Because of that, I try to be a realist. There’s nothing wrong with dreaming big, as long as you don’t keep your head in the clouds so much that your feet leave the ground.
Come to think of it, maybe that’s why I’m not spoiled. I know the world doesn’t revolve around me. Never has. Never will.
***
When I got home after the show, I called my best friend Emily to tell her the news. Since she went to the show on opening night, she wasn’t there to hear the big announcement, and I couldn’t go without her squeals of delight. She picked up on the second ring.
“Hey, loser. What do you want?” Ah, her loving insults.
“Hey, freak. Guess what?”
“The show went well? Or did you trip on stage and make a spectacle of yourself and I missed it?”
“Yeah, but that’s not what I’m calling about.”
“What? You fell and I missed it?” She sounded genuinely disappointed.
“No, I didn’t fall on stage.”
“Well, spit it out.”
“You don’t waste any time, do you?”
“Laci!” The impatience echoed through the phone.
“Okay, okay,” I paused for dramatic effect. “I got a movie!”
“What? You bought a DVD? Why the hell are you calling me about that?” She can be so dense sometimes. She’s lucky I love her.
“Em, think about it. I got a movie.”
“Wait. Oh my God, you’re kidding! Holy hell!” She shrieked with glee, not unlike my mom had done. It was just the response I was looking for. “Like, a real movie?”
“Yes!” I laughed. “I’m actually signed to be in a real movie! Remember the one I auditioned for a couple of months back?”
“The one with that guy who directed the Twilight movie?”
“Yeah. That’s the one! Dad’s trying to work it out so we start filming after graduation.”
“Oh my God, I’m coming over so we can celebrate. Be there in five.”
Five minutes later, she was on my doorstep. In classic Emily fashion, she high-fived my dad when she strolled into the living room and then dragged me to her car. We drove to the store and managed to buy every possible sundae topping we could get our hands on. From there, the night consisted of watching Disney movies and belting songs at the top of our lungs until we eventually fell asleep on the couch with ice cream bowls strewn across the coffee table.
***
Two weeks later, Dad texted me while I was bored out of my skull in my AP Calculus class.
Got the producer 2 hold off, told u i could do it. :P
I guess I wouldn’t be switching to online school, after all. Mr. Crayton never cared if we texted in his class, not that it would have stopped us if he did. Either way, I responded.
First of all, you’re ridiculous with that text lingo. Second, I guess this means I don’t get to leave the nest just yet. Bummer.
Yeah. Bummer, ur mom and me were looking forward 2 turning ur room into a home theater. lol
If I come home and there’s a popcorn machine on my dresser, I’m gonna be ticked.
When it came down to it, I kind of liked school, so a little part of me was secretly relieved I didn’t have to leave just yet. Granted, on a movie set, I wouldn’t have to sit and listen to (ignore) a middle-aged Russian man drone on about derivatives, but I also wouldn’t ever get the last few months with my friends back, either.
***
Luckily, there was no popcorn machine on my dresser when I got home—just the ballerina jewelry box Dad gave me for my fourth birthday, some makeup I was too lazy to put away, and my favorite bottle of perfume. I peeled off my clothes, tossed them into the hamper, and yanked on my favorite pajama pants and an old t-shirt. To complete my homeless look, I threw my hair in a messy bun and washed off my makeup, revealing the all-too-present reminder under my eyes that I really needed more sleep.
After I went through my daily after school routine of snacks, practicing piano, homework, an awesome dinner, going for a short run, and then a quick shower, I fell into bed for the night with my head swirling. I still could hardly believe it. This could actually work, I thought. For all I knew, this could be the start of something big. My first film could lead to another film, and maybe another.
Life is good.
Chapter Two
Noah
There’s no better feeling in the world than sitting on the back of a bull, the chute about to open, your heart pounding with the rush…except maybe the applause that comes when you’ve held on for eight seconds and the crowd goes wild.
There’s also no better feeling than sitting on the back of a horse, something I’ve done as long as I can remember. Why should the night before my twenty-second birthday be any different? To be fair, I ride horses every day, but I don’t get to slow down and just enjoy it too often. There’s always training or competition. As a professional bull rider, and a damn good one, the quiet moments are few and far between.
So, I’m thankful for the times when I can saddle up Ella and set her off at a canter. About a mile away from the barn, I slowed her to a walk and just admired the night. The good thing about being in the middle of nowhere is that you can look up and see the stars—really see them. That’s not something that can’t be said for a lot of places. I tilted my head back and breathed in a lungful of the fresh air. God, that felt good.
I stopped Ella, and she dropped her head down to graze. I leaned back on my girl—the only girl I’d ever truly need—to focus on the stars. I’ve always been a bit of a closet astronomy nerd. The Big Dipper and Leo are the most obvious constellations in April, so I laid there, staring at good old Ursa Major and letting my mind wander. Just as I began to think about the next day, what I wanted to do for my birthday—maybe drink a few beers after I win my circuit, no big deal—the soft clops of another horse approached. Not wanting to sit up just yet, I turned my head to see who was coming up from behind. A little grin spread across my lips.
