by Kate Baxter
Gods-damn it. There was no way for her to win. It didn’t matter what she did or didn’t say. Ewan wanted her to know the rules changed when and where he saw fit. She’d surrendered power and it was up to Ewan whether or not she’d get an ounce of satisfaction here tonight. Her thirst raged as the need for blood nearly surpassed her need for physical satiation. Manipulation obviously didn’t work with Ewan. Neither did sweet talk. She had no choice but to be honest with him.
“I want you hard and deep and I shouldn’t have to beg for it.” She thrust her hips in an effort to show him exactly how she wanted him inside of her. “I want my fangs buried in your throat because my thirst is out of control and as my mate, it’s your fucking obligation to see me fed. I want to come with your blood on my tongue because it’s a pleasure that has no equal. Is that straightforward enough for you?”
Ewan’s gaze darkened and a crease dug into his forehead where his brows drew together over his eyes. Butterflies took flight in Sasha’s stomach, half excitement, half fear. A low growl gathered and vibrated in his chest and she sensed they were at some sort of turning point. Gods, if he stopped now and walked away from her, it would gut her.
Not because she held any measure of affection for him. But because she didn’t know if she could go another second without feeling some sense of completion whether it was from sex or feeding. She didn’t care at this point. The stagnation was driving her out of her mind.
He thrust hard and deep. Sasha cried out as sensation flooded her. His hand abandoned her breast to cup the back of her neck as he fucked her with wild abandon. Sasha’s cries became sobs of pleasure as he brought her close to the edge.
“Don’t stop!” Gods, if he quit now, she swore she’d burst into tears of frustration. “Gods, Ewan, don’t stop.”
His mouth came to rest at her ear. He took the lobe between his teeth and bit down before growling, “Bite me when you come, and not a second sooner.”
For once, she’d do exactly as he told her to.
Ewan’s breath sawed in and out of his chest as he fucked her. A groan accompanied each deep thrust that wound Sasha even tighter. Her hips bucked and her back arched as her body seemed to twist and coil in on itself. She sucked in a sharp breath and exhaled as the orgasm exploded through her with an intensity that caused her limbs to quake and chills to break out over her skin. The pleasure ebbed only to crest again and Sasha buried her face against Ewan’s throat. She bit down and as his blood flowed over her tongue, the wave crested once again, as overpowering and intense as it had been when the orgasm started.
Ewan’s fingers curled around the nape of her neck as he held her head tight against his throat. She took long pulls from his vein as she was swept up in the euphoric bliss. Ewan let out a low groan as his hips bucked wildly. His muscles went rigid as he settled against her. The base of his cock pulsed against her pussy and Sasha was flooded with heat as he came. He collapsed against her and Sasha’s tongue flicked out to close the punctures at his throat.
“Don’t ever visit this place again, Sasha.” The words left Ewan’s lips between pants of breath that tickled Sasha’s ear. “Do you understand me?”
She didn’t know what to make of his possessive tone but for the second time tonight, she had no problem doing as he asked. “I won’t.”
“Keep your word. I don’t take broken promises lightly.”
Sasha was in way over her head with the berserker, and thanks to their tether, there was no getting out.
CHAPTER
13
The days bled into weeks.
Sasha’s tongue made lazy passes over the punctures in Ewan’s inner thigh. He rolled to his side and she used his leg as a pillow. He reached down to caress the silky length of her dark hair, letting the strands slip through his fingers. Ewan’s nights had become an endless haze of fighting and fucking and he no longer cared about the rumors that spread about him. Apparently, Ewan had created quite a stir in the supernatural underground. The berserker warlord, arena fighter, skilled killer, who’d taken a vampire as his lover. Fortunes were made and lost on his fights and afterward, he’d spend the hours till sunrise being pleasured by Sasha, pleasuring Sasha, and seeing to every single one of her needs.
His appetite for her was insatiable. As was hers for him.
