It took every ounce of willpower to keep from turning the air blue with her retort. She settled for a mumbled, “Go to hell.”
His soft chuckle did more to wake her up than ten cups of coffee. It rumbled ever so gently through the air. Slipping beneath the covers, it seeped straight through her skin, burrowing deep into the pit of her stomach. It stayed there, warming her, teasing her toward wakefulness. What would it be like to greet each day with such a delicious sound? Better than coffee—and she could have sworn there was nothing better than coffee first thing in the morning.
“Interesting.” He approached, intensifying the warmth, turning up the heat to a fast, fierce burn. “Are we always so grumpy in the morning?”
She had to get rid of him before it got any hotter and she burst into flames. No telling what she’d do, if that happened. She’d become painfully susceptible to him, aroused by everything from his whiskey-rough voice to his soul-shattering touch. But first thing in the morning, before she’d had a chance to rebuild her defenses, having him this close was pure torture. It ought to be illegal. That way she wouldn’t be tempted to turn amusing fantasy into delicious reality.
“No, we apparently are not grumpy in the morning. But I am. Now take your disgusting happy faces and get the h—” Her suggestion ended in a shriek as Raven ruthlessly stripped the blanket off her, exposing the silk boxers and skimpy cotton T-shirt she’d purchased for sleepwear. “What are you doing?”
His eyes caught fire as he saw what she wore—a fire that exactly mirrored the one scorching a path through her. Through. Over. In. Around. He exhaled harshly. “I’m waking up a grouchy fairy so she can start giving a little girl her wish.”
Her memory finally came on-line. River. The wish. Raven. The kiss. “You told her?”
“Yup.” His smile ate into her. “That way I could set the ground rules.”
Ground rules? She knew his announcement should worry her, but she couldn’t quite figure out why. “Don’t you think you should have waited until I got up before letting her know?”
“After seeing what you’re like first thing in the morning, I’m grateful I didn’t.” Wrapping a hand around her middle, he hoisted her off the couch. “Up and at ’em, fairy lady.”
“Hey!” Bent almost double, she tried to glare at him over her shoulder. A tousled black curtain of hair obscured her vision, thwarting her. She bicycled frantically through the air, getting nowhere fast. “Let go!”
He lowered her a few tantalizing inches, allowing her toes to skim the carpet. “What will you do if I put you down?”
“Go back to sleep, of course.”
“Wrong answer.” He heaved her upward, his hands brushing the underside of her breasts.
“Don’t you dare,” she yelped.
“Oh, I dare,” he retorted softly. “You’d be amazed at how much I dare.”
River burst out laughing. “Don’t, Daddy. Don’t put her down. Spin her around like you spin me.”
“Care for a spin, Ms. Randell?”
“No!”
“You can’t call her Ms. Randell, Daddy. You have to call her Mommy.”
He hesitated for a split second and J.J. stopped struggling. “She’s not my mother, River.”
“Then call her Justice. And she can call you Raven. That’s what Mommy called you, right?”
“I—” Raven broke off, clearly unable to continue.
Slowly he eased J.J. to the floor. His arms still confined her, but a different sort of tension hummed through him—one precipitated by his daughter. His rapid breath tangled in J.J.’s hair and the muscles spanning his chest formed a rigid wall. His hands shifted, one settling on her hip, the other splayed across her abdomen. He eased forward while at the same time maneuvering her a tiny half step backward.
Her warmth collided with his. If she didn’t know better she’d suspect having her in his arms afforded him a small measure of comfort. It was a ridiculous thought—but one that refused to fade.
Ever so gently, she slipped her hands across his, coupling their fingers, silently willing him some of her own strength.
At her touch, his voice broke loose. “Yeah, pumpkin. Your mother called me Raven.”
River climbed onto J.J.’s bed and jumped up and down. “And honey. And sweetheart. And darling.” She wrinkled her nose, her silvery-blue eyes alight with laughter. “Are you going to call Justice mushy names for vacation?”
