He believed in God, all right. He just knew better than to count on him to take care of things in his life. He’d made that mistake before and paid for it with outright rejection and shredded pride.
Mrs. Mayweather lifted a brow as she turned to him. “Jackson, do you have anything to say to that?”
What he wanted to say was more appropriate for a railroad camp than ladies’ ears. But Jack gritted his teeth, tempered his thoughts and chose his words carefully. “The widow is quite right. She’s not qualified to judge the depths of my faith or lack thereof. It’s a personal matter between me and God, and one not open to debate or discussion.”
Her face reddened slightly and she gave him an apologetic look. “You’re right, Mr. Tyler. Forgive my presumption.” She leaned forward. “It’s just that I feel very deeply that it’s important for parents to set the proper example and direction in spiritual matters for their children.”
Mrs. Mayweather nodded. “Very true.” She turned back to Jack. “Well, what about you? For all your posturing and blustering about being able to take care of everything yourself, you know quite well you are not able to raise those children on your own. And Callista not only has the right qualifications, she’s agreed to do this very thing once already.”
She paused and gave him a considering look. “Unless…Your affections are not already otherwise engaged, are they?”
Jack cleared his throat. “No, but—”
“We already know Callista was Julia’s trusted friend and Leland’s choice for his second wife. That gives us a firm basis to believe she’ll make a good wife and mother. So surely you don’t object to her on those grounds.”
“As someone has already pointed out,” Jack said, cutting a hard glance Callie’s way, “I’m a very different man than my brother, so his choice is not necessarily a good indicator of my own preferences.”
Mrs. Mayweather waved away his objection. “Even so, a marriage between you two would solve all of the problems. Callista, you could take care of the children and the house, and Jackson, you could provide for them and take care of the farm. The children would have both a mother and a father to provide the guidance they’ll need.”
Jack and Callie avoided looking at each other.
“And if you do feel the need to return to your job again, you can do so knowing the children are in good hands, Jackson. Really, this does seem to settle matters nicely for everyone concerned.”
Jack’s hands balled into tight fists. The woman had definitely overstepped her bounds.
“However, as I said, this is merely a suggestion. You are free to pursue another course of action if you wish. But you need to decide quickly, for the sake of the children. Now, I’ll go check on them while you two discuss your options.”
Once she’d left the room, Callie stood there, acutely aware of Jack standing beside her, mechanically handling the dishes, the minutes drawing out between them in brittle silence.
Marry this man! How could Mrs. Mayweather expect her to seriously contemplate such a step? Did the woman think she’d be willing to marry just anyone who seemed in need of a housekeeper and nanny?
Callie remembered her first impression of Jack back on the stagecoach—a ruggedly handsome, dangerous sort of man. Not at all the type of fellow to be comfortable setting down roots and nurturing a family. And not at all the type of fellow who’d be looking for the likes of her in a wife if he did.
His aversion to the whole idea of marrying her, in fact, had been immediately obvious. No, Mrs. Mayweather had been wrong—this wasn’t the answer.
Actually, she’d been right about one thing. They couldn’t keep going the way they were.
Finally, as she handed him a saucer to dry, Callie broke the silence. “She’s right, you know.”
His brow raised.
“Not about the marriage thing.” Goodness, but this was awkward. She tried to ignore the heat rising in her cheeks and push on. “But about the need for us to reach a decision.”
Callie reached for the next dish on the stack. “I agree with her that it’s not fair to keep the children in limbo. Annabeth doesn’t understand why she can’t go back to her own house. And Simon and Emma need a place to set down new roots.”
Jack placed the dry saucer in the cupboard and held out his hand for the next one. “So what do you suggest?”
Callie dipped a plate in the rinse water and handed it to him without meeting his gaze. “Perhaps we could divide the responsibilities the way she described—I manage the children, you run the farm—but do it without a marriage. I mean, it is a big house after all.”
He gave a grunt of cynical amusement. “Not if you want to be able to show your face in this town.” As soon as the words were out of his mouth he gave her a penitent look. “I’m sorry, I meant—”
“That’s all right, Mr. Tyler, I know what you meant. Please don’t feel like you have to watch your words with me.” She wiped her brow with the back of a wet hand. It was almost amusing the way he tried to bend over backwards to make her believe her birthmark wasn’t an issue. “I suppose you’re right. Conventions can be bothersome at times, but they are there for a reason.”
She plopped the last bowl in the dishwater with a splash. “So, do you have an alternative to offer?”
“I’m still not convinced I couldn’t handle this on my own. I might have to hire a housekeeper to help out, but otherwise we’d be fine.”
The man didn’t seem to know the meaning of the word compromise. “That’s not a solution.”
“Why not?”
He knew very well why not, but she refused to let him goad her into losing her temper. “Well, for one thing it cuts me out of the picture and I refuse to let that happen.”
She handed him the bowl then wiped her hands on her apron, maintaining eye contact with him the whole time. “But even if that weren’t the case, a housekeeper is not the same as a mother. There’s nothing to hold her to the children but a wage. That’s one of the reasons Leland discarded that option in favor of marrying again.”
