by L. C. Mawson
“Yeah, well, I never said she was perfect. But I guess she’s family. Probably the only family I’ll know.”
But Freya’s thoughts were far from her words, as her traitorous mind reminded her that, when she had returned home after the reset, it had seemed as if Amber had known something.
Did the reset work on ghosts, or did she know everything that had happened and was keeping it from her?
Freya let out frustrated sigh as she clamped down on the returning feelings of betrayal.
“Why would you try and push me to hate her?” Freya hissed at Alice. “The last time I let myself get mad at Amber, I banished her from this realm and almost died.”
“I know. And you’ve been letting your fear of losing your safety net stop you from confronting her. You know that she bends the truth to her own ends. You know that she’s been hiding your father from you, but you can’t confront her.”
“So why would you push me? What if I banish her again? Permanently, this time?”
“Because you’re no longer alone,” Alice told her. “Amber isn’t your only access to the magical world anymore. You don’t have to rely solely on her.”
“You said that I should trust you, but why? Peter said that Fate would use me as a pawn in her plan. If you’re working with her...”
“Fate uses everyone in her plan. Literally everyone. It’s a nonsense question. Be paranoid if you want, but it won’t change anything.”
“Do you know what my part in the plan is?”
“Yes.”
“Can you tell me?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because telling you would change the outcome.”
Freya narrowed her eyes. “This is what your whole cryptic thing is about, isn’t it?”
“I can’t answer that.”
“That’s a yes.”
“I can neither confirm nor deny that.”
“Can you answer anything?”
Alice smiled. “I can tell you that you will get your answers, I just can’t act as your cheat-sheet and give you them now.”
“Can you tell me who my father is?”
“No. And you not knowing at this point is entirely down to you.”
“More stuff I can’t remember?”
“Yeah.”
“Damn... How weird were those few days?”
“Extremely.”
FREYA RODE FOR AS LONG as she could, wanting to put as much distance between her and Damon as possible before resting. She didn’t want to risk being tempted to return. Or risk Damon being tempted to follow her.
But, a while after dark, Freya stopped for the night. She didn’t want to push her horse too far, or risk injury on the dark road.
She made camp in the woods. She couldn’t make use of the inns when she was still so close to home. Too many people who could recognise their queen.
As she lay down her blanket, however, she heard a rustling sound close by. She lit her palm in flame to give her a better look at the surrounding area. Shadows shifted at the edge of her vision, and she spun around to see a cloaked figure approaching.
“Who are you?” Freya demanded, letting the fire flare threateningly.
“Relax,” the figure said, lowering her hood. “It’s only me.”
“Seph,” Freya greeted, once she recognised her adviser. “If you’re here to convince me to go home, don’t waste your time. I can’t do any good back there.”
“I know. I’m not here to bring you home, but it’s dangerous to go alone. And you still have much to learn of ruling. If you ever intend to return one day, you need to continue learning. And, for that, you need a teacher.”
Freya sighed. “I suppose you’re right, but I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to go back.”
“Because your counterpart gave up her memories?”
“I... How did you know?”
“Because my counterpart knew that she would. She knew that no one would remember, so she synced up our memories. We’re not connected in the same way you are with your counterpart, but I think, in time, I can help you guide her home.”
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Freya had never been held back after class before. Well, with the exception of times when Amber had used her guise as Ms Pearson to teach her magic. But Ms Pearson had been dead for a while now, leaving Amber with only her ghost form.
“Do you have a lesson now?” Dr Harris asked her as she rolled up the sleeves of her lab coat.
“No, I have a free,” Freya replied, doing her best to not tap her fingers against the desk. “Why did you want to see me?”
“It’s about your last practice paper.” She passed Freya the chemistry practice paper that she had done the week before. Freya’s eyes were glued to the large B on the front.
No matter how hard she pushed herself, Bs had become an all too common occurrence.
“Was it a high B?” Freya asked. “Just, you know, a few marks from an A?”
Dr Harris shook her head. “You barely scraped it.”
“Ah.”
“Freya, I’m concerned. I know you can do better. You did better for years. Your university choices won’t take you with a B in the subject you want to study.”
Freya groaned. “I would have chosen maths if the requirements weren’t even higher. Plus, Margaret is determined that I do a professional degree.”
“Is everything okay at home? Is that why your grades are slipping?”
Freya shook her head. “No. It’s fine. Great, actually. Amy’s sleeping through the night now, so I’m not even having to stay out as much.” Freya shut her mouth promptly as she realised that she probably shouldn’t have said that. She knew that her nights spent hunting Demons probably weren’t helping her grades, but that wasn’t something her teacher could help her with.
Dr Harris sighed. “Home life isn’t exactly my area of expertise.” She opened the paper to the first page, showing various red scribbles, followed by a 0 at the end of the page. “This is.”