Jamie.
I should have known if anyone would find me in the middle of nowhere, it would be her. I’ve known Jamie for as long as I’ve been on the circuit. It was hard not to get to know her. She’s gorgeous, and she happens to serve as our manager and gate man. Quite the feat considering her size. She isn’t very tall. Actually, she’s the opposite. Standing probably five feet and three inches off the ground, her waist-length blonde hair sort of overpowers her thin physique, but she’s a bombshell. From time to time, we’ve messed around, but never anything serious and never out in the open. If anyone else knew about it, we would’ve caught a special kind of hell.
Jamie’s hair flowed in the moonlight as her and Smackers, her horse, trotted toward me. Smackers whinnied when he saw Ella. I’ve got a theory that he’s got the hots for her. Of course, nobody can tell for sure, but it’s a guy thing. He wants her.
Jamie stopped him right next to Ella and mimicked me by lying back on him for a better view of the sky the same way I laid on Ella.
“So, Almost Birthday Boy, what’re you doing out here?”
“Well, I wanted some alone time, but I guess that’s not gonna happen, huh?” I joked.
“Excuse me,” she added as she sat up with a shit-eating grin. “I guess Smackers and I’ll just leave you be.” With a nudge into his sides, she took off.
“Hey! I didn’t say that!” I shouted, sitting up and urging Ella to move. When Jamie noticed we were almost caught up, she sped up so Smackers was essentially in a full-out gallop. Being the naturally competitive guy that I am, I couldn’t let her beat me, so I gave Ella the command and broke out into a sprint. We caught up and overtook them. Since I was too busy glancing backward, I almost got slammed by a tree branch until Ella came skidding to a halt, throwing her head and giving me a few pissed-off grunts.
Jamie was laughing much too hard for my taste when she came to a stop nearby. “Good job, Mister Professional Bull Rider, you almost got bucked off a mare on a leisurely nighttime stroll. Proud of ya.”
<
br /> I groaned as I dismounted, then looked over Ella’s legs and hooves to make sure she hadn’t hurt them in her hasty attempt to stop. Once satisfied, I tied the reins to a branch nearby and leaned against the tree, looking at Jamie.
“So, Not Almost Birthday Girl, what’re you doing out here?” I asked. She slid off the back of her horse and tied his reins to another branch before stepping up to me and grabbing me by the shirt. She fixed those mesmerizing green eyes of hers on me and then pressed her lips to mine. They tasted sweet— like that damn cake batter Chapstick she always had in her pocket— and my mind went totally blank. I couldn’t help it. Beautiful girls have always had a way of turning my brain to mush temporarily, but then again, most men probably have that problem. I folded my arms tightly around her waist and lifted her up so I didn’t have to bend over double to reach her lips. Wrapping her legs around me, she moved her hands up to interlace her fingers behind the back of my neck.
Exactly how long we stood there kissing, I couldn’t tell you, but when we finally broke apart and I put her down, my mind was spinning. Apparently, my expression matched how I felt because she laughed and waved her hand in front of my face.
“Earth to Noah!”
I snapped out of my haze and focused on her. “S−sorry,” I stammered, absentmindedly pushing my hand through my hair.
Jamie cocked her head to the side and asked, “You alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“Normally after a make-out session, you don’t look like someone just killed your dog.”
Truth be known, I didn’t actually know what the problem was. A few minutes ago, my mind was blissfully empty, and now…well, now it was troubled for reasons I couldn’t quite put my finger on. She stepped close to me again and stood on her tiptoes to run her hands through my hair. After they had explored my hair, her palms settled on either side of my face as she stared into my eyes. The sudden upswing in intimacy made me uncomfortable for some strange reason—it never had before—and I stepped back, turning around to untie Ella’s reins.
“I’m sorry, Jamie. I have to go.” And just like that, I hopped into the saddle. I didn’t even bother to look over my shoulder as I left.
Maybe it was awful of me to leave like that, but I had to get away from the situation. I didn’t know why, I just knew that I had to. I headed back to the barn, put Ella in a stall for the night, and went to bed. As I laid there, staring at the ceiling, the hollow space in the middle of my head finally filled up.
You see, I don’t have the slightest intention of being with Jamie in anything long term. I can’t afford to have a distraction like her. Truth is, Jamie’s great. She’s sweet, we have a lot in common, and she’s easily accessible. But she’s far too gorgeous to keep out of my head when it counts.
Don’t ask why it suddenly mattered to me. I couldn’t have told you if I wanted to. We’d been involved for quite some time. It’d never crossed my mind before, but something snapped inside of me standing there under that tree and I suddenly felt like an ass for leading her on. Maybe it was the way she cupped her hands around my face, I don’t know, but I got the feeling she was falling for me and I couldn’t let it go any farther. My Mama raised me better than that. I glanced at the clock—twenty minutes ‘til midnight—and fell into a restless sleep thinking about the talk I knew I was going to have to have with Jamie before I headed home for the summer.
