by D. C. Renee
“What? No … no way, you’re wrong.”
“I’m totally right, and you know it.”
“And what about the girl code?” she asked.
“What girl code?” I was confused.
“The one that states no friend will date a friend’s ex.”
“Have you or have you not been trying to get me to do that exact thing with Brent?” I pointed out.
“That’s different.”
“How?” I asked.
“Because they’re guys,” she said it like she was saying, “duh.”
“They probably have a bro code,” I retorted.
“Not happening.”
“You need to go for it,” I told her. “If I truly cared about some bullshit girl code, you know I’d tell you, but I just care about you being happy. And in this case, Travis gets to be happy, too. Give it a chance at least. Tell him you have my blessing if he protests. Tell him I want you both to have a chance at happiness, at real love.”
“Whoa … love. No one said anything about love.”
“I did, and I said ‘chance at love.’ You deserve a truly good guy, and Trav is a truly good guy. Go get him.”
“And what if he doesn’t like me?” she asked sounding unsure of herself.
“You’re hot and wonderful and amazing and any guy would give his left nut to be with you.”
“His left one, huh? Not the right?” She chuckled.
“Well, I guess if he were a righty, he would go with the left, but if he were a lefty, then maybe he’d give up his right one.”
We laughed, which we both needed. “Seriously, Lauren,” I started. “Tell him you like him and you want to see where things can go between you two. Fight for him if he starts protesting like you did.”
“Look who’s talking,” she snapped at me. “You can preach it, but you can’t follow your own sermon?” she asked. “I don’t see you going off and fighting for Brent.”
“Unlike you both, I don’t have Travis’ blessing,” I countered.
“You do,” I heard his voice before I saw him.
“Trav, what are you doing here?” I asked as Lauren and I turned to see him standing in the doorway.
“Sorry to just barge in,” he said hesitantly, “but you left your jacket in my car,” he said toward Lauren. “I just wanted to return it.” I gave Lauren a look that said, “See, I told you he likes you.” She nodded in acquiescence. “I knocked a couple of times, but you guys obviously didn’t hear me, but I heard you. Hope you don’t mind, the door was open, so I sort of walked in.” Shy Travis was absolutely adorable.
“Uh, yeah, that’s fine,” I responded.
“See?” Lauren said. “You have his blessing. Now go.”
I turned to see Travis nodding his head as if to say he agreed.
“You knew?” I asked him.
“Yeah,” he said sheepishly. “And it wasn’t fair of me to steal you away from him knowing how he felt. So tell him I’m sorry, will you?”
“Yeah,” I said because I was still way too stunned about the entire exchange.
“Go, Kim,” Lauren whispered when I gave her a quick hug goodbye.
“I’d wish you good luck too, but I know you don’t need it,” she said.
“I always need luck,” I told her.
“Well, then, good luck,” she said with a smile.
I hugged Travis too and whispered a thank-you as he held me tight before I dashed out. I had somewhere I needed to be.
chapter thirty-six
I made it to Brent’s place in record time. As I climbed the stairs to his apartment, I couldn’t help the feeling that I probably should have called first. What if he wasn’t home? Would I just sit and wait for him to come home? Yeah, probably, I reasoned. I stood in front of his door mumbling to myself, trying to figure out just what in the hell I was going to say to him. “Hey, so, now that Travis said we could, want to give it a go with your best friend’s ex?” just didn’t quite have the right ring to it. “Hey, turns out you can do this to Travis after all. He said so,” didn’t sound any better.
This was a bad idea, I told myself. Stupid Lauren and her meddling. Brent probably wasn’t home, and if he was, he probably didn’t want me anymore. A week was a long time in college years. He probably didn’t feel the same way about me anymore, which was why he was avoiding me. It’s not like you were reaching out to him either, my inner voice accused. That’s different, I responded to myself. I was chasing after a man who had told me we shouldn’t see each other. Suddenly, all of my bravado from earlier slipped away. I couldn’t do this. I sighed deeply and turned on my heel to leave without ever seeing Brent when his door freaking opened. You’d think someone was purposely messing with my emotions at the perfect timing of it. I turned, ready to say the first thing that came to my head.
