by Ines Saint
“I’ll be there,” Cassie said automatically. She was the only one her mother could talk to and trust. She was her mother’s best friend. Tomorrow, the world would come down on their heads.
Cassie’s thoughts became a whirl. How was her father holding up? Should she even care, considering what his past actions would put them all through? Would the news affect the Open Town event tomorrow? Could she juggle both a political scandal and a tour of homes? She had no answers.
Her mother swept into the lobby wearing dark jeans, a black blouse, and a blond wig. She looked so absolutely normal no one even looked at her twice. How her mother could think of—and come by—a wig during a crisis was something Cassie would never understand.
Her mother ignored her and got into the elevator. Cassie instinctively followed. As soon as the doors shut, her mother hissed, “Couldn’t you have worn a hat or something?”
Cassie closed her eyes. “You guys kept me off the campaign trail after I dropped out of college. That was ten years ago. No one remembers I exist, Mom.”
“They will tomorrow,” she said, her voice cracking. But she kept it together until Cassie opened the door to the room she’d booked. Sandy went straight to the bathroom to throw up. Cassie’s stomach clenched with anxiety.
For a long time, neither talked. It seemed there was nothing to say. They were staying in the type of luxurious, richly appointed suite her mother preferred, yet neither had noticed a single detail. In a few hours, they would wake up to their family’s biggest nightmare.
As Cassie looked out the window onto the world below and thought of political scandals past, she realized her mom was right. Tomorrow everyone would remember everything about their family. Her parents’ much publicized fairy-tale marriage, their only daughter, and their promises to the public.
A flash of anger stole through her. Her parents had done this to themselves, after all. Their addiction to the perfect image, to attention, and to the limelight had made them all vulnerable. The moment skeletons had hitched a tent in their closet, they should’ve quit.
In this age of twenty-four-hour news coverage, the story would go away soon enough, but the damage to her parents would remain.
“I don’t know what I’m going to do,” her mother said from the bed, where she had been leaning against the headboard and staring straight ahead for the past hour. “My parents, my friends, the constituents. . . everyone will be shocked. I don’t know how to face them. I don’t know how to spin it. I don’t know what to do.”
Cassie closed the curtain and bowed her head a moment, battling between empathy, anger, betrayal, and concern. She wanted to scream. Instead, she went to sit on the corner of the bed, doing her best to drown out the accusations in her head. “Tell them the truth,” she said.
Her mother’s face contorted into an angry mask. “What truth? That your father is a horny bastard who couldn’t keep it in his pants? That your old babysitter was a sneaky, backstabbing bitch? Can you believe it’s her new husband who’s now telling her to come clean, that she needs closure? As if she’s the victim.”
The flood of questions and accusations Cassie had managed to wall off throughout the years grew worse. The dam was buckling. But if there had ever been a wrong time to say everything she’d been holding back, this was it.
“I can’t face it now. We’ll need to go away for a while,” her mother said, a wild edge to her voice.
“You and Dad?” Cassie asked, incredulously.
“No!” Her mother looked at her as if she had rocks for brains. “You and me.”
“I think it’s a good idea for you to get away from it all, but I can’t go away with you now, Mom. I have a business to run.”
“You’re a Realtor, Cassidy. It’s not like you run a think tank.”
Cassie stared at her mom. Sandy had never come right out and said it like that, but deep inside, Cassie had known the way her parents felt.
It hit her then, forcefully, that what she’d chosen to do with her life would never be enough for either of her parents. Being number one in her chosen niche in the state of Ohio would always be silly and insignificant to them. She felt like a blind fool for ever even entertaining the idea that anything less than national domination and glowing credentials would be enough for them.
Her mother began to cry, and Cassie climbed across the bed to hold her, feeling like a fraud. Ten years ago, her heart had been full of concern and empathy for her mother. But now all she could conjure up was a tight knot of resentment.
Her phone rang. “It’s Dad,” she said and moved to answer.
“You’re going to talk to him?” her mother demanded.
Cassie snapped. She’d never wanted to see it before, had felt shame every time the thought had crept in, but anger that wouldn’t go away would not allow her to deny it. Her mother’s empathy switch defaulted to self-absorbed and people like Cassie enabled it to remain that way. “He’s my dad. Please stop forgetting that,” she said through gritted teeth, before picking up the phone and heading to the room’s balcony.
“Are you with your mom?” her father asked without ceremony.
“Yes.”
“Good. She needs you right now.” A long silence ensued. “I’m sorry,” he said after a while, and Cassie could hear the lump in his throat. With the exception of one all-out screaming match in which she’d informed her father she’d dropped out of college and he’d accused her of doing it to punish him, they’d never talked about the affair. It was too awkward.
Their relationship during the years since had gone from cold and civil to a quiet acceptance. They spoke often, never saying anything important and no longer agreeing on much, but with a knowledge of loving each other just the same. The one thing Cassie could never get past was why her parents hadn’t quit while they were ahead. They had to have known her father’s affair with their secretary’s daughter and Cassie’s onetime babysitter would haunt them sooner or later.
