by Liz Turner
“Hey, George,” Karen smiled. “How’s the day?”
“The day is full of paperwork and phone calls,” George said. Looking over his shoulder at Randolf, he lowered his voice. “Between us, something’s odd about the hiker we found yesterday.”
Interested, Victoria leaned over. “How’s that?”
“Well, her fingerprints were sanded off,” George said. “As for her dental work, even though she’s so young, she has no teeth! She had a complete set of dentures instead!!”
“What!” Victoria exclaimed.
“It’s true,” George said. “There’s no way to identify her, really.”
“That’s fascinating.” Karen bent over, closer to George. “Do you have any theories?”
“This early in the case, no,” George said. “Corporal Jager likes to keep an open mind to avoid contaminating the evidence with our assumptions.”
“Well go on. You must have some theories, even if they’re only personal ones,” Amanda said.
“Well…” George hesitated, took another look at Corporal Jager, and said. “I think she’s a spy.”
“A spy!” Karen gasped. “What on earth would a spy be doing all the way out here?”
“She’s not from around here, that’s for sure,” George said. “We’re unsure what her race or nationality is. She’s dark enough to be middle-eastern, but also fair enough to be from Europe or even America. Her fingerprints were sanded off. There are no dental records and that’s highly suspicious. But there are other things too. Like the fact that she was dressed really expensively but her clothes labels have been torn off. Plus, in her pockets, we found a cigarette stub of a Norwegian brand of cigarettes. So she might just be European!”
“Does no one have any idea who she is?” Amanda said.
“Not a clue,” George said. “A lot of people saw her at the party yesterday, but LeeLee Brunt says she’s never seen the woman before in her life.”
“So it could be one of the guests’ wives or girlfriend,” Karen said.
“Could be,” George said. “Or it could be that she’s a spy.”
“You get an A+ on imagination and an F on discretion, George.” Corporal Jager said, making everyone jump. “If you’re going to tattle, at least, be less obvious about it.” He said.
“Oh don’t be a spoilsport, Randolf,” Karen said. “Tell us all about it. You know it isn’t one of us who did it.”
“Do I?” Randolf asked, looking at every one of them in turn.
“Well! I’ll be,” Karen was cut off when Victoria said, “Isn’t there anything you could tell us?”
“Only that I’m not allowed to divulge information until it has been processed through official channels,” Randolf said. “Come on, Victoria, you know better than to ask.”
“What happens to the body?” Victoria asked. “If you conclude forensics and no one knows who she is?”
“She gets buried in a pauper’s grave,” Randolf said, with a shrug.
“I found her,” Victoria said. “If, after forensics, she has to be buried, I’d like to pay for a decent burial.”
Karen looked at her like she’d gone mad. “Victoria, why are you doing this?”
“I found her.” Victoria said, “And I found her too late. I feel responsible for what happened to her, in a way.”
Randolf smiled. “Unless you were the one who pushed her, Victoria, you are not responsible in any way.”
Chapter 6
With thoughts of the murdered woman still floating in her head, Victoria headed over to LeeLee Brunt’s mansion later that evening. At the mansion, clean-up was still in process, but Victoria was surprised to see Corporal Jager’s car parked outside.
Inside, the Egyptian Hall that had been the highlight of the party now crawled with workers dismantling decorations. Like ants on the dead body of roadkill, they worked industriously, in perfect sync with each other. In one corner, Victoria’s own sister Karen was dismantling a glass display that they had created for the party. In another, Amanda’s Steve was dismantling a complex mosaic that he had pasted on a wall.
Pausing to greet them both, Victoria noted how stressed they seemed. “LeeLee’s in one of her moods,” Karen said to Victoria, and Steve nodded.
“When she’s like this, you can just expect to be yelled at, sooner or later.” He said. “Then she becomes all friendly and repentant and buys you things to make you forget her anger. It’s downright childish.”
“Why is she angry?” Victoria asked.
“She’s made up some story about a missing CD,” Steve said. “But really, I think she’s furious that the murder took attention away from her party. Can you believe that? She was so smug yesterday.”
