by Melissa Huie
“That’s fine,” I muttered. She helped me pull on the yoga capris and T-shirt that Sarah had brought over. I felt like a child when she pulled on my socks and sneakers. The nurse sat me in the wheelchair and rolled me out into the lobby. It was close to midnight. I could see Mom’s blue sedan at the front entrance. With the nurse’s help, I managed to slide into the passenger seat without hurting too much.
“Did anyone get my car?” I asked as I realized that my car was still in the firm’s parking lot. As much as I loved having my mom take care of me, there was a limit to the amount of coddling I could take. I would need the ability to escape.
“Bob and Tommy brought it back to my house,” she replied vaguely. I slowly turned to look at her.
“Tommy? As in Tommy Greene? Like my ex-fiancé Tommy? Why is he still around? I thought that after he busted Shane he’d be living it up back in New York with his FBI buddies,” I replied. I watched her expression to see if she was hiding anything from me.
“Yes, that Tommy. He stopped by the hospital as well. He’s concerned about you, Megs. He feels horrible about what happened. And honestly, I have to say that I’m glad he did what he did. I could kill Shane myself. He shot your brother. He brought drug dealers into your home. I don’t think I can ever forgive him.”
I stayed silent. I knew she was right. I knew that what Shane did was unforgivable. But at the same time, the pain of losing him only deepened with the knowledge that he was going to be a father. That he would never know about his child, that I was carrying. I turned and stared out the window as the highway gave way to the huge houses and big lots that made up my hometown. We turned down my mother’s street and a wave of nostalgia hit me. I remembered riding my bike down those streets, playing kickball and hide-and-seek. Things were so much simpler then. What I wouldn’t give to have that innocence back, to not know the dangers of a broken heart, to not feel the pain of betrayal.
Mom helped me inside and into my old room. My mom had never changed my bedroom. It still had the peach walls, blue carpeting, and white furniture of my childhood. But gone were the rock posters, which had been replaced with family photos. She settled me into bed and Penny jumped up to join me.
“Go to sleep, sweetie. You need to rest,” she said gently, as she tucked my hair behind my ear and kissed my forehead. Just like when I was a kid. I choked back the tears.
“Mom, thanks for everything. I love you,” I whispered. She smiled.
“I love you too. You’ll know soon enough. There isn’t anything you won’t do for your children.” And with that, she headed out of the bedroom.
I rubbed Penny’s ears and thought about what she said. She never failed to insert words of wisdom when I least expected it.
“So, Penny, are you ready to have a baby in the house?” I whispered. Penny just gazed at me with her brown eyes and thumped her tail, then gave a wide yawn and closed her eyes. I followed suit.
* * *
I slept horribly that night and woke the next morning feeling mangled. The drugs had knocked me out. I felt so stiff and sore. My right side was throbbing and pulsing. I needed to get out of bed, but every move I tried made me want to scream out in agony. I cursed the bastard who did this to me and wished I could shoot hot irons under his fingernails. Helpless, I gave in. This wasn’t going to work. I wasn’t going to be able to do this alone.
“Mom! I need to pee! Can you please help me?” I wailed pitifully. Our walls were thin so I could hear her rattling in the kitchen. Footsteps came down the hall and I was so glad to hear the door open. However, I wasn’t so glad to see the face that poked in.
“What are you doing here?” I grumbled. I really didn’t want Tommy’s help going to the bathroom. It would be so awkward. “Where’s my mom?” I demanded, as I struggled to get up. Apparently, the flailing of my arms and legs amused him, because he busted out with laughter.
“You look like a fish out of water!” he said, masking his laugh with a cough. “Here. Let me help you.” He managed to pull me out of bed with the least amount of pain possible. I suffered through the embarrassment long enough; I gave him my evil glare.
“Thanks. I think I can manage fine now,” I muttered as I shuffled my way to the bathroom.
