by Andrew Cope
‘Good luck, pups!’ woofed Lara as they headed off in different directions.
‘Don’t worry, Mum, we’ll make you proud!’ yapped Star over her shoulder.
The pups kept their heads high until Lara and the Cooks had disappeared around the corner, but then their tails drooped in unison.
‘I’m nervous, bro,’ admitted Star.
‘Me too,’ agreed Spud. ‘Do you think we can pass their tests?’
‘We’ll try our best,’ said Star. ‘And the prof said he’s brought some really good gadgets for us.’
Spud’s tail perked up as he eyed the black bag that Professor Cortex was carrying. He loved gadgets. ‘I wonder what they are?’
‘Let’s go and find out,’ yapped Star, hurrying after the bag.
A few minutes later, Spud and Star were alone with Professor Cortex in a small room. ‘Don’t worry, pups,’ said Professor Cortex, his eyes sparkling as he unzipped the black bag. ‘Whatever tests the FBI have in store for you, these gadgets will help. I designed them with Big City spying in mind – and I think they’re my best yet!’
Professor Cortex lifted two black harnesses from the bag. ‘This one’s for you, Star,’ he said, holding up the slightly smaller harness.
Star nodded approvingly as the professor clipped the harness straps into place. A little black outfit. The classic choice for a girl who wants to impress.
‘Now you, Spud,’ said Professor Cortex, slipping the second harness over Spud’s head. The harness straps wouldn’t quite fasten.
Hmm. Must’ve been that apple I ate in the limo, thought Spud, conveniently ignoring the three packets of cheese and onion crisps and bottle of lemonade he’d woofed down. He sucked in his tum and snapped the strap buckles shut. Yup, definitely going to have to cut down on the apples.
Star pointed to a switch on the harness. What’s this? she thought, flicking it on and off.
Professor Cortex waved his hands for her to stop. ‘That,’ he said proudly, ‘is a cloaking device.’
And? thought Star. What does it do?
‘With this you can get through any security gate. You simply hide in a bag and/or suitcase. Flick the switch like so … and this little spy pup disappears from scanners and radars.’
And why would I want to be invisible to a scanner? thought Spud. It’s not as if I’m going to be scanned at a supermarket checkout.
Professor Cortex continued, undaunted by the lack of any enthusiastic tail-wagging. ‘So, for example, you can get through airport security,’ he said, beaming brightly. ‘Benjamin can simply place you in his school bag, switch on your collar and you can pass through the scanner undetected. We can smuggle you to any country in the world. In total secret. Genius, if I say so myself.’
‘Very clever,’ woofed Star, finally wagging her tail in approval.
‘Glad you like it, Star,’ beamed Professor Cortex.
‘And this one?’ yapped Spud, pointing to a small dial.
‘Turn it and see,’ said the professor. ‘I’m sure this one will capture your attention, young Spud.’
Spud twisted the dial and a thin propeller blade sprang from the top strap of the harness. The propeller whirred and he was lifted into the air. ‘Whoo-hoo! Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s Superpup!’ yapped Spud as he rose up towards the ceiling.
‘Just twist the dial up or down to control your height,’ said Professor Cortex.
Spud twisted the dial the other way and sank gently back to the floor. The propeller came to a stop and folded back into the top strap of the harness.
‘The power cell will only give you two minutes of flight at a time,’ warned Professor Cortex. ‘But it’s enough to get you up to a high window or over a wall. After that, the power cell needs at least ten minutes to charge up again.’
‘Amazing, Prof!’ woofed Star, wagging her tail even harder. ‘I feel ready for anything now!’
‘Me too!’ yapped Spud, trotting over to the test lab door. ‘Come on, sis! Let’s show them what we’re made of!’
6. Testing Times
Spud eased the door open and the two pups slipped inside. A screen in front of the door stopped them from seeing what was ahead but, when they looked up, they could see that they were in a hall about the same size and height as a sports hall. There was a long window high up in the wall. The Cooks, Lara and Amy Whittle were lined up on the other side of the glass, gazing down at them. The professor had warned them that the FBI would set them a series of tests, both mental and physical. The puppies had done assault courses before, but nothing quite like this.
‘What now?’ asked Star, looking up at the viewing platform.
