by Marie Tuhart
Jed took a deep breath and let it out. Ry had gone into Master mode and he knew better than to argue with him. “What do we do?”
“Since it’s Friday, we pick her up and get her to talk.”
“Sounds easy, but why do I think it isn’t going to be?”
“Because Katie is a stubborn subbie. We have ways of making her talk.” Ry grinned at him. “Besides, it’s time to take the relationship to the next level. She needs to understand she can trust us to not only satisfy her but also to keep her safe, even from us.”
****
After a couple of hours of huddling on the couch, Katie dragged herself upstairs to take a shower. Once it was done, she curled up in her bed. She couldn’t stop shaking.
She trusted Ry and Jed, but just the thought of someone else seeing her naked and restrained sent a shaft of fear straight to her heart. They promised to keep her safe, but they couldn’t control everything. At the clubs she never removed her clothing, so her fear had been muted. Was it being unclothed in front of strangers? But Mike wasn’t a stranger. She’d known him in high school. They’d been science partners. Oh, hell, what was going on with her?
She closed her eyes and concentrated on her breathing. Deep breath in, then let it out. She continued her mantra until her muscles slowly started to relax.
“Katie, sweetheart.”
“Gran?” Katie blinked, bringing her grandmother’s concerned face into focus. There were shadows on the walls that weren’t there before. She’d fallen asleep.
“Sorry to wake you, but Ry and Jed are here.”
“What?” She sat up clutching the covers to her chest as she glanced at the clock. It was seven? “I...” She swallowed. “I’m not feeling well, Gran. Can you let them know?”
Gran frowned. “Sure, sweetie. Do you want some soup or something to eat?”
Her stomach rolled. “No, Gran. I’m just going to go back to sleep. I’m sure I’ll be fine by tomorrow.” She lay back down as her grandmother left the room.
Several minutes later, she heard an engine roar in the driveway, and she listened to it fade away. She let out a breath and snuggled down into the covers. She’d been afraid Ry and Jed would come storming up to her room.
Part of her rejoiced they hadn’t, but the other half wished they would have. Her bedroom door opened, and she jumped.
Gran stood in the doorway. “Ry said to let you know they expect you at their house at four tomorrow afternoon. And if you’re still sick in the morning to call.”
“Thanks, Gran.” Katie closed her eyes. She had until tomorrow to figure out how to deal with this fear.
Chapter Seven
Ry opened the front door at four the next afternoon. Katie stood on the porch, and his heart almost stopped. Her face was drawn, and her eyes were overly bright as if she were fighting back tears.
“Hey, Katie.” He made his voice cheerful as he stood back and let her in.
He’d been afraid she wouldn’t show up. But she had. Her smile was forced. Not good.
“Ry.”
His stomach cramped with her one word answer. His dominant side roared to life. Slipping his hand up her neck, he fisted his hand in her hair and tugged until he could stare into her eyes.
Her lashes started to lower.
“Look at me.”
Her eyes opened wide.
“That’s it, baby. Let it go. Let us take control.” He could see it in her gaze, the fight in whether to submit or not.
A tremor racked her body, and he loosened his grip on her hair. “Can you do that, Katie? Today, while you’re here with us, you’ll give us total and complete control over you?”
“I...” Her tongue darted out and wet her lips. She started to nod.
“No, Katie.” His fingers tightened in her hair. “I need words. I need to hear it from your lips.”
“Yes, Sir.”
“Yes, Sir, what?”
“Yes, Sir, please take total control over me. I need it.”
His heart cracked. He loved her honesty about what she needed. It was another thing he loved about her. Loved? Yes, loved. The idea didn’t scare Ry; it only made him more determined to show her how good the three of them were together.
Another tremor shook her frame. “You are so brave, sweetheart.” He brushed a kiss over her lips. “I’m honored by your submission.” Ry glanced across the room to Jed. “Are you okay with this?”
“After we talk about what happened yesterday,” Jed said.
