by LK Collins
With slow, calculated movements, he pulls and pushes himself inside of me, causing my body to burn from head to toe. Every ounce of me needs this. I know this isn’t the first time Bain and I have had sex, but it feels like the first time we’ve really connected. I’ve only ever experienced this connection with one other person and to feel this again is so enlivening. With deep breaths, I begin to moan Bain’s name.
“Fuck…say it, A,” he grunts into my ear with a deep voice, pushing himself even farther inside of me.
I repeat it over and over again, letting the cries of passion take me far away from this world. He never picks up speed or moves with urgency. Finally, he lets go of my hands and pushes off of my back. I rest up on my elbows and then he pulls out of me, flipping me over and in the blink of an eye, he’s nuzzled himself back inside. With my eyes tightly shut, I wrap my legs around him and do my best to meet his every thrust.
His noises are such a fucking turn-on, they’re so deep and low. I can’t help but listen to him closely and get lost to him in this moment. Looking at Bain, he is in his zone, eyes closed, forehead creased, and lost in us.
“So sweet,” he whispers, a phrase that only Nate has ever said to me. Instantly, his face flashes before my eyes and I can’t help, but grab each of Bain’s ass cheeks, holding them firmly. The moment I make contact holding him like this, Nate is gone, and before me, only Bain, sexier than ever. In that moment, I realize maybe God brought him into my life for a reason. I’ll never get Nate back. I know that and I need to let him go. Maybe Bain is who I’m truly meant to be with?
Bain leans down, connecting our mouths, and I give him all of me. I turn over every single ounce of the woman that I am to this gorgeous man. As we kiss and fuck, he holds me firmly, coming inside of me. On cue, my body lets go along with his. Our tongues thrashing against one another’s, only intensifies every sensation.
Spirals and bliss, sprinkled with ecstasy, give me the most delicious orgasm ever. Once his movements slow, he begins to get off of me, but I stop him.
He looks down at me confused; we’ve never stayed connected like this before. “Are you ready to get going?” he asks.
I shake my head and wrap my arms around him, holding our bodies together. “No, let’s stay.”
Bain settles for a few moments, then looks down at me and says, “Arion, I don’t want to be the cause of any regrets for you.”
Smiling, I kiss him, and then pull him to lay his head back down on me. “You won’t.”
“I mean it. You mean too much to me to risk staying the night together.”
“Will you just be quiet and enjoy this moment?” I ask.
He nods his head on my chest and I gently rake my fingernails up and down his back. His skin, so soft and warm. My touch causes his dick to harden again inside of me.
“You’re an animal,” I tease him.
“I have to get my five hundred dollars worth of use out of this room. I know my dad is going to chew my ass later for this one, but it was so worth it.”
-Bain-
With Arion wrapped in my arms, all of my worries are suppressed to the back of my mind. The clock on the nightstand reads 10:47am. I know we have to check out at 11:00, but I can’t wake her. I just can’t. I’m still shocked that she stayed the night with me, and I fear deep down that this is going to change everything.
Even though she said it wouldn’t, I’m worried that it will. I’ve been up for over an hour, my mind racing over all the events that have taken place recently. And it all comes down to the fact that I have to make a decision. I’m almost twenty-three years old and Arion is right. Do I want to look back and be in the NBA or still in this rut? I can hear Kinsey now; she would be pissed at me for acting this way. Sometimes, I guess I just need a kick in the ass to put things in perspective and to fight for justice for Kinsey. I know I don’t want to live with regrets any longer; it’s something I’ve been wallowing in, a sickening, horrible feeling that I never want to experience again.
Arion stirs awake next to me. I release my grip on her warm, perfect body, allowing her to stretch. I watch a little scared, like the moment her eyes open she’s gonna freak out, but that moment never comes. Instead she rolls into me and wraps her arms around me. “What time is it?” she asks.
“Almost eleven,” I respond in a calm, even tone.
“Do we have to go soon?”
“Uh-huh.”
“I don’t wanna leave here.”
“Why?” I ask as she finally looks up at me, her eyes as clear as the ocean water.
“I love the city. Just something about it feels like home.”
“Why don’t you live here?”
“We don’t all have crazy money like you, Bain.”
“I don’t have crazy money. My parents do.”
“Well, regardless, it would be far from you.”
“And that’s a problem for you now?”
She nods her head and my heart tightens at her affection. For the first time since I’ve know her, I feel like she truly cares about me, and more than just as a casual fuck. I’ve known all along that she’s wanted me, but not like this.
Lying together with our legs interlocked and arms bound around each other’s naked bodies, I can truly say I’ve never felt this content with anyone. Basketball was always my priority, but Arion could be that, now.
I shake my head to clear those thoughts. Just because we stayed the night together doesn’t mean things are going to be any different and one comment from her certainly doesn’t change anything, or mean that she wants anything more than a fuck buddy. “I gotta pee,” she says sitting up. The sheets fall off her breasts before she gets up and walks into the bathroom stark naked and white as ivory. My cock tingles watching her leave. She’s so fucking hot. I hate that it’s close to 11. Damn it. I would fuck her like an animal if we didn’t have to check out, but it’s time to go. Getting out of bed, I find my clothes in a pile by the expansive wall of glass windows and begin to dress.
