"Yes, I am. Hilda is in the hospital. They took her in this morning."
"She'll be fine," Addi said confidently.
"I know. God is in control." Her mother sighed and then looked over at her. "These last couple of days you feel different."
"Different how?" Addi asked trying not to act surprised that her mother had noticed that she was not the same.
She hadn't given her mother enough credit for being observant.
"I don't know," her mother said vaguely, "maybe I am just being fanciful. You feel older, more mature. Maybe it's the way you are wearing your hair now or maybe it's your speech. My little girl is growing up."
She got up and gave Addi a brief hug. "Don't grow up too fast though. I like all of your stages."
She squeezed Addi's hand and then exited the kitchen.
Her Dad and Uncle Stan came in through the back door shortly after that. Both of them dressed in hard hats and coveralls.
"Hey Addi." Uncle Stan greeted her. "I hope you don't mind if we have a private meeting in here now. Too many ears outside."
Addi nodded and looked through the window. There were a few men milling about. It was pay day. Her father and uncle were whispering and pointing at a paper.
She smiled to herself. The two of them had always been close—best friends to the end. She winced at the thought. Uncle Stan's end was very close.
She stiffened when a new figure joined the others in front of the office. It was Rusty! She knew it was him.
He was tall light skinned and had curly hair. The goatee was just a starter, not the full one she remembered when he was hauled away by the police. He was wearing old cement splattered jeans and a white merino vest which showed off his slim but muscular arms.
She couldn't see where Sky found the appeal or that he looked like Tevin Campbell. Maybe if you squinted really hard you could see a little resemblance to Damian Junior Gong Marley, without the locks.
But Sky found some unseen appeal that lasted decades, even though Rusty had killed her dad and despite the fact that Rusty had been in jail.
He was twenty-two now. He wouldn't be elligible for parole until he was forty-six and even then Sky had kept in touch with him.
Addi glanced at the pot to make sure that the rice was not in any danger of being burnt and then went back to the window. Her uncle and father were whispering about figures and were quietly arguing about a particular worker because he was on the site for just an hour.
She zoned out of their conversation and focused on Rusty. In exactly thirty-four days he would kill her uncle presumably because of a pay dispute. She had some time to stop that and she needed Sky's help. Maybe Sky had written something in that book marked for Sky Porter Eyes Only.
Addi sighed. So many things to do this summer. She had no idea fixing things would be so hard.
She gritted her teeth in frustration. It wasn't going to be easy manipulating lives or convincing people not to do certain things. And if she were not successful she would be reliving her same old life again.
"That's a big sigh young lady." Uncle Stan looked up from the paper he was holding and grinned at her. "You okay?"
"Fine. Pondering the vagaries of life." She shrugged and turned away.
Her father and uncle looked at each other.
"Vagaries," her father mouthed to her uncle. "Where's the dictionary?"
She didn't see when the two men chuckled and headed to the back door.
****
They had dinner. Compliments abounded for her sweet and sour chicken dish. She found it ironic because everyone at the table had the same dish through the years in her past life and said nearly the same things.
Her mother was beaming proudly at her. Josh was going at his plate like he had not eaten since the morning.
Her father's comment had Randy looking sharply at her.
"This seems like a dish that you have perfected, Addi. It's just right. I can't believe that this is your first go at it."
Addi looked at Randy and winked just when the clock made the hour sound. A small low gong.
And then the sound of a car as it drove up into the yard and stopped.
"I wonder who is that?" Her mother had her fork mid way to her mouth.
Addi looked at Randy and winked.
The time of reckoning was at hand.
****
Her Uncle Victor was her mother's twin brother. They didn't look very much alike. Victor was shorter, had a broad face, and a dimple in his chin. He was more on the chubby side because he loved his food and made no apologies for it. He was even bigger in the future and quite healthy too.
He was currently married to Laura who loved to cook. She had always thought of them as very happy with each other. Except that in the future they were both married to other people. Addi couldn't quite remember what had broken them up or when they had even split.
Addi had not seen Laura for years until Nicky's wedding a few months before her journey back to Jamaica to spread Sky's ashes. Laura had a hip problem and had to be assisted to the front of the church to see her granddaughter get married.
Seeing her look so sprightly and young was almost a shocker. Time had indeed been unkind to Laura.
Right now, both of them looked worried sick. Hilda was their youngest at nineteen. They had forced her into one of those shotgun marriages when she got pregnant to save face in the neighborhood where they lived.
Byron, Hilda's husband was eighteen but he was from a wealthy respectable family, which had lost most of their money in the local financial meltdown that started in 93. Byron's father had killed himself after his furniture company had gone belly up in 96. Hilda had left him that year, moving back home with her parents and taking the children, Nicky and William, because Byron had gotten violent.
She looked at her uncle and Laura now and almost had to stuff her fingers in her mouth not to blurt out their futures. They wouldn't believe her and they had too much on their plates right now to receive that kind of bad news at this moment.
She bit her tongue and worried her lip. She knew too much. Being a resetter was a burden.