“Fuck,” she muttered.
Ry tried not to grin at her whispered curse but failed. “Behave.” He gave her a swat on her ass.
“Yes, Sir.”
“Go down to the dungeon; we’ll be along shortly.” He released her.
She turned and made her way to the door, opened it, and disappeared.
“Shit,” Jed said.
“Yeah.” Ry rubbed his eyes. “Whatever is bothering her is not going to be easy to get out of her.”
“I have to know, Ry.”
“We both do, Jed. We can’t have her running away without talking things through with us when she’s scared. We need to find out what caused her reaction yesterday so we can move forward.”
****
Katie sighed as she put on the sheer nightgown they had laid out on the bed for her. Hell, why even bother since she was practically naked. She shook her head. This is what they wanted. It was what she wanted. She’d wrestled with her inner demons all day yesterday and had come to several conclusions.
Despite her panic, she trusted Ry and Jed to protect her from prying eyes. Her fear of being seen by others while she was in a submissive role came from what she witnessed with her father and Walter. What they had done to that woman wasn’t good BDSM. Ry and Jed practiced safe, sane, and consensual. Plus they were risk aware of what they were doing when she submitted to them.
Also, she was very aware she wanted to give her control over to Ry and Jed, as it was part of who she was. It had never been that way with anyone else but them. Once she’d come to her decision, she had begun to relax.
Until she stepped up on the porch. Her hands had shook and her stomach had clenched. Then Ry opened the door and asked her to let them take control. All her fear practically melted away. They still wanted her. She hadn’t even realized she was afraid they’d reject her until that moment.
She slipped on the nightgown then took her position and waited. She didn’t want to talk about yesterday, but they weren’t going to let her off the hook that easily. She’d slept all night, and this morning when she woke, she knew she’d have to face them and explain what happened.
Heavy footsteps on the stairs caused her to stiffen. Then they became muffled as the guys stepped onto the matted flooring.
“Beautiful,” Jed whispered.
“Fucking gorgeous,” Ry said.
A rush of pleasure flowed over her at their words. Was that it? Did she want their approval? Yes, she did. Not many people had given her approval in her life, but now these two gave it to her, and it warmed her heart. But she also wanted their love and understanding. Love? Oh, hell. Her breath caught in her throat. She did want their love, because they were the only ones outside of her Gran who mattered to her.
“Look at us, sweetheart,” Ry commanded.
Her gaze went to them. They were standing just to her right, both of them in sweat pants and nothing else. But they were tense, their arms held stiff at their sides and shoulders rigid.
“Come to us,” Jed said.
Katie did, and when she got to the two men, her bones grew weak. It was all there for her to see in their eyes, their expressions, they way they held themselves. They wanted to keep her safe, even from them if necessary. Raising her arms, she wrapped one around Jed’s neck and the other around Ry’s neck. Then she pulled the two men into her embrace.
They placed their hands on her waist. She soaked up their warmth and their power, but most of all, their love and desire.
“What happe
ned yesterday, Katie?” Jed asked.
“Do we have to talk about it?”
“Yes.”
“Let’s talk about this someplace comfortable.” Ry scooped her up into his arms and carried her to the bed.
Within a minute, she was nestled between the two men. Warmth surrounded her, making her feel protected and safe. This is what her life had been missing. Coming home had given her back the feelings of being safe and secure, feelings she’d been missing in New York. Her heart jerked.
“Did I scare you yesterday?” Jed asked before Katie could fully follow her own train of thought.
“Oh, no, Jed.” She turned her head and kissed his rigid jawline. “You didn’t scare me.” She’d hurt Jed, and that made her angry with herself. “I’m sorry I hurt you,” she whispered.
“Oh, Kitty Kat.” Jed squeezed her shoulders. “I wasn’t hurt but worried about you and why you had such a fierce reaction.”
“Why did you safeword, sweetheart?” Ry asked. “Jed told me everything, so help us understand.”