She finally turned away and took a seat at the table, her hands twisting in her skirts. This was impossible!
He joined her, taking a seat directly across the table. “Lanny and I didn’t necessarily share the same views on everything.”
She wondered at his tone, but now was not the time to try to figure out his personal issues. “So you said. Still, you have to agree that it’s not what their parents would want for them.”
He tilted his chair back, letting it balance on the two back legs. “So what do you suggest?”
Callie stared down at her hands, clasped together on top of the table. Heavenly Father, if it is truly Your will for me to be a part of these children’s lives, You’re going to have to help me work this out.
She finally looked up and met Jack’s gaze. “I don’t have one yet.”
“Then it seems we’re back at square one.”
Callie wondered again at his tone. Did he object to marriage in general, or just tying himself to her? After all, he wasn’t Lanny. He hadn’t known of her disfigurement for years, nor had he gotten to know her through her letters and the filter of Julia’s love.
Even given his pronouncement that her birthmark didn’t bother him, it was a far cry from wanting to tie himself down to her. A man like him would want a woman who was pretty, vibrant, worldly. She was none of those things.
Did he still use Julia as his gold standard for judging women?
Gathering her courage, Callie forced her voice to remain even. “If it’s me you object to, I mean, if there’s another woman you’d prefer to marry, to help in raising the children—”
“No.”
His protest was too quick, too sharp. Perhaps he was trying to spare her feelings. Or maybe he didn’t want to admit the truth, even to himself.
He rubbed the back of his neck, something he seemed to do whenever he was uncomfortable. “I mean, if marriage is really the only answer—and that’s a big ‘if�
��—then of course it should be between the two of us. We’re the ones who share a feeling of responsibility for the children’s well-being.”
Fine sounding words, but she wasn’t buying it.
His face got that closed-off look again. “I’m just not convinced yet that it is the only answer.”
But what if it was? Could they live with such an arrangement? “If we do this, it would strictly be for the sake of the children.” She traced a circle on the table with one finger, avoiding even so much as a glance his way. “I mean, we would naturally agree that it would be in name only.”
Jack let the chair fall forward. “Of course.”
She forced herself to continue. “And we would need to come to a clear understanding of what we would be agreeing to.”
“For instance?”
She finally dragged her gaze up to his. Seeing the intense look on his face almost doused her resolve. Almost. “Do you intend to go back to your old job?”
He folded his arms. “Not right away,” he said slowly. “I mean, if we did get married, I’d stay around as long as you and the kids needed me to. But once things settled down, say after a month or so, then I don’t see why I wouldn’t.” He rested his still-crossed arms on the table. “I’m good at my job and I make good money at it, more than I could make off of the farm.”
“Money isn’t everything, Mr. Tyler. Lanny and Julia, for instance, seemed to do quite well on the farm alone.”
A muscle at the corner of his mouth jumped. “Let me put this another way. I’m not Lanny and that’s not the life I planned for myself.”
Apparently she’d said something to ruffle his feathers again. No, theirs could never be a simple, comfortable relationship.
Even with the bonds of matrimony.
That unbidden thought brought heat to her cheeks. Luckily, Jack didn’t seem to notice.
“If you’re worried I’m going to abandon you and the kids, though,” he continued in that tight voice, “you can put your mind at rest. When I go back to doing demolition work, I’ll make a point to come back several times a year.”
“I see. In that case, if you’re really willing to stay here long enough to teach me how to take care of the place, we could probably make this work.”
One eyebrow went up. “Even if I gave you daily lessons for a month, do you really think you could learn to run the farm by yourself?”
His lack of confidence in her abilities stung. “Julia was a city girl like me and learned to do most of the chores as well as any girl born to this life.”
“But Julia started her learning at age eleven, not twenty-five.”
She refused to back down. “That just means I’ll have to work harder, not that I can’t learn. And, as Mrs. Mayweather said, we can hire someone to help out a few days a week.”
“So you admit you’ll need help.”
She let out a huff of irritation. “I’m not a ninny, Mr. Tyler. I know my limitations. I will freely admit that I’m not capable of caring for the children and a farm on my own.” She studied the back of her hands. “There is one other thing.”
“And that is?”
“I intend to raise these children to know and delight in the teachings of the Bible. You profess to be a Christian, just not the ‘praying sort.’ While I don’t understand how this can be, I won’t attempt to judge you. Each person must wrestle with his beliefs in his own way.” She sat up straighter. “But, while you are here, I ask that you support me in providing the proper encouragement and example to the children. Surely you agree that bringing them up in the Word is important?”
She waited for his nod, then continued. “So you understand that we have a big responsibility before us. As the head of the household, your influence on the children would be strongest. I’d expect you to take part in family Bible readings and to accompany us to Sunday services. And of course we’d say grace at every meal and make certain the children say their prayers when they go to bed at night.”
He didn’t say anything at first, and Callie held her breath. Surely he wouldn’t balk at such a request, would he? “I believe it’s what your brother and sister would have wanted for their children.”