As expected her uncle sighed, sat down in the settee and looked at them all his eyes wet.
"Hilda is in a coma. They are saying she might not make it."
"We should pray." Laura moaned. She was not handling the news well at all. Her mother who had answered the door and left them at the table urged them up.
"Come on. You heard the man. Prayers can move mountains. The Bible says that if you have faith as small as a mustard seed...come on people."
Addi looked at Randy, he had pushed away his plate and was avoiding eye contact with her. She couldn't even crow, I told you so.
Randy had gone reflective. She wondered what on earth he was thinking. His face was like a fortress, closed to her.
They had prayer. Her mother had prayed a fervent heart felt prayer. Her uncle and aunt stayed until late, finishing off her sweet and sour chicken, even eating the leftovers from their plates.
Tragedy seemed to open Uncle Victor's appetite.
Randy had disappeared to his room so she went to hers but she couldn't sleep. Even when she heard the hall clock give the top of the hour sound again.
She glanced at her small clock on the dresser. It was saying one o'clock. She got up and headed to the living room.
The house was silent. She heard a dog bark in the distance. She snuggled into the settee and watched as the lights from Uncle Stan's house made patterns on the veranda walls as it intersected the tree nearby. She didn't know how long she stared at the patterns. Willing herself to sleep.
She heard when Randy's door opened and when he headed for the kitchen. He turned on the kitchen light and then she heard him enter the fridge and then a cup was washed.
He couldn't sleep either.
That was good to know.
He was exiting the kitchen when he saw her in the settee he came over silently. He was wearing socks and his familiar heather gra
y tracksuit.
"Hi Witch." His voice was quiet in the room.
"Hi." She cleared her throat.
"So we are having one of our midnight chats again." He settled in the settee across from her and sighed audibly.
"Seems so," She said flippantly. "Do you believe me now?"
Randy took his time to answer. "If I say yes, I am crazy and if I say no I am in denial." he shrugged. "I believe that you know stuff. Stuff you shouldn't know. How you know them is so crazy. It's so way out there. It's..." he inhaled, "what do you want me to help you with?"
Addi sat up in the settee a blast of hope hit her in the chest, and squeezed. He believed her.
Randy believed her. She fought the urge to go over to him and hug him. It wouldn't be appropriate now. It might never be that way between them again. She was going to reset Randy out of her life.
She would find somebody else.
For now she would stamp down her feelings for him. Bury them. They couldn't see the light of day because she forbid it.
Randy was just her brother's friend and she was going to have nothing to do with him this time around. He was going to be free to choose his future and she was never going to interfere.
"Hey, you zoning out on me." He clipped his fingers.
"No. Er sorry." She cleared her throat. "I was just thinking about something. I need help to find out who Ellie is seeing beside Josh. We need to let him know what kind of person she was before he gets involved."
Randy grunted, "or we could just tell him to wear a rubber when he sleeps with her."
"Condoms can break," Addi hissed. "I am talking about total prevention here. No sex with Ellie. Kill it before she starts it."
"Are you sure that you have the correct version of events?" Randy whispered. "Suppose Josh started their sexual relationship? Maybe Ellie is not the sexual aggressor you seem to be describing. Your brother is no saint, Addi.
"Besides, have you thought this through? How are we going to even track who Ellie sleeps with? How are we to track her?"
"We could spend time with them," Addi whispered back." I could invite myself along to all of their alone time. You could distract Josh for me, so he doesn't spend time with her."
Randy chuckled. "It won't work. Josh picks her up from school in the evenings. Before he drops her home he takes her out for ice cream or something. I don't know where he goes with her, he doesn't tell me. He is an adult male with the hots for this girl. No amount of intervention is going to keep him away from her."
"This whole thing is harder than I thought," Addi muttered. "Can we at least find a whole day when we can track her, see who she interacts with, like a detective kind of thing?"
Randy shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe. Your father and uncle are going to a work site in Negril for a couple of days next week."
"I remember that." Addi clipped her fingers. "They left for a whole week. It rained every single day they were away. I spent most of that time reading."
Randy nodded. "Well then, I am responsible for liaising with the guy they have on the site in Ingleside until they get back. I am to check in everyday, three times per day. I could take you with me, if your mom says yes. We could check up on Ellie for a couple of days at various times. That's the best I can do."
"But it's brilliant!" Addi was almost salivating at the thought.
"Goodnight Addi." Randy got up.
"Wait!" Addi said suddenly feeling bereft. She thought he would have a million questions for her about the future instead he seemed almost resigned.
"What is it?" Randy asked.
"So don't you want to know more about...everything?" Addi asked the question almost desperately. She didn't want the only person who believed her to leave. She had loads of interesting information to tell him.
"No, not really." Randy shook his head. "Not now. Now I need to sleep and you should too. Even forty year old teenagers need their sleep."
He gave her a little salute and left.
But Addi couldn't settle down. Her brain was ticking over time thinking about her previous life with Randy.
