by Sandy Nathan
“He dug out that entire hall and brought the spiders in to get better ratings.” She started to laugh, semi-hysterical. “He did it for ratings. We were fighting for our lives, and he wanted ratings.
“He wanted me.” She shuddered. “He wanted to take me to a moon of his planet and film us fucking for their TV.” She raised her face, furious. “He wanted me to marry him. When I told him that I was married to Sam and didn’t want him, he burned up the hall.
“Everything is ashes down there. Before the doctor arrived, Sam went into a tunnel to find his people. I saw the fire race after him, down the hole he’d used.”
“Did you see Ellie? She flew down there.”
“Oh, yes! She saved my life.”
They gathered around her.
“Ellie saved Wes, too,” Mel broke the silence. “The spider poison was killing him. She stung him in the chest, and he came to.”
Wes smiled ruefully and waved his hand.
“Look at that!” Bud said. Ellie burst out of the underground, wings smoking, carrying something close to her body. She landed lightly and set down her load. It was a charred figure. She took off again immediately, shrieking something at them in a high-pitched buzz. They were to get Sam’s clothes off. Now! And then she disappeared back down the hole.
Jeremy jumped toward the motionless form. He tried to unzip Sam’s suit, but the fasteners were melted closed. He pulled out a pocketknife, which did nothing. Sam’s suit was smoking like Ellie had been, but the suit had a toxic smell. They knew it would kill him if his burns didn’t.
“Let me try,” Bud said. He closed his eyes in prayer and mumbled something. When he opened his eyes, he ran his finger down Sam’s torso. The suit opened. Bud sliced his helmet and goggles off. They were fused together. Then he ran his finger the length of his arms and legs. The others peeled the suit off as soon as Bud loosened it. Wesley crawled forward and helped with the small pieces that Bud had missed. Sam was unconscious. He might be alive, though they couldn’t see him breathing or feel a pulse.
They continued to peel off his clothes. Something fell out of his suit. A couple of somethings. One was a book. Bud picked it up. The pages opened and glittering letters appeared. The pages turned by themselves, light flashing from the interior.
“It’s the Book,” Jeremy said. “He went in there to get it.” Jeremy picked it up. “This is part of Ellie’s notebook from the golden world. It wrote down all the stuff I said at the end, the Commands. It’s Sam’s Bible.”
He felt tears on his face. Sam died for this? The other thing that fell out of his suit was a satin jewelry bag. It was his mother’s; he recognized it. It must contain some of her jewels. Sam died to bring her a gift?
Bud and Wes continued to slice pieces off Sam’s suit. Their system worked until they got to his lower legs and feet. There, the suit had fused to Sam’s flesh. Bud and Wes worked carefully, separating Sam from the fabric. Their faces became grave when they saw the burns. His lower legs were charred. The skin was gone in places, with muscles and tendons exposed. They couldn’t get his shoes off without taking too much of him.
The commando suit was smoking. They dumped the pieces at the far end of the pasture by the cliff that overlooked the sea. It looked like it might go up in flames. And so did Sam’s shoes, but they were still on him.
Ellie reappeared, her legs wrapped around another person. He was obviously alive: His eyes rolled in terror. She set the newcomer down and went to work on Sam. Her stingers came out and she zapped Sam twice, then a third time, over the heart. Sam’s eyes fluttered. She waved her wings over him, and he woke up, making a horrible sobbing groan.
Ellie landed and sat next to his legs. She bent over the burnt areas. Something came out of her mouth, a foamy, frothy white stuff. She coated his legs, sealing them. Then she worked very carefully to remove the boots. His feet looked like barbecued meat. She squealed and they got what she meant—get those boots out of here, pronto.
Bud threw them onto the pile and the whole thing ignited. The fumes were horrible. Ellie stopped working for a minute and flew to the fire, sweeping the toxic smoke to sea with her wings. Bud followed her, raising his arms. The burning uniform shot over the cliff and into the ocean.