His jaw clenched, but he finally nodded. “You’re right. Such things are important in bringing up children.”
Such things were not just for children, but now was not the time to push that issue.
Callie felt a sudden fluttering in her stomach as the import of what they were contemplating sunk in. At some point they had moved from talking about it in abstract terms to figuring out how to make it work.
She gave him a weak smile. “We’re really going to do this, aren’t we?”
His answering smile held a touch of self-mockery. “It appears so.”
“When?”
“No point putting it off. We can talk to the preacher tomorrow and set a date.”
Not the most romantic of proposals. Callie kept her hands tightly clasped in her lap, trying to remain anchored in this suddenly shaky reality.
Heavenly Father, is this really what You desire for me? Jack is nothing like his brother. Can he truly be the life partner You prepared for me?
She turned to Jack, trying to picture this new turn her life seemed to be taking, trying to see through the emotionless façade he’d erected, to figure out his true feelings. But it was no use. “So what now?”
A hint of her inner turmoil must have communicated itself to him because his demeanor changed and some of the hardness left his face. She was struck again by his ability to set his own worries aside. Here he was, being pushed into a corner, being forced to give up much of the freedom and footloose independence he obviously craved. But he was ready to do it without further complaint.
All for the sake of the children.
He stood and held out a hand to help her rise. “I guess now we tell Mrs. Mayweather that, once again, she was right.”
Chapter Twelve
“We have something to tell you.”
Breakfast was over and all three children sat side by side on the parlor settee, looking equal parts apprehensive and curious.
Callie caught her bottom lip between her teeth and risked a quick look Jack’s way.
He gave her a barely perceptible nod, but seemed content to let her take the lead for now. Almost as if he were saying this was all her doing so she should handle it.
She turned back to the children, making a point to capture the gaze of each of them in turn. How were they going to react to the news?
Annabeth suddenly sat up straighter, her expression hopeful. “Are we moving back to my house today?”
“Not today,” Jack answered, “but very soon.”
“Then what’s the news?” Simon’s surly response indicated he wasn’t expecting to like whatever it was.
Callie said a silent prayer for the right words and plunged in. “Your Uncle Jack and I had a long conversation last night. We decided we would like for all five of us to live together as a family. But if we are truly going to be a family then we need to start acting like one. So,” she took a deep breath, “the two of us are going to get married.”
Annabeth wrinkled her brow as if not certain what to make of the news. “You mean, just like a real mommy and daddy.”
Simon stiffened. “They’re not my mom and dad, and no stupid wedding is gonna change that.”
Callie leaned forward. “Oh, Simon, we know that no one can ever take the place of your parents in your heart.” She looked at the girls, including them in the discussion. “But they’re up in heaven now and you all need someone to look out for you until you’re grown up enough to take care of yourselves.”
She waved a hand in Jack’s direction. “And we would dearly love to be those someones.”
Simon leaned back, crossing his arms tightly over his chest. He obviously wasn’t taken with the idea.
She tried a different approach. “And that also means you need to start thinking of each other as brother and sisters, not just cousi
ns. How does that sound?”
The girls nodded, but Simon remained closed off.
“Simon, this is especially important for you. You’ll need to be a big brother to Annabeth as well as Emma, which means looking out for both of them. Do you think you can manage that?” She held up a hand before he could say anything. “It’s a very important responsibility. Don’t say yes unless you mean it.”
“Simon already takes care of us,” Annabeth said quickly. “Don’t you, Simon?”
Simon nodded. “Don’t worry.” He thrust his chin out. “I’ll look out for them, same as I’ve been doing since the fire.”
“When are you gonna get married?” Emma’s quiet question gave no hint as to what she felt.
“We’re going to talk to Reverend Hollingsford today.” Jack had apparently decided to get involved in the conversation. “If he’s agreeable, we’ll have the ceremony sometime in the next couple of days.”
“Then can we move back to my house?” Annabeth seemed to have a one track mind.
“Yes, we can.” Jack leaned forward. “But it won’t be just your house any more, Little Bit—it’ll be a home for all of us together.”
There he went again, surprising her by dealing with the children’s concerns in a straightforward but sensitive manner.
She gave him a quick smile, then touched Annabeth’s hand. “You won’t mind that, will you, sweetheart?”
“No.” Annabeth twisted one of her ringlets around her finger. “But do I have to share Cinnamon, too?”
“Cinnamon is all yours,” Callie said. “But it would be nice if you would let Emma and Simon ride him sometimes.”
The child nodded. “I can do that.”
Jack stood. “And since we’re all going to be living at the farm, your Aunt Callie and I thought it might be a good idea to take another trip out there this afternoon to start getting things ready.”
Annabeth bounced up and down with excitement. “Oh, yes! And I can visit with Cinnamon and Taffy and Pepper again.”
Seeing the little girl’s enthusiasm, some of Callie’s uncertainty faded. This might just possibly work.
The Hand-Me-Down Family Page 9