Randy, Randy, Randy...
She eventually rolled over on her back and stared up at the ceiling. Her first encounter with him was this summer and then she had seen him at Josh's hasty wedding in December. He had been best man at the wedding. She hadn't been able to keep her eyes off of him. It had been her first sighting of him since summer and that December had just cemented in her mind after seeing him again that her summer crush had grown and hardened into something else.
She had made a stupid vow that she was only going to love Randall Vassell forever. There would be no one else for her.
It wasn't hard to keep her vow. Maybe if Randy was not around so much in her sixteenth and seventeenth year. Maybe if he hadn't been so handsome and attentive and kind to her.
Whenever he came to spend weekends, which was quite frequently since Josh had to return home often, Randy would return here and he would spend the weekend with her parents because Josh didn't have the room at his new apartment.
Randy had always remembered to get her a gift. He had always remembered her birthdays and her exams and all sorts of things that not even her own family was as aware of. She had taken accounts in high school because he was good at it and business was his area. It had also given her an excuse to call him everyday to help her with her homework.
He had always found the time to help her. Sometimes breaking dates with girls his age, girls she was rabidly jealous of. He never wanted to discuss them with her, always deflecting her questions, always trying to act as if his only interest in her was as his best friend's sister.
She always sensed it was more than that and she waited, just as she was sure he was waiting, for her to grow up, become mature, be old enough to know what her feelings were. He never said it, she just assumed.
Years later he confirmed that her assumptions were right. He told her he had liked her almost immediately but suppressed it.
And then came 1995. Her eighteenth year. Randy's final year of university. The year she migrated from Jamaica with her parents. The year he met Kenya and her good father the Reverend P.N St. Claire entered the scene.
The year when she thought her life would fall apart.
Randy switched from business and went into ministry and then by 1997 they were married.
She was trying to work out, which one was worse, 95 or 97.
She had spent most of 1997 and the days leading up to Randy's marriage in a miserable bubble. And nothing or no one could console her.
Addi closed her eyes tiredly.
This time around what would she like to have happen?
Change it all.
Forget about loving Randy.
Forget that you love him.
Forget that you love him.
Forget that you love him.
You'll be happier.
Would she really be? The question pounded in her mind until she drifted off to sleep.
Chapter Twelve
"What's wrong with your bed?" Her mother was standing over her, a cup of tea in her hands. She was in a shiny satiny taupe colored robe.
"It squeaks and is lumpy," Addi muttered, closing her eyes again. It's a good thing my young back can deal with the torture. If I were your age, it would kill me. I'd wake up limping and maybe black and blue."
"Mmmph," Vicky muttered and then moved away, she heard rustling as she took her seat across from Addi. "We have had that bed for ages. Since Josh was born."
"No wonder," Addi muttered. Surprisingly, it hadn't bothered her the first time around because she hadn't known any better.
"I'll talk to Nate. We'll buy a new one by the end of the week. Something firmer."
Addi opened her eyes. "Thanks mom."
Vicky nodded and cupped the tea cup in her hand. She looked thoughtful like she had a million and one things on her mind. The frown lines in her forehead got deeper the more she thought.
She finally focused on Addi.
"Your father and uncle are leaving for a couple of days next week. They need to finish up a project in Negril."
Addi nodded.
"I wanted to go to Kingston to visit a friend of mine who is in Jamaica for a while…spend two days but I can't go anymore. Nate wouldn't allow it."
"Why?" Addi asked eagerly. She couldn't remember this happening either. And what was even more surprising her father was not allowing it. She sat up straighter in the settee and wiped the sleep from her eyes
"I shouldn't go anyway not even with Nate," Vicky muttered. "Noel was my boyfriend before your dad. He is here for his mother's funeral."
Addi widened her eyes. She could not recall hearing about any boyfriends before her mother and father got married.
Their love story was solid. They met at university in their second year. They were each other's first, or so she had assumed. They had always been together, happy and well adjusted. In 2017 they celebrated forty-five years of marriage.
Sometimes, you should let bygones be bygones. Vicky sighed and focused on Addi. "Some things should not be revisited."
"But sometimes you can change things, be at peace, set things straight, reorder them in the way they should have been in the first place." Addi countered.
"Yes, I suppose." Vicky sighed and then got up. She was obviously tired of the conversation."You're painting today?"
"Yes." Addi stood up and stretched.
"Remember to wear a mask," Vicky said briskly, "and wear old clothes and do not mess up the furniture!"
"Yes ma'am." Addi headed for the plastic covered room and found the nattiest ugliest outfit that was in her drawer and pulled them on—acid washed jeans and a white t-shirt that was so stretched at the bottom it flared like a dress.
Her mother turned on the radio in the hall; as usual it was on RJR. The Good Morning Man show with Alan Magnus was on.
Somebody cranked up the volume. She could hear it through the door.
She had not listened to radio in years! She had a selection of inspirational and soothing music CD's in the car. She felt a real bout of nostalgia when she heard Alan Magnus' voice.
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