“I can’t believe you missed the party.” Karen teased. “Amanda’s really done a number on you if she convinced you to stay home and babysit with her.”
Steve blushed. “Oh come on Karen.”
“When’s the happy day again?”
“A month from now, hopefully. At least, the court marriage will be done by then. After that, we’ll plan out some really fun party. I don’t want anything overly decorated so I was thinking a nice hilltop ceremony.”
“Oh don’t make me climb again.” Victoria groaned. “My legs are still sore from my last hike.”
Immediately, all three grew sober as they remembered that the last hike had involved finding the body.
Victoria bid them goodbye and moved into an adjacent room, where LeeLee and Declan sat holding each other’s hands, as Corporal Jager took notes.
“Well, it’s a travesty,” LeeLee said. “What’s the use of having security if … if just anybody can get inside?”
Corporal Jager nodded.
“I felt absolutely horrible,” LeeLee said, putting a hand to her forehead. “You cannot imagine my mental trauma, Randy.”
Victoria stifled a smile as she saw Corporal Jager look thoroughly disgusted at being called Randy.
“I’m sure it was hard on you.” He murmured, his face immediately transitioning back into its usual blank cheerfulness.
“Terrible. That man is your uncle, I know, but he deserves to go to jail for a very long time.” LeeLee said. “The kind of accusations he made. I wouldn’t be surprised if it were him who stole my CD.”
“Stole a CD?” Corporal Jager raised an eyebrow.
“We had a CD detailing the working of all the artists who contributed to creating my party,” LeeLee said. “It had interviews with local artists like Karen Armstrong and Steve Boonsbury. We were supposed to send it to Vogue and Better Homes.” She sighed. “But now, it’s vanished.”
“I’m sure there’s a backup copy, dearest,” Declan said, soothing her.
“It’s no use having a backup copy. I insist on originals!” LeeLee declared.
“Yes, well it was shot with a digital camcorder, so there’s no such thing as original, really,” Declan replied.
“That’s the problem with life today,” LeeLee said. “It’s this digital age everything’s a copy. There’s just no originality left. Look at art. Youngsters these days focus on online paintings, can you imagine? Well, what value does that have? Does it have the spirit, the life, of an original painting? Of course not! Fashion is the only thing left that’s original, don’t you think so, Corporal Jager?”
“All I know of fashion is blue jeans and a black T-shirt.” Corporal Jager said. “Hardly any originality there.”
“I see what you mean.” LeeLee looked impressed. “We’re all becoming used to creating uniform looks in fashion. There’s no embrace of the inner self anymore. It’s all so plasticized and commoditized.”
Victoria stifled a smile again. Poor Corporal Jager looked absolutely mystified.
“My question, though,” He said with a cough, “Was whether you knew this lady or not.”
“She’s a spy, isn’t she?” LeeLee asked. “Well I had three diplomats, and two senators present yesterday at my party. It has to be one of them that killed her.�
� She waved her hand dismissively. “You’ll probably find out soon enough unless someone asks you to stop investigating.”
“I think not,” Victoria said out loud.
All three turned, seeing her for the first time.
“What do you mean?” Corporal Jager asked.
“I mean, I don’t think it could be related to politics,” Victoria said. “I think it was a local who did it.”
“Oh don’t be silly dear,” LeeLee said. “It has to be a politician. Either that or she’s a tourist. No one in Larch would be involved with a woman like that.”
“A woman like what?” Corporal Jager asked her.
LeeLee blushed. “Well, she was… classy, you know? That coat of hers for example. Don’t think I didn’t notice it. Clearly European. It was clearly bespoke, probably created by some small but upcoming designer in Milan. It was a good coat. Rich.”
“It had no labels.” Corporal Jager said.