“God, you’re beautiful,” I said with disgust as I took in the statuesque blonde woman standing before me. I did say I was ready to say the first thing that came to mind, and her damn perfect looks caught me off guard. She had the kind of beauty that was all natural, and her stupid, stupid hair probably looked that good right when she woke up. It was clearly an accusation on my part. The accusation for what, though, I had no clue. But dammit! Why did things always have to turn out as they did in books? This girl had just come out of Brent’s apartment, looking all model-like and as if she was ready to step out of the pages of a men’s dream-woman magazine. And here I was, flustered and nervous. And let’s not forget the fact that I had clearly missed my chance with Brent … if I ever even had one. What reason did she have to be in his room except to … you know … ugh! I couldn’t even think about what they were doing. I cursed Lauren in my head. Hell, I cursed the Barbie in front of me, too; I just hope I did it in my head.
“Uh, thank you?” she responded, confusion clearly marring her features.
And then, as if my life wasn’t enough of a comedic movie, the door opened with Brent in low-slung jeans, his glorious abs on display for me and Miss Universe to salivate for. “Wait, Jen, you forgot your cell and it keeps ringing,” he called out, not realizing that we were standing right outside his door in the female version of a Mexican standoff. You know the one where two girls narrow their eyes at each other and have a silent conversation that goes something like this:
I saw those abs before you ever knew they existed, my eyes said.
Yeah, well, I got to touch them, hers responded.
I technically did too, just maybe not the same way. Hey! Don’t get me off topic. I saw him first. Back off, bitch. I apparently got distracted by silent conversations as well. Dork through-and-through.
Let’s let him decide.
At least I was sure that was how it went, although Buxom Beauty was barely looking at me, bewilderment still shown in her eyes.
Brent finally looked up when Pretty Woman said, “Thanks.” Oh God, she even had a nice voice, all sing-songy and not whiny or high-pitched.
Brent’s eyes met mine, and I swore I saw a flash of regret. Damn straight he needed to feel regret. What was he doing having sleepovers with beautiful women when he should have known I was pining for him? And then not warning me before I came over to profess my undying love for him and making a fool of myself?
“Kim,” he spoke softly.
“Oh,” Cinderella spoke as if she knew it all. My eyes immediately snapped to hers. What in the hell did she know about me? “So you’re Kim. Oh, big brother, no wonder.” She chuckled and patted Brent on the cheek playfully.
“Wait, huh?” I spoke finally.
“She seems feisty.” Blondie spoke to Brent. “Maybe even a little jealous. I think that works for you.”
“Wait, brother?” The pieces finally formed into thoughts.
“Hi, I’m Jen, Brent’s little sis. I’m checking out the campus this weekend, so I’m staying here for a few days. But maybe I should continue on and meet my friends while you two figure out whatever the hell this sexual tension is. I love my brother and all, but
I don’t want to see him doing his thing,” she said as she wiggled her eyebrows. Ah, a fellow kindred dork spirit. I liked her already. “So nice to meet you. I’m sure I’ll be seeing you later. Bye.” She spoke a mile a minute, but I absolutely loved her as she bounced down the stairs. Now that I thought about it, I could see some similarities between her and Brent.
“I thought your sister was much younger,” I told Brent when I finally looked at him again, not sure what else to say.
“It’s because she’s still a kid to me.” He laughed lightly before getting serious. “So what’s up? What are you doing here? Everything okay?”
His concern was touching. Just another reason why I loved him “Yeah, no, I … oh, fuck it,” I said before I launched into his arms and kissed him. Words just wouldn’t do at that moment, not that I had any. I was too busy having an internal debate on what to say and staring at his fine body and luscious lips to have room for any rational thoughts. I must have rushed him pretty hard because I felt the, “Oomph,” leave his lips as his back hit the doorframe. I didn’t give him any time before my lips sought his; needy, wanting, greedy even. It had taken a moment before he responded, his tongue tracing my lips, asking me to part them and I did. God, the things he did to me. I couldn’t think about anything but the feel of his lips on mine, the desire coursing through me and how much time I had lost not doing this very thing.
