by Alexia Purdy
“You’re pretty sharp, aren’t you?”
“Not that it does much good. I always get treated like a child.”
“You’re not a child anymore. You’ve hit your teens.”
“Yeah. It took me losing almost all my family for anyone to notice me. It’s fine, though. Shade and Benton were slave drivers. They taught me a lot of magic and how to control my fire abilities. At first, I hated them for it. But later, and especially now, I felt grateful that they were so hard on me. I feel more alone than ever, but they’re with me every step of the way.”
“Benton is still here. So is Anna. You can count on them for anything.”
“Benton has his own life. His own path. Now, with Isolde, it won’t be long before he starts his own family. Anna… well, she’s also on her own path. There’s really no room for me anywhere. It’s time I find my own road, I guess.”
“Well, for now, until you’re of age, you’re stuck with me.”
James took a small peek at me and revealed an even tinier smile. At least it wasn’t going to be as disappointing to him as I’d thought.
Suddenly, the fog parted, and a figure stood at the edge of the beach, a staff in hand and long, wild platinum hair flying around her head. Rowan looked tiny but with a swollen belly and fierce eyes as we approached.
“She’s not happy,” James commented, straightening in his seat. “She’s angry at Shade.”
“Stay behind me, James.”
James looked at me, confused. “She won’t hurt us. She needs our help as much as we need hers. It’s all right.”
I stared at James, bewildered. How would he know all that? Before I could question him further about it, the boat came to an abrupt halt, beaching itself right at Rowan’s feet.
“Rowan, Your Grace.” I bowed, keeping my eyes trained on her after hopping out of the boat. “We are humbled and honored to meet again.”
Rowan eyed me from head to toe before turning to James. She held out her hand, and he took it and placed a kiss on the top of it, bowing as well. She withdrew her hand, giving him a gentle smile, which faded as she turned back to me.
“Your wife has wreaked havoc on the Land of Faerie. My crops refuse to grow due to her wild droughts, which she has failed to wrangle.”
“Shade is no longer my spouse, and she’s probably having trouble adjusting. Give her some time. She’ll get the hang of it.”
I could see that maybe time was something Shade needed more of than the rest of us. I groaned internally for being wrong about her. She didn’t have it together yet. It brought a bittersweet relief to my constant worrying about her.
“You know nothing, do you? Whatever she is has been rather irritating.” Rowan turned and began walking toward the dead forest protecting the entrance to the archives. “Come. It’s too cold out to be idling on the beach, catching the weather on your noses.”
I glanced at James, who followed behind, looking calmer than the sea without wind. Maybe he had a calming affect on the Ancient. Whatever it was, I was glad he had come along for the ride. Rowan liked him. At least she cared for one of us. It was better than nothing.
“The archives… have they been rearranged since the last caretaker was there?” I asked.
Rowan threw an acidic glare my way, her eyes observing me with spite. What she had against me was news to me, but after a rather long moment, as we stood at the entrance, she turned, waving a hand before the boulder rolled away. It was thousands of pounds in weight, and the wild, lion-like creature she’d had the last time I was here with Soap was nowhere to be seen. I was glad she at least listened to me and had tucked it away so as to not scare James.
Sometimes the Ancients could be reasoned with. I wished Shade could be reasoned with.
“It’s been reorganized in a more efficient manner. It was a disaster.”
“I bet,” James mentioned. He began asking questions which, luckily, Rowan answered with delight. She didn’t even acknowledge my presence as we walked down the steps and into the great hall.
She had done some redecorating and reordering all right. The place was pristine, with gleaming white marble walls. No longer was it dark but bright and immaculate. Every shelf and table was neat and clean, nothing out of place. I wondered how much time Rowan had spent down here with nothing better to do.
“Did Ciaran help you with this place?”
Rowan stopped laughing with James and whipped a dirty look my way. What, how dare I ask about him?
“He’s the new archivist, but I’ve done most of the work. He is not here at the moment. He’s gone to fetch the midwife.”
I glanced at her swollen belly. She was near term or already there. I wouldn’t be surprised if she went into labor right in front of us. I hoped she waited for Ciaran.
“I see. Well, I guess we can get started.”
“Yes. Might as well get this done before I become far too busy to help you. But I need something from you first.”
I lifted a brow at her request and glanced at James, who was busy scanning the row of books nearest to us, pretending not to hear. James had mentioned that Rowan needed our help. Had he known she would ask me for something? Did he already know what it would be?
“All right, Your Grace. What is it you need?”
“My child is a son. He is to be betrothed to your eldest daughter when they are both of age. If you do not agree, I will not help you.”
My mouth dropped open. Of course. I had not thought of her child being in need of anything, especially not a future wife. I had two daughters; of course she’d want her child to start out right, as the heir of the Southern Realm.
“Um, you’re raising him, right?” I had to know this. It was well known that the Ancients did not raise their kin. Shade sure wasn’t.
“Of course not. Ciaran will raise him here, since it’ll be safe. When he is of age, he will be sent to the Scren to marry your firstborn.”
