by Nicole Hart
“Fuck, I hope so,” I answered honestly.
“Wait, what’s that?” he asked, stopping, grabbing my elbow. I listened as a groaning sound roared above us. It resembled the sound of a helicopter, but then it faded out and Crawford dropped his arm and slumped his shoulders.
“Just the wind, man, go get your stuff,” I said as I started walking again, motioning for him to follow.
I had to get off this fucking ship. I had to get back to her. To them. I would make this right if I was given the chance.
“Please give me the chance,” I prayed out loud as I walked back into my room to get my stuff together.
Fight Without Fear
38 hours. I had been staring at my TV for 38 hours watching the progression of the storm. I hadn’t eaten, and I had slept for maybe six hours, by accident. My eyes went from the TV to my phone screen, waiting for some kind of news. But nothing. Not a single word about him. Brooklyn had asked me numerous times if she could change the channel, but I couldn’t. The storm had moved into the Gulf and was now making landfall in Louisiana and Mississippi as a category 3. The aftermath was devastating. I tried to turn it off, but I couldn’t. I should stop watching this, but I couldn’t.
It was almost midnight and as I lay on my couch, in the darkness—other than the light from the TV—my eyes started to get heavy, my mind and body beyond exhausted. The ding of a text message startled me awake and I jerked my hands awkwardly in every direction, searching for it.
“Please be ok. Please be ok,” I whispered as I pulled my phone from under me, scared to death to look at the screen, but needing answers more than anything else.
It was from Cain.
“Oh God, please no,” I whispered, tears welling up in my eyes. He hated me; he wouldn’t text me unless it was bad. My hands started to shake as I swiped the screen, opening the message.
Cain: He’s safe. A charter bus is bringing him to the shipyard. Scheduled to arrive at 7 am.
The tears started falling down my cheeks. He’s safe. Thank God, he’s safe. I scrolled down my contacts without thinking and tapped his name. It rang over and over without an answer. Damn it. I wanted to hear his voice. I needed to see his face.
Thank you. I replied to Cain’s text. He didn’t respond and that was ok. I was thankful he even texted me. Surprised, but thankful.
5:30 a.m.
I couldn’t wait another minute. I had been ready for an hour, but knew I needed to let Brooklyn sleep.
“Honey, it’s time to wake up,” I said quietly, as I rubbed my hand down her back.
“Five minutes, momma,” she mumbled.
“Brookie, I need you to wake up and get ready, ok?”
“Ok.” She sat up, her eyes still closed, her hair a wild mess.
“Are you awake?” I asked with a giggle.
“Mmmhmm,” she said.
“Listen, honey, you’re not going to school today, you’re going to come with me ok?”
“I’m going to work with you?” she asked, wiping her eyes with her fist.
“No, honey, um . . . we’re going to see Ryker,” I said, and waited for her response. I hadn’t mentioned that he was stuck in the storm, of course. I hadn’t mentioned him to her at all. But my girl was smart, and this was her life, too. She deserved the truth.
“What?” she said, popping her eyes open and smiling from ear to ear.
“Ryker was stuck out in the big storm over the ocean, but he’s safe, and we are going to see him, ok?”
“Don’t mess with me, momma! Are we really going to see him?” She slid off her bed, landing on her feet.
“We’re really going to see him.” I smiled, knowing this was the right thing to do.
Brooklyn got ready in record time, and we pulled up to the docks less than an hour later. The last hour had been full of questions. How long was he stuck in the ocean? Did he get wet? Did I still love him? Could we make him spaghetti for dinner? Did you finally decide to be brave, momma?
When I parked the car, I noticed other people walking into a warehouse. I stared at the crowd, unsure of what to do next. That’s when I spotted Cain getting out of his SUV, holding a black umbrella, wearing slacks and a white button down shirt, following the people into the building.
“Let’s go inside here,” I said turning the car off, and grabbing our umbrella as I opened the back door.
“This rain is cold, momma.” She giggled.
“I know, let’s hurry.” I grabbed her by the hand and we ran into the building.
There were at least thirty people inside—sitting, standing, staring out the windows and pacing. All of them waiting.
I saw Cain sitting in a chair close to the window, holding a Styrofoam cup of coffee. He was staring out the window, not taking his eyes off the entrance. I walked over to him, still holding Brooklyn’s hand.
“Cain,” I said quietly, waiting for him to look in my direction.
“Natalie,” he said without an ounce of emotion, but gave a little smile when his eyes met Brooklyn. “And you must be Brooklyn,” he said, holding out his hand for her to shake.
“Who’s that momma?” Brooklyn asked, looking up at me.
“This is Cain, Ryker’s brother,” I said.
“Oh, you don’t look like Ryker,” she said, giving him a puzzled look. Cain just gave her a little smile as she shook his hand.
“Thank you, Cain,” I said quietly.
“He’s my brother, I would do anything for him. And I know he wants you here,” he said simply as his phone rang.
“Excuse me,” he said, pulling it out of his pocket and walking away from us.
“Is that him, momma?” Brooklyn squealed, tapping her finger on the glass. My stomach started doing flips as the people around us started shuffling to the windows.
“I hope so,” I whispered, grabbing her hand and squeezing it.
“Don’t be nervous, momma,” Brooklyn said, kissing my hand.
“There he is!” Brooklyn yelled, ripping her hand from mine and bolting to the door.
“Brooklyn!” I called to her, but she was already pushing the door open.
I weaved through the crowd of people gathering, finally making my way to the door. I walked outside, searching for them through the misty rain blowing around.