He no longer had an aversion to her taking his vein. On the contrary, its erotic effects seemed to intensify with every feeding and Ewan welcomed her bite. Gregor would have his balls if he found out, but what the berserker king didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him. Drew, on the other hand, had formed some very unsavory opinions about who Ewan chose to keep company with lately. He’d quit voicing those opinions once Ewan told his cousin to keep his fucking mouth shut or he’d nix his cut of the arena winnings.
What Ewan did with Sasha was no one’s fucking business. And he planned to keep it that way.
“I can’t believe you’re not passed out right now.” Sasha gave a lazy laugh and the husky tenor rippled over Ewan’s skin. “You have to be exhausted.”
Berserkers were bred to be nearly inexhaustible. Coupled with his superior healing ability and strength, he was surprised the battle master still allowed him to fight in the arena. The odds were always in his favor. Hardly fair.
“I can go all night, love.” Ewan brushed the hair away from her temple. “And all day. Give me the opportunity to prove it to you.”
Her heartbeat kicked up in her chest and Ewan smiled. Gods, he loved her responsiveness, the way the simplest words affected her. She rolled onto her stomach so she could look up at him. Her coy smile revealed the dainty tips of her fangs and Ewan’s gut clenched at the memory of those fangs piercing the flesh of his inner thigh only moments ago. Her passion was unparalleled, her appetites, insatiable. Every night presented a new challenge and Ewan couldn’t wait to rise up to it.
Gods, she was beautiful.
Sasha’s finger traced a pattern from his thigh, up and over his hip. “Lucky for you, I’m out of commission at sunrise. Otherwise, I’d put you to the test.”
Her finger roamed from his hip to the trail of crisp hair that ran from his belly button to his cock. She reached the base and traced the length of his shaft, stirring the needy bastard to attention in an instant. Her lips quirked in a seductive half smile and silver flashed in her hungry gaze. They’d been at it for hours and she was ready for more. Talk about inexhaustible stamina …
“Keep touching me like that and if I have to, I’ll yank the sun right out of the sky for a few more hours with you.”
Her gaze went liquid and her lips parted on a breath. So responsive.
She’d rented a one-bedroom apartment on the outskirts of the city and they’d spent all of their nights here since the night he’d found her at the sex club. They might have been fucking every chance they got, but Sasha hadn’t let her guard down enough to allow Ewan access to her coven. Gregor wasn’t a bit worried about the situation or concerned about the pace at which their supposed relationship was developing. With every hour spent together, Ewan gained another little piece of Sasha’s trust. He was the perfect double agent, poised to take the vampires down from the inside. Ewan looked away as a momentary twinge of guilt tugged at his chest. He used Sasha’s own nature against her, a mate bond he knew nothing about and couldn’t feel. Would she be surprised by his betrayal? He was reminded of the story about the frog that trusted the crocodile and accepted a ride on his back, only to be shocked that the croc had planned to eat him all along.
She knew what he was. It wasn’t his fault if she didn’t do anything to protect herself.
“You have to be starving. You haven’t eaten all night.”
Ewan grinned. “I’m starving all right. But it isn’t for food.”
Sasha’s gaze slid to the side. It amused him that she could still act shy and embarrassed considering the long list of incredibly dirty things they’d done over the past several weeks. There wasn’t an inch of her body that he didn’t know. Hadn’t explored. He�
��d fucked, licked, sucked and then some. He couldn’t help but think about the hours they’d just spent in this bed. How he’d turned her into a wet, shuddering mass of flesh and want and need. How she’d begged, moaned, and writhed while he feasted on her pussy, allowing his finger to wander down the crease of her ass and into that sensitive region that had driven her to scream when she’d finally come for him.
“I’m being serious.” Her words pulled him from his sensual reverie. She looked at him from beneath lowered lashes and gods, did that coy expression ever turn him on. “You need to eat. What do you want? I can order a pizza or we can get Chinese.”
Her concern for him sent a warm rush through his limbs. Berserkers were hard, compassionless creatures who cared little for the well-being of others. As long as you could fight, you were good to go. It hadn’t always been that way. But it had been so long since they’d known empathy, Ewan could scarcely remember what it felt like. By small degrees, Sasha reawakened those lost feelings in him and it worried him far more than it probably should have.
