sara walked back to her room.

  Cynthia continued to sit on the sofa for a few more minutes. She decided to pray before going back to bed. She got on her knees in front of the sofa. “Father God, I know everything that you do is perfect and good. I need your divine guidance to give me direction. I love you, Lord, and I trust you with every area of my life. Instruct me, God, on what you want me to do. I know you respond to our prayers in a variety of ways. You have used signs and your Word to teach me how to trust you more. God, let your will be done in my life and my sons’ lives. In Jesus’s name, amen.”

  With that, Cynthia began to feel a sense of peace. She got up to go to bed. Going to retrieve the letter for Destiny, she put it on her pillow, closed the door, went to her room, and fell asleep almost before her head hit the pillow.

  Chapter 20

  Destiny opened the door to her room at exactly five o’clock in the morning. She was tired, but she was happy for Tina and Richard. It felt amazing to have held her god-son. Throwing her handbag in the chair that sat by the bay window in her room, she caught glimpses of a new day peeking through the curtains. Turning around to prepare for bed, she saw an envelope lying on her pillow. Walking over to pick it up, she looked for a return address, curious because all she saw was her name written across the front. She sat down on the bed, tore open the envelope, and began to read.

  Dearest Destiny, my precious little girl,

  This is my last expression of love that I have for you. You see, I’m desperate for you to know me, your mother. If you are reading this letter, then it’s safe for me to say that you’re at least twenty-six. Happy birthday, my darling. I wish I were there to see you all grown up.

  Destiny hadn’t even thought about it with all of the excitement. Her birthday was today. She was twenty-six years old. She never thought about birthdays. Hers were always uneventful and had always come and gone quietly. But this year, her mother had remembered, and it brought sad, happy tears to her eyes.

  More than anything, I wish I could be there with you to celebrate your day, but our God had a plan for your life, just as he had one for mine. I loved you from the moment you were conceived. Your f
ather and I were desperately in love with each other. We met, fell in love, and not long after, we were married. It was a magical summer romance. So much had happened in such a short period of time, but for us, it was the most wonderful time of our lives. One day we were a couple of foolishly in-love young adults and the next, we were husband and wife.

  I love you so much, darling. It was my decision to keep our relationship from Sara. You see, your father left me to go home shortly after we were married. It was his intention to come back for me. We were going to share our marriage with Sara. I planned a beautiful dinner, but he never returned.

  Destiny couldn’t believe what she was reading. It seemed that her mother’s life had been as lonely and hurtful as hers. She fingered the pale yellow paper, softened by age. The envelope appeared to be aged as well with no date, just the signature of her mother. There was love that still radiated from the paper, despite the years that had obviously passed since it was written. She continued to read.

  It wasn’t until weeks later that he informed me of the death of, first, his mother, then his brother and sister-in-law, who were killed in a terrible accident. They had one beautiful boy, Shawn, and were expecting a daughter. Tina was the name they had chosen. She was kept alive even though her mom was in a coma.

  The paper slipped from Destiny’s hands. She couldn’t believe the words she had just read. There was no way that this could be a coincidence. Could there really be another Tina and Shawn? Her senses were going haywire. Her hands began to tremble uncontrollably. She found herself rocking back and forth on the bed. The tears were flowing like a dam that had been breached. Reaching down, she picked up the letter. The words were a blur because of the tears in her eyes.

  I know you’re wondering why you were never told about them being your first cousins. Please forgive me. It was my choice. Your father wanted to tell Sara. You see, I loved Sara so much, and she had no one else but me. I couldn’t let her lose you. I asked your father not to take you from her. So that’s why you’re with her and not him.

  It was at this time that Destiny noticed the handwriting. The words seemed to be strung together, frantically, with barely a space between, as if the letter had been written in one furious burst of energy. Destiny wondered when her mother wrote this letter. Had it been right before her delivery, or had it been written while she was at the hospital? She had questions that only her mother knew the answer to, or maybe Sara could fill in the blanks of this mysterious letter that seemed to be filling in the gaps if her life. Looking back at the paper in her hand, she continued.

  Destiny, life is laughter and pain; it is hope and despair; it is truth, and it is lies, beautiful and ugly all at the same time. And through it all, I want you to choose your own path, be what you want to be, do what you want to do. Because whatever you choose, you’ll still be my beautiful, precious child, and I will love you always. It is my promise to you this day, on your birthday that your life will change forever. Your father has a special birthday gift for you. He loves you, Destiny. He promised me that he would always be close to you and that he’d never be far away. He never broke a promise to me, so I know he will do as he promised. Remember, I’ll always be there to cheer you on, whatever road you may choose to walk. When he comes to you, love him just as I did. Willie Brown is a good man, and I’m sure he’s been a great friend, but he’ll also be a great father to you.

  May life be kind to you, Destiny, and may the sun smile on you. May you always find love and care, and that you give it in double measure. You will always be my Destiny.

  I love you,

  Mom

  Destiny hastily refolded the letter into thirds and tucked it back into the envelope. She noticed her hand shaking as she hurriedly smoothed the envelope over the paper. Destiny had grown up believing that her mother was unwed and that she was an accident. She had been wrong about her mother and father. They had been very much in love, and they both loved her. Someone in deep emotional pain had written this letter. Someone who had been literally sick with love for her baby and her husband had written it.

