I heard Jessie talking. “I don’t know what else to do. It’s been three days. Why isn’t she responding?”
“I don’t know. Look, I need to get out of here. Miranda hasn’t talked to me in days. She thinks I’m making a mistake. Van’s husband is on his way to pick her up since she stayed a couple days later. I need to be there when he arrives.”
“Ty, thanks again. I don’t think you’re as much of a dick as I did before. Heather would appreciate you coming.”
“I just thought I’d give it a try. I mean, she hates me more than anyone. If she won’t wake up for love, I figured hate might work.”
They both laughed and the room got quiet. I didn’t want them to leave me, even if they weren’t even really there. “I keep thinking my phone is going to ring and you’ll be on the other end asking to talk to Jacob. He misses us, you know. I haven’t left your side for three days. Amy keeps bringing me food. It’s funny. Before we came here, I thought they were all horrible people. It turns out that they are pretty cool. Even Ty is doing his best in light of the situation. It’s happening and you’re missing it. They’re letting go of the past. Isn’t this what you’ve dreamed about?”
It was.
Too bad it wasn’t real.
My mind was playing tricks on me.
“Heather, I need you. Things will be different. I won’t walk away from you again, I promise. Just wake up for me.”
I tried again to reach out to him, but nothing happened. The room got silent and I was all alone again. Inside I was screaming out for Jessie, but he couldn’t hear me.
Chapter 22
Jessie
It was difficult for me to have to make the decision to go home and make arrangements for Jacob. Luckily, my sister offered to take him and let me stay at her place, while I waited for Heather to wake up. I didn’t care how long it took, I was going to wait and prove to her that she could count on me. I was going to fight for her, like she’d always wanted me to do.
It was weird how I’d gone for months and not been near Heather, but this accident had made me not want to be away from her. I missed the way she smelled when she came out of the shower and put lotion on her legs. I missed how when she got mad at me, she’d pretend she wasn’t, or how she’d cook something that was delicious and swear that we were lying when we said we loved it.
I wanted all of that back in my life. I wanted the little details that drove me crazy. I wanted to be the woman that drove me crazy; the woman that gave me life’s greatest gift.
Leaving the hospital, for even a day, was hard. I felt like as soon as I walked away she was going to wake up or something bad was going to happen. It was a good thing that I had a son that I missed like crazy. He’d been spoiled for a coupled days, but knew something was wrong.
I had to take him home and sit him down before I could tell him about his mother. He sat there, with his hands folded, waiting for me to tell him.
“Buddy, Mommy’s been in an accident and she’s at the hospital.”
“Can we go see her?”
I shook my head. “They don’t allow kids in the part of the hospital they are keeping her. I wish you could come. I know she’d like to hear your voice.”
“Let’s just call her.”
I got on my knees on the floor and faced him. My hands cupped his knees. “We can’t call her, because she’s sleeping.”
“We can wait until she wakes up.” He looked at me like I was an idiot for not figuring that out.
“Mommy isn’t sleeping like you and I do when we go to bed. She has a head injury and she can’t wake up yet.”
“Did you try to scream? Mommy wakes up when I’m loud.” His response was well thought, but he still wasn’t getting it.
“I tried to scream. I even invited people that know Mommy to come and talk to her. She still won’t open her eyes.”
He talked in almost a whisper. “Is she going to die like Nana?”
I didn’t know how to answer that. As much as I wanted to believe that Heather was going to be okay, she still hadn’t opened her eyes or reacted at all.
“Jacob, I’m not going to lie to you. You’re a big boy and you deserve to know the truth. I don’t know if Mommy is going to get better. I want her to wake up, but I just don’t know if she will.”
He started to cry and I pulled him into my arms. “I’m sorry, buddy. I know it sucks. We just have to pray. Daddy is doing everything I can think of. I need you to be the strongest boy you can be right now.”
He pulled away and looked right at me with tears running down his face. “I don’t want Mommy to die.” His lips quivered and I felt like bawling myself.
It was too much to take. “I don’t want her to die either.”
“What can we do? How do we make her get better?” Bless his little heart for wanting to do whatever it took to help his mother.
“For starters, we can head to your aunt Krista’s house. She lives close to where Mommy is in the hospital and that way Daddy can be there in case she wakes up.” Jacob only saw Krista twice a year, so I knew he wasn’t thrilled about staying under her care. I didn’t have a choice. Being without him to care for Heather wasn’t an option. I needed him close to me, no matter what happened.
“When can we go?”
I patted him on the head and leaned over to kiss him. “We need to get your things together and tell Grandma and Grandpa goodbye. Then we are going to fly in an airplane. How does that sound?”
My son’s eyes lit up. “Really? We get to fly in a plane?”
“Yep!” At least he had something to be excited about. I had no idea what I was going to say to my son if his mother didn’t make it through this. Somewhere down the road, he was going to figure out that us leaving was the reason that all of this had happened. I feared that conversation.
It just so happened that the airplane ride kept Jacob from asking any questions about his mother. As much as I wanted to keep him in the loop, he was only five, so it just wasn’t going to be anything he could understand.
