by Lila Rose
“Old enough to know better.” His voice was sad when he spoke. I glanced over my shoulder to see he had a glare in his eyes and his lips were thinned, like he’d sucked something sour. What was he thinking and what did he mean by it?
I could see he wasn’t going to answer my question, again. So I changed the subject. “I see you didn’t get fired.”
“My Watson, you are so observant. No, poppet, I didn’t get fired. No one dobbed on the big, in-my-pants, gay guy.”
Why did he want to leave when he applied for the job in the first place? So I asked him, “How come you went for the job if you wanted to be fired on the first day?”
He rubbed higher, just above my knees and I swear I was drooling. I’d be embarrassed if there ended up being a pile of drool on the floor.
“I didn’t want the job, angel-cake. Though, it has its perks. I get to see near naked men all afternoon. I get to touch them, perv on them and tease them…now, if only you all liked everything I said.”
I do.
What I didn’t like was the fact he enjoyed touching, teasing and perving on all of the team. It left me feeling deflated, if only my cock got the message.
“I still don’t get it. Why go to the interview for this job if you didn’t want it?”
His hands stilled on my upper thighs and then fell away. The next second, I felt a slap to my arse. I jumped and my dick perked up even more, but it was sorely disappointed when Julian said, “We’re done here. I have to get moving, I have two others to get my hands on.”
Lifting my head, I looked to the clock on the far wall. “We still have ten minutes left.”
“Yeah? Well, pookie, I’m not a fan of all the questions. So we’ll skip the next ten. Come on, up and at ‘em.”
“What if I keep my mouth shut, will you keep going then?” Because, apparently, I liked to torture myself, especially my pecker.
“Fine, but no more questions. Let me just worship your body.”
Yes, please.
“Nothing seems to faze you, the way I talk I mean,” he uttered and the confusion in his voice was present.
No, nothing bothered me. He could do anything to me. I let out a deranged chuckle and said, “Nope, it doesn’t bother me.”
“Right.” I thought that would have been the end of chatting. I was wrong. “Why are you so different than the rest, Matthew Alexander? The others tell me to shut the fuck up…but you, you like to talk to me. You want to know things about me. Why?”
Shit. Shit. Shit.
I didn’t know the guys didn’t talk to him.
“What, so it’s okay for you to ask questions about me, but not for me to ask them about you, Julian?”
His light, sweet chuckle filled the room. “Touché, Mattie, touché.”
For the final seven minutes, we were silent. Though, if my dick could talk, it would be yelling for attention. Instead, Julian worked my muscles like a pro, rubbing all the aches and stress away for the entire half an hour with him.
Once Julian stepped away, I sat up and secured the towel around my waist, using the edge of my hand to hold down my erection. I glanced at Julian, his eyes travelled my body. Worried he’d see I was hard, I quickly jumped off the table and made my way to the door.
“Till next time, poppet,” he called.
At the door, I looked over my shoulder and sent Julian a small smile. He drew in a deep breath, his eyes on my mouth. “See you next week, Julian, with new questions.”
He rolled his eyes at me, but I saw the smile lighting his face. “We’ll see.”
With that, I opened the door and walked out of the room, fighting myself all the way to the showers to not go back and take what was supposed to be mine.
Wow. Seriously? Mine?
Shaking my head, I smiled. I really liked the thought of Julian being mine.
After I showered and dressed in jeans and a hooded jumper. I walked out of the building heading to my car. Cock-sucking damn. A few of my team mates were loitering near my car and they had a handful of women hanging off them. I wasn’t in the mood for it, but having my car right near them, I was out of options. So I stalked my way to the car.
“Yo, Alexander. Get over here,” Peterson yelled.
“Nah, man, I got shit to do.”
I nearly escaped as well, until Sarah Smith, local team slut came out of the shadows as I was unlocking my car door.