“I’ll eat when I get home.” The word soured in Ewan’s mouth.
“Home” was a run-down shithole that wasn’t fit for an animal to live in. And breakfast would consist of whatever scraps from the previous night he could scrounge up. There were times when Ewan wondered if what Gregor’s hatred of the vampires really stemmed from was their seemingly endless wealth and extravagant lifestyles. Historically, they were the aristocrats of the supernatural world. Their covens amassed wealth and only their outcasts didn’t benefit from their affluence. Ewan’s life had always been hard. Cold. Hungry. Wanting. Even before the wars and the slaughters, he’d known hardship.
Berserkers had always been considered outliers. Shunned and feared. Perhaps that stigma was what fed Gregor’s need for vengeance. Ewan sighed. Did it matter one way or the other? It wouldn’t change his lot in life or the current situation.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you eat…” Ewan shifted onto his back and Sasha crawled up the length of his body and settled herself on top of his chest. “Do berserkers have some sort of weird food hang-ups?”
He chuckled at her teasing tone. “I don’t have the luxury of being able to snack during sex like you do. I doubt you’d be so forgiving if I reached over for a slice of pizza while you were straddling me.”
Sasha swatted at his chest. Her laughter rang out around him, music to his ears. “If you don’t like it, I could always ask someone else…”
Ewan reached out and snatched her wrist in his hand. He didn’t mind her teasing him, but there were some things he wouldn’t joke about. “If you ever so much as think about allowing another to feed you, whoever it is will meet a swift end.”
The thought of Sasha’s lush mouth on another’s body caused a violent surge of jealousy that rivaled battle rage in its force and power. Ewan wasn’t used to feeling possessive of anyone or anything. The foreign emotions nearly choked the air from his lungs.
“You don’t have to worry about that.” Sasha’s voice went low and soft. “After tasting your blood, there’s no way I could stomach anyone else’s.”
The heat in her gaze seared him. It filled him with a perverse sense of pride that he had something no one else could provide her. That she depended on him for her very survival. No one had ever depended on Ewan for anything that wasn’t derived from violence. He wasn’t sure he was equipped to properly care for her.
You’re not. And besides, that’s not what you’re here for. Ewan needed to remind himself that caring for Sasha wasn’t his reason for being here with her. The moment he let their time together become something it wasn’t, was the moment he’d secure both of their deaths.
Gregor didn’t tolerate insubordination or betrayal. Those who crossed him met violent and painful ends.
“I’m glad I have something you need.” Sasha was a means to an end. Nothing more.
“Oh, you do.” Her eyes sparked with mischief. “No doubt about it.”
Attachment wasn’t an option. Because their blissful nights of passion would come to an end all too soon.
* * *
Sasha had never felt as free as she had these past several weeks. Having her own space away from the coven and the autonomy to be with Ewan—however she wanted—made her feel as though an invisible weight had been lifted from her shoulders. She answered to no one. Had shucked all of her responsibilities. Of course, she knew it couldn’t last forever, this vacation from her life. She couldn’t avoid Diego or Saeed for much longer. Ewan would no longer be her secret once she was forced to come clean. And when that happened, the peaceful bliss she’d found with him would disappear.
She wasn’t ready for that to happen yet.
“What about you? Is blood the only thing you need or could you go for a slice of pizza every once in a while?”
Sasha rested her chin on Ewan’s chest. Over the past several weeks, they’d gone from quick encounters where they sated their physical needs and parted ways, to post-sex conversations, to entire nights spent together. She’d tried to convince herself that she needed nothing more than her soul to be returned without any sort of relationship to go along with the tether. She’d thought she could keep it impersonal. But with every passing day, she came to realize impersonal might not be possible. Ewan fascinated her and that was a huge problem.
“Pizza’s okay, but I’d kill for a bowl of mac-and-cheese.”
“So you can eat?”