“Of course not.” LeeLee laughed. “Still, if you bring it to me, I shall know whose it was. I once saw a coat on the other side of a crowded hall and immediately knew it was the work of Gerardo Issiterma. Another time, Wilmagelda Massini herself asked me to guess the origin of a piece of velvet while I was blindfolded. I could tell her exactly which third rate Chinese factory it originated from. Oh, the look on her face! But I might be wrong about this woman’s coat, of course. You’ve probably never heard of Gerardo or Wilmagelda, of course?”
“I haven’t, no.” Corporal Jager said. “Then again, I’m no expert at fashion. It’s going to be really convenient to have someone as knowledgeable as you, madam.”
“I’ll probably help you break the case,” LeeLee said, looking proud. “Won’t I, Corporal?”
“You actually might.” Corporal Jager said. “We have no way of finding out who she is, but you might give us a very good lead.”
“Of course, I still think she’s a spy,” LeeLee said. “She has to be. An attractive woman wearing bright red lipstick? She might as well have wandered in from a movie set.”
“Did you by any chance happen to see who she came or left with?” Corporal Jager asked.
“She was mixing around the room like a socialite,” LeeLee said. “So I didn’t get to see who she left with. But I did see who she came with.” Deliberately, dramatically, she took a pause, waiting for Jager to ask her.
“Who was it?” Corporal Jager asked.
“That odious man, Hanson,” LeeLee said, looking very satisfied.
“I see.” Corporal Jager lifted his lip a little and let it fall back down. “Declan, did you see this too?”
“I didn’t,” Declan said. “When the party started, I was too busy greeting people and mixing. I didn’t notice Hanson till he decided to get drunk and start baiting me.”
“Ah yes,” Jager said. “The fight.”
“I don’t intend to press charges,” Declan said. “But...”
“Actually, he was only verbally harassing you,” Jager said. “Witnesses say you tried to attack him. If someone can sue, it’s Hanson.”
“Defending your uncle, I see,” Declan said, with a curl of his lip. “Did he pull some strings to get you stationed here?”
“Not that I’m aware of, no.” Corporal Jager kept his cool. “As a matter of fact, I think he was quite keen that I not be posted here.”
“Well it's certainly convenient how you keep rescuing him,” Declan said. “Even when Boyd was murdered you were defending Hanson all the time, right?” He looked at Victoria. “I’ve heard Victoria here gave you a piece of her mind.”
“Oh that she did.” Corporal Jager said. “Are you planning to give me one too? I don’t think you can afford it.”
“That’s very unprofessional of you.” Declan colored.
Jager got up, taking his notepad and pen with him. “Thank you for cooperating, I’ll call you both if we need anything.”
“You will file a report about the missing CD, right?” LeeLee asked.
“You’d have to come down to the police station if your house was broken into.” Corporal Jager said. “For now, I’m going to ask Mr. Hanson some questions.”
Staying behind, Victoria turned to speak to Declan and LeeLee.
Chapter 7
“Is this about your payment?” LeeLee said irritably. “If it is, you can just go away. I have no time for things like that right now.
“I wanted to see how you liked the food yesterday,” Victoria said. “I also wanted to tell you that it was an absolute honor to be serving at your party. I’ll bet the ancient emperors of Rome would be proud of this one.”
Immediately, LeeLee softened, blushing and laughing. So Steve had been right, after all, Victoria thought. LeeLee was less concerned about the murder and more annoyed that her grand party had been spoilt.
“Well, I do have a certain genius for planning these things,” LeeLee said. “It doesn’t come easy. You’re either born with it, or you aren’t.”
“Oh definitely,” Victoria said, flattering her shamelessly. “It’s a kind of aesthetic genius to plan the right party. I feel like it was the best catering job I’ve ever had the pleasure of doing.” This last part wasn’t entirely a lie. Victoria had indeed felt very happy with her work.
“I have to write you a check, don’t I?” LeeLee, still beaming, tore out a check and signed it. “There you go. Full, with a little bonus on top.”
“Thank you!” Victoria said, delighted.
Declan, next to LeeLee, was looking a little upset. “Well, I suppose the food was alright. There was a senator who told me the drinks felt a little watered down.” He gave her a suspecting look, and Victoria resisted the flare of temper she felt.
