‘Maybe I don’t want to see you do that shit either,’ he tells me. I growl out my frustration.
‘Jared, seriously. I was the one they took. I was the one they tortured. ME! I could have ended up like Maiya! I want this, Jared! No, hell, I NEED this. I couldn’t sleep last night, Jared, you know why? Because all I could think about was them down here, and when I came and saw them, all I wanted to do was kick the shit out of them all. I understand you don’t want me in there with them, Jared, but please, please, don’t take this away from me.’
I was bordering on hysterical. I don’t think I even took a single breath throughout that whole speech. But I saw a shift in him. A look in his eye that told me he had taken in every word.
Well, when she put it like that, I could hardly fucking argue could I?’ I would give her just about anything she wanted, but if she NEEDED this, to sleep at night, who the fuck was I to take that from her? She was right. She was the one that went through it, not me. And I would have to let her into this shit some time. I just wanted her to remain pure—untainted by pack brutality. The truth behind our success as a pack was our capability to extract information, and it backed up our right to own the reputation of the strongest pack in Europe. It had been tried and tested many times, and we’d always come through on top. We’ve had casualties but nothing like what any opponent has suffered at our hands as a consequence. And I am set on a course to make sure we remain that way. I want a safe and happy home for my pack, but most of all for Devon, and the family I want to have with her. And when we do decide to have one, they will be safe in the knowledge that no one will harm a hair on their head. I bow my head and rest my forehead to hers. I’d lost this battle, and I was giving her what she wanted. But. How I was going to give it, I still wasn’t sure.
‘Okay, baby, you got it. But I want to talk this over first, okay?’
She nods and smiles. I fucking hate the thought of her going in there without me, but I don’t know if I can do what I need to do with her watching me either.
‘Brad?’
‘Sup?’ He comes out of the cell and over to me.
‘Put the lights back on and crank the sound up. I’ll be back in ten.’
He nods and walks back into the cell we were working in. We have the UV lights set up, and the sound cranked high in their earphones. Sleep deprivation, the easiest and yet one of the worst forms of torture. It fucks with your head. Howard and Harrison are at the far end of the corridor. They nod as I take Devon up the stairs. She has a look of confusion on her face, but I don’t question it. I just want to keep her moving in the direction further away from this shit. I get her to the library. I sit her in the chair and look on the shelves for a book. It’s a particular book that teaches ancient torture methods, used over the years, right up to the modern day. I find it and hand it to her. Frowning, she takes it from me and seats herself in the winged back chair that she seems to love. I will let her have this if she really wants it, but she needs to know what happens when I go down into those cells. I watch as her face scrunches up as she turns the first page, and she slowly flicks through the book. Her lip curls up and her eyebrows scrunch down as I see the disgust on her face. I get a glimmer of hope. But then she looks up at me,
‘Why rats? That’s really gross,’ she says as she closes the book.
‘That’s it? That’s the only question you got? From the whole book? Rats?’
She smiles and places the book on the small table, as she stands and wraps her arms around my waist.
‘I would cave immediately if someone put rats on my stomach,’ she says in a mocking tone.
‘Ah well, Now I know your weakness.’ I laugh. ‘Seriously, though, looking through the book is one thing, being a part of and doing that shit is a whole lot different. You get me?’
‘Jared, I didn’t ever think I would be kidnapped and beaten the shit out of, but I was, and I got through it. I didn’t have a choice in that. My only choice was to survive and get through it—this is my choice, and if I regret it later that’s all on me. I want to do it. I deserve to.’ I nod, taking in what she’s saying. I still wasn’t happy about it.
‘Okay, baby. If that’s what you want. But for the record, I still don’t fucking like it.’
‘Thank you.’ She kisses me like I just gave her a fucking gift. Yeah, the gift of nightmares for the rest of her life. I still haven’t decided if I want her in there with me, or if it’s best to let her go in with Brad. I’m still feeling a bit territorial where he’s concerned, and I know it’s stupid, but I’m weighing that over letting her see me go to work on these fuckers? The latter isn’t something I want her to see. But then what if she freaks the fuck out and can’t handle it? I need to fucking be there for her. Fuck me. I’m like a fucking woman—worried about feelings and shit. Right! Decision made. I take her hand and walk back toward the cells. Devon doesn’t say a word. So I don’t either. I’m worried that if I speak anymore, I’ll change my mind and march her right back out. Harrison is pacing the corridor when we get to the bottom of the stairs.