Just then Professor Cortex, Agents T and K and Agent Brad Onkers joined the rest of the watchers behind the glass. Amy Whittle gave them a nod. Agent Onkers scowled. Professor Cortex pushed his glasses back up to the bridge of his nose nervously and waved his crossed fingers at the puppies.
‘Here we go,’ yapped Spud as the screen in front of them slid away.
A voice announced their mission. ‘British Spy Dogs – you have various obstacles to overcome. This is the test we give to select our special agents from our standard agents. The world record time is five minutes, fourteen seconds, achieved by our very own Special Agent Bradley Onkers.’ Star cast her eyes over the assembled crowd. Onkers curled his lip.
He clearly wants to stay top dog, thought Star. Let’s see if we can knock him off his pedestal.
‘Your time starts as soon as you’ve chosen your weapon,’ boomed the voice.
Spud looked to his left and there was an array of firepower. Hand guns, tasers and automatic rifles. He was tempted by a bazooka. Too heavy, he decided, snatching at a water pistol. His sister went for a catapult and three pellets.
A huge digital clock started counting. The lights went out, the red numbers providing the only illumination. The pups’ eyes struggled to focus in the darkness and they nearly jumped out of their fur as an American voice boomed, ‘Special agents require special reactions. Eliminate the right people. One wrong shot will end the challenge.’
Suddenly, Star felt her hackles rise. She loaded a pellet into the catapult. There was a scream to the right and a bright light picked out a cardboard cut-out person. Spud and Star almost jumped out of their skins. Spud’s paw nearly pulled the trigger and his sister nearly twanged her catapult, but they saw the image was of an old lady.
The pups swivelled, alerted by an evil laugh behind them. A hooded figure with red eyes loomed at them. Spud resisted firing again, but only just. Twang! Star’s first pellet hit the hoodie between the eyes and the cardboard person toppled. ‘Nice shot, sis,’ panted Spud. The pups crept forward, the seconds ticking away. A teacher and a prisoner jumped out at them. Spud squirted his water pistol at the teacher. ‘Take that!’ he woofed. Mmm, that felt great!
His sister floored the escaped prisoner with pellet number two. ‘This is good fun!’
The lights came on, and the puppies blinked in the brightness.
Star pointed to a high fence stretching the width of the test lab. ‘Next challenge?’
‘Easy peasy!’ yapped Spud, trotting to the fence and then pressing the hover button on his harness.
‘Slow down!’ replied Star, running after him. ‘We don’t know what’s on the other side.’
But Spud’s paws had already left the ground. ‘Time’s ticking away, sis,’ he woofed, pointing to the clock. ‘Not enough time to think and plan.’
Star sighed and pressed her own hover button. She landed on the top of the fence, saving her valuable battery.
Spud braced his paws against the fence and pushed off into the air. He looked down. ‘Nothing, Star,’ he woofed. ‘It’s just a warehouse. I’ll land and check it out.’ The puppy turned down his hover dial and sank slowly to the ground.
‘See, sis? Nothing to worry about,’ yapped Spud.
‘I’m not so sure,’ barked Star, glancing around the dim yard. ‘I can smell something …’
Spud sniffed. ‘You’re right,’ he yapped uneasily. ‘Let’s move on. There’s a door over there.’
Spud had only taken a couple of steps when a deep, threatening growl came from the darkest corner of the yard.
7. Safe House
Spud gulped. ‘H-hello? Who’s there?’
Out of the shadows stepped the biggest, meanest-looking dog he had ever seen.
‘WHO ARE YOU?!’ roared the dog, with drool spraying from its jaws.
‘E-excuse me?’ yapped Spud. ‘Did you spray something?’
‘THIS YARD IS MINE. THIS IS MY TERRITORY AND I’M NOT SHARING IT WITH ANYONE.’
‘Th-that’s absolutely f-fine.’ Spud tried to sound calm, but his voice was wobbling. ‘It’s a lovely yard. You can have the yard. I’ll just nip across and be out of your way.’ He set off towards the door, but the dog bared its teeth and lunged at him. The puppy dodged the huge animal, but slipped on some slobber and went face first into the floor. Ouch!
