“She must be under the weather tonight,” my dad says. “She doesn’t seem to be in any hurry to serve the food.” We both watch as Mary moves to the end of the table where she proceeds to stand like cement has been poured over her feet.
My gaze moves to Lu. She’s practically bending over backwards trying to pretend I don’t exist. Her reaction to me does not bode well.
Tapping her wine glass to get everyone’s attention, my mother announces, “Alfred and I are so pleased that you all could join us for supper this evening. It’s not every day we have our nearest and dearest so close at hand.”
Totally breaking character, Andrew grumbles, “Please, Mother. We all see this night for what it is.”
“Which is?” The look she shoots him dares him to say more.
As the oldest, and the heir to the throne, my brother has been held to a higher level of decorum than the rest of us. As such, he reins in his temper and takes the hint that he’s not to answer.
Sophie hurries to say, “I have to agree with you, Mum. It’s very nice to be dining with our friends. We really need to do this more often.” She casts a covert glance at Tristan. Would you look at that? Maybe the queen got it right for one of us, after all.
Mary has finally served all her figs, and she’s moved to stand behind Ellery, who is whispering to her friend, Hailey. I’m guessing Mum invited the latter for Andrew. What she doesn’t realize is that my brother is too smart to get involved with any friend of Ellery’s.
This is a highly weird and uncomfortable dinner. Except for Sophie and Tristan, everyone appears to be trying too hard. Rigid posture and forced laughter seem to be the theme. Aside from Ellery’s agenda, I wonder what other plots and schemes are being hatched.
I try to focus on my roast duck while plotting how to get Lu alone so I can explain about the “Daddy” comment and the pictures in the paper. If she doesn’t believe me, then my hands are tied. Dating a royal has its downside, and nothing I can say or do will change that.
I’m starting to think this meal will never end when the side panel in the wall blows open and Lu’s mum, Sheila—who appears to be wearing pajamas with pink bunnies eating tacos on them— bursts out wielding her cell phone. “You bitch!” she shouts. She looks around the table trying to find her quarry. Yet, she doesn’t seem to know who it is.
Chapter Forty-One
Sheila
With the telephone pressed to her ear, Sheila listens to various dinner conversations. She hears King Alfred say, “Your mother truly only means to help.”
Alistair responds, “Yet she seems to have welcomed Ellery back into the fold. Which as you know, is no help at all.”
“She thought that maybe if you saw her, you’d realize you were over her and move on already.”
“Which I have,” Alistair says. “But now that Ellery is back, she seems intent on …”
The conversation abruptly ends when the server moves to a new location.
In hushed tones, a female voice says, “I told him about the baby.”
“You did what?” another woman demands. She lowers her voice and asks, “Why? I thought the whole point was to get him into the sack so you could convince him that the baby was his?”
“Believe me, if Alistair showed the least bit of interest in me, I would have done just that. But he seems adamant that we’re through.”
“So why did you think telling him about the baby would make things different?” the other woman wants to know.
“Alistair and I are birds of a feather. We both like varied pursuits and yet both of our families are pressuring us to get married. I thought I could offer him a deal that would suit us both in the end. He’ll marry someone his parents approve of, and then he can spend as much time as he wants with that American trollop.”
Lutéce
My mouth falls open and a piece of duck falls out when my mother appears out of nowhere. Not only is she wearing her pajamas but she’s calling someone out, big time. This is either really happening, or I’m drunk. I didn’t think I drank that much, yet maybe it’s time to remedy that. I down the rest of the wine in my glass in one dedicated gulp. Then I look back up and my mom is still there. Okay, this is really happening.
“Mom, what are you doing here?” I jump to my feet, nearly upsetting my wine glass.
She stares around the table looking for the person she just called a bitch—seriously, things have gotten surreal fast.
Mary points to Ellery, and from that moment on, all hell breaks loose. “You cannot pass your baby off as Alistair’s!” my mom yells.
Ellery looks highly uncomfortable being the center of negative attention, although I’m guessing she’s the kind of woman who otherwise relishes the spotlight. “I’m sorry, who are you and what baby are you talking about?”
She sounds convincing until my mom tells her, and everyone else at the table, “I heard it all!” She wields her cell phone in the air like she’s the Statue of Liberty and her Android is her torch. Are those bunny slippers on her feet? “I heard how you contacted the press and were going to make sure that you and Alistair were front page news as often as possible …”
But Ellery doesn’t let her finish. She turns to the queen and asks, “Ma’am, do you know who this crazy person is?”
“This is my dear friend, Sheila,” Queen Charlotte says, with a sharp edge to her voice.
“No offense to your friend, but what is she talking about?” Ellery has stepped in it now.
“Sheila was helping me discover the truth behind a nasty rumor I’d heard.” She takes what looks to be a fortifying sip of her wine. In other words, she slams back half the glass. Go, Queen Charlotte!
“Rumor?” Ellery’s face turns beet red. “What rumor?”
The queen pins her with a death stare—seriously, it rivals my mom’s—and says, “Duchess Pinkerton heard that you’d found yourself in the family way and were going to try to pawn off your baby as Alistair’s. I told her that I couldn’t imagine you would be so stupid. But then you called, wanting to get together, and I started to wonder. Especially after it’s clear you’ve been trapping him in photo ops with the press lately.”