“I—I’ll have to ask Shade.”
“She has no authority over her children. You are their father and sole guardian. You have the say. Give me your decision and stop wasting my time.”
I swallowed. It was a hard decision to make when the time for it to come about was so far away, but it was closer than I cared to admit.
“Fine. Jade, my firstborn, is officially betrothed to your son. What is his birthname?”
“His name will be NiCiaran. You swear on the Land of Faerie and on your blood that this oath cannot be broken?”
“I swear on the Land of Faerie that Jade and Nicoran are betrothed and will marry when of age.”
This made Rowan smile widely, her entire face transforming before my eyes, lighting up with happiness.
“Very well, let’s get started.”
Chapter Thirteen
Shade
I picked at the slivers of ice in the palm of my hand. Corb lurked behind me; I could feel his gaze focused on me, but I didn’t turn to look at him. No one had died; I’d managed to stop just in time, but it had been far too close.
“We need to work on your ice magic.”
“I’m the Summer Queen. What good does ice magic do me now?”
“You may be the Summer Queen, but you are not Kilara. She didn’t have the uniqueness that you possess. You have so much more to offer than she ever did.”
“Like what? Killing people? Abandoning my family? Did she do all that?”
“She did her share of killing, yes. And yes, she abandoned her family as well. How do you think you came about? She had a child to continue her bloodline, which you are a part of.”
I scoffed. “Then I am exactly like her. The one person I never wanted to emulate.”
“You are not Kilara.”
“Then why are you treating me like I am?” I glared at Corb, daring him to refute my argument. I wanted to be left alone, and he didn’t seem capable of doing that.
“No, you’re not. And I’ll prove it to you.”
“How?” I asked.
He slid
down to the ground and took my hand with the slivers of ice and held on to it. Looking up at me, he smiled once more. I could get used to him smiling. It was far better than the broody demeanor I’d always known him for.
“Melt the ice.”
“That’s easy.”
I peered down at the slivers of ice and beckoned my fire magic to the surface, just to my hand. The slivers hesitated for a moment but then began to melt until only a small puddle of water remained.
“See? Easy.”
“Now freeze the water once more.”
I eyed him with suspicion. Was he insane? That would be easy as well. I peered back down at the water, telling it to freeze, but it did not. I pushed and prodded it with my mind, but it remained a puddle.
“I—I can’t seem to do it.”
“Your ice magic has been pushed out by your summer magic. The heat is now dominant, but you still possess the magic that you stole from me. I know because I have yet to regain it. You have to but assert control, and it’ll come back to you. You are the only Summer Ancient to exist with more than one power.”
“What does that make me?” I asked. Tears glistened in my eyes, the emotions running me down like I was underfoot in a stampede.
“It makes you unique and far more powerful than the rest of us.”
My eyes widened as I pondered this. Was it true? How could Corb know all this?
“I don’t want to be more powerful. I just want my old life back.”
Corb leaned forward, his forehead softly tapping against mine. “This is how you find it.”
I shook my head, tugging away. “It can’t be. I’ve lost everything.”
“You are different. You were made while pregnant. Your children will be powerful. You had the four elements at your command. You’re the only Ancient who had such power, even before you became one. There is nothing to compare you to because no one was ever as powerful as you in the past. You are one of a kind, and this journey, the one you say stole your life, is at your mercy. You can completely take it over, mold it to your desires. You only have to take it.”
“I wish you were right, Corb. But it doesn’t feel that way.”
He placed his hand over mine once more, the water slowly dripping from my palm. “Freeze it. Concentrate and it will come.”
I sighed, still not believing him, but it was worth a try. I closed my eyes as I felt the liquid seep across the lines of my palm. Freeze, I beckoned it. Freeze!
Seconds passed, and I was sure nothing had happened when Corb let go. “You did it.”
“What?” I flicked my eyes open and peered at my palm. The water had solidified, not only into a lump in my palm, but it had hardened into slivers again. How had I done it? How could I control it when I had no idea what I was doing?
“How?”
“You have to let go, Shade. Let go and let your inner spirit take the wheel.”
My fingers curled around the sharp spikes of ice until I heard them crack. Crimson blood filled my fist and dripped onto the hard ice floor.
“Shade….”
“I can’t. I won’t.”
“You already have,” Corb’s voice whispered into my ear, yanking me back from the trance I’d stepped into. I glanced at him, afraid to find a person pitying me for my insanity, but I found no such expression. I found empathy, like he’d been here before, so long ago. I looked back at my bleeding hand and let it go slack, dropping the now melting shards of ice mixed with blood. I wiped it on my dress. I didn’t care.
“There’s no way back, is there?”
“No, there isn’t. Only forward.”
I stood up then, no longer feeling the pain in my hand, for it had already healed, the flesh woven back together. All that remained of my injury was now streaked across my dress.
“I can’t move forward. I didn’t know this would ruin everything I wanted from life. Nothing’s the same, nothing can be fixed. I’m doomed.”