“Are you sure? I can come in and help you,” he called out. I gave him the middle finger over my shoulder and closed the bathroom door. This freaking sucks. I glanced in the mirror and groaned. I looked like I had gone ten rounds in a boxing ring. My face was a rainbow of colors. My eye was swollen with shades of purple and red, with my cheek and jaw line a psychedelic swirl of yellows and greens. I looked like a monster. I used the bathroom and debated about jumping into the shower but decided against it. I didn’t have any clothes with me and I would be damned if I was going to let Tommy see me naked. I opened the door and shuffled to the kitchen. Tommy was pouring a cup of coffee when I walked in. I sat down at the table and he handed it to me.
“I already added your creamer. There’s your juice. You’re due for another round of pain meds,” he said cheerfully. He brought my pain pills over and sat down across from me. I swallowed them with the juice then picked up my mug.
“Thanks,” I said dryly. “Where’s my mom?”
“She went to the grocery store. I offered to babysit while she was gone.”
“Yeah, well, I’m up now. I don’t need a sitter,” I mumbled. I didn’t want him to have the satisfaction of me having to depend on him.
“Well, I did have an ulterior motive. I wanted to talk to you,” Tommy said softly.
“I really don’t think I want to talk to you right now, Tommy. I don’t think you have anything to say that I want to hear,” I replied wearily.
“Look. I get it. You’re pissed. And you have every right to be. But you have to understand what’s going on,” he replied tersely.
“Fine. What is so important that you had to come over here?” I retorted, meeting his gaze.
“I’m sorry for busting Shane like that. But you have to know the truth. You’re in danger, Megan.”
I scoffed. “Really? What gave you that idea? Because some asshole beat the shit out of me? All because he was looking for Shane? Who, by the way, is out on bail. Did you know that?”
“No. He’s not out on bail,” Tommy replied slowly.
“Well, that guy thinks he is. And I want to know why I wasn’t told. Why didn’t anyone tell me? Why didn’t he call me?” I said as angry tears welled up. Crap. I didn’t want to cry in front of Tommy.
“Shane isn’t out on bail. He was moved to a safe house.”
“Uh. Okay. Why?” I was confused. I knew a little bit about the prison system because of my uncle and father. I knew it was not normal procedure for felons to be transported to a safe house unless they were going to rat someone out. “Is he going to talk and cop a plea?”
“Well, yeah. He works for us,” he said softly.
Chapter 22
“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU talking about? Shane is FBI?” What the hell was going on around here? Another lie? Couldn’t anyone get their freaking story straight?
“Well, not really. It’s complicated.”
“Oh yeah? Well, apparently I have time to kill. So indulge me,” I replied as I cautiously leaned back in the chair.
“Well, first, let me fix you breakfast. You need something in your stomach for that medication.” Tommy quickly got up and busied himself in the fridge. “Um. What do you eat for breakfast?” Seriously? Did he just ask me that? I had a quick and nasty retort ready but I bit my tongue. In the three years that we were together, we only had breakfast together a handful of times. We were always rushing around in the mornings; we barely said hello.
“Cereal is fine,” I replied. Tommy seemed relieved at the ease of the task and brought me a bowl and spoon, the milk, and the box of Cheerios.
“Thanks,” I said as I poured the milk and let the cereal soak and turn soggy. “Now start talking.”
Tommy cleared his throat. “Um. Okay. Well, a
bout two years ago, we got a tip that Ricardo Cruz, a.k.a Reggie Cruz, was in the area. He’s on the DEA’s most wanted list. He’s a bad man, Megan. Drugs, guns, extortion, everything. You name it, he’s got his grubby fingers in it.”
“Two years ago? What does Shane have to do with this? How did he get involved?”
“Shane was arrested for dealing about a year and a half ago. I think he was relieved he was finally caught. He had so much information that we wanted to use him. He was our confidential informant. He made a plea with the feds to get out of the charge of dealing by helping to bring Reggie and his crew down. As far as Reggie and the like know, Shane went to jail. And he did.”
