by A. T Brennan
* * * * *
At twenty after seven I handed Mom the papers and told her I needed to go find Blaze so I could get him to work. I’d texted him a few times but hadn’t gotten an answer. That was strange, but I tried not to worry about it. He was probably trying to be polite and not answer his phone while he was with my dad.
Everyone had cleared out of the house and the only person around as my dad and the staff, and he was alone.
“Where’s Blaze?” I asked as I came up to my father.
“He left.”
“He what? When?”
“He and I had a little chat and he decided it would be best if he left.”
“You what?” Alarm bells went off in my head, and when I looked at my mother she was standing there with a serene smile on her lips. “What did you do?” I demanded as I swung my gaze back to my father.
“He’s not the one for you. He sees that now.”
My jaw dropped as the severity of my father’s words washed over me.
“What did you say to him?”
“That you are a Wells and your place in this family doesn’t include him. You’ll get whatever this is out of your system and then settle down with a wife. It’s best that he hears it now before any real damage is done.”
“You had no right—”
“I did it for you, for your own good—”
“When have you ever given a shit about me?” I demanded, my voice echoing in the empty room. “When have you ever cared one way or another what I did? Nothing I’ve ever done has been good enough, and now you tried to drive away the man I love because he doesn’t fit what you want for me?”
“Don’t talk to me in that tone of voice, son—”
“If you can’t accept me for who I am then I’m not your son.” I spun on my heel and gave my mother a hard look. “Either of yours.”
“Galen—”
I ignored my father and stormed out of the house. I had to get to Blaze and try to undo whatever my father said to him.
It took far too long to get my car, and the three texts and two phone calls I’d made to Blaze’s phone weren’t answered. I drove as fast as I could, but at eight o’clock I was still on the road.
Not caring about anything other than finding Blaze I used the voice controls on the car to call Blaze’s work.
“The Den, Tristan speaking.”
“Is Blaze there, please?”
“He’s taken a sick day. Is there a message?”
“No, thanks.”
I pushed the hang-up button on the steering wheel and tried not to panic. It had been hours since Blaze would have left my parents’ house. I had no idea where he was or what state he was in. I needed to find him, now.
I called my building and asked them to check the log. Blaze hadn’t used his key card to get in and there’d been no activity on my door since we’d left this afternoon.
“Fuck!” I slammed my hand against the steering wheel. I was furious at my family, and I’d meant what I’d said. I had no problem cutting them out of my life if they couldn’t accept me for who I was.
At the moment my fear for Blaze was stronger than my fury, and scenario after scenario of horrible things that could be happening to him went through my mind as I drove to Blaze’s apartment, praying he’d be home.
When I finally got to his place I pulled into the backlot and slammed my car into park. I barely remembered to lock the door before I jumped out and ran up his stairs.
“Blaze?” I knocked on his door. I could see light coming through the window so I knew he was in there, or at least had been. “Blaze! Come on, baby. Let me in if you’re home.”
When there was no answer I tested the doorknob and almost cried out in relief as it twisted in my hand.
“Blaze...”
Everything I was going to say to him died on my lips as I took in the scene in front of me.
Blaze was sitting on his futon with an open bottle of whiskey on the coffee table in front of him and a glass half-full of the amber liquid in his hand. Tears were streaming down his face and he looked broken.
“Baby?” I asked softly as I closed the door and came to sit on the other end of the futon. He looked so out of it I was afraid of spooking him.
“I didn’t even think when I bought it.”
I didn’t need him to indicate to the whiskey because I knew that’s what he was talking about. His words didn’t sound slurred, but that didn’t mean he hadn’t had a drink.
“I needed it.”
“Did you drink any?” I asked softly.
“No. I wanted to. I still want to, but I can’t.”
Relief washed over me and I slid closer so I could gently pull the glass out of his hand. He didn’t even look at me as I picked up the bottle and took both to the sink to pour them out.
Thank god he hadn’t broken his sobriety. Considering how hard he’d worked and all the progress he’d made, I didn’t know how he would have recovered from that.
When the bottle and glass were empty I went back to sit with him on the futon.
“Blaze?” I asked when the silence stretched on.
“I knew I wasn’t good enough for you.”
“Baby—”
“I’m tainted, Galen. Your dad saw it, everyone sees it. You deserve someone who—”
“I don’t give a fuck about what you or my parents think is best for me or what I deserve,” I cut him off. “I want you. I love you.”
Blaze’s eyes finally slid over to look at me.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, but I love you. I want you and only you. I don’t care about anything other than making a life with you. If my family can’t handle that then fuck them. I already told them I’m done with them. They don’t matter to me. You matter. You’re the only person who matters, Blaze.”
“Everything your dad said, it brought me back...”
“To when your dad kicked you out?” I asked softly, shifting closer to him.
He nodded, his haunted eyes finally meeting mine.
“I’m so sorry that happened. I wish I could take this pain away.”
“Can you love me? Can you really love me, Galen, knowing everything you do about me?”