Ellery looks between her friend—who is the same woman she was with at the fountain— and the queen, finally settling her gaze on her friend. She shouts, “You told your mother? Why would you do that?”
Looking uncomfortable, her friend answers, “I didn’t think she’d say anything. Mother is aware of the ways of court. I mean, my own brother isn’t my father’s …” Realizing she just confessed a family secret to the royal family, she jumps up and declares, “I have to go.” Then she runs out of the room.
Holy. Hell.
The king starts laughing before asking his wife, “Why didn’t you tell me what you were up to?”
She answers, “I didn’t want to cast further aspersions on Ellery’s character if it wasn’t warranted.” Ellery looks like she wants to run, too, but she doesn’t move.
“So, you set up this whole dinner, going so far as having Sheila help spy, so you could find out the truth? What if nothing came to light?”
“Darling,” the queen says, “something always comes to light.”
“You’ve done this before?” He sounds as gobsmacked as everyone at the table looks.
“That’s beside the point,” the queen tells him.
“What’s the point again?” he asks with shock etched on his face.
“The point is that we now know for certain that Ellery is up to no good. Which means”— she addresses Ellery—“it’s time for you to go. And as much as it pains me to say, it’s best if you keep your distance, indefinitely.”
This is like a soap opera. Cheating, fainting, secret babies and false paternity. All we need now is a good slap and someone to toss the table. I volunteer to do the slapping.
“You’re kicking me out without letting me explain?” She sounds panicked.
“Your actions are explanation enough. Please go.” Queen Charlo
tte turns to the server behind Ellery and says, “Mary, please show her the door.”
I can barely bring myself to look at Alistair, but I know I must. He’s staring right at me with a smug grin, yet he doesn’t say anything. I’m guessing I’ll be eating humble pie for dessert.
My mom sits down at Ellery’s former place at the table and pours herself a fresh glass of wine. She raises it toward the queen and says, “To us.”
The queen returns the gesture. “You’ve got that right.”
The entire table seems to reanimate as if nothing happened. It’s as though I never fainted, or Ellery wasn’t trying to trap Alistair. It’s as if my mother bursting out of the wall in her bunny attire before joining us for supper is perfectly normal behavior. The buzz of conversation ensues like none of that ever took place. Midway through dessert, I stand up and walk over to the vacant chair that once belonged to Ellery’s friend, the one right next to Mom.
“When did you get back?” I ask her.
“I never left, hon,” she confesses.
“What? Why?” Even while asking, I already know the answer. Some things never change. My mom will always meddle in my life.
“I couldn’t leave you here alone. What if you needed me?”
“I’m thirty-six, Mom. I’ve been taking care of myself for a long time now.” I roll my eyes.
“Yes, and you see where that’s gotten you?” she asks cockily.
“I was doing quite a good job of it,” I tell her, sounding annoyed.
“Hon, you were falling for a prince that was being maligned in the press, all the while wanting to adopt my first grandchild. Forgive me, but that all sounded like you needed your mother on hand in case something went wrong. Which it did. So, you’re welcome.” She takes a triumphant sip of her wine.
She’s got me there. Instead of holding onto my righteous indignation, I burst out laughing and tell her, “I can’t wait to introduce you to Beatrice.”
“I can’t wait to meet her!” she says excitedly.
Chapter Forty-Two
Queen Charlotte
“I’m sorry,” King Alfred says, pulling his wife into his arms.
“Whatever are you sorry for, dear?” she asks him.
“I’m sorry that I accused you of not minding your own business. Clearly, you knew exactly what you were doing.” He nuzzles the side of her neck.
“Of course, I did. I’ve known Ellery her whole life and her flaws have never been a secret to me. There is no way I would have encouraged either of our sons’ affections toward her again.”
“You were just using her to make Lu jealous?”
“I was using her to help Lu realize how deeply she feels for Alistair,” she tells him.
Taking her hand, he pulls her toward the stairs. “You scare me, woman. Let’s call it a night, shall we?”
“First of all, you have no reason to fear me. You are the most loyal and loving man I could ever have hoped to marry. Also, I’d love to go to bed. I hope you didn’t plan on going right to sleep.”
King Alfred’s eyes twinkle. “Perish the thought.”
Alistair
Lu walks over to me after our party disperses, which is right after dessert has been cleared. “I think I owe you an apology.”
“You think?”
“I definitely owe you an apology. But Alistair, before you get upset, you have to know that I’ve never dated someone in your position before.” Her eyelashes flutter prettily.
“Yet you’re from a famous family, so I’m sure you know the press’s penchant for getting things wrong, and others’ tendencies to lie when it suits them.” I’m not going to let her off the hook that easily.
“I do, and yet, I’m not famous, so I’ve never been the topic of their lies before.” She looks up at me and says, “I’m truly very sorry.”
I clear my throat loudly, then in a very stern tone, say, “Lutéce, I cannot be with someone who takes everyone else’s word over mine. I require real trust.”