***
When I woke up the next morning, I hadn’t even thought about it being my birthday. My mind was already in the arena. That is, until I went with the crew out for a “show day” breakfast to a little Mom-and-Pop diner down the road. After I had ordered, I went to the bathroom to wash up. I came back to a stack of pancakes with candles jammed into them and “Happy BDay Noah!” written in what appeared to be chocolate sauce. I sat down and everyone around me instantly burst into a rousing, and very off-key, rendition of “Happy Birthday” before throwing birthday punches and grinding noogies into my skull like I was five.
That was the thing about being a bull rider at the tender age of twenty-two: everyone who has been around a while treats you like you’re a kid. Even when you win. Not a single old-timer (as I call them to get a rise out of them) I encountered took me seriously my first year on the circuit. So naturally, I had to act like a hard ass in order to earn any respect. Even now, while I’m sure they have the best intentions and want me to do well, I can tell some of them aren’t so sure just yet I have it in me to be successful. Which really blows sometimes, but other times, I couldn’t give a rat’s ass. When it comes down to it, I can always show them they’re wrong.
Speaking of showing them they’re wrong, after breakfast that’s just what I geared up to do. I got to the stables and started my usual pre-ride routine to get myself in the zone—a few jumping jacks to get the blood flowing, stretches to loosen up, and finally, I saddled up on Ella to go for a ride to clear my head. The pre-ride ride with Ella is probably the most important part of any pre-circuit preparation. Call it a psychological thing if you will, like they do for basketball players and their lucky socks. My game just isn’t as strong if I don’t go on my ride, even if it’s just around the arena before the crowd starts to set in. I missed it once and my performance was so weak that I got bucked off after four seconds. Everyone knows when they pull the gate, you’ve got to make eight. That’s why my routine is important.
When I got back from my ride, I gave Ella an apple and a good nose rub for luck and put her back in her stall. After a few more stretches, I changed into my favorite chaps and put on my hat and boots. I was feeling good about this one. I knew the arena like the back of my hand. That helps with the nerves. Though I try to hide it, I still get nervous, even though I’ve been riding bulls since I was twelve. I imagine I’ll get nervous right up until I ride my last bull.
Jamie functioning as our gateman helped a little, too. Some places don’t let her because she’s a woman, but as far as I’m concerned, if she gets the job done, that’s all that matters. And Jamie gets the job done and done well. I can’t say that for every guy (or girl) who opens the gate to let the bull out of the chute. If the gate man isn’t competent, things can go real bad, real fast. Jamie’s both competent and quick. And a rider needs quick, because as soon as the gate opens and the bull’s shoulder pass the end, the timer starts and the judges start watching to score the rider and the bull. Most riders average in the high seventies. Hitting a score of ninety means you’ve made a name for yourself. And that was my intention, to make a name for myself.
An hour later, I got that chance.
It was finally my turn. The arena director shooed me towards the holding pen and assured me that things were really heated up. I was the last rider of the day, so I ought to “go out with a bang,” he said. Yeah. No pressure there.
I approached the gate as I shrugged on my protective vest and wiggled my hand into my glove. The flank man tightened the flank strap, and just before I got on, Jamie flashed me a wink and that pearly white smile. I felt my insides squirm a little, but pushed the feeling down and scolded myself. Damn it, Noah, keep it together. Don’t break focus. Come on. The last thing you want is to be bucked off on your birthday. I shook my head to clear it and settled in. When I was ready, I gave the nod. Jamie opened the gate, and my ride started.
This bastard’s gonna give me a good score was the only thought that ran through my head. When the buzzer sounded, it was over and I dismounted—not so gracefully, but I landed on my feet. The bullfighter leaped into the arena and started to distract the bull as I ran out and leaped over the gate, jumping up next to Jamie.
She slugged me on the arm. “Now, that was a ride! You had to have broken ninety. Easily.”
“Easy on the arm,” I joked, rubbing my arm. She always punched me when a ride was good, and she never remembered to do it on the arm I didn’t just use to grip a bucking bull. “Do you really think it was that good? I mean, that sucker was all over the place, but it didn’t feel like the k
ind of ride that would hit the top notch mark.”
“Definitely did,” she insisted.
The next thirty seconds felt like an hour, but it was worth the wait. The announcer blasted a ninety-one for my score and the crowd erupted in applause.
Like I said, best feeling in the world.
My birthday plan was officially half-executed. I’d just broke ninety. It was time for a few of those beers. Everyone hit the bar and drank to my birthday and my big win. Now, that’s what I’m talking about. When the night was over, I fell into bed for the night with my head swirling.
Life is good.
Chapter Three
Laci
“You’ve got to be joking. Please tell me you’re joking,” I begged. I looked down at my graduation gown at the barbecue sauce stain Emily was pointing to. “Ugh, I am the only person in the entire world who could find a stain on her white graduation gown two minutes before we walk,” I groaned. “I need that stain stick thing you had in the car!”
“You’re lucky,” she said, pulling the stain remover out of her cap.
“How even?” I asked in awe. “And, you’re the only person in the entire world who could find a way to keep a stain stick in your graduation cap. Brava, I’m impressed.”
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