“Oh God, Kim, I’m so sorry.” He spoke as we broke apart, and he pushed me away.
“You’re sorry?”
“I shouldn’t have done that.” He winced at his own words.
“I’m pretty sure I just bulldozed you,” I responded.
“Oh, stop, please, you can’t get funny on me now.” He chuckled. “Bulldozing, Kim, is for the bedroom.”
I put up my hand, “Okay, sorry, don’t need the details. I meant that I’m the one who attacked you.”
“Yes, but you’re vulnerable right now with your recent breakup. I should have stopped you instead of encouraging you.”
“It was a mistake,” I blurted out.
He cringed and then spoke slowly, “Well, all right, now that we’ve got that out of the way.”
“Oh, God,” I moaned. “I can’t do anything right. I didn’t mean this kiss was a mistake, I meant my relationship with Travis was, for both of us. We talked about it,” I started but was cut off by Brent.
“You talked about it? What?” he asked.
“Well, sort of. It was quick,” I responded as I tried to explain. “The gist is that Travis really likes Lauren. I’m pretty sure it was love at first sight actually, but I digress. He told me to tell you how I feel. He encouraged me to tell you that I … I love you, Brent.”
“You love me?” he asked almost reverently.
“I’ve loved you for a while, probably longer than I care to admit.”
“Oh no, please do share.” Brent smirked.
I smacked his arm playfully. Even in the middle of such a serious moment, Brent knew how to take the edge off. “I don’t want you to think you’re my second choice or anything. What Travis and I had … it was two people needing a connection, and friendship was mistaken for something else. The entire time …” I trailed off, feeling extremely guilty for what I was about to admit. “The entire time,” I repeated, “I felt like a horrible girlfriend because I couldn’t stop my thoughts from always wandering to you.”
“You love me?” Brent repeated his question from earlier like he still couldn’t believe my words.
“I love you,” I told him with a smile.
“And Travis?” he asked like he needed one last clarification.
“He knows how I feel, and maybe he knows how you feel?” I asked but didn’t wait for an answer. I hoped Brent still loved me, I really did, but if he didn’t, I didn’t want to know. I would just live in my rose-colored glasses bubble until I had to face reality. “He came by and told me not to hide my feelings from you. So … here I am … with Travis’ okay,” I added lamely.
I stood staring at him for a moment, my insecurities and self-doubt coming on fast. His lack of response was doing wonders to kill my hope. He was breathtaking, truly breathtaking, and not just because of his physical beauty, but also because I knew just how wonderful he was inside as well. I took the time to study him during the silence. I couldn’t read his expression, and that was hurting me. I needed to know how he was feeling, what he was thinking, because I wanted him. I wanted to be with him, to love him, to give him everything I had in me, but with each passing moment, I knew my dreams wouldn’t become a reality.
“Well … uh … now you know how I feel … I’ll just be going home now,” I said meekly, completely embarrassed that I’d thrown myself at him, but not regretting that I put myself out there, just hurt … and heartbroken. I turned to leave, but I didn’t even have a chance to take a step back. One minute, I was defeated, and the next, I was in his arms, his sweet, sweet lips devouring mine. Heaven. Nope, “double rocky road ice cream in heaven” heaven.
“Just like that?” I asked, breathing heavily when we parted.
“Just like that.” He smiled.
“You don’t have to talk to Trav or anything? You know that bros before hoes thing? Where you get his permission or something.”
“Done.”
“Huh?”
“He figured out how I felt about you a while ago, and when you guys broke up, he told me that if things happened between us, he’d be happy for us both. I brushed him off because I didn’t think you felt that way about me. And when things became weird between us, I took that as proof. I guess I was wrong.”
“Yeah, Brent, you were,” I responded. “Huh,” I said after a beat like I’d just discovered something.