“I... Why are these questions even on the test?” Freya asked before pointing to the third one. “This one isn’t even chemistry, it’s international diplomacy. That one’s history. I understand that there’s context around the science, but it’s only the science I’m good at.”
Dr Harris nodded. “Oh, you don’t have to tell me.” She moved to the essay question at the end of the paper. Full marks. “Your marks don’t make sense, Freya. You’re falling behind kids who aren’t half as good as you are.”
“I... I don’t know how to fix that.”
“Freya, I want you to speak with Ms Wood.”
“Ms Wood?” She frowned. “Doesn’t she work in student support?”
“Freya, I don’t know how to explain your grades. To say they’re inconsistent is an understatement. I also dug up the IQ test the school had you take in Year 10. Your results were all over the place.”
“What does that mean?”
Dr Harris shrugged. “I’m not sure, but it would suggest to me that you might have some kind of learning difficulty. Maybe dyslexia, since you find the maths questions easier.”
“Or autism,” Freya said quietly.
Dr Harris raised an eyebrow.
“My sister is autistic. Well, not my biological sister. But she... We... I’ve known for a while. Talked with some other autistic people online and did some research.”
“And you’ve never pursued a diagnosis?”
“I... I just got adopted this past year. I had a hard enough time getting fostered without the stigma. How would a diagnosis help, anyway? It wouldn’t make the questions any clearer.”
“No, but you could get more time in exams, and some of the universities might accept you if you have an explanation for your grades. You would probably fare better with university work anyway.”
“Probably,” Freya agreed. “As long as they don’t ask me irrelevant questions about the Kyoto Protocols.”
“You’ll have t
o see Ms Wood and talk to her about getting a diagnosis.”
“I... I should probably talk to my fo- my parents about it first. Get their permission and all that.”
Dr Harris nodded. “Alright, if you think so. Though, depending on how you think they might react, getting some information from Ms Wood might be helpful. I think she’s in her office for the rest of the afternoon.”
“Okay, you might be right. I’ll go see her.”
FREYA LET OUT A FRUSTRATED groan as she collapsed onto one of the sofas in the common room.
Jamie glanced up from her laptop.
“What happened?”
“Got another practice paper back. It was a B.”
Jamie sighed wistfully. “I would kill for a B.”
“Yeah, but you didn’t only apply to universities which all ask for As. I did.”
“Did Dr Harris give you a hard time?”
“No. She pulled the whole ‘I’m worried about you’ thing.”
“She ask about your home life?”
Freya shrugged. “A little. She was mostly concerned at how inconsistent my answers were. Struggling with the more vaguely worded questions isn’t usually a sign of a difficult home life.”
“What is it a sign of, then?”
“Autism.”
“Oh, so you had that talk with her.”
“Yep. That talk. She thinks that, without the official accommodations that come with a professional diagnosis, I won’t get the grades I need. And, honestly, I think she’s right.”
“But I thought you said it takes years to get one. Will it actually be of any help?”
“I have no idea. I have to go and talk to Ms Wood and see if she can help.”
“Want me to come with?”
“No. She’ll just make you wait outside anyway. I just needed a few minutes before going to get my thoughts straight.”
She ran her hand through her hair, just as she spotted Damon entering the room.
“Actually, I think I’ll go now,” she said, getting up. “No point in wasting time.”
Jamie just gave her a glare that said that she wasn’t buying it. “Seriously, Freya, when are you two going to get all over this? You didn’t date for that long and you were friends for years before that.”
Freya sighed. “Yeah, I know, but... I don’t know. I guess it’s easier said than done.”
“No, I really don’t think it is.”
Freya didn’t have a response to that, so she just left, heading for Ms Wood’s office.
FREYA KNOCKED TENTATIVELY on Ms Wood’s door, hoping that she wasn’t busy with another student. She didn’t know that she could psych herself up for a second time in the same day. Or even the same week. Demons were easy; people were the worst.
“Come in,” she heard from inside.
She opened the door to see a young blonde woman sitting there. Freya was immediately apprehensive. She didn’t look a year out of university.
“Hey, I’m Freya Snow. Dr Harris asked me to come see you.”
“Yes, she sent me a message. Come in and sit down.”
Freya did as she was asked, trying her best not to fidget as she concentrated on eye contact. She didn’t manage it for more than a moment, however.
“So... Snow? According to my records, you were adopted this year. You kept your birth mother’s last name?”
“Yeah, I did. I just... wanted to maintain that connection.” It was only after she said it that Freya remembered that she wasn’t supposed to know anything about her mother. She wasn’t even sure how they had known that her last name was Snow, but she suspected Amber had played a part.
“I thought no one had ever identified your birth mother?”
Freya shrugged. “I did some research and found her a while back.”
“And you didn’t find any other family members?”