The yard dog was four times the size of Spud. The huge animal turned and growled menacingly, baring its huge teeth.
Spud considered his options. My black belt karate might be useful, but one swipe of the massive mutt’s paw and I’ll be knocked sideways. And if I mess with those jaws, it’s going to be even worse! And he’s guarding the exit so I can either go round him or through him. The massive dog lunged. Or over him! The spy pup hit his hover button and the propeller lifted him into the air.
‘COME BACK HERE!’ roared the dog, snapping at Spud’s dangling paws.
‘Ha! Can’t catch me now, bonehead!’ Spud laughed and wiggled his paws, which made the dog jump even higher. He turned up his hover dial but, instead of rising, he began to fall. Oops! My power cell’s used up! He looked down at the snapping jaws below. Goodbye, world!
His propeller was slowing and his descent quickening. Spud pulled up his paws as he sank towards the dog’s sharp teeth. The dog jumped up, but just as it was about to take a bite out of his bum, Star swooshed across the room and caught her brother by his collar.
The beast’s jaws crashed shut. The dog shook his head in anger, but Star and Spud weren’t out of trouble just yet. Spud’s extra weight on Star’s propeller meant that they were hanging at a dangerously low level in the air. The dog only had to catch up with them to be able to bite puppy bottoms with one leap.
Star turned up the hover dial to full power and the pups willed the propeller to move them faster across to the other side of the room, away from the rapidly approaching saliva-covered jaws of the dog. ‘We’re almost there!’ woofed Spud.
They reached the barrier just as Star’s battery ran out. Scrambling over, the puppies collapsed on the floor with a thud.
‘Phew! Thanks, Star,’ woofed Spud, rubbing his bottom. ‘Still, better to have a sore tail than no tail at all!’
Star looked at the clock. ‘We’ve got exactly sixty seconds left. If we want to beat Onkers, that is.’
The puppies looked around at the next part of their challenge. They were in a warehouse set-up, with crates stacked up all around them, but there was one clear pathway stretching all the way from their paws to the exit door at the far end of the test lab.
‘Look, Spud,’ cried Star. ‘We’re nearly there! All we have to do is run to the exit. Come on!’
‘Wait!’ yapped Spud. ‘We can’t use that pathway!’
Star stopped and frowned at her brother. ‘Why not?’
Spud pointed. ‘See those thin red lines of light all the way along? They’re laser beams. If we cross one of those beams, it’ll set off an alarm.’
‘So how do we get to the exit?’ asked Star.
Spud’s tail began to wag. ‘Free-running!’ he woofed, eyeing the stacks on each side of the pathway. ‘Ready, sis?’
‘Ready!’
Spud leapt to the right and Star leapt to the left. Together, they raced down each side of the pathway, jumping from crates, bouncing off walls of shelving, rolling down ramps and leaping across gaps. For the last few metres, there was a criss-cross of laser beams that was impossible to navigate. ‘This is ridiculous,’ panted Spud. ‘They’ve designed it so it’s impossible to complete.’
‘Nothing’s impossible,’ replied his sister. ‘Remember, this is a test of brains as well as fitness.’ Star looked around the huge room. The clock was ticking away. She spied a small box, high up in the corner of the room, a red light blinking. ‘That’s the power supply to the lasers,’ she woofed. Star fumbled for her catapult. She reached for her last pellet. ‘A crucial shot,’ she said, taking aim and squinting at the blinking light.
Spud watched the digital clock ticking down. Twelve seconds to go! he thought as Star released the catapult with a satisfying twang. The pups held their breath as the missile bulleted across the room and smashed into the power supply. There was a fizzing sound and some smoke. Then the red light went out and the lasers disappeared.
‘Go, go, go,’ they heard the professor shout. Star sprinted for the finishing line and hit a big red button. She looked at the clock. It had stopped at five minutes twelve seconds. She high-fived her brother. ‘We’ve beaten Agent Unfriendly by two seconds,’ she wagged. ‘We are now officially top dogs at the FBI.’
When they trotted on to the viewing platform a few minutes later, everyone gave them a round of applause, even Special Agent Brad Onkers.
‘So, Agent Onkers,’ said Professor Cortex. ‘Do you still think they’re just a pair of mucky pups?’