“Everything you’ve been through has shaped you into the amazing, caring, compassionate, humble and gorgeous man that I’m madly in love with. I wish you hadn’t suffered, but none of that means shit to me. Your past has no bearing on how I feel about you.”
“Even though I—”
“You’re not tainted, Blaze.” I moved so we were close enough that my leg brushed his as I sat facing him. “I’ve never thought that, and you shouldn’t either. You’re a survivor.”
“Did you mean what you said, about building a life with me?” he asked, raking his hand over his eyes to wipe away his tears.
I caught his hands before he could do it again and leaned over him so I could kiss the few tears he’d missed away.
“Yes. I did.”
“And if your family doesn’t change their minds? If they can’t accept us, me?”
“You’re all the family I need. You and your friends are more than enough for me.”
A wobbly smile tugged at his full lips and a rush of happiness went through me. I knew I hadn’t fixed the damage my father’s words and actions had done, but at least Blaze knew the truth about how I felt.
“I love you too.” He reached out to grip one of my hands. “Was kinda hoping for a better way to say it, but I do. I love you.”
Heat and love spread out into my body from deep in my core and I felt lighter than I ever had. As I pulled Blaze closer so I could cover his lips with mine in a sweet kiss, I couldn’t stop myself from grinning against his mouth.
I was finally free to be myself, and I’d found the perfect partner in Blaze. I no longer cared about what my family thought about me, and I was ready to cut every toxic tie to them if they couldn’t change.
Life wasn’t perfect, but at the moment, it was pretty damn close
.
Epilogue
Blaze
Six months later
“Fuck,” Galen hissed as I slipped inside his body.
“Does that feel good, baby?” I asked huskily, letting my tongue trace over the shell of his ear.
“Oh fuck,” he murmured, his hands gripping the backs of my thighs as he pulled me closer.
“That’s it, nice and quiet.” I pulled out until only my tip was left inside him, then surged forward in a hard thrust that had him biting back a curse filled cry.
I tried to tease him with slow, deep thrusts, but after a few moments my body tightened and I wasn’t able to hold back any longer.
I slipped my hands from his chest to the tops of his shoulders and held Galen close as I snapped my hips in a frantic and almost frenzied pace, ramming into him as hard and as fast as I could.
We were both grunting and panting, desperately trying to keep our voices down as we were driven higher and higher.
I knew everyone at the party would know exactly what we were doing the moment we’d slipped into the store room under the guise of looking for a specific bottle of wine, but that didn’t mean we had to give everyone a show.
“Come for me, baby,” I urged as my balls tightened and my thighs cramped. I was close, too close.
“Almost there, babe. I’m so close.”
Galen’s left hand closed around mine and I smiled against his neck as our new rings clinked together softly.
It had only been three days since Galen had surprised me with the proposal. I’d bought him a ring over a month ago, trying to figure out the perfect time to propose, but he’d beaten me to it.
It had been low-key and perfect. He’d simply handed me the box after dinner one night and waited while I opened it. When I’d seen the simple gold ring with a black band running through it, I’d almost burst out laughing. When Galen had given me a strange look I’d schooled my features and waited expectantly.
“Marry me?” he’d asked, and I’d pulled the ring free and slipped it on my finger.
“Hell yeah.”
After kissing him I’d told him to wait for a moment and had gone to the bedroom and found my old duffle bag. I’d dug out the ring I’d picked out for him and brought it to the table.
He’d taken the box with a smile, but when he’d seen the ring he’d burst out laughing.
We’d chosen the exact same ring.
“Marry me?” I’d asked teasingly as he slipped the ring on his finger and admired it for a moment.
“Oh hell yeah.” He’d nodded, grinning up at me.
The rest of the night had been a blur of orgasms and kisses, and when I’d gone to work the next day Galen had come with me so we could share the news with our family.
Layla and Evan had thrown together a small engagement party for us after closing tonight and we’d been hanging out with everyone when Galen had looked at me with pure hunger in his eyes. I’d made some lame excuse about going to look for a bottle of wine and asked Galen to come with me. No one had said a word, although Rhys and Cody had winked at me as we’d passed them.
I’m not even sure the storeroom door had fully closed before we’d been on each other, and after a bit of rushed kissing Galen had undone his pants and dropped them before turning around for me.
“Fuck you feel so good,” he panted, grunting softly as I hammered into him over and over again.
“Ready, baby?”
“I’m ready.” He nodded, gripping my hand tighter. “I love you.”
“I love you.” I kissed his neck and squeezed my eyes closed as his words washed over me, sending me over the edge.
I felt his ass clamp down on my cock as his orgasm hit him only seconds later, and it took every ounce of self-control I had not to let my knees buckle and fall to the floor.
We managed to stay on our feet, but stayed pressed together for a few minutes as we caught our breath and basked in the moment. When my spent cock slipped out of him he turned his face to mine for a deep kiss, his tongue twining and toying with mine. Before things could get too hot and heavy again, I broke the kiss and stepped back.
