“Okay…” I say, twisting my hands again, “You know I’m not an actress, right?”
“We know,” Scott says, giving me an understanding smile. “Just try to look determined, and like you’re trying to fight off your emotions. In this scene, we’re going to be interspersing shots of the dancing with a few of you having a moment of weakness, which we’ll coach you on when we’re ready to shoot it.”
“Whew… okay,” I say, blowing out a breath, feeling nervous all over again. I take a moment to look out over the rows of seats, up at the lights, down at the orchestra pit, taking it all in. I’ve never actually been here before; it’s beautiful. After a few seconds, I turn back to see that Ron and Scott are seated in their directors’ chairs, but also that Jack is standing with them. He’s dressed in grey slacks with a chain dangling off one hip, and a black button-down with the sleeves rolled partially up his forearms. He’s wearing a chain around his neck, and his hair is his usual sexy-messy. I think I’ll ask him not to change later. Matt calls him back over to the band set-up, and I decide I should quit ogling him and get my head in the game. This is exciting, working together, but it’s still a job. For both of us. This video could help determine how fast the band hits the pavement, and I want to give them my best, which means taking this seriously. I shake out my shoulders and my arms, and as soon as Scott asks if I’m ready, I’m able to confidently say that I am. Once the song is playing and the camera is rolling, I feel good about how I’m performing. I’m hitting the moves extra hard, keeping my pirouettes tight, and giving my jumps some good height.
“Cut!” I hear, and I stop. Anita comes over to hand me a bottle of water, and starts sponging makeup on my forehead, which must be starting to glisten. I see that Scott is heading over to Jack, and Ron is approaching me.
“Good job. You were looking really determined. Listen, Scott’s having another camera brought in so we can do a little shooting of the band with you simultaneously.”
“Oh,” I say nodding.” To save time?”
“In a way,” Ron says, nodding and shrugging. “Listen, what you’re doing is exactly what Scott wants. Keep that ferocity going with this next take. Focus on that.”
“I can do that,” I say, keeping my disposition all business.
“Alright,” Ron says, low-fiving me. “Scott’s got me on you, so he can focus on the guys. I’m no director, but if we keep it as simple as me saying ‘action’ and you dancing your ass off, we’ve got this.”
“We’ve got this,” I repeat, reassuringly.
Jack
I’m still not totally comprehending what’s going on here, but I’m going with it. We’re lucky to be here, and I’m not questioning anything. We are all ready to go; Chris is behind his drum set, and the rest of us have our guitars slung on, just waiting for Scott to lead the charge.
“Alright guys, get in the zone and play your asses off like you’re performing at the Grammys. As for you, Jack…” he steps closer and lowers his voice. “Eyes on Mayzie.” No challenge there, I think to myself, and as I hear the countdown, I realize- he saw me watching her.
As the song starts and I hear ‘action’, I play, or rather pretend to, the way I always do. I jerk my guitar around, I sway my hips, all the while watching as Mayzie dances, a lot like I saw her in the studio that night. Only difference is that she looks more focused than upset. Like Scott instructed, I keep watching her as we go through the song a couple of times. I’m amazed by her once again, as I see the serious set of her face, and I just can’t believe I’m with someone who can move like that. When he’s satisfied, Scott finally cuts, and tells us to take five. Apparently, the plan is to shoot more of Mayzie before letting her off for the day, and then wrapping up by shooting a little more of the band on stage. For that, Scott wants us to play like we normally would at The Cedar, feeding off each other’s vibes and whatnot.
I look over at Mayzie, who’s drinking from a water bottle, and decide to walk over to see her for a minute before they throw her back at it again. She greets me with that smile I’m crazy about, and my arms automatically open.
“Can I give you hug?” I ask, not waiting for an answer as I wrap my arms around her back and pull her against me.
“Always,” she says, putting her arms around my neck. We’ve both been working hard today and keeping things professional, but we’re technically on a break, and I feel like we’ve earned a moment together.
“You look amazing,” I say in her ear, as I cuddle her close.
“Ha,” she says, with a self-deprecating chuckle. “Have you checked out a mirror?”
“Oh, you like this?” I ask, leaning back just enough to look at her face.
“It’s pretty hot,” she says, lifting an eyebrow. It’s right then that we’re interrupted by Scott, hollering to Mayzie and the crew that they’re getting back to work in one minute.
“Good timing,” I say, as I release her. “These pants don’t hide much.”
She blushes and laughs as I walk away, letting her get back to it.
Mayzie
I’m still hell bent on being serious and professional for the good of the video, but that little visit from Jack was so good for me. I love when he makes gestures like that, showing me he cares.
“Alright Mayzie, you’ve reached the home stretch,” Scott says, stepping in front of me to go over what he wants for the next take. “We’ve got all we want of the dancing, so for this last part we’re just going to film you looking like you’re fighting with your emotions. We’re going for a look of frustration mostly, like you’re dissatisfied with your moves or something else going on in life, it doesn’t matter. We just want to capture a look of struggle. Some pacing would be good…” he trails off, looking at me as if he’s trying to see if I get what he’s saying.