My sister was over the moon about keeping him. I didn’t have time to stick around and catch up, but she walked me outside to give me her personal opinion. “Jess, what are you going to do?”
“What do you think I’m going to do? She’s the mother of my son. I’m not just going to leave her there all alone. I love her, no matter what anyone else thinks about it.” I hated arguing with Krista. It just was weird since we weren’t really on that kind of level with our relationship. I guess our good ole dad had messed her up so bad that she trusted nobody. Plus, I had badmouthed Heather so much that it was natural for my family and friends to hate her. Now, I hated myself for doing it.
She waved her hands around as she talked. “Whatever! Jacob is safe here. We’re going to take him to the movies tomorrow. The key is under the mat for whenever you need to come in and shower.”
I hugged her. “Thanks for this, Kris. I owe you big time.”
I knew she was rolling her eyes, but I’d already turned and started walking to the car. She wasn’t cool about me borrowing it, but since she wasn’t working for the next couple of days, she didn’t really need it.
After a couple of days, I was getting used to the sounds in the hospital. Nothing had changed as far as Heather’s condition, except the color of the bruising on her face. What started as red was now a dark purple.
She looked so peaceful each day as I sat there with her. Once Van headed back to town, I was the only visitor that showed up. It was fine by me, since I was sick of having to explain myself to my family, who didn’t understand why I’d had a change of heart all of the sudden.
For what it was worth, I hadn’t hid my feelings for Heather. They all knew that I loved her. They just knew that I had personal issues I couldn’t get over. With everything that had happened, the loss of her mother, and now the accident; I knew I couldn’t turn my back on her, not now, not ever.
Each day the doctor and nurses would come in and check her progress.
I knew that with each day that passed it was less likely a chance that she was going to wake up. Sure, I’d heard all about Ty Mitchell and how he miraculously woke up from a coma after seven months. For it to happen to Heather would have been a miracle, but I couldn’t see being hopeful. I knew the statistics. For days, I’d sat in the hospital room looking up everything I possibly could.
Most of my research resulted in varied scenarios for her recovering. I didn’t care how Heather woke up. I just wanted it to happen.
When afternoon came and went, I walked down to the cafeteria to grab something to eat before they closed for the night. The vending machine didn’t have that much of a selection.
I’d just paid for my food and starting looking for the condiments when a little boy came up to me and punched me in the side. “Hey, Mister! I know you!”
I recognized the kid right away, and unfortunately, I recognized his mother, too. She came up and grabbed the back of his shirt. “Jax, get your butt back over here!” When she noticed me, she stood still and looked right at me.
I could tell she didn’t know what to say. “Sorry, I was just getting something to eat.” Without saying anything else, I walked over to a table and started eating. She followed me and sat down across from me, while Jax stood there beside her.
“You think I’m the bad guy, don’t you?”
It shocked me that she would come out and say that. “No!”
“I almost lost my children.” She looked over at Jax.
I sat my fork down and looked right at her. “I’m not here to judge you. I’m here because my girlfriend was in a terrible accident a few days ago.” I pointed to her son. “I don’t know why you’re here and I hope that everyone in your family is okay, but I can’t do this right now. Heather is fighting for her life. She has a son that needs her.”
I picked up my tray and started to get up, but she grabbed it. “Wait! I’m not a bad person.”
“Look lady, I appreciate you trying to find the words, but I need to get back upstairs. She’s going to wake up and I need to be there when she does.” I walked away from Ty’s wife without even asking about why she was in the hospital. It wasn’t my business and I really didn’t care.
I was happy to make it to the elevator and take my first full breath. I was still holding a tray of food, but had lost my appetite and had no interest in eating anything for the rest of the night. This town was too small and I got how Heather felt suffocated being in it.
As much as I thought she’d want to keep her house, I understood why she didn’t. Who would want to run into that family and be reminded of something that you didn’t want to remember all the time? I know I wouldn’t have.
Maybe I was being irrational about the whole situation given my lack of sleep, but I was starting to understand why Heather would be okay with walking away and never coming back. Something felt wrong about it though. Her mother’s house was the only tie she still had to her. I didn’t want her to lose that.
I don’t know why the thought ran through my head, but as the elevator opened all of my thoughts disappeared.
When I arrived up to the floor Heather was on, I heard loud beeping and dashed towards her room. The nurses were running inside and I wedged my way in with them. I feared the worst as I approached where I could see what was going on.
My mouth dropped when I saw Heather’s eyes open. She had tried to sit up and the cord on her finger had fallen off. A few seconds later, the beeping slowed and I couldn’t take my eyes off of hers. She was looking right at me and I wanted her to know that I wasn’t going anywhere.
Chapter 23
Heather
I don’t know how I willed myself to open to my eyes, but it finally happened. Just like when I was dreaming, Jessie was there, looking at me with a big smile on his face. I tried to smile back, but that was too hard to do with a big mask across my face.