It took us a moment to clean up, pull our pants up and right our clothes. I smoothed out my hair but knew my face was flushed and Galen’s eyes were sparkling and bright. There was no way we could hide what we’d just done, and I knew no one would care.
My life was finally falling into place.
I was marrying the man of my dreams, the same man who’d encouraged me to take some courses at the local community college so I could eventually get my degree in social work and start a career helping kids who’d been put in the same position I had.
Galen had also moved to a different firm and now focused on family law and advocating for kids who found themselves in the system. It didn’t pay nearly as much, and the work was emotionally draining some days, but he was so much happier, and I loved seeing him smile as he told me about the kids he worked with.
His family still hadn’t come around, but he’d been telling the truth when he’d said he didn’t care and he’d cut all of them out of his life. He’d become close with all of my friends, and he’d won Layla over the first time he’d met her.
We had our makeshift family and we had each other. It was everything I’d always dreamed of but never thought I’d have, and it was perfect.
Preview of Book Two – Healing Him
Chapter One
Cody
“I’m fucking bored.” I leaned against the counter and sighed audibly.
“You’re always bored.” Blaze looked up from where he was chopping up lemon slices and grinned. “Seriously, dude. You have the attention span of a toddler.”
“And you’re so interested in those lemons because you’re not bored?” I shot back.
“Trust me when I say it’s not the lemons I’m thinking about.” Blaze waggled his eyebrows at me and I couldn’t help laughing.
“Yeah, well not all of us have super hot boyfriends to think about.”
Blaze didn’t answer, he just winked and pushed his tray of cut lemon wedges toward me.
“So things are good?” I dumped the wedges in a container and checked to see how much mint we had on hand. For some reason mint juleps were the in drink and people were ordering them like crazy.
“They’re good.” He nodded.
“Has his family come around?” I asked softly.
A few months ago Blaze and his boyfriend Galen had gone to a party at Galen’s parent’s house. It had been a coming out of sorts for Galen, and the first time Blaze had met anyone in his family.
Outwardly the only person who seemed to object to their relationship had been Galen’s older brother, but then halfway through the party Galen’s dad had taken Blaze aside while his mother had distracted Galen. His dad had offered Blaze forty thousand dollars to disappear from Galen’s life because he didn’t accept his son being gay. When Blaze had told him to fuck off Galen’s dad had Blaze escorted from the property by armed men and Galen hadn’t realized what had happened for a few hours.
For most people that would have been annoying and humiliating, but for Blaze it had cut deep since he’d been kicked out at fifteen because his ultra-religious parents hadn’t been able to accept that he was gay.
The real kicker was that Blaze had undergone two rounds of conversion therapy at the insistence of his parents that had basically been a cover for the ‘therapists’ to use sexual and physical abuse to try and pray the gay out of him. When Galen’s father had rejected him so harshly it had brought back a lot of painful memories, and Blaze had almost relapsed on two years of sobriety and started drinking again.
He’d been messed up for a while and I’d talked him into going back to Open Arms, the LGBT shelter we’d both spent some time at, to talk to a counsellor who understood specifically what he’d gone through. It seemed to have helped and he’d gone a few times a week for almost a month before he’d felt he was ready to put it all behind him and focus on the fu
ture.
“No, they haven’t.”
“And Galen’s still okay?”
“Yeah, he’s doing good with everything. He’s never really felt like a part of them anyway, so it’s not that big of a change for him.”
“So, have you officially moved in with him yet?” I asked, and the grin on Blaze’s face told me everything. “When?”
“I gave my notice for the end of last month, so about a week now.”
“You didn’t tell me.” I tossed a rag at him. “You’re supposed to tell me these things.”
“It’s not a big deal.” He threw the rag back at me and I caught it out of the air. “I was basically living there anyway. Now it’s just official.”
“Yes, it is,” I insisted. “I need to live vicariously through you and your domestic happiness.”
“What about you?” he asked as he knelt in front of the cooler to do inventory of what was stocked. “You moved out of Layla’s.”
“Yeah, but I moved out alone.”
“I’m happy for you, Cody.” Blaze looked up from the cooler and smiled. “Really, it’s awesome.”
I flushed at his words and tried to think of something to say that wasn’t completely mushy or stupid.
Out of all the guys who worked at The Den, I was closest with Blaze. I didn’t know if it was because we were only a few years apart in age, or if it was our similar histories, but I was able to relate to him in a way I couldn’t relate to the other guys at the bar.
They were all awesome, including our boss Evan, and I’d take a bullet for them no questions asked, but I still felt a little removed from them.
I was the youngest at the bar, and at twenty-one it sometimes felt like everyone thought of me as a kid. It didn’t help that I was also only five-foot-nine, while everyone else topped six feet, and I was slender so I looked like I was still in high school. I’d been working at the bar for over a year, but had only started bartending on my birthday because I hadn’t been legal.
Layla was our day manager, and she’d taken to me and Blaze right away and mothered us like no one else. She was an amazing woman and she’d done so much to help me, including letting me rent out her spare bedroom for almost a year while I learned how to be independent and felt ready to be on my own.