“Okay,” I say, shrugging. “I’ll see what I can do.”
“Just do your best,” he says, going to sit behind the camera. This is going to be hard after I just had Jack give my spirits a boost mere moments ago. When the music starts and the cameras are rolling, I start pacing, like Scott suggested. I try to conjure up scenarios that annoy me. Olives on pizza. I shudder. Groupies. I throw my hands down. My entire college experience. I run my hands through my hair. I continue on like this for a while, until Scott tells me to sit on the edge of the stage, lean back on my hands and just look around the theater with wonder and interest. They are certainly going for a myriad of emotions in this video. When I hear the final ‘cut,’ I lay back on the stage with relief.
18
Jack
It was a hectic week what with the trip out to New York to record the song, working two nights in a row, then that long haul of a video shoot, and then working another two nights in a row over the weekend. It was crazy for Mayzie and me, in different ways. While the song recording wiped me out, making the video demanded more from her, physically. Plus, she’s kept busy with working and dancing. Bottom line, we both need to decompress. I have the next two days off, and I want to get away with her.
One thing my dad told me that he used to do with my mom, is that they would look on a map and find a town that they’d never been to. They’d keep it to a reasonable driving distance and take a day trip to go check it out. They’d have no agenda, and he said it was a good way to do something new, and it was relaxing at the same time. I want to do that with Mayzie.
When I call her from work to see what she thinks, she loves the idea, and I can hear excitement in her voice. She lets me go so she can finish up some work so that she’ll be free to go with me.
The next morning, I load Trooper into the truck and head over to get Maze. After looking at a map, and looking up some of the towns on the internet, we make our decision, load up the dogs, and hit the road.
Mayzie
After just about an hour and a half of driving, we exit off the interstate and follow the signs to Applebrook. We drive through the main drag, which doesn't take long as this town is tiny, but so charming. There are lit
tle cafés, antique shops, and an old-fashioned ice cream parlor. The street has plenty of trees in between, and I also notice a few buildings like a town hall and a church that are extremely old, but well taken care of. I love when old buildings are kept around, giving a town an historic feel, along with some character. We find a place under the trees near the end of the street to park the truck, leaving each dog a bone and lowering the windows. We've agreed to explore for an hour and get lunch, before coming back to get them and take them walking. It's amazing how checking out a new town can be so fun and relaxing. Jack and I leisurely walk down the street, window shopping and ducking into antique stores. We even find an old music shop, that of course, Jack has to play in, which is fun to watch. I like seeing him get excited and intrigued over some of the old classic instruments. After a while, we decide to grab sandwiches from a small deli, in the hopes of picnicking somewhere. We ask the clerk if there is a park nearby so we can take the dogs on a walk. The guy points in the direction we're parked, and says that if we turn right at the next street and go up a couple of blocks, there is a big sprawling park, where people don't really care if you take your dogs off-leash.
"I've never seen you two around here. Visiting?" You can tell it's one of those towns where everybody knows everybody.
"Yeah," Jack answers as we gather our sandwiches and some napkins. "Just thought we'd get out of the city for a day."
"Good for you, I'm glad you chose our little town to come unwind. You and your dogs will love that park. There're trails, plenty of trees, and it's even got an open field with a big hill that has a nice view." We thank him and head out the door, its bell tinkling as we leave. Once we get Trooper and Penny out of the truck, we walk in the direction the clerk told us, the dogs pulling us along, grateful for the exercise. The clerk wasn't lying; it's a beautiful park. We reach it within five minutes of walking, and let ourselves in through an old gate. After enjoying our lunch at a table under a tree, we unleash the dogs to let them gallivant around as we explore the trails. There are beautiful trees all around, and we even come across a tiny wooden bridge built over a stream. We make sure to take pictures here and there, because this day is turning out to be so memorable. It's not like we're doing much besides enjoying each other and our surroundings, but it seems so special and intimate, like one of those days we'll always reminisce on.
We keep walking, switching from talking about everything, to comfortable silence, to talking again, until the trees open up to the field the clerk was talking about. It's pretty wide and full of tall grass, and sure enough, there’s a hill, although it isn't huge. We decide to walk up to the top, just to see what the view really is like. It's easy enough to walk up as there isn’t much of an incline. The dogs beat us to the top of course, their energy having no end in sight. They continue to sniff, explore, and chase each other as we reach the top. From there, we can't really see the town or even the tops of the trees, but if we look straight out from where we walked, there is more field, with more tall grass with a few red and blue wildflowers sprinkled in. In the afternoon sun, the grass glows a hazy yellow that I think makes it look pretty and peaceful, along with the slight breeze up here.
“It’s so pretty,” I say, as Jack ambles up to me and pulls me against him. We take in the view, and watch our dogs running around. He doesn’t respond, only smiles down at me. He starts humming the melody of the song he wrote me, the one that’s only ours, and starts gently swaying us.
“I love that song,” I say, with a lighthearted and contented giggle.
This moment takes my breath away, and all I can think is how I want to find a way to preserve it, making it last forever. I feel a warmth spreading through my chest, and I can envision my heart glowing a soft pink.