While the medical people did whatever they had to do to me, I kept looking at Jessie. I saw hope in his eyes and didn’t want to look away in case it wasn’t real. I still couldn’t remember how I’d gotten in the hospital, but Jessie was with me and that was all I cared about.
He looked tired, standing there with his arms crossed. Maybe he had been up all night worried about me. I wondered where Jacob was and immediately started to worry that something bad had happened to him. My heart rate jumped up and I’d created a new reason for the nurses to stick around.
Once that all settled and they’d pumped me full of clonazepam, I was left in the room with only Jessie. He walked over to my bed and grabbed my hand. “Hey. I was starting to think you weren’t going to wake up.”
Talking was hard since my mouth was so dry. He handed me a cup with a straw and I took a sip of water before being able to continue. “How did I get here?”
Jessie shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. All that matters is that you’re going to get out of here and come home with me, where you belong.”
It was almost surreal to hear him saying that. I wanted to smile and celebrate, but instead I tried to reach for his hand, realizing that my arm was in a cast. “What’s wrong with me?”
He touched my cast. “You broke your arm, part of your neck and dislocated your hip. You had a contusion on your head and that’s why you were bandaged up. Are you okay? Does anything hurt?”
I felt his hand grabbing mine and I squeezed it. “I can’t move, but I guess it because all of this shit they have on me.” My neck brace was this giant collar. I hated it immediately. “When can I go home?”
“I don’t know. Maybe a couple of days.”
“How long have I been in here. You look tired.”
Jessie shrugged. “You’ve been here a few days. This chair isn’t the most comfortable thing to sleep in.”
I couldn’t turn my head that far to see the chair, but from working in a hospital, I could imagine what it looked like. “Jacob?” I just wanted to know he was alright.
“He’s at my sister’s. He got to fly on a plane with me to come here. You should have seen how excited he was. The pilot showed him around the cockpit after we landed. I think he wants to be a pilot now.”
If Jessie had to fly to be with me, that meant that he’d left already, just as I remembered. Whatever happened to me occurred after they’d left. As upset as I was, I couldn’t imagine inflicting any harm on myself. Something horrible must have happened. “I need to know how I got here. How did you find out I was in the hospital?”
He looked away from me and cleared his throat. “You really don’t remember?”
I tried to shake my head, but it was impossible. “No! I don’t remember anything.” I could tell that he didn’t want to talk about it, but I had every right to know how I’d gotten myself so messed up.
“After Jacob and I left, you must have lost it and started drinking.”
This was already not sounding like me. “I didn’t have enough wine to make me drunk. You have to be mistaken. Who said I was drinking? Did I fall down the steps?”
Jessie shook his head. He reached up and rubbed my cheek through my awful brace. “Heather, you were in a car accident. Baby, you got drunk and drove to the Mitchell farm.
My eyes must have come flailing out of my head. “I what? Are you joking with me, right now?”
“No, baby, I’m not! Jacob and I stopped at a motel. We tried calling you over and over again and you wouldn’t answer. When I ran out of options, I called Amy’s shop and was going to ask them to go and check on you. I had no idea that they’d been with you and knew where you were.”
I was in shock and still unable to remember anything after Jessie leaving me. What was wrong with me? Why would I even consider doing something so stupid? “Oh God, did I hurt anyone?”
“Only yourself.”
I was so relieved that I hadn’t hurt anyone. If that had happened again, I wouldn’t have been able to forgive myself. “Did I damage their property?”
“You totaled your mother’s car.”
I was scared to ask. “What did I hit?”
“You pulled out onto the road in front of a tractor trailer. He hit you on the driver’s side and sent your car out into a field.”
I still couldn’t remember anything. It was as if he was telling me some sick joke to get a rise out of me, except his demeanor never changed. He stood there straight faced explaining the actions of how I’d gotten in the hospital. “Was the driver hurt?”
“Apparently he walked away from it. Even his truck wasn’t badly damaged. I think Amy said that he just needed some bumper repair.”
“I was drunk?” I still couldn’t believe it.
“I’m afraid so.”
Then it hit me. “You came back for me?”
He nodded. “Jacob and I turned around that night. We slept at a hotel and drove back in the morning. Your mom’s house was dark and the car was gone, so I thought you went home to find us. It wasn’t until we were home that we found out what happened. Conner was nice enough to meet me at the airport and bring me here. They all feel bad about what happened.”
“What do you mean?”
He chuckled and it made me nervous. What could I have done to that family? “After you drank yourself into a stupor, you drove your mother’s car to the farm. I don’t know how it is set up. But they were all out in some barn. You barged in and gave them a piece of your mind. Ty said he tried to talk to you, but you weren’t hearing it. You got mad and flew down the lane, where you pulled out onto the road and had your accident.”
I was in shock, partly because I’d had the nerve to do something so bold and also because I couldn’t remember any of it. “I don’t recall anything after you left, Jess. I don’t remember any of it.”
“You were wearing the wedding dress.” He didn’t say it like it was funny. He said it like it was going to help me remember.
“No way. I wouldn’t do that. My mother worked so hard on it.” I was in shock.
Losing Him (Mitchell Family Series Book 8) Page 13