“It’s J.J., not Justice. And she isn’t my wife.”
Anguish ripped through his words and JJ. couldn’t help herself. She turned ever so slightly and pressed a kiss to his chest. Her hair swept forward, hiding the compassionate act from River. But Raven felt it. He absorbed the gesture as if it were a blow, his muffled groan vibrating through them both. And then his tension eased, slipping away as though it had never been. His mouth drifted across the top of her head in silent thanks before he released her.
The bouncing grew more frantic. “Aren’t you gonna pretend, too? You could pretend to be married and Mommy can be your wife and you can be the husban’ and I’ll be your little girl.”
Raven snatched his daughter off the couch, holding her high overhead. “You are my little girl, silly puss.”
Her bare feet thumped against his chest and he absorbed the kicks as though they were no more than a hail of snowflakes. “Come on, Daddy. Play the game. It’s fun.”
“You know I don’t play games very well.”
River sighed. “I know.” She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a fierce hug. “It’s okay. I still love you.”
His eyes closed. Emotions burst across his face leaving J.J. to feel as if she was the crassest of intruders. “I love you, too, baby.”
She bit down on her lip. She’d never had that. Never had a father who’d held her in his arms and professed his love. Never had a husband who cherished her above all others. Never had a daughter to hug whenever the spirit moved her. It was a fantasy as illusory and impractical as River’s wish. A dream she’d never experience.
Unexpected pain slashed her. “If you two will excuse me, I’ll go shower and dress,” she managed to say. “It won’t take me long.”
“And then we’re going shopping. Right, Daddy? ’Cuz fairies can’t go bare naked like in books. Not when they’re real people.”
Raven looked at J.J. over the top of his daughter’s head. His eyes were blacker than the belly of a coal mine. But even as she watched, a distant light flickered to life in the deep recesses. What had caused it? she wondered helplessly. River? Memories of his late wife? Or perhaps a backwash of emotions, emotions too long suppressed. Whichever it was, something had clearly drawn him from that dark, lifeless place.
“You sure?” he murmured. “I don’t mind having naked fairies flitting around the house.”
Years of training came to J.J.’s rescue. To her profound relief, not a hint of warmth tinged her cheeks. “Too bad,” she responded firmly. “This fairy will be wearing clothes.”
And with that, she exited the room before River came up with any more brilliant ideas. But on her way to the bathroom, J.J. made the most distressing discovery. Somehow, somewhere, an impossible fantasy had slipped past her defenses, despite the rigorous safeguards she’d put in place. And that sweet, sweet fantasy had stolen her heart. Tears slipped down her cheeks, and she touched them in bewilderment. She never cried, couldn’t recall the last time—
And then she remembered, remembered when she’d last felt the rain of tears on her face.
It had been the day she’d lost her mother. The day her fantasies had died.
Their shopping trip didn’t get under way for a couple of hours. Breakfast and several cups of restorative coffee came first. Then chores and a few business-related phone calls. By the time they arrived in the small town of Snow Run, it was late morning.
“Where would you like to begin?” Raven asked, parking across from a pretty little square consisting of a string of gift shops and boutiques.
; “How about there?” she replied promptly, pointing to a nearby clothing store. “Why don’t we meet up with you in an hour or so? I think this might be a girls-only errand.”
“You’ve forgotten one minor detail.”
She couldn’t mistake the deviltry in his black gaze. Suspicion seemed a justifiable reaction. “What?”
“I’m the one with the credit cards.”
“Not a problem.” J.J. offered a sweet smile. “I have my own plastic.”
“And you’d be welcome to use it, except—”
Uh-oh. “Except what?” she asked fatalistically.
“Since I’m the one keeping you here longer than anticipated, I’m the one springing for your purchases.” His words were as implacable as his expression.