“I was thinking…” he starts, “how much I loved waking up with you after that first night we spent together, and how amazing it was to come home to you after going to New York. It made me want to add a few extra lines…”
I look up at him with my eyebrows raised, cuing him to lay them on me.
“You’re the one thing my soul needs to breathe,
The one thing that my heart believes
Take my hand, let’s leave tonight
And be together in the morning light
Oh, every morning light
Our forever can start tonight”
Oh my God. I swear, those words plunge into the deep abyss of my soul.
“What do you think?” he asks.
“I think you’re extraordinary.”
"You love me?" he asks.
"I love you, Jack."
“Enough to maybe spend every night with me? Every morning?” His face is soft yet serious, looking me right in my eyes as he asks me this. I'm kind of confused.
"Are you saying you want to live together?"
"No. I want to marry you, Maze." A huge gasp comes up my throat. My heart starts pounding in my ears as I try to get a grip and figure out if he really just said that. The air is quickly leaving my lungs, and I can't find any words.
"Jack..." is all I can manage. And then he drops down to a knee. Okay, so he really did just say that. My hands cover my mouth as I look up at the sky, my new focus being trying not to pass out. Is this really happening, or am I dreaming? I must be dreaming. Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh...
"Can you stop freaking out and look at me? Look at me baby, just breathe." Even though Jack's voice sounds like it's coming from a parallel universe, I do as he says. I draw in a big breath, pulling some much-needed air into my lungs, and look down at him. A few strands of hair are in his eyes but I can see the passion in his stare, and it seems to center me. Barely. He puts his other knee down so that he's kneeling on both and puts his hands on my hips. "Before I met you, I was asleep. I was on autopilot. When you smiled at me, it gave me a spark. It jump-started me and it was like I was coming back to life, or coming out of a fog. You started building me up immediately and you haven't stopped since. I know, more than anything, that my heart belongs to you, and so do I. There's no question. Please marry me, Mayzie. I promise you I'll always protect you, in every way, and show you every day how much I love you." I take a moment to let his words wash over me, seeping into my skin, my bones, and my soul. He wants to marry me. He loves me, he wants to get married. I love him so much, and I…
I look down into his eyes and just barely squeak out, "Yes." Oh my God, my heart is in my throat.
"Yes?" he asks, searching my eyes.
"Yes,” I say with firm confidence. I want this, and I want him to know it and not have to question it. Even though I'm still kind of swaying unsteadily, I nod vigorously, looking him in the eye. “Yes.”
He stands quickly, taking my face in his hands and kissing me. It’s warm and soft, deep and long, and I never want to come up for air. When we finally break our lips from each other, I wrap my arms around his neck, just wanting to stay in this moment, drawing it out as long as possible; to take it in completely, and let it consume me.
“Mayzie?” Jack speaks in my ear.
“Yeah?” I answer dreamily.
“I want to do it now,” he says.
Jack
I know, you all think I’m crazy right now, and maybe I am, just a little bit. I am crazy in love with her, and being with her for the rest of my life is something I both want, and need. I knew, the first time I talked to her, that she was going to be special to me. I knew the first time I saw her dance that she was someone who could take care of herself, but that I wanted to be the one to do it. I knew, when she was the first person I wanted to tell about the label, that she was my partner. When I was losing my mind about it and she brought me back to earth without batting an eye, I knew she was a rare soul that my life could no longer be without. I knew the first time I made love with her, like I hadn’t with anyone else ever before, that we belonged to each other, that there could be nobody else for me ever again. Before her, the only time I felt alive was when I was playing my heart out on my guitar. All the times in between,
I just drifted through life. Now with her in my life, I’m actually living. My life has joy, excitement… love. She brought me those things. Like the sun shedding light on my life after I’d been in the dark for so long, she brightened my entire world just by walking up to me. She’s a gift that I don’t deserve, but I’ll be damned if I let go of it. She’s laughter, spunk, and compassion, wrapped up in a package that I vow to try every day to deserve. And I don’t want to wait, I don’t want to plan. I want it to be her and me, forever.
Mayzie
He's crazy. He has absolutely, no question about it, lost his damn mind. And so have I, because I’m standing in the little bathroom in the darling chapel at the end of the main street, zipping up the side of a white lace dress.
It’s ok. I will go crazy right alongside him if it means I get to keep feeling this. This feeling is indescribable, but I will give it my best shot: it’s heart swelling; its butterflies bursting out of my heart and fluttering throughout the rest of my body; it’s fireworks; it’s floating through the clouds; it’s knowing I’ve found someone who will always lift me up, love me, support me, and guard my heart like it’s a treasure. I felt so lost before he came along, like I didn’t even know who I really was. And in his own beautifully unique way, he showed me. Like the way the moon can guide people home in the dark. While I think we’re both certifiable by doing this so suddenly, I’ll take it. Jack blindsided me with this idea at first, that’s for sure. I was stunned, dumbfounded… you name it. But looking at this man I love, as he’s telling me he wants me forever, starting right now… I realized I didn’t need any time to be sure. Now or later, all of a sudden didn’t matter.
See Her (Turn it Up Book 1) Page 17