Cooing softly, Ellie treated Sam’s feet. When she was done, he was wearing hard boots of the white stuff on his feet and legs. She told them by squeaks and squeals to cover him and keep him warm.
She turned to the second person she’d rescued, and looked him over. He required a shock to the heart and some white stuff on his feet and lower body. He was conscious and very surprised.
Ellie rose from the field and reentered the underground.
The group looked at the newcomer. He was a little person, a dwarf. Gray, like the others. He sat up and looked at them, dumbfounded, but alive and alert.
“I’m Jeremy Edgarton,” Jeremy said, extending his hand. “Welcome to our community.”
“I’m Jim Bob.” The little person shook back, ducking his head and looking awed.
Their meeting was cut short. “I think we’re going to have to get going very soon,” Jeremy said. A shimmering golden mist appeared in the area over the underground’s main hall. It rose, forming a tall column of yellow smoke with a pointed top. The earth quivered.
“Let’s get going.”
“Not without Ellie!” Jeremy cried.
“You guys go,” Bud said. “We’ll pack up Sam and … Jim Bob.”
They tried to figure out how to transport Sam. They finally laid him over a bareback horse with Bud riding in back. The little person sat on Wes’s horse with Wes riding behind him. He looked as terrified as he had flying out of the underground in Ellie’s grip.
Jeremy wouldn’t depart until Ellie came out, even through what was happening over the meadow told him he should leave. The golden column of smoke was beautiful. It rose majestically, creating circular ripples along the ground. The middle of it formed concentric circles, so that it looked like Jupiter with rings around a tall central spire. He had no doubt it would blow.
Ellie wobbled out of the hole, her entire body smoking and singed. She carried two bodies with her, both in worse shape than the others. She chided him in her insect talk, telling him to leave. She flew toward their camp with the survivors.
He ran to follow her. They headed to their camp, where the children and Lena waited. The golden column and the ground under it rumbled. Finally, he heard a crack!
“Run!” Jeremy screamed as he caught up with the others. “It’s going to blow!”
They ran, passing the body of a Big splattered with gunfire. It must have been Lena’s work. They passed another, and another.
Lena was standing in front of the tent, her machine gun in her hands.
“Oh, Lord! I thought I’d never see you again.” A stampede of horses and people ran toward her. She stood up and raised her hands, shouting, “Thank you, Jesus! Thank you for takin’ care of us!” And then she hugged Henry.
“Get down!” Jeremy shouted.
They could see the gold column in the distance. It dropped to the ground, exploded, and then rose into the air, a perfect mushroom cloud.
Jeremy watched it. Was it radioactive? He ran into the tent, almost stumbling on the kids who were covered in the bulletproof suits. “Hi, kids,” he said, grabbing a Geiger counter. Given the way his life had gone, Jeremy always kept one handy.
He went out in the meadow by their camp and set the instrument up. He moved toward the meadow over the underground. That’s where the radioactive readings would be strongest. He backtracked sufficiently to see the site of the old mansion and the shelter. The entire area had sunk as the underground’s main hall collapsed, forming a deep, flat depression. The underground was sealed forever. They would have died if they’d remained where they were. Ellie got them to leave in time. His instruments didn’t register any radioactivity. Whatever it was that blew up, it wasn’t radioactive.
He turned back to the camp and found Ell
ie ministering to the newest members of their clan, the two she’d rescued before everything blew up. One was a boy with perfectly developed arms and trunk, but stubs of legs. The third might have been a boy or a girl. The child was draped; Jeremy couldn’t see. It was very small and its eyes were milky. It must be blind.
When Jeremy came close, the blind child said, “Jeremy,” in a perfectly understandable voice.
“You know I’m here?”
“We all knew you were here.”
Jeremy bit his lip, shaking. “I’m really sorry.”
The child, or whatever he or she was, asked, “Why should you be sorry?”
“Because I didn’t save all of you.”
“You saved the ones you were meant to save. My name is Martin. Jack is with me.” He held out his hand, pointing it directly at Jeremy, and nodding his head at the legless boy.