“I know, Dad,” she said on a sigh.
“Thanks for that, princess. Hide out with her for a while, will you?”
Cassie closed her eyes. “I can’t hide out for long. I’m almost thirty years old, and I have a life and responsibilities.”
“Now’s not the time. You need to lie low until it all blows over. It’s for your own sake. Your own failures will be magnified now, too, and God knows I’m sorry for it, but it is what it is and we have to weather the storm.”
Cassie counted to ten and waded through everything she wanted to say. “I agree we all have to weather the storm, but I’m not a failure and I’ve done nothing wrong. I don’t need to hide out.”
“That’s not what I meant, Cass. Don’t take it that way. You know how the world works and how people perceive things. All I meant is that they’ll go after you, too.”
“That’s how your world works, Dad. That’s why I’m not a part of it. And it’s why you should’ve seen this coming and dropped out of the public’s eye years ago.” Cassie clicked off the phone before remorse and guilt took over.
Back inside, her mother looked years older than when Cassie had left, only five minutes before. She was staring at the TV with dull eyes.
When Cassie looked over at the television, she understood. It was 2 a.m. The story was beginning to get picked up by the networks. Sandy had muted the television, so they couldn’t hear what anyone was saying, but at the bottom of the screen, the headline was clear: “Breaking News: Senator McGillicuddy Affair with Daughter’s Babysitter Revealed.”
Cassie thought her mother would be spitting furious words when it finally happened, but she looked too dead inside to feel anything. “Was it ever real?” her mother asked, as images of her and her dad throughout the years flashed across the screen.
Cassie sat next to her mom and took her limp hand in her own. “Do you—do you remember falling in love?” she asked, not sure it was the right thing to ask.
Her mother shook her head. “I don’t know. I remember being as dazzled by him
as I was by me. That had never happened before. I remember seeing our future so clearly after I met him. I knew we could go far.”
Cassie stared at her mother. She’d never heard such candor from her before. “You were . . . dazzled by yourself?”
“I was.” Sandy sighed. “I’d always stood out. I felt beautiful and smart and I knew my worth. I also knew that could rub people the wrong way. But Max . . . he was a people person. He had it all, and he looked genuine to boot.” She nodded toward the television and said, “And I saw that future. I don’t think I knew what love really was until I had you, though.”
Pictures of Brittany walking around Washington with Cassie, the two of them holding hands and eating ice cream, popped onto the screen and Cassie averted her eyes. She had loved and trusted Brittany like a sister. It still hurt, and she was tired of hurting.
“And now the life we worked so hard to build is gone. And in their eyes, we’re all nothing but frauds.” Her mom turned her face to the side and began crying and Cassie scooted closer. How could her mom not see it had been her choice to stay? To stand beside her father as he ran for office again and again?
Her mom’s phone rang, and she looked down at it. “It’s your father,” she breathed out. “You answer it.”
Cassie answered and listened stoically, though inside she spiraled further into confusion. She covered the receiver’s microphone with her finger. “Dad wants to know if we can all meet. They’re wondering where you two are, why you haven’t released a statement, and they’re digging up the fact that I dropped out of college ten years ago and making the connection.”
“They’re blaming us for that, too?” Her mom’s voice wobbled.
Cassie closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths. “Can we meet with Dad or not? Jim Carney is saying we need to present a united front.”
“He hired Jim Carney?” her mom asked, repeating the name of a DC public relations guru. “Smart. That’s a first,” she said, her bitter tone back.
“Mom? They’re waiting.”
Sandy sighed. “I suppose we must.”
Cassie set up a meeting, wondering if her parents would stay together or call it quits. Thoughts that would have devastated her years before now rolled off her. She was as numb as her mother looked.
All she could think about was snuggling back into the cocoon she’d built for herself. It had been missing a layer, but ever since she’d been back in Spinning Hills, it was feeling more complete. Her parents had built a fish tank life, and she could not allow herself to be pulled back into it.
They decided to meet right there in that room, since the hotel staff had so far been either clueless or discreet. As her mom got ready, Cassie went over her options in her head, and the only one that worked for her was staying 100 percent out of it. Not releasing a statement, not saying a word. Not even a plea for privacy. People would get tired of her soon enough. She wasn’t the real story. And even the real story would eventually be replaced.
When she looked up, she saw her mother watching her. “If I stay here any longer I’ll go mad, Cassidy. You and I should take a long vacation to somewhere far away. Italy, maybe. What do you think? Just the two of us. We can leave this all behind and come back when the next congressman caught with his pants down makes the news.”
Cassie shook her head. “I already told you, Mom. I can’t.”
Sandy lay on her side and stared catatonically at the night table beside her, tears streaming down her face. Cassie got into bed beside her mom and hugged her, the way she had ten years ago when Janice, her dad’s secretary, had first come to her mom with her suspicions of an affair between Senator McGillicuddy and her twenty-five-year-old daughter, Brittany, who had been Cassie’s longtime babysitter.
It was almost as if they had gone back in time. The difference was that Cassie had changed. Where once she’d felt fiercely protective of her mom and angry and disappointed in her dad, she now had complicated feelings for both parents.