There he was. He looked tired and almost sad, until he spotted Brooklyn. A huge grin spread across his face as he squatted down, wrapping his arms around Brooklyn, as she leapt into him. He stood to his feet, still holding on to her, but his eyes were searching. My feet started to move fast, then to a full run, my body and my heart needing to be close to him. I slammed my body into his, wrapping my arms around his waist, the tears starting to fall. I missed him so much.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” he said, kissing my forehead, then pressing his lips to mine, my mouth trembling,
“I’m so glad you’re ok. I missed you,” I whispered against his mouth.
“I’m sorry,” he said, then kissing my lips again, then the tip of my nose, then my lips again.
“I’m sorry,” I repeated.
“I love you, Natalie,” he said as he kissed me again.
“I love you too, Ryker, so much,” I whispered to him.
“Well I love both of y’all!” Brooklyn giggled, still in Ryker’s arms, her face close to mine.
“We love you too, Brooklyn!” he said, tickling her tummy.
“Can we go home now? It’s cold out here!” She giggled.
“Let’s go home,” I said, staring at Ryker.
“No place I’d rather be.” he said, kissing Brooklyn on the forehead.
One Year Later
As we sat in the small room, waiting for our appointment, I watched Brooklyn sitting in Ryker’s lap, reading to him. I couldn’t help but reflect on the last year. It had been a year of changes. Ryker and I worked through our issues with him fighting. I understood his reasons for doing it. I know now that everything he did in his life was for us. He would do whatever he had to do to protect us and gi
ve us the best. I didn’t worry about him fighting again, because he promised he wouldn’t. And he never broke a promise.
I stared down at the simple platinum band that hugged my ring finger. Our promise to each other that day on the beach. It was strong and beautiful, just like our love. My parents came, my mother cried. Cain even attended, which made me happy. He finally came around and realized how much I truly loved his brother. He was protective of him, I understood his reasons.
Brooklyn stood between us, holding our hands and smiling the whole time. I’ll never forget the look on Ryker’s face when the preacher announced us as Mr. and Mrs. Ryker Hamilton. The way he smiled and whispered “I love you, baby” before he slammed his lips into mine. It was perfect. Just like him. I loved that man more than I ever imagined I could. Our road might have taken a detour all those years ago, but I didn’t regret it. It gave me my greatest gift, my Brookie. And I think that deep down, I always knew Ryker was the one.
The little flutter in my tummy reminded me of our newest gift. I put my hand over the place where I felt it, but knew it was too soon to feel from the outside. Ryker was waiting, not so patiently, for that day. I looked over at Ryker who was watching me as Brooklyn continued to read to him. Today was also the day we were telling her that she was going to be a big sister. He gave me a wink and mouthed those words again “I love you.”
“I love you.” I mouthed back to him as the door to the office opened.
“Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton?” the man in the grey suit asked as he looked in our direction. I still loved hearing those words.
“That’s us,” Ryker said as he stood, lifting Brooklyn in the air and setting her on her feet.
We walked into the small office, which was cluttered with files and a bookshelf that spread across an entire wall.
“Please have a seat,” he said as he pointed to the three chairs in front of his desk.
“It looks like this is pretty cut and dry, all the paperwork is in order, I just need you to sign the last of the forms and you can be on your way,” he said, giving us a genuine smile.
“Where do we sign?” Ryker asked as he ruffled Brooklyn’s hair. The lawyer put the last three forms on our side of the desk and we both signed with a smile.
“And that’s it, it’s official,” he said with a smile, and turned to Brooklyn, “What do you think about this, are you happy that Ryker is your dad now?”
“He was my dad a long time ago,” she said with a toothless grin. “But now it’s official—official.” She smiled, grabbing his hand.
“Now can I put Brooklyn Hamilton on my papers at school?” she turned and asked me. She had been wanting to do that since the day we got married.
“You bet,” I said.
“Finally,” she said with a giggle.
“If you don’t mind, we like to take a picture of the family to hang on our adoption wall,” the lawyer said as we all stood.
“Of course,” I said, watching him pull the digital camera from his top drawer
And there we were, an official family. Together and happy. Ryker put his hand on the small of my back, pulling me closer to him as Brookie stood in front of us.
“Say cheese.”
“Cheese!” Brooklyn said loudly, sporting a huge grin, and then turning to Ryker once the picture was taken.
“I love you, daddy,” she said, and wrapped her tiny arms around his waist.
“I love you, too,” Ryker said, lifting her in his arms, and wrapping her up tight.
Life isn’t always perfect, but I’ve learned that love is stronger, even when it’s complicated. And sometimes you just have to be brave, and fight without fear.
First, I want to thank my husband. Thank you for believing in me and always pushing me to pursue my dreams. I love you. More.
Christy, my bestie, my sister. Thank you for encouraging me to keep going.
I also have this amazing group of women in my corner. They promote my work, encourage me and keep me laughing daily. I couldn’t do this if it weren’t for you. So thank you Giovanna, Laurie, Aubrie, Diana and all of my Naughty Bitches. I love you guys!
Kinky Girls Book Obsessions. You girls are amazing to me! I can’t even describe my excitement the first time I received an edit from you. Kellie-you are the QUEEN! You took a chance on me and I could never thank you enough. Big sloppy kisses to all of you!
Also, when I first started this journey, I had no idea I would make such a connection with other authors. First, Sarah Sawyer, you scooped me up from the very beginning and showed me the ropes. I will always be grateful for you! Randa Lynn (My Macie), I loved your face even before I knew it was yours! Thank you for being my friend. Linda Oaks, you my friend, rock! You have the kindest heart and I’m so thankful I’ve gotten the chance to know you.
To all my IG girls! Thank you for everything you do for me! You dirty bitches are the best! Smooches!
The Roughneck Series
Love on a Dirt Road
Back Road Chances
Redemption Road
Her Darkest Road
Coming Soon
The Corridor
Whiskey Bent
Hush
Table of Contents
Dedication
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Epilogue
Acknowledgements
Other Books by Nicole Hart