“Oh if it’s Senator Dashwood, everything tastes watery to him because he’s used to gulping down Vodka by the bottle,” LeeLee said. “Victoria’s a very honest woman.”
“Of course, she is,” Declan said, looking grumpy still.
“In fact, I wanted to ask you if you’d consider catering at our wedding, Victoria dear,” LeeLee said. “Declan and I are planning a wedding three months from now.”
“Oh.” Victoria cringed. So were Steve and Amanda. “When would that be?”
“The dates aren’t fixed yet,” LeeLee said. “But we’re thinking of doing it right here in the charming historical town chapel. I love Larch Hot Springs, you know. It’s one of the most beautiful towns I’ve ever been to. I never had a home, what with growing up in an orphanage. But I used to watch movies and wish that I could be part of a small town one day. Of course, I also wanted to be part of expeditions, of big city parties, and of political powerhouses. I was a very imaginative young child.”
“You’re still very imaginative,” Victoria smiled. “Most people lose that when they grow up.”
“Oh, but there is no success in a creative field if you can’t keep the child inside you curious and hungry,” LeeLee said.
“I’ve often thought that myself,” Victoria said.
“Tell me, dear, is it true that you once wrote true crime novels?” LeeLee asked.
“My husband did most of the work, but I was a co-author,” Victoria said.
“I think I read one of yours about a serial killer who was obsessed with gardening his venus fly traps.”
“Ah yes. The Greenhouse Garrotter.” Victoria said. “He was a nasty man.”
“Do you think…” LeeLee said. “If a person around you were plotting a murder or had committed one, do you believe you would recognize it? In their eyes I mean?”
Victoria shook her head. “Unlikely.” She said.
“Why not?”
“Humans aren’t just one thing, that’s why not,” Victoria said. “I’ve known men who were out and out cruel to everyone they could meet. They were products of truly terrible environments. I interviewed a spree killer once who had killed his mother, his brother, his sister-in-law, and his seven nieces and nephews. By all accounts, the man was just a humble salesman, so meek he could barely ask
for a raise. Yet something spurred him to take a gun and shoot down his entire family. No, sometimes a demon comes into a man and makes him commit the most atrocious of crimes. Sometimes, there’s just a vein of cruelty hidden deep within. The only thing we can do, really, is to solve a crime after it’s happened.”
“Yes,” LeeLee said. She had her fingers steepled under her chin. “Yes. You are right. But did it ever give you a feeling of power? When you figured out who had committed a crime?”
“I wasn’t a detective,” Victoria said. “Though Michael and I did find evidence that one man was innocent.”
“Michael?”
“My husband.” Victoria reminded her.
“Oh yes. Of course.” LeeLee looked at her. “You loved him very much, did you not?”
“I did,” Victoria said. “I’ll never forget him, no matter what.”
“No, you never will.” LeeLee nodded. “But it won’t harm you to move on, to find a new person to love, either.”
“I have my family.”
“Family will fill some part of your heart but there’s a void that only a new love can fill,” LeeLee said. “You’ll find out. You’re young still so take advantage of it. That Corporal Jager for instance...”
Victoria blushed. “We are only friends, Mrs. Brunt.”
LeeLee laughed. “Oh please. I must be as experienced with romance as you are with crime and I tell you that I can see sparks between people even when they themselves can’t. That man is quite fond of you.”
Changing the topic, Victoria said, “Why did you wonder if I can spot a murderer?”
LeeLee looked at her as if surprised she hadn’t guessed. “Because, of course, the murderer must have been at my party last night.” She said. “As the caterer, you had a chance to observe everyone silently. Surely you might have seen or heard something?”
Victoria shook her head. “I remember seeing the victim yesterday, but no one else. She only drank water. I remember being surprised because everyone else was indulging in champagne.”
“Ah,” LeeLee smiled. “That’s a big clue, wouldn’t you say?”
“How so?” Victoria asked.
“Isn’t it obvious?” LeeLee asked. “I never touch a drink myself, you know.”