  Sara would talk willingly enough about her mother’s first dates or what life used to be like in Kingstree before the interstate highway arrived. Once in a while, Sara would reminisce about the early days of her life, and Destiny would get a brief, precious glimpse of her mother as a baby or young girl. But questions about Destiny’s father were met with awkward silence. The past, she learned, meant pain. And the last thing Destiny wanted was to cause her auntie any more heartbreak.

  The only safe memories, the only ones Destiny could ask about and get a smile from, were the stories of Sara and Margret’s childhood in Kingstree. She’d told her of her parents’ courtship but never the mention of a marriage. Her mother’s story had made a powerful impact on Destiny, who grew up believing that love would eventually lead to a broken heart. She’d made her way unhappily through high school, where being smart disqualified her from popularity and her frizzy brown hair, acne-prone skin, and only reinforced her brainy image. Destiny was forced to believe that fairy tales she had read about rarely ever happened in real life.

  It wasn’t until college that she met her best friend, Tina Brown. She was someone not as socially awkward but just as grade obsessed as she was. Tina was the youngest child of two. Her Uncle Willie had raised her. Destiny now knew that was her father. It was odd because he had always been there for her. Every major event in her life during and after college, he had been around. He saw her transformation from an awkward bookworm into a polished woman, her unruly hair then smoothed from a perm.

  As Destiny thought about Willie, she realized that Sara and he were one of the few constants in her life. Friends who didn’t understand her nonstop work schedule had drifted away—all accept Tina. Her social life outside the office was nonexistent because Stanley had wanted it that way. But Willie had been around even then. Never did a month go by that she didn’t see him. He was always in town for a conference or a meeting, but he always stopped in to check on her. They had even had lunch on several occasions. Uncle Willie, her father, was the only person who understood her ambition. Not only did he understand it, but he encouraged it. Willie never seemed to approve of Stanley; he always told her she could do better, and she now knew he was right. It was often that his hands carefully brushed the tears from her cheeks when she was sad or disappointed. She knew, even through the pain and grief, that she was loved and that she was safe. Yes, he had kept his promise to her mother.

  Lying back down on her pillow, Destiny clutched the letter close to her heart. She had a family, a family that was close. She found herself drifting off to sleep with the sweetest thoughts she’d ever had in her twenty-six years of life.

  Chapter 21

  Lying in bed, Stanley couldn’t keep the thoughts of Destiny at bay. He was getting anxious needing to get to Seattle. After receiving a phone call a week ago from some woman, he knew exactly where she was then with the help of his own private investigator it had been easy. She had to know he would find her. His private investigator had told him she was currently seeing someone. But he seemed to think that they were only friends for now. Seven months ago he was furious when he got home to find her gone. She belonged to him and he’d convince her to come back with him. He had been her rescuer and he’d make her think she owed him that much. After all when she needed a job he offered her one. It had been easy to persuade her to move in with him, giving her a maid. And he was the perfect playmate. He would have never hit her if she would have listened to him, but she always wanted to do things her way.

  Marriage was something that was eventually going to happen. After his best friend Curtis married his old girlfriend, he had decided to go ahead and marry Destiny. But she was always going on and on about how he’d hit her and harassed her for no reason. So, she left. Now his like for her was replaced with all of the hate he had for Curtis. She would pay for walking out on him. Leaving him meant she never loved him. He would never forgive her for that. She woul
d pay and suffer for the pain she had put him through. His need to find her grew stronger every day and he sometimes found it hard to concentrate on the things that were going on around him. Even his current girlfriend was driving him crazy, always talking about how much she loved him. Every night she wanted to go out and show everyone that she was his girl.

  He got out of the bed, throwing the covers back over her. He hadn’t wanted to hit her but she kept going on and on about why he hadn’t professed his love to her. There was no way she was going to distract him from getting Destiny back. He told her to shut up but she hadn’t listened. So he made her shut up the only way he knew how. But he wouldn’t hurt Destiny this time if she did what he wanted. Then once he got her back to South Carolina he’d teach her a lesson that she wouldn’t soon forget.

  Moving into the bathroom he yelled and told his date to get up and get out. He heard her scurrying around his room like a scared little rat. The laughter bubbled up inside of him and he couldn’t stop even after he heard her leave his house.

  Destiny woke with a gasp, sitting straight up in bed. She felt a strange lurching in her stomach; it occurred often when she had a dream that involved Stanley. Her sheets were soaked in sweat, as was every inch of her skin. Shivering and fighting the urge to jump from the bed, Destiny curled up into a ball underneath her covers.

  The dream had been so insanely real. It was always like that when she dreamed about Stanley. There was another kind of chill when she saw a copy of the letter on her bedside table she laid there looking at it with her emotions reeling. Spotting the clothes she had on yesterday, she must have just thrown them on the floor before getting into bed. She shook herself to forget the train of thought that she had been on because that train had a destination she didn’t particularly want to arrive at.

 

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