“I know. I reacted out of fear, and that’s not okay. But in my defense, I’m scared to get involved with anyone again.” She looks like a lost little girl, and it breaks my heart.
“Well, then, I think that’s a question you need to ask and answer for yourself. Are you willing to put yourself out there one more time? Do you have the courage that will require? Because, Lu, anyone who dates me cannot lack courage.” I take a deep breath and add, “There will always be people who try to take me down. You cannot trust them over me.”
“I will do my very best,” she says softly.
The sadness in her eyes has me saying, “Then, of course, I forgive you. But if we are going to date each other, we have to always have an open line of communication.”
“I agree,” she says. “I have some things to overcome, but I promise while I do that, I will do my best not to try to make you pay for the misdeeds of others.”
“In the end, that’s all I can ask for.” I open my arms to her and welcome her in.
“I’m a little terrified of your mother.” Her words are muffled as I’m holding her closely.
“We all are,” I assure her. “Your mother seems to be quite a force of nature herself.”
I hear her giggle. “The good news is that now that we’ve found each other, they’ll hopefully direct their attentions elsewhere.”
“From your mouth to God’s ear,” I tell her. Then I take her hand and ask, “How about a nice walk in the garden?” Jokingly I add, “Unless you’d prefer my sisters’ company.” I’m referring to her first night in Malquar when she refused to let me show her the garden, but willingly went with my sisters.
Shaking her head, Lu shoots me a slow wink. “Claire mentioned that she and Geoffrey enjoyed their time in the orangery. Maybe we should go there instead?”
“Your wish is my command, madam.” I pull her alongside me through the great hall toward the corridor that leads to our destination. As I open the greenhouse door, I lead her right to the orange trees. “You do know that visiting the orangery is code for making out, don’t you?” I ask her.
“Um, yeah. I didn’t actually want to come here to eat oranges.”
“Before we get sidetracked,” I tell her, “I wanted to discuss the competition at the orphanage.”
“Oh, right, we’re supposed to pick a winner soon.” How in the world are we going to do that knowing that the children think the winner will be adopted?
“I was thinking that we might declare everyone a winner. I’ll cater a peanut butter and bacon sandwich luncheon for everyone to celebrate.”
“You’re going to make over forty sandwiches by yourself?”
“Well, no, not personally,” I tell her. “I figure I could show the kids how it’s done so that they can make them anytime they want.”
She nods her head. “It’s a nice idea. But what about Curtis? He’s got his hopes up.”
“Sister Hennepin says that she has an idea that might work. Apparently, she’s been talking to my mother,” I tell her.
“Oh, boy. If your mom is involved, I’m willing to bet my mom is involved and this could turn into a real production.”
“Yes. I have never known two more formidable women than our mothers. We’ve been asked to a meeting at the abbey the day after tomorrow.”
“At least we don’t have long to wait to find out what they’re cooking up,” she says.
“You could think of it like that, or you might consider that it gives us a full day to pack up and leave the country before our lives are turned upside down.”
Lu playfully nudges my arm. “No way. I’ve already decided to turn my life upside down by adopting Beatrice. I’m not about to walk away from that.”
“You’re going to be a great mom,” I tell her softly.
“I sure am going to do my best,” she dreamily replies.
“Not only that, but you’re going to live right here in Malquar.” I give her my most seductive look.
“At least for part of th
e year…” she says playfully.
“Not if I have anything to say about it. I’m going to make it my top priority to entice you to stay forever.”
“And yet we’re in the orangery and all you’ve done is talk.”
“Did you just drop the gauntlet? Because if you did,” I pull her onto my lap, “I’m prepared to show you all the benefits of staying.”
“Still talking …”
That’s it. Wrapping my arms around the sweetest, sexiest, most beautiful woman I have ever known, I stop talking.
Chapter Forty-Three
Sheila
“Tooty, Toots, I’m so glad you got here this soon!” Sheila wraps her arms around her sister and does a little dance. She doesn’t give her a chance to respond, she just declares, “You would not believe the dinner party last night!”
After dissecting the evening and sharing the good news that Ellery is out of the picture for good, Tooty says, “Hurry up and get dressed. Charlotte says we have a stop to make before meeting the kids at the orphanage.”
“I’m so excited, how about you?”
“I really am,” Tooty says. “Life never ceases to amaze me. Sometimes you spend years trying to attain something and you can never seem to get your hands on it. Then, other times, all you need to do is have a bare bones idea and bam! The universe gets busy and makes it happen.”
“What in the world have you always wanted that you didn’t get?” Sheila teases her sister. “You’ve got Country Music Awards, platinum records, a mansion in Tennessee, and a ski lodge in Aspen … Should I go on?”
“I would give that all up to share my life with someone that I loved and who loved me without reservation. You can have stuff until it comes out of your ears, but love is the only thing that truly fills you up.”
Sheila sighs. “You got me there. I think that maybe you’re the next one we need to find love for.”
“Yeah, because there are so many fantastic guys out there in their sixties looking for their soulmate.” Sarcasm pours out of her.
You're So Vain: A Royal Haters to Lovers Romance (Seven Brides for Seven Mothers Book 4) Page 21