“I don’t even understand why I freaked out so much.”
Ry brushed her hair away from her face. “Tell us what happened.”
Katie outlined Jed taking her into the stall, tying her up, and how excited and scared she had been. How she’d been on edge for days and couldn’t wait to see what Jed had in store for her. She squirmed between the two men. She was getting wet just from remembering the heated play session.
“So I played with your body.” Jed laid his palm on her right breast while Ry did the same to her left.
“Yes.” Oh, Lord, her breasts swelled beneath their warm palms, making her blood sing.
“And you climaxed,” Jed said, teasing her nipple to attention.
“Yes.” She fought not to arch into their touch. It was so distracting, but damn, it felt so good. So right.
“Then I turned away to get a vibrator and you screamed out your safeword.”
“No...” She frowned. “Mike called your name.” Fear went straight through her veins. Panic and dread filled her veins, and she tried to fight it down. She was safe here. There was no reason to panic.
“What are you thinking right now?” Ry dropped his hand from her and cupped her chin.
“I did say my safeword.” She watched the scene play in her head like a movie. “Jed had stuck his finger in my mouth, so I could taste myself.”
“Did that repulse you?” Jed asked.
She shook her head. “It didn’t bother me, but you turned away and...” Mike’s voice filtered through her mind. Her stomach started churning, her breathing became rapid and a wave of dizziness swept over her. “Oh, shit.” She closed her eyes, fighting down the invading panic.
“Katie, talk to us,” Ry demanded in a hard voice.
“You aren’t going to like it,” she whispered.
“Ry didn’t ask you if we’d like it. Tell us. Now.” Jed’s voice was like steel cutting through the fog in her brain.
She registered the command. She took a breath and let it out slowly. They needed to know.
“I was afraid Mike would come back, see me spread out naked, you playing with me.”
Jed’s fingers grasped hers. “I promised you. No one would see you.”
“You actually said no one would barge in. You never said anything about anyone strolling in or you letting them into the barn.”
Jed let out a groan. “Katie, I would protect you. You have to know that.”
“Yes...no...” Hadn’t she’d come to that same conclusion? She went over the events in her mind once again. “Oh, hell.”
“Explain, please?” Ry’s voice grew quiet.
Katie lifted her gaze to meet his. “Fear. Deep bone chilling fear hit me.” She reached up with her free hand and touched his firm cheek.
“Then what happened?” Jed asked, his hand rubbing soothing circles on her stomach as Ry stroked her collar bone. Their touch made it easier for her to concentrate on her thoughts and chased her fears away.
“I don’t know. My mind kind of went blank. All I could think about was Mike walking back there, seeing me, and asking if he could play with us.” She shivered, and two male arms tightened around her—one on her shoulders, the other on her waist.
“Never.” Jed spit the word out. “I would never do that without your consent or without preparing you for it.”
“Jed’s right. We would never hurt you like that.”
“I know.” She let her gaze drop. “Fear isn’t always rational.”
“No, it’s not, Katie.” Ry gripped her chin tilting her head back until both men could gaze into her eyes.
“What made you call out ‘red’?” Jed asked.
“I was so scared.”
“We get that, sweetheart. But there has to be more.”
Katie bit her lip. What else happened? Nothing, just Mike’s voice, she thought it was coming closer, then wham, full blown panic. “I don’t know. I just panicked.”
“Looks like we’ve hit another hidden trigger,” Ry said.
“Trigger?”
“Let me explain,” Jed said. “The blindfold reminded you of something when you were little. But you didn’t remember it until we blindfolded you. We call that a hidden trigger.”
“And you think that’s what happened?” She looked at Ry.
“That’s all I can think of.” He brushed a kiss against her temple.
“How do we avoid them?” She didn’t want to panic on them again. Once was bad enough, but twice was bugging her.
“I’m not sure if we can,” Jed said.
Katie frowned. “I don’t like you two getting angry with me.” And she didn’t. Jed had been very upset this afternoon.
