by Zi'ere
“We were there when you met him, Guh! What are you talking about?”
I have more patience with her than Jai.
“I think that Cleophis is Essence’s daddy.”
“You a damn lie!”
If my shoes weren’t already off of my feet, this tidbit of information would have knocked them off.
She’s never told either of us not once, that her middle child could have been fathered by a damn near eighty year old man.
67
The night was designated to be my pity party, as I drown my sorrows in alcohol for the first time in my life. Instead, I have a real life soap opera playing out in front of me. I hang back and let one of my besties confess all of her sins. None of us can come up with a solution, when tearing down the illusion her twelve year old daughter having to know about who her real father was. Neither Jai nor I can justify putting all of this information onto the little girl’s plate.
Her dad is now deceased and she’s never seen him, let alone met him. We all knew that Cleophis has children old enough to be our mothers and a wife that he’s been with since he was in high school. We decide then and there that we will definitely support her at the funeral and during the reading of his will, when his wife gets the shock of her life.
I can’t comprehend sitting by and listening to my husband of over fifty years even leaving another woman fifty dollars. We have no idea what he’s left to who but fireworks are surely going to be in the place. I’m not about to miss that event for anything in the world! Anything that take my mind off of how disrespectful that Gavin has been to me is a more than welcomed distraction.
I turn my personal cell phone off but the ringer to the business phone is on high. Broderick has long since told me that he feels that I need to still hang on to the phone because I have the power to make the hard decisions and handle funds appropriately. The way that he talks, you would think that it is his money. From what all I have seen and heard, he is just as paid as Pain, so I take it like a grain of salt.
When I finally make it to my bed at a little after four am the next day, I have a few text messages from him on the business phone. I have one million voice mails and text messages from Pain. Without listening to them or reading anything, I delete them all at once. I then respond to Stymy simply to say that I’m not okay at the moment, but I will be in the future. There is no doubt in my mind that he knows exactly where I am as well.
Homework won’t let me freestyle in life, without structure for too long. By Sunday evening, I am ready to get home to my own surroundings with the noise of nothing. After church and dinner with my girls and kids, I travel back to my own castle.
I have let the apartment go but my mind still travels there. I will have to get used to this house, the same way that I’d gotten used to it. I have the locksmith to call me when he enters my subdivision.
I need every single door that can be opened by key, changed before I will sleep here. When I shut my eyes to sleep, may God be with anyone who opens up my bedroom door because I’ve gotten used to sleeping with a nine millimeter up under my pillow. The police can handle the rest after they’ve been contacted by the alarm company.
The sweaty team of father and son get everything changed over for me, including the locks on the garage doors. The little shits cost me a heavy grip. Just as I am settling down for the night, Broderick texts me on the business phone.
Broderick: ‘r u ok?’
Me: ‘I will b.’
Broderick: ‘Good move with the locks.’
Me: ‘Damn u nosey!’
Broderick: ‘u have no idea’
I have an idea but I’m not interested in having a conversation with anyone at the moment. I am tired and the brand new sheets that I just got from out of the dryer are begging for my attention.
The work week starts like one that I have seen before. I make a bold sign to put on the front door of the clinic-
Anyone entering the office, who isn’t a patient and is not looking for medical attention will be escorted off of the property by the police.
I have no desire to see any type of floral arrangements at all. I begin to turn down lunch with my co-workers, in order to work straight through my lunch break. I want to change my schedule up so I leave earlier from home so that I can return earlier than normal.
I begin to take some of my vacation time that I’ve earned but never use because I am too afraid to lose my position. But with my experience and degree’s Doc will be a fool to let me go. I praise God that I have come this far to set my own schedule. Thursday I come into the office with the intent on only seeing two clients. I will be back at the house by ten am and on a plane to Hawaii by three that afternoon.
68
Pain is still in panic mode over the end of our quick romance and marriage that has turned into a disease between us. I am still ignoring his calls and texts three months after I have kicked him to the curb. I will answer for Emma but I won’t even get into a heavy conversation with her.
I have already given her son another chance once, under her advice. So she doesn’t have a leg to stand on for a second time. The only person that I am talking to from Pain’s camp is Broderick. Anytime that I do anything out of the ordinary, he will always call or text. I wonder how long that Pain is going to pay someone to follow my every move.
I have just started the ignition on the truck when the phone begins to ring on the black business phone. It is a number that isn’t stored in the phone and I am curious as to who is dialing the number.
“Hello?”
“Kamille?”
“This is she. Who is this?”
“Oh Girl . . . I’m sorry….this is Sanye. I’m sitting here going over Broderick’s phone bill and I’m wondering why he’s calling this number so much. I always have known the number to the business line before….you know for emergencies and stuff.”
Sanye sounds real nervous.
“You know that after the shooting the men switched up phones and numbers right?”
“Duh, brain freeze! I forgot all about that! You have one of the cloned phones.”