The intensity with which he watched her coaxed chills to Sasha’s skin. “I can.” Sasha paused. She worried her lip between her teeth and the point of her fang nicked the skin. Her tongue flicked out to lick the blood away and Ewan’s gaze focused on her mouth. She wanted to open up to him, to foster some sort of intimacy between them. But doing so could be disastrous. He was a mortal enemy to vampire kind and by simply being with him, Sasha was a traitor. “I need blood to keep my organs functioning, though. Without blood, my heart won’t beat, my lungs won’t expand or contract. My stomach can’t digest food.”
Ewan’s brow furrowed. “So blood is like a supplement?”
Sasha laughed. “I guess you could say that. Dhampirs need blood but much less frequently than vampires do. I’m not a biologist, but I’m guessing our bodies don’t produce something we need and the drinking of blood takes care of that.”
“I’ve always wondered.”
Had she said too much? It’s not like whether or not they could eat actual food was some deep, dark secret. It didn’t reveal some hidden weakness the berserkers could exploit. Still, she couldn’t help but feel as though she’d done something wrong. Gods, why couldn’t she have been tethered by a shifter or werewolf? She would have gladly settled for a warlock or even a fae. Hell, she would have considered herself blessed to have been tethered by a dhampir. Instead, Sasha found herself inexorably bound to someone whose entire existence revolved around wanting her kind dead.
“I like ice cream, too. And chocolate.”
Ewan’s lips quirked in a half smile. Sasha’s stomach did a backflip and she tried not to stare. His expression rarely broke a scowl, but when it did, it took her breath away. “So you have a sweet tooth?”
“You could say that.”
His grin faded and his lips thinned as he studied her. “What does my blood taste like?”
Sasha swallowed. His absence of humor reminded her why it was a good idea to remain wary of him despite their tether. “It’s unlike anything I’ve ever tasted.” Sasha averted her gaze. Somehow the admission made her feel vulnerable. “Heady. Sweet. Like warm honey. The scent of your blood calls to me. I crave it.”
A shadow passed over his gaze. “All blood does this to you?”
“All blood is palatable,” Sasha replied. “But yours is the sweetest. The most fragrant.”
The storm clouds passed and his eyes once against shone bright golden brown. “I see.”
Sasha’s lips puckered. She couldn’t tell if he was happy with her response or not. On
e of the things she enjoyed about being with Ewan was his unpredictability. It kept her on her toes and added a layer of danger to their relationship. If you could call whatever this was between them a relationship.
Fatigue pulled at Sasha’s eyelids and she stifled a yawn. Sunrise wasn’t far off and she needed to get back to the house before she succumbed to daytime sleep and was forced to stay in the apartment—where she was more vulnerable—until sunset. She never slept here. Not when Ewan—and possibly every berserker in the city—knew where she was. Sasha wasn’t stupid. She knew how to protect herself. She might have craved Ewan like a drug, but she also knew the dangers of addiction.
“I should go.”
She pushed away from Ewan’s chest and instantly missed the warmth of his body against hers. As usual, he didn’t move to stop her. Didn’t ask her to stay a little longer. Sasha didn’t want to admit it hurt a little. Deep down, some part of her wanted him to want her. To crave and need her like she did him. She hated that there was a part of her that was dependent on him. That the tether could only be felt by her.
She didn’t want to want Ewan. But she was coming to realize there was nothing she could do to stop it.
He folded his arms behind his head and he watched in silence as she dressed. She used to find his undivided attention a little unnerving but she’d quickly grown to enjoy having his eyes on her. From the corner of her eye she took note of the hills and valleys of muscle that constructed his torso, the sheer strength of him that she knew so intimately. Her attention wandered to the unkempt mass of light auburn curls that fell across his forehead and the shadow of a beard that covered the sharp angles of his jaw. The supernatural world feared Ewan, but Sasha desired him with an intensity that left her shaken.
She finished dressing and grabbed her bag. Without a word she turned to leave.
“Tomorrow night?”
She paused at the doorway. Her stomach twirled as a pleasant rush of heat suffused her. “I’ll be here.” She didn’t bother to look back as she left the bedroom and headed for the door.