Wes and Bud began clean-up duty, incinerating what was left of the Bigs’ bodies after the dogs ravaged them. They worked fast. Jeremy could see Grandfather and the ancestors moving with them, giving them strength.
Jeremy flopped on the ground. He heard Ellie humming, tending to the sick. Tending to the children. Humming and buzzing.
He knew he’d never touch her again, but they could have a life together. They could sit together by her tree. It didn’t have to be a regular life like everyone had. He was one of the most open-minded people in the world. He didn’t care what she was. She was Ellie.
He closed his eyes.
Part Three
50
Jeremy stood, blinking the sleep out of his eyes, then looked around the burnt-out campfire. His muscles hurt more than he thought possible. Every step reminded him of the battle the day before. He moved stiffly, but as quietly as he could. The sack Ellie had made—whatever it was—hung from the oak a hundred yards behind the camp.
It was larger than when he’d seen it last. Its gray, papery exterior looked like the wasps’ nests he’d seen in the olden times, but this one was four feet across. It almost looked like a cabbage, attached to the oak’s limb by a heavy stalk. Broad, flat leaves were wrapped around a mass inside. Eggs? How could that be? Ellie carried her babies internally.
He wanted to find Ellie and thank her for everything that she’d done. But she wasn’t perched on the limb above her sack as she had been before the battle.
Jeremy poked around, circling farther from their camp. He walked past a massive oak and stopped.
Ellie lay on the ground, fallen on her side. It looked like a chunk of her abdomen had broken in; a piece maybe eight inches square was gone from one of the plates of her belly. He could see inside her. She was hollow. Nothing inside. No bug guck. No white stuff. She was empty.
“Ellie,” he said. She didn’t answer. She would never answer, not even with an angry buzz. She was hollow because the white stuff she’d spread over everyone’s injuries was her. She’d killed herself saving the others.
Jeremy’s eyes stung. His chest froze. He felt saliva at the edges of his mouth. He couldn’t move. This couldn’t happen. Nothing like this could happen.
“Ellie?” he bent forward and touched her. Her bulging belly disintegrated, shattering into hundreds of pieces. He bent and picked up a hunk, wanting to stop the terrible falling apart. The little chunk became dust in his hand.
The wind came, just a gust. Ellie’s wings caught it. They detached from her body soundlessly, not even making a pop. They tumbled along the ground. He ran after them.
Jeremy caught one wing, stuffed it under his arm, and chased the other one. He caught it and held them both to his chest. The wings’ front edge, a sturdy spine, was still intact, but some of the lovely iridescent material that held her aloft had shattered. No matter. He’d keep them. He put the wings under his arm and went back to where her body had been.
“Ellie!” he called, looking round. “Where are you?” He spun. “Where are you? You can’t die, Ellie. You’re not allowed to die.”
Nothing comforted him. Nothing spoke to him. No Commands or God or Great One. No Native American shaman or Buddhist monk appeared. Nothing came to him to wipe away his tears. That’s what he always got: nothing.
Ellie, you can’t leave me! What am I supposed to do? His soul screamed. He looked down and saw the most enduring part of her. Those little hooves. He had thought they were adorable when he first saw them. They made her seem like a little pony and let her dance en pointe without distorting her feet. They let her dance the way she had through the days and nights of their life together. Through love, and storms.
His mouth opened and he almost screamed. He stopped himself and picked up her hooves. The stingers were retracted. He put them in his pocket and ran.
He would never come back. He would never love anyone again. He never wanted to see anyone in this shitty world.
51
“I’ll keep an eye on him. You go back and get the others ready to break camp,” Bud said, sitting easily astride his horse. Wes and his mount were next to him, watching Jeremy run across the plain. He was heading toward the river. At least he’d get home going that way.
They stood on the rise where Lena had done her shooting.