“Mathias wouldn’t expect—”
Raven wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her into a loverlike embrace. He slid a hand deep into her hair, tilting her head so his mouth hovered mere inches above hers. River watched on, fascinated. “I’d like to make a suggestion, wife,” he said in a voice too low for anyone else to hear. “Don’t mention Blackstone to me. In case you didn’t notice last night, it has a really bad effect on my temper.”
“Daddy, are you going to kiss Mommy?” River questioned excitedly. “Are you going to play the game, too?”
His gaze shifted to her mouth and J.J. felt the breath shudder from between her lips. He must have felt it, too. “I’m tempted to find out if you taste as sweet as last time,” he murmured.
“Don’t get your hopes up,” J.J. said in as steady a voice as she could manage. “Or River’s, either. Remember? We’re not supposed to be encouraging her fantasies.”
“What about my fantasies?”
“I’m not here for you.” She didn’t mention Mathias, yet he might as well have been standing between them, his presence was that strong. “It’s River’s wish I’m fulfilling.”
“Attempting to be practical, sweetheart?”
“I am practical. I’ve had to be.”
“Time will tell.”
He pivoted in a quick half-circle, his back to his daughter, his shoulders eclipsing her view. His mouth consumed J.J.’s in a devastatingly brief caress, the touch a potent blend of passion and hunger. Her lips clung for a fleeting instant, responding with an ardency she couldn’t prevent. And then he released her.
“Tell me again how practical you are,” he had the nerve to tease.
“As practical as you, apparently.”
He grinned and she found it impossible to look away. It was a beautiful sight, his dark eyes brilliant with laughter, his face relaxed and open. For a wink of time the practical nature she’d been so certain she possessed deserted her. Impossible dreams seized her, offering tantalizing images of a life she’d secretly longed for since childhood. In that vision, Raven smiled at her all the time. He called her wife—and meant it—and River truly was their daughter.
The next moment, reality came crashing down. Dreams didn’t come true, she reminded herself furiously. At least not for people like her. Calling herself every type of fool, she turned from enchantment’s lure and held out her hand to River. “Come on, sweetheart. We have some serious shopping to do. And I’m going to need your help.”
“Hey, fairy lady.” Raven’s voice chased after her on chill autumn winds.
She paused, unable to respond, her throat far too tight for speech. Hell, she couldn’t even look at him.
He came up behind, dropping an arm around her shoulder. “Just so you know, you still taste as sweet as last time,” he said gently. “Maybe even a bit more.” And with that, he linked his fingers with hers, just as a real husband might.
The next few hours passed with amazing swiftness. Raven gave her a list of clothing she’d need while at the cabin—jeans, warm slacks, a down jacket, sweaters and a good dress.
“Oh, come on, Raven,” she said, protesting the final item on his list. “What do I need that for?”
“We’ll be going out to dinner at least one of the nights we’re at the cabin. You’ll need something dressy when we do.”
“Perhaps you and your daughter would like matching outfits,” the clerk suggested, no doubt sensing a nice, fat commission. “We have a number of lovely dresses to choose from.”
Before J.J. could kill the woman, River piped up, “Oh, Mommy, please?” She turned to Raven. “Can we, Daddy?”
JJ. half expected him to protest or show a hint of that ice-cold temper. Instead he stole her breath with a laugh. “An excellent idea.”
“All little girls love to play dress-up,” the clerk gushed. “And your daughter is an absolute miniature of your wife. Wait until you see. They’ll look darling.”
But this time J.J. put her foot down. “I think this is one outfit Daddy will have to miss previewing.” She stooped beside River. “How about if we pick out our dresses and save them as a surprise.”
Sure enough, the idea met with instant approval. “You can’t peek, Daddy,” River announced. “This is just for girls.”
He started to turn away, but not before J.J. caught an odd expression slipping across his face. It took her a second to recognize the emotion he so swiftly masked. Sorrow, she realized with a touch of compassion. Sorrow that River’s mother could never experience a moment like this with her daughter? It seemed likely. She pressed her lips together to keep them from trembling. Damn this wish! It had caused more trouble than it solved, baring vulnerabilities both of them had buried well and deep—painful memories neither wanted resurrected.
