Guilt hit her again as she realized that calling Edmund to tell him that she was going to the beach with another man probably wasn’t what they’d had in mind when they’d spent their hard-earned money on the card.
But since this conversation affected the rest of her life, she thought that it maybe was an emergency. At least it felt that way to her, especially since her best friends in the world had determined that Leona make this call.
After three rings, a somewhat distracted voice answered. “Hello?”
It was Edmund. Leona gulped. Well, she surely hadn’t imagined that he would be the one to actually pick up the phone.
And now that he’d answered, what in the world was she actually going to say? How did one start this conversation?
“Hello?” he asked again, his voice sounding irritated.
“Hi, Edmund,” she said in a rush. “It’s me.”
“Yes?” His voice wasn’t exactly warm or welcoming.
Maybe he wasn’t sure who it was? “You know, Leona.”
“I know it’s you, Leona.”
“Oh.” Again, she had hoped he would sound a little happier to talk to her.
“What did you need?”
What did she need? That was all he had to say after not speaking to her for four or five days? For some reason, that response gave her a bit of a backbone.
Danke, Gott.
“I don’t need anything, Edmund,” she said a bit tartly, matching his tone. “I simply called to check in with you.”
“Oh.”
“Jah.” Her mouth went dry. This was obviously going to be even more difficult than she’d imagined it would be. “So. How are you?”
“I am fine.”
As silence filled the empty space between them, Leona curled her finger around the telephone cord and realized that he hadn’t asked about her. As a matter of fact, so far, he sounded as if her phone call was nothing more than an interruption to his day. Feeling more uneasy—and a whole lot less guilty than she had just a few minutes before—she got down to business. “Edmund, I wanted to let you know that a man asked me to go to the beach tomorrow.”
“What did you tell him?”
“I, um, told him I would go.”
“You did?” He sounded incredulous. Finally, there was some emotion.
“Jah. It sounded like fun. I didn’t want to pass up the chance to see Siesta Key with a local. They know all the best places to go.”
The minute she said those words, she realized that she hadn’t quite done her motivations justice. Yes, she did want to see the beach, but what she really wanted was to get to know Zack Kaufmann better. Even if she never saw him again after the day at the beach, Leona knew she needed to spend time with a man who was so different than Edmund.
“I’m not pleased to hear this news, Leona.”
“I didn’t think you would.”
“Then why did you say you would go?” He paused. “Are you going to let him court you?”
His words sounded so judgmental. And a bit scary. So she added, “He isn’t courting me. It’s nothing like that.”
“It sounds like it.”
Did it? Had she quickly said yes to something that was far more significant than she’d given it credit for being?
“I don’t think Zack and I are going to go alone. Mattie and Sara will most likely go. As well some of his friends.”
“Zack?”
“Jah. It’s short for Zachary. I mean, Zachariah.” The minute she uttered those words, she wished she could have swallowed them. Too much information!
“It sounds to me like you’re going on a date, Leona.”
“Well, I suppose it is.” She closed her eyes. Mattie had been right. There was no way she should have even considered not telling Edmund about her trip to Siesta Key.
She must have been in a fog when she’d told herself that Edmund would only treat her news with indifference. Had she really imagined he would accept her news as if it didn’t concern him one bit?
“Why on earth would you make these plans?” he nearly shouted in her ear.
“Um . . .”
“Why would you even be talking to men?” he continued. “You are an engaged woman, Leona.”
“I know.”
“Well, then?”
Oh, but Edmund sounded mad. And not mad in an irritated-for-interrupting-his-evening kind of mad. No, this was him being very much put out with her.
Rather surprised at his response, and feeling lower than a snake in the grass, she struggled with a response. “Like I told you, a day at the beach sounds like fun.” Yet even to her ears, it was a terrible excuse.
“Leona, you and I both know you didn’t say yes because you wanted to go to the beach.”
He was exactly right. And she owed him the truth. Gathering her courage, she tried to explain herself. “Edmund, I have to admit that I also told Zack I would go because of everything that has been happening between you and me.”
“Nothing has happened.”
That was kind of the point, she realized. They weren’t growing. Instead, he kept making decisions and she kept trying to appease him. “Edmund, you know I’ve been unhappy. You know I have been wondering about our future.” She didn’t bother to start listing all the times she’d attempted to start a conversation with him about her concerns. Surely, he remembered them just as clearly?
A disparaging noise slid through the phone line. “Honestly? You want to talk about the future now? While we’re sitting hundreds of miles from each other?”
“Well, jah. Actually, I’m a bit surprised that you even remembered I’ve been worried about our future. Why, every time I bring up my concerns about our compatibility, you push them aside.”
“Because your concerns aren’t relevant.”
“Well, um, they’re an issue to me. How could you say my feelings aren’t important to you?”
He sighed. “Obviously you are suffering from a case of nerves. Don’t forget, our relationship is no fly-by-night type of thing. I courted you properly.”
“Jah, I know that.”
“When it was time, I asked you to be my wife. You said yes right away. Do you remember that?”
No longer able to continue to sit, she jumped to her feet. “Of course I do.”