‘You okay, man?’
‘Want to get in there,’ he says pointing to the first cell. He’s twitchy as fuck and practically shaking with adrenaline.
‘Harrison, we aren’t ready for that yet.’ He was the best in the game and loved it too—definitely a bit weird in the head. But if we let him loose on them now, they would cave or die quickly. We wanted them to suffer, and we all wanted to have a pop at them first. He didn’t fuck about, and no one else would ever learn shit if they didn’t have a chance. I walk Devon right past him, and he continues to pace. I shake my head and shout for Brad. He pops his head out of Kristen’s cell at the end.
‘C’mere, I have a job for you.’
‘For fuck’s sake. I want to get in on this shit! Always left behind, never doing the good shit,’ he moans, and I shake my head.
‘Listen, dickhead. I’m not pulling you off this. I’m just adding a duty.’
He frowns and looks from me to Devon and back again. She’s smiling like she just got the lottery win. Fuck me.
‘Devon wants in, and I think it's best she goes in there with you, not me.’
He frowns a bit deeper. ‘Why?’
‘Does it fuckin matter why? Just take her in with you for fuck’s sake,’ I tell him, my patience with this now gone. I walk away from them both, and I know I need to be down there for her, but I need to get away from it. I don’t like her doing this shit—number one. I don’t like her being in there without me—number two, and I don’t like her alone with Brad—number three. As fucked up as it is I need to let her do this without me because I can’t handle that she’s doing it. And it’s something she needs. So I leave the house and head to the forest. I strip and feel the first tingles and shooting pains that the change brings about. I’m ready to lose myself in my inner wolf and let go of my emotions. I take off running as my body finalises the change and I feel nature calling to me.
Devon
I walk into the cell with a very confused Brad. But he doesn’t question me. He simply starts to crank a wheel on the wall and the guy dangling from the very beautifully tied ropes starts to descend. He hits the lights, and the very powerful strip lights turn off, leaving me blinking, trying to make my eyes adjust to the now much darker cell. Then he pulls the buds that are blasting out noise from his ears. The asshole is panting—he’s soiled himself, and he stinks. Brad pulls him up and throws him into the far corner. He isn’t capable of doing anything—he’s a mess. But Brad doesn’t turn his back. Instead, he points to a chair and asks me to get it. I do, and I put it in the centre where he points. There are metal rings attached to the cell floor, and I briefly wonder what they are for but then Brad does something with the rope, and I get my answer. The asshole is now attached to the chair and to the floor. Nothing quite as beautiful as the knots that were tied before but it works. The asshole’s eyes have obviously adjusted because they widen at the sight of me. And my anger flares.
He scoffs a little, trying for bravado, but I don’t fall for the pathetic attempt. I can smell the fear oozing from him. It acts like a drug to my wolf. And I can feel her pulsing under my skin. The stench of fear making my body want the change. But I’ve had years of practice, keeping it under wraps, so I manage with no problem at all. I stare at the piece of shit and let all the hate bubble to the surface. I lash out and punch him in the face. His head snaps backwards, but he doesn’t make a sound. And that upsets me. I want to hear him suffer. I bring back my arm and punch from my shoulder, once, twice, on the third he groans and mumbles for me to stop before he passes out. I look to Brad who gestures to the asshole with a ‘go for it’ look on his face. I suddenly feel alive. Like I’ve waited for this my whole life. I’m taking my revenge for everything they have done to Maiya, and me, I let my brain clear and my wolf come to the forefront of my mind. I’m careful. I don’t want to change, just to let her think freely in this form.
‘What do we have?’ I ask Brad. He looks confused, so I elaborate. ‘Methods? What can I use?’
‘Oh umm, pretty much anything you like? I can get it set up, or you can carry on how you are?’