Bud and Wes had done an early morning patrol, looking for dead bodies they’d missed the day before and any new spiders and Bigs. It looked like Lena had picked off everything that ran out the back way, but they wanted to make sure that nothing needing killing reared up anywhere. They got up at the break of dawn before anyone and saw Ellie’s body before Jeremy did. They debated telling him, but decided he’d find out soon enough. They had to reconnoiter.
The group had agreed that going back to the cliff by the river was the best bet. Too many bad things had happened where they were. Not to mention the view being ruined by the smoking pit of the underground.
“You watch Jeremy and I’ll try to get the camp going,” Wes said, wheeled his mount, and headed back to the impromptu encampment. “May take a couple days though. Those horses have never pulled a travois.”
Bud rode down the hill in the direction Jeremy had gone. He wanted to give him privacy to grieve, but make sure he didn’t do anything stupid. Once he got on the flat, he followed the tips of Ellie’s wings. He’d let Jeremy run until he slowed down by himself.
“I’m not going back, so don’t try to make me,” Jeremy shouted over his shoulder. “I knew you were following me.” They’d gone a fair stretch when Bud closed the distance between them.
“I’m not trying to take you back. I’m going to get poles for the travois,” Bud replied. “We got the little kids and the new people and Sam to get back to the cliff. They can’t walk.”
“Oh.” Jeremy slowed down.
“You can go your own way. The rattlesnakes are done hunting for the morning. You’ll be pretty safe.”
Jeremy slowed further.
“I did see some bear scat back there. Grizzlies were a real problem in California in the old days. They’d rear up twelve feet out of the grass. Real bad dispositions, too.”
“This isn’t California; it’s Connecticut.”
“Bullshit, Jeremy. You know as well as I do that this place is no place. This here grassland with the big oaks is California. I’ll tell you exactly where it is in California, too. It’s the Santa Ynez Valley, down by Santa Barbara before any humans got there.”
“I know. My mom had a ranch near there. It looked just like this.”
“So what do you think?”
“What do you mean?” Jeremy was walking very slowly, but still didn’t turn around.
“This place is bogus, Jeremy. It’s made up. Somebody made it up, and they’re keeping it going.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, what if Ellie’s people—and I want to tell you I’m sorry about her, Jeremy. She was a really good … person. And son, you’re losing a lot of her wings holding them like that. Why don’t you let me see if I can make them stronger?”
Jeremy stopped and turned toward Bud, holding the wi
ngs to his chest. He looked at them. They were eight feet long and did look ragged after his treatment of them. “What can you do to them?”
“I don’t know. I been doin’ so much magic lately, I thought something might come to me.” Bud swung off his horse, which didn’t take too kindly to the wings being waved around. The mare snorted loudly and pulled away. Bud handed Jeremy the reins. “Here, you hold her. I’ll see what I can do.”
When he put his hands on the wings, that Power that had been with him so much came over him. It came over the wings, too. For a moment, they were enveloped in blue light. Bud stood with his eyes closed. He opened them, and touched the wings.
“That’s better. They’re just as light and pretty, but I don’t think they’ll break.”
Jeremy took them back, squeezing his lips tight and holding Ellie’s remains hard against his chest.
“We might as well just walk along together. Boy, I sure am worried,” Bud said congenially. “I’ll be damned if I know how to get forty tree trunks back to the camp by myself with just this one horse. We need those for the travois poles. If I do get them back, I don’t know how we’re going to get all those kids and people back to the cliff through the woods. We could barely ride through on horses. The travois will be too wide. And if we walk along this oak savannah, what about the bears and wolves?
“If we make it through that, I don’t know how we’ll get them up the cliff to where we live. How will we lift Sam, for instance?”
“We have a big pulley,” Jeremy said. “It’s in the equipment container with the weapons.”
“OK. We just have to set a pulley in the rock and drag ‘em up. I don’t know how to do that. What’s going to happen when those kids start walking? They will, you know. Some good food and room to move, they’ll be walking. They’ll fall off the cliff. And how is that guy with no legs going to get around? I don’t know how to make a rig for him. You’d need wheels and who knows what.”