“Yea, that’s why I have it…for emergencies and stuff……That’s what I’ve been told. You know how that goes.”
“Yea you’re right. Okay Boss Lady, I won’t hold you up. Have a good rest of the day now.”
This insecure heifer has the nerve to try to rush me off the phone.
“Bye, Hun!”
Having full control over my facial features can’t even begin to stop the look of disgust that I have on my face, when I throw the phone onto the passenger seat. My eyebrow is raised and my lips are pursed. Maybe it is her that has her man giving me fifty feet lately. I haven’t even made it out of the parking lot before the phone rings once again.
My first mind wants to toss the phone out of the window. I decide against it because I am still a big part of the family. I am still the banker. No matter how many times that I beg for the bank to be moved, the more they met me with opposition. Saying that I am frustrated is an understatement. The phone rings again but this time it is my personal cell.
“Can you tell me what I have done to you for you to avoid me like you have been doing lately?” Jai sounds sad.
“Aww, Boo! Don’t do that. I’m sorry, I have no excuses.”
“So, it’s not me….it’s your situation right?”
“Yes, Mama. All of this shit with Pain and his family is surely giving me gray hairs!”
“Kam, you don’t have to let them conform you to their fucked up way of life.”
“I’m trying not to, Cousin. Let me catch this phone and I will call you back in a bit.”
“Okay. KAMILLE, CALL ME BACK, do you understand me?”
“Yes Jai . . . Damn! I’m gonna call you back!”
What in the hell are they putting in the water in Chandler? Folks are crazy as hell today!
My patience is now on zero with the business phone again.
“HEEELLOOOO? WHAT NOW?”
“Well it….”
I begin to take the edge off of his attitude when I notice that I am now talking to myself.
He has long ago hung up.
Had I bothered to even look at the screen, then I wouldn’t have answered with so much attitude. My guess is that he is now somewhere digging in Sanye’s ass for calling the business phone for one, for going over his detailed cell phone bill for two, and also for hemming me up for longer than a minute.
Powerful men can pick up the scent of insecurity like a bloodhound. Sanye has long passed that stage in their relationship. It is also an educated guess of my own that her man is now at his limit. I have come to know that Tiffani and Sanye possess some of the same traits, his words- not mines.
Arizona’s heat is really getting to me. I pull into a Smoothie King for a healthy snack. The drive-thru is backed up, so I decide to go inside. I am standing in line behind this tall and lean brother, who is wearing half of a business suit. The gray suit pants are coordinated with a lavender long-sleeved business shirt, yet the tie he has chosen is different.
The light-skinned man is toned and it isn’t hard to see that he takes good care of his body. When he pays for his order, he steps aside and takes in the sights behind him. Our eyes lock on each other and smiles automatically form on our lips.
Helloooo sexy! What yo name is? Oh!
“Hi . . . Welcome to Smoothie King. What can I get for you today?” The chipper little blonde girl abruptly snaps me out of my thoughts.
“Umm, can I um, uh . . . Can I have a medium Caribbean Way, please?”
Before I can slide her my debit card, Mr. Oh So Fine is handing her his card instead to purchase my drink.
“This one is on me.”
He winks at me.
I would object but I have no time. He is signing his receipt again within seconds.
“Bryce Hawkins, nice to meet you.”
“Kamille Foster, nice to meet you too.”
Chit chats over the sounds of four blenders going full speed at one time is kind of cute. By the time we have our drinks, he is opening the door for me to exit. I lead him to my car that is parked, right beside his shiny new baby blue Bentley. I am in the big leagues to stay. We both exchange business cards.
My self-confidence is at an all-time high. Kamille has come into her own full circle. I have letters at the end of my name now. There is nothing that Neka can say to tear me down on this day. Driving off, I have no idea why she of all people comes to mind.
I am kind of pissed that she isn’t around to try and talk shit to me now. Thoughts of a new guy is what I need at the time to get my head right. No number of girl’s night outs can fix the damage that Pain has done.
I know that he will never admit to it, nor has he let me see him with another woman but I know for a fact that he hasn’t dedicated his penis to the savior. I have long ago obtained a clean bill of health from my doctor. I have paid extra to get tested once a month for the last three months. And by me, I do mean Pain.
The business phone rings yet once again. But before that I can pick it up, it stops ringing.
No harm, no foul.
69
When I make it to the house, Broderick’s truck is parked in my driveway. I can’t see inside but it is my prayer that he hasn’t folded and brought Pain to my house for one of his emergency talks. I expect him to be here to pick up or drop off money but I need for him to be here anyway. They need to be put on notice that their personal banker is going to be gone for three weeks. So now is as good of a time as any to clean out my basement full of dirty money.
I hear a single door close and seconds later he is inside of the garage, as soon as the door lowers and locks. He opens the driver’s side door and then holds out his hand to help me out of the truck.
“I’m glad that you are here. You need to get that money out of my basement. I’m leaving town for a while.”
“Where is ole boy’s number?”
“What?”