“Hey, sexy. You looked good in practise, good enough to eat.” She slid her arm around my waist, and before I could say or do anything, she guided me over to the other players who were now all smirking at me.
Who was I kidding? I could have stopped her. I could have said something, but I didn’t, because I didn’t want to look any different to the other idiots on the team.
So I glided my arm around her shoulders and brought her body close to mine.
When it came to women, I wasn’t a virgin. I’d lost my virginity to an old friend/ex-girlfriend. Her name was Bella. It was when we were both fourteen and didn’t know what we were doing. We stayed together for three and a half years. It was her who helped me last year to figure out why I wasn’t interested in sex. I’d just been doing it with the wrong type of person.
“Later, fag,” Jackson suddenly called out. I caught his chin lift to someone behind me and turned both Sarah and myself to see Julian. With his shoulders slouched, and his gait fast, he headed to his car.
“Hey, fag, you better watch those hands of yours, wouldn’t want them broken.” Jackson taunted.
And because I was an idiot.
Because I was a fake.
When the others laughed. I chuckled out a false chuckle with them.
Only when I did, I looked over to see if Julian had noticed. Our eyes met. In them, I saw pain. My mouth snapped shut and I hoped to Christ he saw regret in my eyes before he got into his vehicle.
Stupid. Stupid fool.
That was all I was. No, I was worse than that. I was one of them. I was a meat-head bigot. Though, I couldn’t say they were all bad. Some were good guys. They weren’t weak like me. If they didn’t like something, they said it.
“Jackson, don’t be a dick,” Lions growled. “Bunch of fucking kids,” he said and walked off.
“What’s up his arse?” Peterson asked.
Jackson snorted. “Maybe the fag guy’s dick.”
They laughed once again. Only that time, I didn’t.
“Hey, you okay?” Sarah asked, her hand lying across my chest.
A nod. “Yeah, fine, but I have to get home. Some family shit.” I removed my arm and stepped away, walking to my car. “Later,” I called over my shoulder. However, I wished I didn’t. I wished I was like Lions and called them out for being fucking bastards.
I was a coward.
The drive home didn’t curb my emotions. I wanted to find Julian, to apologise for what he saw, for being one of them, when deep down, I wasn’t.
But I didn’t, and when I walked in the house later, I saw Dad sitting in the living room chair. He took one look at me and asked what was wrong.
“Nothing,” I snapped. “I just suck.”
Dad snorted. “We know that now, son.”
My eyes widened and a sudden burst of laughter fell from my mouth. “Jesus, Dad, I didn’t mean it like that.”
He chuckled. “I know, but you looked like hell coming through that door, so at least I got you to smile.” He stood from his chair and added, “I’m going to get a beer, and kid, watch that mouth when you’re around your mother.”
Shaking my head at how sometimes my parents shocked me to the point of being stunned, I walked off toward the hall. At least there was no dull moment in the Alexander household.
In my room, my thoughts drifted back to Julian.
I had to make it up to him…one way or another. I just had to figure out how.
Chapter Four
Julian
How lame was I to think Mattie was different from the others. I thought he actually cared. No other
Well, fuck him.
I wish.
No, I didn’t.
Besides, the fact I was seventeen years older than him and he was a jerk like the rest gave me enough reason to steer clear. I had to get him off my mind. I needed to find someone else to play with.
Which was why, two days later, I was standing in a club watching the bodies on the dance floor dry-hump each other. I also had my eagle eye out for some candy to take home that night.
“Did you hear from your aunt?” Melissa asked from beside me.
After taking a sip of my whiskey on the rocks, I looked down at her small form and shook my head. “I found out she’s on a holiday with her family. Some remote area where no contact is welcome. When they get back, I’ll try again.”
I’d decided to go behind my parents’ backs and go directly to my aunt to plead my case for my cousin’s safety. I loved my aunt and she loved me. We had a close connection, even though we lived miles away and hardly spoke. She was the only one who believed me about my grandfather. At the time, she wanted to take me into her home, but of course, my father wouldn’t have it.