‘I want a table and lots of water. And a cloth please.’
His eyes widen a little, but he gets it under control quickly.
‘Waterboarding?’ he asks seemingly surprised.
‘Umm hmm,’ I think that’s what they called it in the book. But whatever.
‘Howard, Harrison?’ Brad shouts, and they come through the door.
‘Waterboarding. Devon wants it set up in here.’
Howard leaves the room, and I notice the look on Harrison’s face as he looks at the asshole in the chair. I’m confused by it. I look harder and just as I realise what it is he looks directly at me and smiles. Longing, that’s what it is. I take all of him in then, and I notice the twitching of his hands the tick in his jaw. The rapid blinking of his eyes. Either he’s high, or he’s desperate for some action in this room. The way he’s studying the guy, I’d say it’s the latter. Howard comes back with a barrel and a hose. The hose is attached to the main supply somewhere, so I’m wondering why the barrel? Then he places it behind the chair and pulls the chair back on its two back legs. He secures it on a lean so it won’t move. Perfect. So easy. Harrison is still pacing, but I like his presence here. I’m fairly sure the asshole will shit his pants at the mere sight of him. That’s what I want. Howard and Harrison turn to leave, and I can see in his face the craving he has for this.
‘Harrison?’ he turns to look at me, with a tense jaw and lifts his chin in answer. ‘Please, can you stay?’
‘Errr, Devon. We ain’t at that point yet,’ Brad jumps in, but I don’t take my eyes off Harrison. This is who I want in the room. This is who will show me what it's really like. I don’t want a watered-down version. I want the dark, the gritty, the violent, and dirty, all of which I can see in his eyes right now. If I were to meet him in a dark alley, I would run screaming for the hills just from that look. Cold hard killer. And he is on my side.
‘You said I could have any method I want?’
Brad scrubs at his face. He looks worried.
‘Yeah, but this is not what I had in mind, and I’m pretty sure Jared wouldn’t let you watch Harrison at work.’
‘Jared isn’t here.’ I tilt my head and raise my brows, challenging him.
‘Fuck me. He’ll go bat shit crazy.’
He looks around. Howard is hovering at the door. He nods to Brad, and Brad lets out a resigned sigh.
‘Right, okay, whatever you need. Fuck. But if he goes nuclear—’
‘I'll deal with it,’ I cut in.
He nods and heads to the door.
‘Bring my kit,’ Harrison speaks for the first time, the excitement clear in his voice. Brad mumbles several more curses as he leaves the room. Harrison grins at me when we’re alone, just the unconscious asshole between us. I smile back, knowing it’s a thanks for letting him loose.
‘How do you usually work someone over?’ I ask, genuinely curious.
‘Depends,’ he answers looking over the guy with assessing eyes.
‘On what?’
‘On who’s been at them first. I don’t usually get time to play,’ he says still looking at the guy.
‘You enjoy this obviously?’
He nods, grinning.
‘Good, let’s start then shall we?’
He doesn’t give me an answer. Instead, he walks straight to the guy, lifts the hose and flips a switch—the water trickles out onto assholes face. Just a little.
‘Wakey wakey, cocksucker. It’s playtime.’ He hovers over his face, and when the guy opens his eyes, he yelps and starts to struggle in his bindings.
‘Ah, there you are. I was beginning to think you’d checked out, fucker.’ I watch as he places the cloth over his face, then, as the water gathers speed he places the hose over his mouth and nose. Asshole coughs and splutters, shaking his head from side to side, and I get the urge to go over and hold his head. I take a step and hesitate. Harrison sees me, and his lip quirks up a little at the side. He nods his head down toward where I was headed—an invitation to do what I want. He understood just from that small movement what I needed to do. I hold his head tight. One hand in his hair, the other on his forehead, and it makes what Harrison is doing with the hose all that much easier. I visualise the mess that Maiya was in. How he made me feel. And hate fills me once again. He’s choking, and Harrison lets up, removing the cloth from his face. I let go, and we watch as he hacks up all the water that’s entered his lungs. He’s gasping in huge gulps of air. When I think he’s had enough air, I pull his hair back and hold him in position. Harrison doesn’t speak. He just places the cloth back over his face and pours the water again. I count the seconds as I watch Harrison silently mouth each number. He stops again, and the asshole is hacking it all up again. I’m soaking from the water, but I don’t care. I’m transfixed, and I can’t look away. I’m enjoying his suffering. How sick is that?