“No. They’re all dead.” Except for the sixteen year old great-aunt living in Australia, but she supposed that didn’t really count.
“What about your father?”
“I never found him.”
“And what about your adopted parents? Do you like them?”
“Of course. If I didn’t, I would have said something when they were just fostering me.”
“And I hear you have a baby sister. That must be nice. Or terrible, depending on your attitude towards babies, I guess.”
“No, no, Amy’s great. I love taking care of her. Not that I have to often or anything! But she’s awesome.” Freya took a deep breath, shutting her mouth. She frowned after taking a minute to think. “Wait, is that really all in my file? That seems like a little too in-depth.”
Ms Wood gave a sheepish shrug. “You caught me, Angel of the North. I’m a Seer.”
Freya groaned, rolling her eyes. “Okay, seriously, that name is getting old. I’m not an Angel. I can’t be. I was born after the Twilight died. Also, it’s just not that catchy. Or imaginative.”
“I didn’t make it up.”
“So, what are you?”
“A Seer. I told you.”
Freya frowned, trying to remember what she knew about Seers. They were potential Oracles, who had yet to be called by Fate.
“A Human Seer?”
She nodded. “My grandmother was a Witch, but I don’t have her power. I just see parts of Fate’s plan sometimes.”
“Including me?”
“You already knew that you were part of the plan. You’ve known for years now. You suspected that no one was given power like yours without reason and Peter confirmed those fears for you, even if you chose not to listen to him.”
“Peter was lying to me. He wanted me to rule the Earth.”
“He wanted you because he didn’t want Fate to have you.”
Freya sighed. “Okay, great. Fate’s plan is not why I’m here. I’m here about my grades.”
“Of course. You’re here to ask about an autism diagnosis.”
“Yeah.”
“Even if you go through with getting one, it’ll take a long time. You likely won’t have the help you need until university.”
Freya nodded, folding her arms. “I don’t know that I can bring my grades up. I spend all my free time studying already. If I gave up the Demon hunting too... I would burn out. I know it.”
“Maybe you should think about backup plans.”
She shook her head. “I can’t take a gap year. I can’t impose on Margaret and Ryan like that.”
“They’re your parents.”
“Still...”
“Alright then. Have you thought about courses you might be able to get in clearing? Maybe at a university that’s not a red-brick, or on a different course.”
“I... I hadn’t really considered it. Margaret went to a new university and she didn’t like it much. And I’ve never been able to see myself doing anything but science.”
“What about something more... magically inclined?”
“Like what? My Guardian keeps me pretty out of the loop when it comes to the magical community. She has trust issues.”
“Well, have you heard of the Hino Corporation?”
“No.”
“That’s not really surprising. It’s a parent company to lots of little companies. Many of the higher-ups are magical beings, and they know how to put magical talents to use.
“Actually, they have a work experience program for the London branch. I could send a query for you.”
“I... All the way in London?”
“They take care of accommodations for you.”
Freya nodded. “That actually sounds great.”
“Well then I’ll contact them. Would you still like to pursue a paper diagnosis for your autism?”
“So, you believe me?”
“Freya, I’m a Seer. You’re Autistic, that’s not in question. What is in question is whether or not you want a paper diagnosis. It can get you accommodations, but it might prove difficult for you later in life.”
“Difficult in a way that magic ca
n’t work around?”
Ms Wood shrugged. “Possibly. There are too many variables for me to give you a solid answer.”
Freya raised an eyebrow. “Too many variables? You mean you can’t see everything?”
“No, I only see Fate’s plan, and she allows for variables. She has to. Even she couldn’t control every little detail. And free will is always a factor.”
“Well then I’ll think about it.”
Ms Wood passed her a booklet. “This will have some information for your foster parents.” She passed her another. “And this has some information specific to girls. Forgive me if the question is too intrusive, but you don’t have an eating disorder, do you?”
“Now you’re worried about being intrusive?”
“I couldn’t see this.”
“No, I don’t. Why?”
“We often don’t catch autism in girls until they’re in here for anorexia. The booklet goes into it but... I just thought I’d check.”
“Nope, just regular old autism.”
“And dyslexia.”
“Dyslexia? I read just fine.”
“Your spelling is atrocious.”
“That’s just because I grew up with spell-check.”
“Or perhaps that’s just a rationalisation.”
Freya sighed. “Anything else?”
“Beside your anxiety and depression?”
“Yeah, beside those.”
“No.”
“Okay, good.”
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Also by L.C. Mawson
Castaway Heart
Castaway Heart
Castaway Soul
Castaway Love
Castaway Heart: The Complete Story
Engineered Magic
Soulbound
Engineered Rebel
Rebel
Resist
Freya Snow
Hunt
White
Wings
Oracle
Witch
Enhanced
Reaper
Trident
Kingsguard