“Kitty Kat.” Jed’s breath brushed her cheek. “I was never angry with you. I was upset with the situation and frustrated, because you wouldn’t let me help you. I wanted to comfort and hold you.”
“And I denied you that.” Oh damn. She was doing this all wrong. “I knew I was going to mess this up.”
Both men froze at her words.
“Katie,” Ry started.
“Honey, you didn’t mess anything up,” Jed said.
“But I panicked. I ran from you.” She cupped Jed’s cheek with her hand, relishing the warmth of his skin against hers.
“It happened.” He shrugged his shoulders. “I’m over it.”
“But,” Ry said. “We need you to try not to panic and instead, talk to us.”
She nodded.
“And maybe it happened because it was the first time we’d played outside the house,” Jed said.
“Or possibly you were overwhelmed and couldn’t process what was happening,” Ry said.
Katie shook her head. “I was excited for more until I heard Mike’s voice, and then I panicked at the idea of him seeing me like that.” She bit her lower lip.
“I’m sorry you felt that way,” Jed said. “I had no idea Mike was going to be bringing back the trailer yesterday.”
“I realized that, now. But...” She closed her eyes then opened them. “If Mike hadn’t shown up, I would have begged for more. It’s hard for me to voice this, but I wanted more. I wanted to be bound and teased.”
“Oh, Kitty Kat,” Jed said. “There’s no reason to be afraid to tell us what you want.”
“Never be afraid,” Ry said. “We want you to be comfortable with us and our relationship. Don’t ever be scared to voice your desires and opinions to us.”
Katie took a deep breath and let it out. “Okay. I’m sorry about yesterday.”
Jed held up his hand. “Don’t apologize.” Jed started tracing his fingers over her stomach again.
“If something scares you, makes you want to run screaming, or whatever, tell us, Katie. We can work it out together, just like this.” Ry’s lips slid over her cheek before finding her lips. His kiss was soft, sweet and gentle. Her blood heated.
When he lifted his head, Katie was boneless. Damn, she loved being with these tw
o men. They made her feel like a woman, a desirable woman.
“So now what?” she asked.
“Just relax.” Jed slipped his arm around her waist.
His touch sent awareness shooting through her veins.
“Tonight, we’re just going to lay here.” Ry shifted so she was half lying on his chest.
“I like this idea.” And she did; it made her feel closer to them.
****
Katie pulled her car into the garage behind Ry and Jed’s house. She climbed out of her vehicle and sauntered up the walkway in the early evening sunshine.
In the last fourteen days, she’d had dinner with Ry and Jed every night, and many times lunch with one or the other. In that time, she’d learned she could talk to them about everything and anything.
They’d gone out to several restaurants in Felton’s Creek for dinner, a couple of times she met either Jed or Ry for lunch, and even one day they had an afternoon break at Gran’s tea shop.
It was these times Katie didn’t take for granted. She learned a lot from the way Ry and Jed interacted with other people in town and how everyone treated them when they were out to dinner together. They were treated like family. Everyone talked to them, smiled, and there were even a few winks.
Not that there weren’t bumps in the road. There had been some hard stares and even some who shook their heads at the three of them. But Katie chose to ignore them. What they did in their private life was just that—private. They didn’t flaunt their lifestyle, and it was no one’s business.
After unlocking the front door, she pushed it open, surprised to find both Ry and Jed waiting for her.
“Hey, guys.” She strolled over to Ry, brushed a soft kiss against his lips before doing the same with Jed.
“Missed you today.” Ry caressed her cheek.
“Me, too.” Jed took her hand. “And we have a surprise tonight.”
“Oh?”
“Yep.” Jed led her down to the dungeon with Ry following.
Her stomach quivered with excitement. They hadn’t had any extended play sessions in the last two weeks since Ry had been stuck working weekends. Not that they hadn’t played at all, but those sessions had been short. Now Ry had the weekend off and it was Saturday evening. They had lots of time.