“Then how could you throw that away?”
She closed her eyes. “Edmund, you are exactly right about my part. I did say yes. I should not be thinking about anything else.” A new surge of guilt and anxiety rolled through her. What was she doing? She’d given a man a promise! Everyone was making wedding plans! Mattie had been planning for them to be sisters.
She really needed to get her act together and tell Zack that she couldn’t go to the beach with him. And then she was going to need to stay away from him. Stay away from that church, too.
“Edmund, listen. I—”
He interrupted her. “I’m not sure what is going on with you, but I had hoped being around Mattie and Sara might have had a calming influence.”
Abruptly, she tossed her new decision to the floor. “Calming?” she bit out. Had he even met his sister Mattie? She was the opposite of calm! And for that matter, why did he actually think that she needed someone to calm her down? She was one of the most unflappable people she’d ever met.
Well, until lately.
He continued on. “Since you’re still struggling, you need to listen to me, Leona. My mother said all engaged couples experience second thoughts. It’s natural. The excitement of courting and the engagement announcement wears off, and it’s replaced by wedding preparations and stress.”
“You’ve been speaking to your mother about me?”
“Of course. She said you’re going to get back to yourself as soon as the wedding is over. She said sometimes brides have a difficult time dealing with all the pressure and plans.”
“Boy, thank goodness you talked to your mamm about my moods. Did she mention anything else?” she said sarcastically.
He ignored h
er jab. “I truly feel you’re going to regret your impetuousness, and probably sooner than later. This means you need to cancel your plans, Leona. I’m sorry you let your emotions get the best of you, but I guess it couldn’t be helped. You do tend to jump into things without much forethought.”
Since agreeing to marry him was a good example of this, she wasn’t all that pleased that he brought it up. “Hey, now—”
“My mamm said you’ll probably be having second thoughts when you are carrying a baby, too. Hormones, you know.”
Leona almost laughed. Edmund, the man who would hardly talk to her about the possibility of owning a dog or cat, was now chatting about them having a baby. And her hormones! It would have been horribly embarrassing if she wasn’t so peeved.
“You talked to your mother about me being pregnant?”
Edmund skillfully ignored her irritation again.
“She’s been a great help, Leona. I’m sure she will be helpful to you in the future, too. She said I’ll be used to your mood swings by the time we are expecting.”
“Mood swings?”
“Jah. It’s what we’ve been talking about, Leona. Your hormones.”
Reaching out, she pressed her hand on the wall, practically bracing herself for what had to be one of the most uncomfortable conversations she’d ever had in her life. “I do not want to discuss hormones with you, Edmund. Ever.”
“Then I suggest you stop making such impulsive decisions.”
That would be the smart thing, if she was solely concerned about making sure he was happy with her for the evening.
But she was thinking about a lifetime. And she just wasn’t sure. “I am not.”
“If you make this choice, we are finished.”
Finished. He’d just threatened to end their relationship as calmly and quietly as if he was changing his mind about what he wanted to eat for dinner.
And though she’d often thought he was heavy-handed and had too many concerns about how happy she was going to be married to him . . . she was shocked. “Edmund, you would break up with me over the phone? You don’t want to wait until I come back from Pinecraft?”
“I’m not the one who has doubts and regrets. You are, Leona. Remember, this is your doing. You called me. However, now that you have decided to see other men, I realize I have doubts, too. Serious ones.”
This was her doing. He was going to put the blame for the breakup on her shoulders. “Then I guess we’re breaking up.”
“You’re not going to change your mind? You’re still going to go to the beach with this man?”
“Jah.” Even to her ears, her voice sounded hoarse and harsh. Like the wind had gotten knocked out of her.
She waited a second, half hoping that he was suddenly going to start apologizing, start telling her that he wanted things to change, that he wanted her to be happy. That everything she was asking for wasn’t too much to ask.
But he didn’t.
“I guess this is goodbye, then,” she murmured, feeling like a stranger. “I’ll call my mother to tell her that the wedding is off. I trust you will do the same with your parents.”
“You needn’t worry about me informing my parents.”
He sounded as bitter as she felt. Without a doubt, he would tell his parents that she’d strayed.
He would no doubt tell everyone in their church district that he was the innocent party.
“Goodbye,” she said before hanging up.
Then, still feeling the sting of that conversation, and before she chickened out, Leona picked up the phone. Intending to call her parents and her sisters, Rosanna and Naomi, too.
It was better to disappoint her fiancé, her fiancé’s sister, her cousin, her parents, and her sisters all at one time. Then, hopefully, she would be able to find a quiet place to go cry. And then cry some more.
Chapter 12
Who do you think is going to show today?” Danny asked Zack as they walked to the SCAT—Sarasota County Area Transit—bus stop.
Zack shrugged. “I don’t have any idea. I thought that for sure both of her girlfriends would want to come, but from the way they were glaring at us last night, I started to get the feeling that they were unhappy about Leona talking to me.”
Danny grunted. “Those girls must have been taking lessons from my sisters. They’re always unhappy about something.”