“I hope they come back soon. If your parents come to your place again, Julian, I won’t be a happy girl and they’ll know about it.”
If my parents were smart, which they were not, they’d stay away.
Melissa was actually being serious. I wasn’t sure what her past entailed, but it was brutal and she knew how to handle herself. I had seen it one time. We’d been out clubbing—nothing new—when she stepped outside to get some fresh air. Noticing she’d been gone for a while, I went out looking for her, leaving my sparkly new toy inside, not knowing that what I saw next would have me going home alone.
When I opened the front door to exit, I didn’t see her anywhere. I headed down the walkway a little and found her in an alleyway surrounded by four men. I went to run and help her—I was gay, not a pussy—until I noticed Melissa shake her head, thankfully. Because if I had gone flying to the rescue, minus my leotard, I would have had the shit beat out of me, like the four men did. It was amazing to witness a short Punky Brewster, zone into something else, where nothing mattered around her but the elimination of the four who were fucking with her.
“Not much to look at tonight,” Melissa complained. We were leaning against the bar, sipping our elixir of the night when I spotted a cute, older man, wearing suit pants and a white shirt give me a smile.
“I’m not sure about that. I think I found my prey.” I laughed and gestured with my head to Mr Tall and Handsome. I just hoped he was well endowed.
“Mel, Julian,” was yelled from our left side. We both turned to see Cherry, an old acquaintance of ours. She giddily waved, beamed, and ran over to us. “I didn’t know you two were coming tonight. It’s so great to see you both here. It’s been so long,” she said as she hugged us. “Come on over to the booth. Mandy and Kate are there. They’d love to see you.”
Looking to Melissa, I saw her shrug so I said, “Sure, buttercake, but not for long, I need to find a nice piece of sausage for the night and I already have my eyes on one,” I explained and winked at said victim, who in turn blushed, and then sent me a mega-watt smile. Cherry grabbed my hands. I reached behind me in time to take Melissa’s before I was dragged to the far side of the dance floor where ten or so booth tables sat.
“Mandy, Kate, look who I found,” Cherry yelled.
She pulled me to a stop beside her, in front of a booth that sat Kate, a tall, curly headed blonde, and Mandy, a chubby, black-haired beauty. “Hey, bitches.” I smiled and air-kissed each woman.
“Hey all,” Melissa said beside me. I glanced to see her eyes wander to another booth. I went to look until Mandy grabbed my hand and dragged me down next to her.
“Julian, I am so glad you are here. Kate and I need your help. See those guys over there, what’s your take on them?”
Looking to where she was pointing, I saw a group of four men. All in jeans and different coloured tees. “My take would be to wish them all gay so I could have a go at each one of them. Alas, they were not. Though, from their relaxed posture and smiling faces, they seemed like an edible bunch, ones who would treat my girls right for the night.”
“Yay,” Kate yelled and clapped her hands. “Should we make the first move?”
Shaking my head, I said, “Hell to the no. Let them stalk you hooker ladies. You need to get their attention somehow.” While thinking, I looked up to see Melissa in a conversation with Cherry; however, her eyes were still trained on something or someone behind me. She must have found her dipping sauce for the night.
Clicking my fingers, I announced, “I’ve got it. Get your sweet arses up there on the dance floor. Dance your way over to them. Do your girl thing you ladies love to do and hump each other’s legs. That will get their attention.”
“You are the best, babe.” Kate grinned. She scooted out of the booth, and I quickly stood so Mandy could get out. They excused Cherry from her conversation with Melissa and dragged her out onto the dance floor. There they went for it, rubbing each other and grinding on each other as they danced their way across the floor.
Sitting back down, I watched when they got close to the men. It didn’t take long for their eyes to find my girls. One was brave enough to make the first move, walking up to dance behind Kate. She looked over to me and gave me the thumbs up sign. I chuckled and sent her a wink.