“What?” he asked.
“I guess Travis saw what we couldn’t see.”
“Yeah, I guess he did,” he mused. He grabbed me, lifting me up and forcing me to wrap my legs around his body as he walked us inside and closed the door with his foot behind us.
“I love you,” Brent said as he walked us to his room.
“I know,” I teased. “But you can say it again if you want. I mean, it’s only fair since I’ve said it about a hundred times today already.”
“A hundred? More like twice.”
“Then I guess we both have some catching up to do,” I told him and kissed him.
“I love you,” he whispered against my lips.
“That’s more like it, my book boyfriend.” I chuckled as I pulled away to look into his eyes.
“What?” he asked.
“It’s always been you. My perfect book boyfriend, right in front of me, and I didn’t even realize it.”
“So I guess that means you’re my book girlfriend?”
“Yep.” I smiled. “And you know what that means?” I asked.
“What?”
“It means this is our happily ever after.”
“And more,” Brent added as he pushed me – very gently, of course - down on the bed.
Let’s just say that he and I had no issues with interruptions. And it was glorious. Absolutely, positively, mind-blowingly glorious. “I love that my life is a real-life book,” I told him as I lay in his arms, hopefully with a warm afterglow shadowing my features.
“Yeah, Kim, I love it, too. And I love you.”
epilogue
I stare at my husband. Yes, husband. I still haven’t gotten used to calling him that, but heck, it has only been two months since our wedding. He looks so handsome standing across from me in his three-piece suit. All eyes should have been on the bride and groom, but mine are attached to his, and his are glued right back on mine. Not to say that Lauren didn’t make a gorgeous bride and Travis didn’t make a fine looking groom. Hey, I was married, not dead. I could still tell that Travis was a looker. Lauren and Travis not only hit it off that day that Travis had stopped by to check on me, but they had gone the distance. And I’m sure you also figured out that Brent and I got hitched as well. Brent ha
d proposed a few months after we all graduated from college and landed some decent jobs. I guess that had gotten the fire lit under Travis’ butt because he told Brent the very next day that he was ready to make Lauren his as well. Brent and I even helped him pick out the ring, and he proposed a few weeks later. It was fun planning my wedding with my best friend. We joked on several occasions that we should just do a joint wedding, but in all honesty, every girl wanted her own special day.
Fortunately for Lauren, her proposal went a lot smoother than mine. Travis had proposed on the rooftop of our apartment building. Travis and Brent spent the entire day setting up the roof with lights and everything you needed for a romantic dinner for two at sunset. I was tasked with making sure Lauren was far away from the building until it was time to get ready. I think she knew something was up when I forced her to get all prettied up and then come up to the roof with me for some fresh air before we were supposed to meet up with the guys for dinner. What could I say – I wasn’t good with these things. But Travis asked and she said yes, and the rest was history for them. Me, however, not so effortless.
Brent told me that he was planning something romantic for my birthday, just the two of us, so I was prepared when he took me to dinner at a fancy restaurant. I was prepared when we went to a nearby park and he whipped out a blanket and fed me chocolate-covered strawberries and champagne. I was prepared when he drove us to a lookout spot where he could hold me in his arms as we looked at the twinkling lights of the city in front of us. I was not, however, prepared when he let go of me, my back no longer resting against his front, and said, “I think there is something down here.” He thought he was being smooth and finding a way to get down on one knee without me suspecting it. All I could think of, though, was whatever creature was about to attack us. “Don’t touch it,” I screamed and tried to scamper away. I ended up jumping from one foot to another in three-inch heels. I knew I looked hilarious. I was too busy staring at the floor, screaming that we needed to get out of there before a lion ate us. Mind you, I didn’t think there were any lions in a semi-residential area like that but try telling that to my brain at the time. So naturally, I didn’t even realize Brent had been on one knee, a ring in his hand and his lips were moving, telling me how much he loved me and how much he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. Of course, he was asking me to marry him. “Brent, we have to get out of here!” I yelled.