“True,” he said, enjoying the opportunity to give Danny grief about his sisters, who everyone far and wide knew were his constant source of pain. “They’re unhappy with you pretty much all the time.”
“Like I said, they’re mighty trying on a man’s patience.”
“Not at all. They seem to get along great with everyone else,” Zack said around a grin.
Danny grimaced. “I irritate them as much as they irritate me. We can’t seem to help ourselves.”
Zack grinned but didn’t say anything more on the subject. Danny had the misfortune of having four sisters. Somehow, the Lord had seen fit for him to be born smack in the middle, too. That meant that he had two who bossed him around and another two who tried their best to boss him around.
To make matters worse, his mother—although a mighty nice lady, to be sure—adored her girls and never would hear of anything critical about them. Their household was always abuzz with talk about cooking, diets, boys, and all sorts of other things girls liked to talk about. “It’s no wonder that you’re such a good fisherman. If I were you, I’d be fishing all the time.”
“Daed says we are truly blessed to live in Florida. The plentiful fish in the Gulf are his saving grace.” His smile broadened. “Not that he’d ever tell Mamm or my sisters that!”
They were almost at the bus stop. The bus came every hour, and it was pretty obvious that they weren’t the only people planning to spend the day at Siesta Key. All around them were men and women about their age holding canvas tote bags likely filled with sandwiches, towels, drinks, and sunscreen.
As they approached, he scanned the crowd for Leona.
“See her yet?”
“Nope.”
Danny pulled out his cell phone to check the time. His parents and the bishop had allowed him to have it since he needed one for his job, but he’d told Zack more than once that he used it as his watch as much as he did to make phone calls. “We’ve got less than ten minutes.”
“Ten minutes is a pretty long time. I bet she doesn’t want to get here too early.”
“Maybe not.” Danny slipped his phone back in a pocket, then smiled at a couple of their friends. “I’m gonna go say hi to Adam.”
Zack nodded, then retreated to lean against the fence that divided the stop from some private property. It was getting so crowded that he wanted to stay out of the way but still be able to see Leona when she approached.
Unfortunately, as the minutes passed, he didn’t see the slightest glimpse of her. He was beginning to get worried.
Maybe she was standing him up. Part of him wouldn’t be surprised if she did. After all, she was only in town for a vacation. Maybe she started having second thoughts about spending the day with a man she didn’t know all that well and would likely never see again after she left.
He’d be disappointed about that, but, he supposed, he could understand. Just thinking about his little sister contemplating spending the whole day with a man no one in her family knew made him grind his teeth.
Besides, if Leona’s girlfriends didn’t think it was a gut idea for her to be with him, Zack felt pretty certain it would be another mark against him. Girls seemed to only want to do things in groups. She might think that keeping them happy was far more important than keeping a date with him.
Looking right and left, Zack scanned the crowd yet again, searching for the wholesome-looking girl with the striking brown eyes and golden hair.
He still didn’t see her.
He swallowed back a lump of regret. He wasn’t going to be devastated if she didn’t show up, but, boy, was he going to be disappointed.
; “Any luck?” Danny asked when he returned to his side.
“Nope.”
“If she don’t show, do you still want to go to the beach?”
Part of him didn’t. He had plenty to do, and he usually never went to the beach with just one friend. It was a lot better to go in a group.
But he’d already roped Danny into it. “If you want to go, we can. We can hang out with Adam and his friends.” Trying to warm up to the idea, he added, “We can go for a few hours, then head back early, no worse for wear.”
“Just with better tans,” Danny quipped.
“Exactly,” he said with a smile, then resumed his scan of the crowd.
Still no luck. And to make matters worse, their bus was looming in the distance, no less than four stoplights away. He needed to resign himself to the idea that she had changed her mind. Well, he shouldn’t have gotten his hopes up.
Danny stuffed his hands into his pockets. “Should I tell those guys that we’re still going?”
Zack scanned a group of girls who were walking up the sidewalk. They were all about Leona’s age, and one even had golden hair like she did. But as they got closer, he noticed that they wore pleats in their skirts. They were from Indiana, not Holmes County.
She wasn’t here.
Turning to Danny, he nodded. “Yeah, tell them that we’ll hang out with them. Maybe we can play volleyball or something.” They weren’t his close friends, but they were nice guys.
But just as Danny was about to turn back, he elbowed Zack in the ribs. “Ha! Looks like we won’t be hanging out with Adam and his buddies after all.” With a smirk, Danny pointed to their left. “Look who is walking up the sidewalk.”
Zack turned, then stared. There was Leona, wearing a pretty turquoise-colored short-sleeved dress. Her eyes were glowing, and a smile played on her lips. Next to her was one of her friends, the girl with the auburn hair and freckles.
“What do you know?” Danny murmured. “Mattie came, too.”
“Were you hoping she’d come?”
Danny didn’t meet his gaze. “I didn’t say that.”
Instead of questioning his buddy, Zack pushed off from the fence and wound his way through the maze of people. “Hey, Leona,” he said when he got close. “You made it.”
The Promise of Palm Grove Page 8