“Come on, Mommy. Let’s pick out our dresses,” River urged.
“Okay, sweetie.” J.J. ruffled her “daughter’s” hair. “What color are you in the mood for?”
Twenty minutes later, they’d completed their selection. The clerk quickly slipped the dresses into heavy black garment sacks. The rest of J.J.’s purchases had already been rung up and folded neatly into bags. Arms overflowing with purchases, the three returned to the Mercedes to stash everything in the trunk.
“Lunchtime,” Raven announced, slamming closed the lid. “There’s a café around the corner that has great burgers and salads. Why don’t we eat there?”
His suggestion met with an enthusiastic response. Fortunately wintertime tourists hadn’t yet descended on the tiny ski town and they were shown a table right away. To J.J.’s surprise, she found herself relaxing over the meal. “You’ve really done a great job with her,” she told Raven while River chattered with the waitress. “You should be very proud.”
“Love, luck and a lot of patience.”
“It couldn’t have been easy for you.”
“No. But I wasn’t totally on my own. My grandmother helped in the early days. She moved in with me and took care of River while I was at work.” He hesitated a moment, then added, “She died last year.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. Nawna had quite a life. And she was a very spiritual woman. Death wasn’t an ending for her, but a beginning.”
“Is that how you feel, too?”
“Sometimes.”
“And at others?” she asked softly.
“Other times I think we better deal with the here and now because that’s all we’re going to get.” His mouth pulled to one side. “Of course, I knew better than to express that sort of attitude around my grandmother.”
“I’ll bet she’d have given you an earful.”
“Without question.”
The waitress finished her conversation with River and offered to take their order. After settling on a Caesar salad, J.J. glanced up to discover a couple at another table watching them. They smiled in a friendly fashion. Then the woman whispered to her companion, tapping a section of the newspaper spread between them. The two focused on her again and their smiles grew. J.J. averted her gaze self-consciously. Uh-oh. Looked as though Raven’s announcement had hit the papers. She’d better make a point of snagging a copy before they returned to the cabin and see what had sparked their amu
sement.
Raven reached out and captured her hand. “I have one at home,” he said quietly.
Startled, she switched her attention to him. “What?”
“The announcement that couple’s smiling over,” he replied without glancing in their direction. “I have a copy at the cabin. Or rather, Gem can call one up on the monitor for you.”
“You noticed them looking at us?”
He shrugged. “You get used to it after a while.”
“I’m not sure I could,” she confessed in a troubled voice.
“Sometimes you don’t have any other choice.”
He hadn’t had any choice after his wife died. Notoriety had been thrust on him. And in response, he’d built up a tough defense, refusing to allow anyone to touch him, or more likely to touch his daughter. Anyone who dared, would face his unique brand of vengeance. She shivered. Too bad Mathias had put her in that exact position. By attempting to have her fulfill this particular Christmas wish, he’d placed her squarely between Raven and his daughter. And Raven would do anything—anything —to protect the little girl from harm.
The first time she’d seen him, she’d caught a glimpse of the noble warrior that was such an intrinsic part of his personality. The only thing that had protected the reporters from his wrath had been the presence of his daughter—just as the only thing that had protected her from the full force of his fury had been River’s intervention. J.J. could understand his feelings. If River were her daughter, she’d feel the same. But that knowledge brought home a disturbing truth.
Their battle hadn’t concluded. Far from it. It had merely been deferred until Raven determined whether or not she caused River any harm. And if she did...
The possibility haunted her through the rest of the meal.
The minute they returned to the cabin, J.J. carried her packages directly to the den. Raven had cleared out several desk drawers for her use, plus she’d discovered an empty closet where she could hang her new dress and jacket.
“Gem, are there any messages for me?” she questioned as she began removing her new wardrobe from the plastic bags and protective tissue.
The Miracle Wife (Harlequin Romance) Page 11