I sat there, my spoon in midair, stunned. If I could have moved my jaw any lower, I would have. This was something I never expected. I would have never put Shane working with Tommy.
“You mean to tell me that he was dealing drugs the entire time you and I were together? Don’t you think I should have known? Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked slowly. How could Tommy have kept something this big from me?
“Megs, I couldn’t. There is a lot you don’t know about Shane. I couldn’t take away his cover like that. Shane was deeply involved, and I didn’t want you or anyone else to get hurt,” he said.
“Fine. Whatever. What about last week? Why didn’t you tell me then? That little tidbit of information would have been nice to have. That horrible scene at your office could have been avoided! Dammit, Tommy! He left thinking I hated him. Why did you let me hate him so much?” I exclaimed, tossing the spoon into the bowl. The milk splattered but I barely noticed. I was getting so mad at Tommy. And myself.
Tommy hesitated. “Megs, we weren’t sure how well this was going to go. We had to take him down when we went after Reggie and the rest of the crew. If we hadn’t, they would have figured out that he was a narc.”
I thought about Tommy’s earlier visit to my house. “What was up with the rant when you came over? Was that part of the story too?”
Tommy had the decency to look chagrined. “I told Shane that I never wanted you involved. I hated the fact that he was there. Personal reasons aside, if he was living with you, you were in even more danger. I tried to talk him out of it. But he kept saying that he could protect you. When your house got broken into, Shane started to realize that we were right.”
“So Reggie’s thugs were the ones who tore apart my house. Why?”
Tommy sighed. “We believe it was to send Shane a message. Apparently, word got out that he was living with you, a cop’s sister. That didn’t sit well with the organization so he sent a couple of low-level punks into your place. They staked out your house and kept tabs on Shane in the green Expedition. Reggie doesn’t want his dealers to be comfortable and relaxed. He’s a paranoid bastard and will send messages to remind them of the damage that he can inflict, and that he has eyes and ears everywhere. The break-in was Shane’s message.”
I was speechless. I couldn’t form a single word. I was shocked. Tommy took a breath and started again.
“Things were okay for a while. Shane kept his head low and didn’t make any noise. We kept in constant contact. He wore a hidden microphone whenever he met up with the crew. We started taking them down, one by one. People were getting scared and that’s when they started talking about a plant within their crew. To Reggie, everyone was a suspect. Eric was pissed. He started talking nonsense and pointing fingers. The discontent in the ranks got so bad that news spread to Christian, Reggie’s brother. Christian made the trip down from Jersey and within a day, Eric was dead. When Eric died, Shane panicked. He came to me for help and that’s when we started making arrangements for him to leave. He wanted to tell Reggie that he wanted out. But you can’t leave Reggie’s crew; not willingly anyway. He was scared to death that something might happen to you if he stayed. We were able to convince Shane to wait a day or so, but we knew he would run at the first chance. We were trying to hold off going in until we knew how they were getting the drugs into the country. We still don’t know who is supplying Reggie, but we had enough evidence to round up the mid-level and a couple higher-ups. Including Reggie. So we went with it. Arresting Shane was the only way we could get him out of there safely.” His eyes implored me to understand. I felt so crushed. Shane had lied out of necessity and the more I listened to Tommy’s explanation, the more upset I became.
“I said so many hurtful things to him. Oh my God. He must think I hate him,” I gasped. The tears that had been threatening to fall finally cascaded down my face. Everything I had thought about Shane was totally wrong. He wasn’t a lying jerk. He was trying to protect me.
“Shane was only doing what he thought was right. Megs, he felt horrible about lying to you. But you have to understand, he has been honest about everything except for this. He did move in with you because he truly didn’t have a place to go. The man was broke. But by the same token, he’s in love with you. The closer you two became, the harder it has been for him to come clean about this.”
I let out a shaky breath and closed my eyes. This felt so overwhelming. I couldn’t vocalize the thoughts that were swirling through my head.
“What about Kyle? Why did he shoot Kyle?” I asked numbly.