Melissa got my attention when she sat opposite me. “I don’t like it.”
Puzzled, my brows drew up and I asked, “What?”
“The guy behind you at the booth, sitting with a girl; he hasn’t taken his eyes off you for some reason. What I don’t like is the hard stare in his eyes.”
Shrugging, I said, “Twinkle-toes, I always get that look no matter where I am. He either hates me for being so awesome or wants a piece of me. But if he can’t be man enough to make up his mind and either tell me to go fuck myself or tell me he wants to fuck me, then forget about it. I don’t let that shit get to me so you shouldn’t.”
“I’m not sure it’s a look of hate. He seems perplexed about something. He hates something, but I’m getting the feeling that it isn’t you. I—”
“Hey.”
We both looked up to see Mr Suit standing at the side of the booth, smiling shyly down at me. “Well, hello there, handsome. What can I do for you?”
Snorting, Melissa leaned back in the booth. While Mr Suit blushed and stammered out, “I-I, um, I was wondering, if, um…” He licked his lips and I knew then he wanted my lips upon his. Of course, I was more than willing to please the man.
Slowly, I stood from the booth. He didn’t back up to give me room, so as soon as I was standing in front of him, our bodies rubbed against each other. The hardness at my hip indicated he was sure happy to see me. My dick perked up. He would have liked something thicker and longer to play with, but we couldn’t be too picky.
“What’s your name, sugar?”
“S-Steven.”
He was shorter than me. I watched his eyes as they followed my mouth when I said, “Hi, Steven. My name is Julian. Want to be best of friends tonight?”
“Yes.” His hands went to my hips. I placed mine on his arms, over his jacket.
“Do you want me to kiss you, Steven?” I rolled my eyes as he looked around. Probably worried what sort of scene we were making, wondering if he could get in trouble for it.
He licked his lips and nodded.
“Good answer.” I smiled. Just as I was descending to touch my lips against his, he was roughly yanked away. Blinking, I stood straight and instead of having Steven in front of me, my eyes widened to find Mattie there.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Mattie barked in my face, his cold eyes piercing into me.
Placing my hands on my hips, I snapped, “Well, I would have been lip locking it with that guy,”—I pointed over his shoulder to the worried Steven, though Mattie didn’t turn his glare from me to look—“but then you stopped it.”
“Did you not see he has a fucking wedding ring on his finger?”
Startled, I looked over Mattie’s shoulder to Steven who guiltily placed his hands behind his back.
Well, damn.
“You can go now,” I ordered Steven.
“But—”
Mattie turned then.
He turned, oh so slowly, to face Steven and growled, “Fuck off. Now.” Steven visibly swallowed a big gulp of air, spun, and just about ran off.
My dick throbbed behind my jeans.
We loved Mattie’s growly voice.
Once Mattie turned his glacial glare back to me, I demanded, “What are you doing?”
His head jutted back. “What do you mean?”
Melissa stood beside me. I glanced at her to see she was smiling as she said, “He means, why did you interrupt their little…tomfoolery?”
He opened his mouth, closed it, only to open it again to say, “He shouldn’t want to…get with married men.”
“Why do you care what I do?”
He blanched, took a step back and closed his eyes. Once he took a deep breath, he opened them, his eyes warmer. “I shouldn’t,” he uttered.
He shouldn’t what? Care?
My heart thumped, smiled and screamed: he cared.
Why?
The man in front of me confused me more than men who wore sandals and socks together.
“Matthew, are you ready to go?” I didn’t want to look away from my toy-boy’s eyes. The way they searched me, the way they made me feel important was thrilling. But I did and I wished I could take back that thrill. Because a small young woman stepped up to my toy-boy and placed her arm around his waist.
His gaze was pulled from me. He looked down to her with devotion and smiled. “Yeah, baby, let’s get out of here.” His eyes landed on me for the last time and they were once again cold and unsure. “See you, Julian.”
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