It had taken her years to realize that her mother’s reliance on her had been unfair and wrong. That the whole thing had caused her to spiral into a depression. At the time, she’d thought she was being a good daughter by being there. Her mom’s anguish had felt like her struggle and responsibility, too.
At first, Cassie had been determined to prove Janice was wrong and that it was all a misunderstanding. From there, everything had somehow snowballed into Sandy pulling Cassie out of class countless times to have her follow her dad to see where he was going. Sandy had even pleaded with Cassie to follow her dad throughout Washington, convincing her that because of their very public lives, Cassie was the only one she could turn to and count on.
Her mother had even bought her a wig. Cassie shook her head, remembering the madness of it all. What she’d thought of as surviving by taking it day by day had really been a fight against the sadness and desperation engulfing her.
Sandy and Cassie had pored through her dad’s cell phone records, receipts, and accounts, until they’d finally had to face the truth. It had been the worst day of Cassie’s life.
The following months were filled with chaos between her parents, both of them bad-mouthing each other to her, and Cassie coming to terms with the fact that her parents’ marriage and her dad’s image was an illusion. It had taken her longer to see her mother’s image was an illusion, too.
The truth dawned on her the day her parents found out she’d dropped out of college. She’d missed too many days and too many tests because of holing up with her mom and chasing her dad around Columbus and Washington, and she didn’t have the tools and habits to weather it. Her parents had united once again, to rail against her for embarrassing them that way. They’d named other politicians’ children and their Ivy League schools and powerful careers and Cassie came up short in every way.
The idea that they might have had something to do with her struggles didn’t even cross their minds. They had too much at stake in the image game to see past the smoke and mirrors they themselves had created. They viewed everything through the warped lens of how things looked to others. It had made Cassie realize she had to live her life on her own terms.
And now, there she was again, twisting and turning next to her mom, while resentment, anger, worry, and sadness took turns pummeling her. The last time she looked at her phone, it was 4:36 a.m., her eyes were stinging, her head was pounding, and her phone’s battery was nearly dead.
But she couldn’t help it. She clicked her phone’s news icon and read a few headlines.
Brittany’s mom was alleging that Senator McGillicuddy had carried on numerous affairs, that his marriage was a sham, and that Sandy McGillicuddy had threatened to ruin Brittany if she ever spoke to the media.
And Cassie knew then she’d never know the full truth.
Chapter 12
Sam, Dan, Johnny, Holly, and Emily waited. And waited. Every once in a while, someone would look down at their watch. They’d agreed to meet Cassie at her office at ten o’clock that Sunday. When she was half an hour late, Holly called and left her a message. When they didn’t hear back, they agreed to continue with their own plans and tasks and meet an hour later.
An hour later, no one had heard from Cassie. They began taking turns leaving her messages.
“This isn’t like her,” Johnny said. “Something must be holding her up.”
“Yes, but she has the fliers we’re supposed to distribute to each house, the one with the listings and the one with information about the community,” Holly said.
Dan looked over at Sam. “She’s also supposed to be setting up at each of the houses she’s listing.”
Sam silently raged. No, it wasn’t like the Cassie any of them knew. But it was like that Cassie who had disappeared on him numerous times years ago, for no given reason and without thought for consequences.
It made no sense.
Jenna Woods came up to them then. “Hey, everyone,” she greeted, her tone pleasant but purposeful. “I just visited a few busine
sses, but no one has the newsletter-like flier Cassie was talking about. I wanted to see how my article on the PTA turned out.”
Emily smiled brightly. “She’s been held up, but everything will be ready on time.”
Jenna didn’t look like she quite believed her, but to her credit, her smile didn’t falter. “All right. I’ll try again later,” she said, and headed up the street toward the park, where Tess Carpenter was most likely already decorating for her daughter’s birthday party. A party Jake had been invited to at the very last minute. Sam guessed Tess had been talked into it by the other moms, who were trying to work with them at Cassie’s behest. And Cassie was now MIA.
Sam headed up the street, too, to his office. Cassie had six of his listings, and she’d gone on and on about how she was going to bake vanilla sugar cookies in each house so they’d have that warm, lived-in smell, and how she’d have samples of the region’s best brownies, chocolates, coffee, and hot cocoa set out on each counter. All that took time, didn’t it? Where the hell was she?
He needed an offer on at least two homes soon, so he could close on them and have money in the bank before next month’s mortgage payments. He called, she didn’t pick up, and he hung up on the tone.
He sighed, slouched against his desk, and looked at the calendar on his wall. Due dates were circled in different colors. It wasn’t just his business that was at stake. Child support was due soon. Jake’s soccer cleats were getting tight, new team uniforms had been ordered, Jake’s teeth were going to need braces . . . Sam shot up and called Cassie again.
With every unanswered ring, his frustration mounted, and thinking on Jake’s uniforms had him remembering the one time he was the only guy on his college team without his. The way he was chewed out in front of his teammates after they lost. Getting suspended for violating the rules.