“Kyle was at the wrong place at the wrong time. Shane was acting as security for Reggie when a deal was going down. Kyle saw a group of men under the bridge and tried to investigate. Reggie’s men were armed and they don’t mess around. They have no issue killing a police officer. Before Kyle could get any closer, Shane shot him. Shane’s a damn good shot. Reggie and his crew fled the other way so they never saw Kyle. Shane shot him in order to protect him. He figured it was the only way.”
A heavy weight was lifted off my shoulders. He loves me. The words hit me like a ton of bricks. I was thrilled that he felt the same way I did, but mortified at my own behavior. I grasped at the threads, trying to piece together the very fabric of our torn relationship. I can salvage this, I thought. Everything that had gone wrong could be made right again. If only I could talk to him, tell him how much I love him. We can still work. We can be a family.
“I need to see him, Tommy. I need to tell him I’m sorry,” I said firmly as I furiously brushed away the tears.
Tommy sighed with regret. “I’m sorry, Megan. You can’t. I don’t know where he is. The federal marshals have that information and I’m not privy to it. He’s in protective custody now and will be for a very long time.”
Any hope that I had of seeing him again quickly deflated. “Why is he in protective custody?”
“He is now a wanted man by the rest of Reggie’s crew. Reggie managed to get himself out on bail, and as we now know, some of his thugs are still out there.”
I sat there and tried to absorb it all. This was so much to take in. “So you mean to tell me that I will never see him again? I won’t be able to talk to him?”
Tommy hesitated and then said, “Honestly, Megs, I’m not sure. We still have the rest of the gang to pick up. It will be at least until Reggie goes to trial. And we both know how long that could take.”
“Well that’s fucking lovely,” I muttered. I pushed away my bowl and coffee. “I’m done with this. I need to get dressed. I need to go home.”
Anger flicked in his eyes. “Yeah. About that. We’re assuming it was Reggie’s crew that went through your house yesterday. They didn’t destroy anything, but your home alarm went off at four thirty yesterday afternoon. The alarm company contacted your mother when they couldn’t get a hold of you.”
Suddenly feeling exhausted, I leaned back and rubbed my eyes. “The jerk that attacked me said that they had come through and that’s how they figured Shane had left. No one could find his things because I went through it all last week and put it in storage. Shit. What are we telling my mom? She doesn’t know what happened yesterday.”
“The truth,” he said simply. I stared at him in disbelief. Was he serious?
“The truth? Why would you say that? I mean, I know honesty is the
best policy, but really? In this situation? She is already going through the roof that Shane shot Kyle. That he lied to everyone else. She is going to freak out and be paranoid that someone is out to get me. She’ll go nuts trying to protect me!” I sputtered as I tried to paint the only possible scenario.
Tommy just shook his head. “Your mom isn‘t stupid. She‘s put two and two together. She‘s not buying the story your uncle gave her and truth be told, she’s pretty pissed that he lied to her. But aside from that, you’re not getting the point. These people are dangerous. You were lucky last night. It could have been much worse. Reggie’s crew is out to get you. They are at least going to be watching to see if you have any contact with Shane. They are going to try to draw him out. It isn’t going to be safe for you here. You and your mom need to go away for a while. We can set you up in a nice house, take the dogs with you—”
“Hell No!” I glared at him. “I’m not letting these crazy-ass fools think they can drive me away. This is my house. My life. They already screwed up Shane’s. This isn’t going to happen to me again. I refuse to leave my family, my friends, and my life because some street-urchin thug is looking for Shane. I’m not going to run scared every time I turn the corner or see a stranger. I’m not going to do it,” I seethed.
I was wiped. My little rant had taken a lot out of me. Either that or the pain meds were finally kicking in. I stood up despite the protest from my knocking knees. “I think I need to lie down,” I whispered. Tommy rushed to my side and supported my weight as he helped me down the hallway and into my bed. I gingerly rolled onto my side and he sat on the floor next to my bed.