Arion emerges and asks, “Do we really have to go?”
“Yeah, look at the time. Besides, don’t you have work today?”
“Oh shit, I have to be there at noon.”
I can’t help, but laugh at her as she scrambles to get dressed.
“Why don’t you just call in?”
“No way, I’m the boss. I’ll just be a little late. You think I could work in these clothes?” she asks.
“Fuck no,” I blurt out as she looks at me in her skintight, white jeans.
“You’re right, let’s go.”
We fly out of the hotel and get the car from the valet. Thankfully, we’re at the right time to miss the really heavy traffic. But it’s New York, so it’s never really light.
I make the drive in great time and pull up to Arion’s in just under an hour.
“I’ll call you tonight,” she says, leaning over and kissing me quickly on the lips. But I can’t let her go that fast and I hold her face, keeping our mouths together a moment longer. She looks at me smiling before hopping out of my car and I watch until she’s safely inside. I hate to pull away, but I have to.
Once I’m home, I enter and the noise of the TV catches me off guard. ESPN is doing coverage for the upcoming draft. As I read the scroll bar on the side, it says Conner out, will Adams be the top point guard? Anxiously I sit down, waiting for the broadcast to get to my story. The announcers go over Conner’s injury and then debate if I’ll be the top point guard in the draft.
One of the announcers talks about how he thinks I don’t have a chance and that I’ll fall in the draft considering I haven’t played in the past few months. The other has a different opinion though, going on about the raw talent I possess and how you never lose that. Then they show a reel of highlight clips from some of my best games. Watching myself on the screen is something I haven’t seen in a while and it…excites me.
God, I really miss the game. I miss the guys and the camaraderie we shared when we played the game at suc
h a high level. I miss the roar of the crowds and how my body felt the next day; bone tired and completely satisfied that I’d played my heart out. It was the best. I listen intently, happy inside that watching myself sparks something – I do still fucking give a shit. It’s always been my dream, and for a short period of time I turned my back on it. But I think I now know what I have to do. As the debate ends and the guys never bring up Kinsey or why I’ve been out, I think I might have a shot at this.
Pulling my phone out, I make the call Arion promised I would. James answers right away. “I always knew you wouldn’t let this dream go.”
“Don’t jump ahead of yourself. Maybe I called to tell you I’m not interested,” I retort back at him.
“Come on, Bain, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity. You know this is what Kinsey would want you to do.” Hearing him bring her back up and how she would want me to do it, brings a weight over my body. Grief instantly replaces the thoughts that I could play ball again. Even though it would disappoint her, I’m not ready. there’s still so much that is going on, I just don’t think I can do this right now.
“Bain, are you there? Can you hear me?”
“Yeah…I’m here. Sorry. Listen can I call you later?”
“Nope, there’s no need for that. I’ll see you in an hour at the Jefferson Four-Forty for lunch.”
“James, I don’t think I can get there today.”
“You can and you will. Don’t bullshit me, son. Did you see the news?”
“Yeah, I did,” I grumble, hating to be spoken to like a rebellious teen. I guess it is a bit my fault for calling him.
“So you’re coming then?”
I agree to go, because it’s only a conversation and James is just trying to help. He’s always wanted what’s best for me and maybe he can help me figure out just what that is. Plus for a brief moment, watching myself play sparked something inside of me. We hang up and I head into the restroom, looking at my blank expression in the mirror.
Instinctively, I pull open the drawer that contains all of my pill bottles. Jesus Christ, I’m a goddamn mess. I really don’t have time for that shit, but I can’t get through this conversation sober. I know if I do this and agree to get back into basketball, I’ll have to be done with these forever. But I’ll worry about that then. Fuck, maybe I can make it through the day on just this one pill and then dwindle the cravings down slowly over the next few days. Opening my drawer, I take a Hydro.
Checking the time on my watch, I hop in the shower and change, not wasting a second to allow myself to change my mind, before jumping back in the car. The Four-Forty is a bit of a drive from my house, so I text James and let him know that with traffic, I’m running a bit late. He texts back that he’s already got us a table.
Parking out front, I take a shaky breath and hope this is something I can do. I’ve come this far. Walking inside, I see his salt-n-pepper hair right away, then his smile.
He stands as I approach and proceeds to hug me. “It’s good to see you, son.”
“Same to you, Coach,” I respond as he passes me his cell phone, showing me a text that reads, Do you think you can get me an interview with Adams?
“Who’s that from?” I ask as we both sit down.
“Yahoo Sports. An old friend of mine saw us talking at the game last night.”
I shake my head and place my face in my hands. This is unreal, absolutely unreal.
“Bain, I know you’re not feeling like your heart’s in it anymore, but I can’t let you turn your back on this. This is too big of an opportunity.”