‘Not at all,’ said Onkers, watching Spud and Star thoughtfully with narrowed eyes. ‘I admit I completely underestimated them. A very interesting choice of weapons. And shooting a teacher with a water pistol to embarrass instead of hurt, very impressive. I can think of a very good use for those gadgets and those skills.’
‘Tell us more about your Spy Dog programme, Professor,’ said Amy Whittle.
Professor Cortex went pink with pride. Happily, he began to explain the spy training and the accelerated learning programme the pups had been through. The FBI field director listened with interest, but Brad Onkers never stopped staring at Spud and Star.
‘Looks like we’ve gained a fan,’ whispered Star, nudging Spud.
‘He’s changed his tune,’ yapped Spud as Brad gave him a big cheesy grin.
‘And Star can speed-read, in several languages,’ continued Professor Cortex. ‘And I’d put Spud up against your best code-breaker any day. Of course Lara here is their mum. She was an extra-clever dog, even before she started taking my brain formula, and she’s passed on her genes to them.’
Lara tried to look modest. No, really, I’m nothing special. Just because I can do a Rubik’s cube in under a minute, beat the prof at chess and sort out Mr Cook’s tax return …
‘Professor, you and your amazing Spy Dogs have convinced me that this is a project the FBI would like to pursue: with your help, of course,’ said Amy Whittle. ‘I’m giving you top security clearance.’
‘Thanks!’ said Professor Cortex, turning an even brighter pink.
‘Can you and your men fly to Washington with me tonight? I’d like to introduce you to the head of the FBI.’
‘Of course,’ spluttered Professor Cortex. ‘But what about my Spy Dogs, and the Cooks?’
‘Agent Onkers will look after them, won’t you, Agent?’
‘Don’t worry, ma’am,’ said Brad. ‘I’ll take very, very special care of them.’
‘This isn’t our hotel,’ said Mr Cook as the stretch limo pulled up outside a dark house.
‘No, sir,’ said Agent Onkers from the driving seat. ‘This is an FBI safe house.’
‘But – we were looking forward to the hotel,’ said Mrs Cook, thinking of the lively, friendly-looking place they had booked on the internet.
‘This is much more luxurious, ma’am,’ said Onkers. ‘En suites in every bedroom. I’m sure you’re looking forward to a hot bath.’
‘But the hotel was next to some good restaurants,’ protested Ben, g
azing at the quiet street of houses. ‘We were going out for pizza.’
Spud’s eyes widened and his tail sprang into action.
‘I’ll have some delivered,’ said Onkers, with a hint of annoyance creeping in under his smile.
Bonkers has got an answser for everything, thought Star. What’s he up to? She looked at Spud, but he was still drooling at the thought of pizza.
‘I don’t want to stay here,’ declared Ollie, folding his arms.
‘It’s not up to you, son!’ snapped the American.
Ollie looked upset. Spud forgot about filling his tum and snuggled up against his favourite member of the Cook family. He glared at Onkers. Watch it, FBI!
‘You’re wrong,’ said Sophie stiffly. ‘It is up to Ollie. He has as much say as anyone in this family.’
‘Well said, Soph!’ yapped Star, standing up and facing Onkers with her hackles raised.
Brad Onkers looked at the eight rebellious faces in the limo. ‘Hey,’ he said, raising his hands in a gesture of surrender. ‘I’m sorry, guys. I’m only trying to do my job. My boss told me to look after you, and that means keeping you safe. These two pups are really something,’ he said, gazing greedily at Spud and Star. ‘I have big plans for them tomorrow and I wouldn’t want anything to happen to the little guys before then. If you’re out wandering the streets of New York, I can’t guarantee their safety.’
‘Well …’ Mrs Cook hesitated. ‘Maybe just for tonight –’
‘Great!’ Brad hustled them out of the limo and herded them into the FBI safe house before anyone had a chance to change their mind. Five minutes later, after promising to pick them up first thing in the morning, Agent Onkers had driven away, leaving them in a house filled to the rafters with alarms and panic buttons.
‘Bonkers was right; this really is a safe house,’ woofed Lara, nodding at the bars on the windows. ‘They’d keep anything out.’