‘Now asshole. I’ll ask you the same fucking question you’ve been asked a hundred times already. You can answer if you want? It won’t be so much fun for us, but I’ll give you a quick death. Or, and this is my favourite, you can keep your fucking mouth shut, and the fun just gets better and better, capiche?’
‘Fuck you,’ the asshole groans, making Harrison’s face split into a huge grin. I feel butterflies in my stomach, and I suddenly feel nervous. Not afraid, just nervous of the unknown.
‘Aww but I haven’t asked the question yet, fucker. You’re jumping the gun,’ he says with a smile on his face like he’s talking to a small child. I snigger. I can’t help it. Maybe it’s the situation I’m in, or the nerves I’m feeling, but I can’t help it. The snigger turns into a laugh, and before I know it, I’m busting a gut laughing. What the actual fuck is happening to me? Harrison’s head tilts to the side with a smile as he looks at me. I’ve got tears streaming down my face, and I’m trying like hell to get myself under some sort of control when he bends over double and laughs with me. I’ve seen infectious laughter at work before, and this was definitely that, but what a bizarre set of circumstance to be laughing like this. The door opens, and Brad sticks his head in.
‘Everything okay?’ he asks raising his eyebrows and looking from Harrison, to me, and back again’ We nod, and I try to speak, but can’t. I take a deep breath and calm myself. Harrison does the same.
‘You sure?’ Brad asks one eyebrow raised. ‘’Cause I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve heard him laugh’ he says to me pointing at Harrison. ‘Even my best jokes don’t crack him.’
‘That’s ‘cause your jokes are shit,’ Harrison retorts.
‘Well, fuck you, asshole. My jokes are the best,’ Brad says in mock offence. ‘Anyway, get back to fucking work you two,’ he says, winkin
g at me. I turn to the asshole still laid back and coughing up his oesophagus, and I get my serious face back in place. This is a serious business after all.
‘You’ve had enough of a break,’ I tell him, ‘Either talk now or this gets a whole lot worse for you.’ His eyes swivel my way. And just as he’s about to tell me to go fuck myself, Harrison kindly fills his mouth with water, so he’s cut off.
‘No one ever teach you manners, fucker? This here is a lady. You don’t talk shit to a lady,’ he says pushing the hose further inside his mouth. Howard comes in then, takes note of me holding the guy’s head back, and he kind of looks pleased. Proud? It’s fleeting though because in true Howard style he says nothing. He just walks up to Harrison and hands him a roll of cloth. No, not cloth. It's leather. In his other hand is a small holdall. Harrison stops what he’s doing, taking it from him and allows asshole to cough up another lung. He grins from ear to ear, and I feel those butterflies again—the anticipation growing inside me from what he’s going to do next. Harrison seems happy at the prospect of showing me too.
After a run and some time clearing my head, I go back to the house. I find Brad in the kitchen, eating a sandwich. Well, inhaling it would be more accurate.
‘Where’s Devon?’
I assume she’s upstairs or somewhere since I left her with Brad and he’s in the kitchen. But his face tells me different, and I immediately go on high alert. He looks really worried.
‘What the fuck, Brad? Tell me you haven’t left her down there alone?’
He shakes his head, and I wait impatiently while he chews and swallows.
‘I haven’t left her down there alone,’ he says, and I feel a little relief until Howard walks in. And my head swings to him and to Brad again. Brad’s face changes.
‘Who the fuck is she with?’ I ask, but I’m already heading for the stairs. This can’t be good. The only other person allowed down there today is fucking Harrison. Jesus fucking Christ. I fly down the stairs three at a time, and slam the door open.
Forbidden Love (Stone Pack Book 1) Page 30