“I know,” I respond staring into my lap, picking at the rough fabric of my jeans.
“Listen, I wanna manage you. I don’t want you to pay me or anything. I just want to see you succeed and ultimately watch you be happy, knowing I had a part in it.”
“But what if I don’t make it, or I’m not the same on the court anymore?”
“You will be. I know for a fact, son, raw talent of your degree doesn’t change. Yeah, you’ll be a little rusty, but a few weeks of workouts and you’ll be back to how you were. ”
“If we do this, do I have to go back to school?”
“No,” he firmly replies. “You have enough credits to graduate. Guys join the NBA all the time after a few years of college.”
“How do you know so much about me?”
“You’ve always been my favorite kid. I’ve kept tabs on you over the years and after your sister passed, I made sure that you leaving school wouldn’t impact your degree. I’ve always known the NBA would want you, I just didn’t know they would project you to get drafted so high.”
“I can’t believe that’s what they are saying.”
“I know, but with Conner out, you’re it. Your time’s now, Bain.”
“Damn. Okay. I hear all that you’re saying, I really do. I do feel I wanna give it a try, but I need to see how I feel on the court.”
“I can get you into a few pick-up games.”
“Fuck no,” I blurt out, “Not if everyone has their eyes on me. Not yet anyways. Let’s get some practice in first, let me shake the rust off.”
“I was hoping you were going to say that. I talked to Damian Millani – you remember him, don’t you?”
My mind flashes back to the seven-foot-tall ex-NBA all-star himself. “How could I not remember him? He’s a legend.”
“He a very good friend of mine. He said if we’re interested he’s happy to let us use his private gym.”
Staring at James point blank, I simply ask him, “How did you set all this up? I mean, what if I would’ve said no?”
“I’m methodical, and I knew you wouldn’t let me down. Come on, let’s get going.”
“What about lunch?” I complain.
“That’s right, you do need to put some weight back on.”
James calls the waiter over and we both order burgers. Then spend far too much time reminiscing. Going back reminds me why I love the game so much, and James too. He really molded me into the player that I am today.
_____
Driving back home after one hell of a day of practice, I can’t help the smile that’s on my face. It’s ear to ear and I’ve never felt better. Well, if it weren’t for the nagging background noise of my body starting to wear down from not having any pills. But my shooting from within the paint was ninety percent and my free throws were on fire. My phone rings and the screen shows it’s a private number.
“Hello,” I answer.
“Bain, sweetie, is everything okay?” my mother asks in a panicked tone.
“Yeah, of course mom, why?
“It’s your dad. I can’t get a hold of him.”
“Come on, Mom, you know how busy he is. I’m sure he’s been in meetings or something.”
“I don’t know, Bain. I have a bad feeling.”
“I’ll talk to him soon and tell him to answer next time you call whether he’s busy or not. I promise he’s been good. Just working a lot.”
“Okay, thank you, dear. I’m sorry to call in such a tizzy. It’s just…I…I can’t have anything happen to my guys.”
“It won’t. I promise we’re good. How have you been?”
“Good, really good. I’m starting to feel like myself. How ‘bout you? What have you been up to?”
“Not much. I actually practiced some basketball today with Coach Lawrence.”
“Oh my God, honey, that’s great news. How was it? How did you get in touch with him?”
“I ran into him at a Knicks game the other night.”
“Really? Who did you go with?” she asks surprised. I know why her tone is the way it is. Although she was a drunk for the last six months, she knew I was in a slump and had pushed all of my friends away.
Should I tell her about Arion?
“Uhh, just a friend.”
“Bain…”
Her tone is long and drawn out, reminding me of the way she used to get when Kinsey and I would get in trouble.
“It�
�s just a girl, Mom.”
“Really, just a girl?
“Yeah, really.
“Bain, you haven’t dated a girl in months. If you’re spending your time with one now and getting back into basketball, something has happened.”
“Time’s up, Renee,” I faintly hear a woman in the background say.
“I gotta go, sweetie. You should bring her down here. I wanna meet this girl.”
“We’ll see. Goodbye, Mom. I love you.”
“Love you, son. Bye,” she says and we hang up.
Not only hearing my mom’s voice, but hearing her in such good spirits, makes today one of the best days I’ve had in a long time – a really, really long time.
-Kinsey-
“Do you want another glass of wine?” Anthony asks me.
“Are you trying to get me drunk?”
“Never,” he says pouring me another glass without waiting for my response. I smirk at him, sipping on the deliciousness that he’s serving me.
“What is this?”
“It’s a Pink Moscato. You like it?”
“I love it.”
“Good. So tell me, what are your goals after you graduate?”
Staring into the corner of the room, I contemplate his question. What are my goals after I graduate?
“I really don’t know. Jesus, that sounds horrible. I don’t have a plan for my life yet.”
“It’s not horrible; you’re young. I felt that way at one point too, but I discovered that I had a talent and I could share that with emerging photographers like you. What do you like to photograph?”
“Don’t laugh, okay?”
“Never, this is your life we’re talking about.”