“You’re not doomed.” Corb pulled me into his arms, but I couldn’t even look him in the eyes. “I know it feels hopeless. You’ll go through an adjustment period before you’re able to think more clearly. I know. I went through it myself.”
“But Kilara helped you, didn’t she?”
“Yes. She seduced me.”
“You loved her though.”
“Not at first.”
I perked up at this and looked at Corb’s face. He looked deadly serious talking about it. I couldn’t ever imagine a time when Corb hadn’t liked Kilara.
“What do you mean?”
“I was angry at first. Kilara had tricked me. She took me to the Heart of Fire and Ice, for that is the center of magic in Faerie. It chooses the next rulers of the realms. She detested the last Ice King and had chosen me to take his place, unbeknownst to me, of course.”
“She took you there without telling you why?” I was astounded. That was cold, even for Kilara. I had known what would happen when Kilara eventually died, but I hadn’t realized that I’d gone there to make it happen in that moment. I knew exactly how Corb had felt.
“She wanted what she wanted. You know how she was. She would get what she wanted with or without your consent.”
I shook my head. “She was horrid.”
“She was my love for a long time though.”
“But you said you didn’t love her at first.”
“No.” He glanced away, staring at the icy walls as they shifted before our eyes. I wondered if he was doing it subconsciously, moving the ice like a labyrinth in his mind. “I loathed her for taking me away from my family. I could never make myself known to them again.”
“Your faery wife and son… what happened to them?”
“They died.”
“Oh.” He’d already told me that, and I felt embarrassed for forgetting, but so much had been happening that I couldn’t keep it all straight. At least he didn’t seem insulted by my lapse. “But you had Ursad later?”
“Yes, with a beautiful princess. She raised him well, even with my intrusions now and then.” He watched me, pensively. “You know, Ursad wasn’t in the greatest of shape the last time I saw him. You did a number on him.”
I looked up at Corb, shocked. “What did I do to him?” I recalled nothing.
“He was in love with you, yet you married another. Plus, I forced him to betray you, trapping you and Dylan in my castle. He hated following my orders. He still does, but he can’t resist. Just about as much as you could resist Kilara’s demands.”
“Our descendants suffer, don’t they? Why are we forced to have children when all we do is torment them?”
“Because that is the way of the Land of Faerie.”
I flinched, but it was true. “Ursad… he’s all right, isn’t he?” I made a mental note to visit him as soon as I could. I wondered if he knew I was now an Ancient of Faerie.
“He’ll be fine. Just a bit wearied at the moment.” Corb brushed off the subject of his son without another thought. It was easy to do when you didn’t care about anything.
“So how did Kilara get you to fall in love with her?” I could take a hint to change the subject.
“Ursad’s mother?” Corb stared at me, confused.
“No. I meant Kilara. How did she finally get you to fall in love with her? You obviously did, and hard. You spent years looking for her as though she were the only thing that mattered.”
“She was. I was lost back then. I was devastated about losing my family, feeling alone. I was a descendant of the last Ice King, but I wasn’t necessarily destined for this life. It was pure chance she picked me. She could have picked my father or his father before him, yet it was I who caught her attentions.”
“So you were feeling alone. That’s how you fell in love with her?”
“Oh, no. I banished her from my sight the moment I realized who she truly was. I avoided her for a long while, but like I said, being alone as a newly fledged Ancient was hard. I finally let her in when she offered to help me adjust to my new life
and powers. I had never had ice powers before; it was quite the experience. She didn’t have them either but was able to coax them out of me after demonstrating her fire powers.”
“It’s the same, isn’t it? Like fire, like ice.”
“Yes. The same. She gave me pointers, helped me adjust. Most of all, she talked to me and let me vent. She was the most patient I had ever seen any woman be, and that was what finally won me over.”
“But she stopped loving you.”
Corb frowned for the first time since he’d begun helping me. He looked genuinely pained.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring it up. I was just—”
He held a hand up. “It’s all right. It’s not your fault. I wanted to help you, and that involves telling you everything. I want it to be revealed so that you can understand things a lot more readily. Yes, she stopped loving me, but from what I later learned, she became quite ill and refused to tell me. With this illness came madness, and with her madness came her absolute avoidance of me. She didn’t want me to know that she was fading… that the time had finally come to pass on the crown. In the end, it was the worst thing she could have done, but it doesn’t really matter anymore now.”
“How did you stand it?”
Corb furrowed his brow, confused. “What do you mean?”
“Losing her. How did you stand it?”
He exhaled, turning away to stare at the ice beyond. It shuddered under his gaze, knowing its master was disturbed. I hated to shake his feelings to the core, but I had to know the truth. I had to know if being an Ancient would always hurt this badly.
“The truth is, I still can’t stand it, not even now.”
Chapter Fourteen
Dylan
Flipping through the archives was tedious work. I was ready to give up hours into it, but James, who was immersed in volumes of fae history, couldn’t pull himself away, barely to eat as I offered him food from the stash I’d brought. I hadn’t expected Rowan to be the perfect hostess, and as predicted, she’d disappeared for the vast majority of the time we’d spent digging through the neatly filed system she’d made.