“Kamille you heard me. Where is that muthafucka’s number that you just got at Smoothie King?”
“You were following me?”
“That’s beside the point!”
He reaches inside of the truck and then he takes the card out of my purse.
He then jams it into his pants pocket.
“I don’t know if you’ve gotten the memo or not. But at the top of it are the specifics, which state that I am once again a single woman again!”
“The memo that I got says that the only reason you aren’t single is because that fool hasn’t signed the papers AND I can’t tell anybody that you belong with me right now!”
I stop in my tracks. In the middle of my kitchen I am frozen as if time has stopped. I have to be hearing things. I am well aware that Pain is dodging being served divorce papers. And I am even surer that he won’t sign when he receives them.
“Kamille, when I saw you with my boy I already knew he would do everything that he has done to you. I may not have all of the book smarts that you have but I have plenty of common sense. That’s the reason that I don’t hang around Sanye and have a gang of kids . . . It’s for a reason. I know what I have. I know how to make my side sell as legit for this life that I live. I have spent all of my days building a life that I am going to have with a woman . . . One who will never give me play, just because of what I do out here in the streets.
The value is in a woman who isn’t impressed with money. I’ve sat back and watched you. I’ve protected you the best that I can. I’m not about to sit back and watch another muthafucka to slide in on me. I don’t care who finds out what, when, or why. I’m not going to do it again!”
I can’t turn around to face him. He has said his entire speech to my back. I am clueless about what it is that I am supposed to do with the information just given to me. Oxygen isn’t circulating through my body anymore. I feel hot and I feel the hairs stand up on my neck and arms.
“You don’t have to say anything right now. I know that it’s a lot. It is a lot for me not to roll up on you. I know that you are lonely, Kam. Hell, I’m lonely too! I’ve allowed myself to fall in love with you. I fought it as much as I could, I swear that I have. But these feelings won’t go away. I don’t even know if I want for them to.”
He pauses, as if the words that he is saying are too nasty to be in his mouth.
“Please just tell me where are you going? Why have you taken three weeks off from work?”
I can’t answer one question before he is throwing another at me. Then immediately after that, the doorbell rings. I can’t ask for a better distraction. I scurry my way up to the front door, only to find Gavin propped up with his cane on the welcome mat.
“What are you doing here without calling me first?”
“Why is Stymy’s truck in your driveway is a better question that you need to answer first?”
“Look, I’m not about to do this with you today. I have shit to do that doesn’t concern any of ya’ll.” When I step out of the doorframe, Broderick is behind me to take the reins of the situation.
I run up the stairs to my bedroom and then I slam the door. Any and everything they could need from the house, they both are clear on where it is located. They don’t need me. I only have the things that I use to primp this morning, to pack before I need to head back on out of the door.
Broderick’s bomb has slowed me down. I had really intended on having a relaxing period, where I can double walk my steps to make sure that I have everything that I need. The only thing that I have to do now is to deposit my weekly allowance into my checking account, for me to use while on vacation.
I am still skimming off the top of Gavin’s money, while I am still his banker. He is well aware of the percentage that I have been taking faithfully, since he’s been away. Just in the last month he’s stopped making sure that the bills are paid an
d I take that to mean that I should just take what I need.
I don’t really need anything but I take what I want. I don’t have kids to take care of but I think that ten grand a week isn’t doing him wrong. I am sure to add the figures to the sheets that his left hand turns over to him. No one is prepared when I appear at the top of the stairs. I am now pulling a suitcase big enough for my body to fit in, a duffle carry on, and my own personal bag to match the Gucci set.
I am dressed in a tangerine calf length halter dress with designer brown leather sandals. Both men look at me, absolutely speechless. Had Gavin taken the time to stop drooling and to look over at this man, it would have been a fight. Both men’s eyes are transfixed on me. It takes a few seconds for Gavin to elbow Stymy to help me.
“Where are you going?” Gavin starts off asking me questions.
“Have you signed the divorce papers?”
“Come on now, I’m not doing that until we’ve had a chance to sit down and talk about what’s going on between us.”
“You know what I do when I need to talk, I call my doctor. Speaking of which, have you two slut and smut buckets had an antibiotic shot yet?”
“You’re trying to redirect my attention away from what you doing right now!”
“Man, it’s been three months; you don’t get to ask me questions about my comings and goings anymore.”
“I told your homeboy here that you need to get into your bank and take the bulk of it because I’m not telling anyone how long I will be gone, when I’m coming back, or where I’m going. Did you handle that….cause that is all that you need to be concerned with.”
“Kam, you know that we can’t take that kind of money out of here and trust anyone else with it.”
“You mean to tell me that you can’t trust your baby mama with your millions? Yet you trust her enough to have unprotected sex with her, while you are still running up in me raw? Then you turn around and give me an STD? You sure were trusting her a whole helluva lot then.”
“I think that we just need to get enough to top off what is coming in, so that we can re-up. I will take care of the storage part.”